


Your Youth is No Guarantee…

by LivetoDream333 (orphan_account), xphil98197



Category: James Bond (Craig movies), Sherlock (TV)
Genre: AU, Abandonment, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Sex, Anchor!Q, Deductions, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Everyone Loves Q, Forced Rape, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, I can't tag everything, I love Tiago, Inaccuracies, It's going to be a wild ride, Lots of Angst, Love, M is a bitch, M/M, Oral Sex, Pain, Protective Holmes Family, Protective Q, Q is a Holmes, Torture of all sorts, Trades, Young Q, all of them - Freeform, dependancy, for real, life - Freeform, lots of happiness, really - Freeform, top!Q
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-15
Updated: 2016-03-15
Packaged: 2018-03-17 22:30:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 58
Words: 103,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3546095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/LivetoDream333, https://archiveofourown.org/users/xphil98197/pseuds/xphil98197
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Despite his Dad’s, Papa’s, and Uncle’s attempts to keep him hidden from the world, the world snatches him up. That’s how Hamish Quinton Holmes-Watson became Quartermaster at the age of sixteen…and how he started to fall in love with a recently promoted Double-o. Sherlock and Mycroft don’t take too well to it…and no one takes well to the trouble the young Quartermaster gets himself into.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I will try for once a week updates. Don't shoot me if I fail. I do get busy occasionally.  
> Also! Have you seen the coat, hat, and jumper Q is wearing in Spectre? He looks adorable. If you haven't seen it, IMDB is your new friend.  
> Also, did he say backstory on Q possibly? :D  
> I am happy so this is my gift for you guys.

* * *

 

Prologue

 

“It’s been three days, Sherlock.” John commented as they walked down the street.

“I was gone weeks at a time at his age, hardly a huge deal.”

“He doesn’t have an insane older brother.” John suggested.

“True… But he does forget sometimes.”

“He lives at home still, he’s only sixteen, I don’t like him out so…” John’s eyes widened. “Oh God no.”

“What?” Sherlock looked up at the small house planted in a quaint neighborhood in London. Sherlock’s uncle had left it to Hamish. Hamish didn’t live there, but it was his extra space. Really it was the equivalent of Sherlock’s morgue. Hamish used it to work…and the front door had been smashed open. Sherlock and John both ran, pushing themselves through the door. “Hamish?!” Sherlock shouted into the house. “Hamish!” Sherlock ran through the house, searching the rooms.

“Hamish?” John called out, panic in his voice as he searched the small hidden room in the bedroom, full of computers. “Sherlock, where is he?”

“I don’t… I don’t…” Sherlock’s eyes whirled around, panic clouding his mind. John grabbed his hand tightly.

“Stop, calm down, okay? We can’t do anything panicking.”

“Yeah…yes…um…”

“Lock…look.” John nodded. “His computer, he’d never mangle the cables like that. Someone took it.”

“And him, there was a struggle.” Sherlock said after taking a deep breath. He knelt down and looked at a broken set of glasses. “No…Hamish didn’t struggle, they simply handled him too roughly. Why wouldn’t he struggle? He knows how to fight, we taught him.”

“Too many assailants?”

“Three, no, he would have fought had he really needed to. That means he didn’t feel that they were his enemy. He’s confident he can deal with them. Oh! I know where he is.”

“Is he safe?”

“Not even remotely.” Sherlock hissed, pulling John out the door as he dialed Mycroft.

_“What is it Sherlock?”_

“Get me into MI6, now.”

_“What could cause so much haste, brother mine?”_

“They took Hamish.”

Mycroft had never acted faster.

800Q8

Hamish didn’t move. He just stared at the table in front of him unable to see the details of it clearly. Had he had his glasses he would have surveyed the room around him, but it was too blurry for him to see too much. He could have gotten out of the cuffs that kept his hands attached to the table…but he knew he wouldn’t be able to get out of the room, not without being able to see the lock he was breaking. Running would only get him into more trouble anyway. The door opened and a short figure entered with the click of short heels.

Hamish couldn’t see her properly, but thanks to his dad’s lessons he deduced her before she even sat down across from him.

The woman was the head of MI6.

“See something you like on the table?” M asked after a moment of silence. She’d obviously been watching him, noticing that he’d been staring at it the whole time.

“I can’t see much of anything without my glasses… This room is too small to get into the sight range I can actually see in. Didn’t think to wear contacts today…or, actually, yesterday as you’ve had me here for at least ten hours. I’m good at keeping track of time.”

“What’s your name?”

“Hamish.” Hamish answered truthfully.

“Why did you hack us, Hamish?”

“Which time?” Hamish wondered. He couldn’t see her expression, but he heard a heel click in surprise.

“How many times have you hacked us then?”

“Lost count. It started as a personal challenge, then I was absolutely appalled at all of the flaws in the system so…I started fixing them. I suppose you probably noticed me when I was working on the firewall…should have noticed you tracking it back to me…but I was sleep deprived—that’s the excuse I’m going with.”

“Fixing our systems?”

“Someone has to.”

“What’s your full name, Hamish?”

“Hamish Quinton Watson-Holmes.”

“Holmes?” M asked, raising an unseen eyebrow. “Really?” The door suddenly opened. “What in the hell?”

“I’ll be taking it from here.” A familiar voice said.

“You will not.” M snapped at Mycroft.

“He’s obviously a threat to our nation on the home front, I’ll deal with him.” Hamish winced at the tone. He was in trouble…and not just with his uncle.

“He hacked _us_.”

“Did he?” Hamish sank a little lower in his chair, a more adorable reenactment of Simba attempting to hide in the grass when his father was angry with him. Something tapped on the desk and instantly Hamish reached out, pulling on his old glasses, blinking at the room. Mycroft looked furious.

“We have him in custody, you can’t take him from us, not unless you want me to bring up your involvement with him. Attachment to a hacker, Mycroft. how will that go over?”

The glare Mycroft shot at Hamish spoke volumes: _You told her the truth? You told her who you are? I should let you fry, idiot._

“Sorry?” Hamish said, looking repentant.

“You should see _them_ if you think I’m bad.” Mycroft commented, heading for the door and closing it behind him.

“Can you arrest me? I’d love to be buried in the deepest, darkest prison you can put me in. Better yet, just shoot me. It would be a better death.”

“Why?”

“They warned me not to hack into anyone with semi-decent brains…”

“Well, we obviously don’t have them, since you’ve gotten in and out so many times. Took R two hours to figure out where you were.”

“I’m cautious.”

“How about I don’t burry you in a hole?”

“There’s an option two, ma’am?”

“Work here. I happen to know your family quiet well, if you have half the genius of any of them you would be an asset.”

“I remember you too, though I suppose you wouldn’t remember me. I was five and, admittedly, I was hiding where I shouldn’t have been.”

“You go where you’re told not to a lot?”

“Papa says I have a problem with authority…like my dad.”

“Most of my agents do, you'll fit in.” M smiled, well, _maybe_ it was a smile. “You’ll be shadowing Q if you accept this job. He’s retiring within the year. You’re to take his place. Is that a problem?”

“No ma’am.”

“This job requires some…tests.”

Hamish knew exactly what she was talking about. “I have quite a high pain tolerance… I’m sure I can make it better.”

“Good, any questions?”

“You knew, before you came in here. You knew everything about me…you just wanted to see if I’d lie. Didn’t you?”

“R traced you and studied your work and found you all over the place, fixing missions, altering blueprints, repairing things… Had you lied…I might have worried about a trap planted in the innocence.”

“Oh, good thing I’m honest.”

“Bloody right you are… Had I needed to interrogate you, Mycroft would have made my life hell.”

“I’m glad I’m not the only one intimidated by him.”

“He’s a fucking scary bastard.”

“Yeah…so are my parents.”

“You can’t be Hamish anymore, not after you leave that door.” M commented, not even flinching as Hamish began to undo his bonds.

“Quinton Shaw.” Hamish responded instantly, freed.

“I wish you the best of luck in surviving your family. If you do, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Yes, ma’am.” They shook hands.

The world had just changed its orbit.


	2. That Went Well

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daddy's mad, Papa's calm, and Hamish makes Mrs. Hudson tea.  
> R and Hamish meet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trying to keep updating once a week as promised. :D

That Went Well

 

Hamish sat in the center of the sofa underneath the picture his parents had put up of him, mostly because Hamish hated pictures, so it was one of the only ones with his full face in view and with a smile on his face. John was sitting in his seat, Hamish was glad that his tea was on the table, it meant that he wasn’t furious. Sherlock, however, was pacing furiously and had been for what felt like an eternity. “Dad I’m—”

“What did I tell you?”

“Not to get tangled in things…”

“And what did you do?”

“I got a job.” Hamish couldn’t stop himself, but as soon as the words were out he worried that his father might back-hand him. Neither his dad or papa had ever struck him, but the livid look on his dad’s face was the same one he got when someone had hurt John or Hamish…it was a particularly murderous look.

“He’s got a point.”

“JOHN!”

“Okay, shutting up now…” John said, looking down.

“I don’t even fucking know what to say.” Sherlock hissed, unable to even look at his son. “Was it too much to want you to be safe?”

“In my defense—”

“Did I ask for an excuse, Hamish?”

“No, sir.” Hamish looked down at his shoes. Intellectually—like his dad—Hamish was decades older than his birth date literally made him, unlike his dad he had the emotional age beyond his years as well, thanks to his papa.

“Sherlock—”

“If you defend him you’ll be next.”

“Sherlock… I’m not saying that he wasn’t an idiot, _however_ it worked out, he helped, he doesn’t even have a bruise on him—”

“Wrong! Seven of them on his arms and torso from the agents who snatched them.”

“ _Shut_ _up_ , Sherlock.” John snapped. “All I’m saying is that he handled it well and he’s fine. He already has to deal with the consequences, just calm down.”

“He doesn’t know the consequences! He’ll be Q, John. Assassins from all over would love to have his head.”

“And that’s any different from being a consulting detective’s son how?” Hamish muttered. He’d been kidnapped, shot, stabbed, and beaten a few times in his life. Sherlock turned red. John was instantly up and dragging Sherlock out of the room.

“That went well.” Mrs. Hudson commented once a door had locked behind the pair of men.

“All things considered…” Hamish shrugged. “Would you like a cuppa?”

“Love one, deary.” Mrs. Hudson nodded. Hamish got up and moved to put the kettle on, ignoring the very definite sound of something shattering in his parent’s room.

800Q8

“Ah, you must be Quinton.”

“Q.” Hamish smiled back, shaking the older man’s hand easily.

“You’re the one I had issues with?” A young, petite—literally she was barely five feet tall—woman asked. She had to have been in her mid-twenties, a decade older than Hamish at least. She had short brown hair that was cut asymmetrically. Her blue eyes were hidden by a pair of glasses that slid down her nose. “Good for you.” She smiled, offering her hand.

“Quinton, this is R. The only one in this damn branch who could attempt to keep up with you.”

“You must be brilliant.”

“Ooh, you’re charming, and adorable. I’m going to keep you.” R chuckled as they shook hands. “You’ll be training for Q…he’ll take care of you…but…if you need to talk to anyone else, I’m pretty good myself.”

“Aren’t you next for the job though?”

“Not my cup of tea… I like being R. I was Q for a short while once…not my thing. I’ll be remaining R, thank you for your concern.” She smiled.

“Actually, he’s best to work with you, R. You can speak computer to him far better than I can, my dear. I can teach him all the other things, but you should get him set up.” Q nodded.

“Alright…come with me, Quinton.” R smiled, leading him through the branch, only to get stopped by a tall, attractive but intimidating looking man. Hamish wasn’t afraid, he’d met Mycroft…and plenty of psychopaths in his life.

“How’s my favorite little boffin?”

“Go away, 006, I’m busy.” R said coldly.

“Oh, don’t be like that _darling_. I just want to talk.” He taunted.

“Yes, and try to steal weaponry from me, I’m not an idiot, nor am I gullible or seducible, 006. Leave.”

“You’re no fun, Jenny.” He sighed, patting the top of her head. R punched him and grabbed him by his ear, yanking him down to her level.

“If you fucking call me that again, I’ll make sure your weapon blows up in your face. Got it? That name doesn’t exist.”

“Whoa, calm down, no need to mess up my pretty face.” R glared at him before letting him go. Hamish sort of wanted to call her the Ice Queen…with the icy stare she had—she reminded him slightly of Mycroft in that manner. “Who’s the new boffin? Is he your padawan? Since you’re moving to Q and all.”

“He’s Q’s padawan. And since when did you become cultured?”

“Uh, duh…it’s fucking Star Wars, who hasn’t seen those movies?” 006 rolled his eyes.

“Go bother someone else, I’m busy.”

“Yeah…that newer girl, think I could get her to give me something special?” R sighed and looked down before glaring at him. “I’ll take that as a yes.” He smirked before rushing off.

“R…it’s probably not my place…but do you—”

“Quinton…let me tell you a very important rule about MI6. The double-os make great friends—annoying, but great. Just…” She looked over her shoulder at Alec, flirting with a young woman at a computer. “Just don’t fall in love with any of them. They don’t notice those things. Not their fault but…it just isn’t fun.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault.” R said. “Don’t ever let them get the better of you. Trust me, the double-os need a firm hand. If you’re a pushover they’ll destroy you.”

“Oh, trust me, I can stand up for myself.”

“You look like you’ve had practice.” R chuckled.

“Against terrorists and murderers and a crazy family…yeah…lots of practice.”

“Oh, I was thinking more about school-yard bullies. You’re positively tiny.” It wasn’t offensive, it was teasing, light.

“Says the girl who is exactly five feet tall.” Hamish rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, at least I’m not a bean-poll. A rough wind could knock you over.”

“Unlikely.” Hamish shrugged.

“Just…don’t let them give you any shit, and they will give you a lot of it, especially since you’re so young. The youngest one is twenty-five and that isn’t with adding all the field experience they have. They’re all ancient by normal standards. You can’t let them push you, once they find a weakness they’ll never stop. Don’t get me wrong, they’ll always poke fun…but it’s better to be one that they like, rather than one they see as spineless. Gain their trust and you’re really in the club then, they don’t trust anyone.”

“How do you gain their trust?”

“Be yourself and don’t lie. Just be who you are, they can sniff out liars from across the globe.”

“So can I.”

“Can you? Can you really do that?” R asked. Q held up a finger and looked at 006, looking him up and down quickly before looking at R with a smile.

“Oh yes, I can read people.”

“Prove it.”

“006 has only been a double-o for a year, he was a junior agent for a year prior to that, and before he was brought in by MI6 he was in the Navy. He joined the Navy when he was sixteen. He’s Russian, his parents were killed in front of him as a child—probably when he was quite young—he was orphaned and spent at least four—no—five years on his own before someone took him in. At twenty he met someone important to him, a friend by the looks of it, can never be sure, there’s a fine line between best friends and lovers. It was a male as they both served in the Navy together. He’s broken his right arm twice—once in childhood—and once four months ago. He’s a serial womanizer, but craves genuine affection, love, and attention—as do all with such strenuous weights tied to them. He’s also seriously attracted to you as he has done nothing but look at you since you turned your back and he’s situated himself so that he can watch you easily. He had Thai for breakfast, obviously leftover takeaway from two days ago, he had a rough mission last week, judging by the cut he has on his hands—most likely he cut himself when he threw his plates and shattered them in his rage. He’s been shooting downstairs most of the morning, working on his left-handed aim because of the break he had in his right—wanting to be prepared for everything—it was a Glock. And—”

“Have you read everyone’s file?” R demanded.

“No…I read him. People wear everything on them…well, most people do.”

“Try me.” R said slowly, not quite believing that Hamish could just tell things by looking at people.

“What do you want me to tell you?”

“Something that wouldn’t be in my file.”

“You’re real name isn’t ‘Jenny.’ In fact, I’m quite sure it isn’t even Jennifer. That was the name you choose to go in your file, in memory of someone very dear to you, obviously. You dislike being called Jenny and you cringed at Jennifer, so I suspect those were the names your dear one liked best or worst, hard to tell in such a short time. You must go by Jen, then.” Hamish slowly looked her up and down, narrowing his eyes for a moment. “I should stop.” Hamish said, thankful his papa had taught him the restraint his dad didn’t have.

“No, don’t. Be honest.”

“You know true sorrow.” Hamish continued after a moment. “It isn’t your mother, and if you work at MI6 it’s highly unlikely that you have extended family, they love orphans, so it’s a sister. You took your sister’s name, which implies she’s no longer around to claim it. You switched places with her…she was your twin sister. You lost her traumatically, my guess is that your father killed your mother when you were very young and tortured both you and your sister as you grew up. You both ran, he found you and he killed her in his rage…and you killed him because you were angry. You lived in the streets for years until Q took you into his home, he raised you. You have a certain daughterly affection towards him and an easy manner with him that can only come with years of knowing someone.”

“You didn’t miss a single mark…except that mother died in childbirth.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I’ve gotten on… Dad called her Jenny…she liked being called Jen. I called her Jen.”

“Yes well, sorry for your loss.”

“How do you do that?”

“Family trick.” Hamish chuckled.

“Well, don’t be _that_ honest with the agents, they don’t like people bringing up their pasts.”

“I know how to walk the line.”

“I think you’ll do just fine here. Come on, let me show you around. Then you have to teach me what you were doing to our firewalls, it’s the most beautiful work I’ve ever seen in my life.”

“Thank you… I will.”

“You’ll do fine here.” R nodded again before leading him around.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	3. The Double-os

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q meets the double-os. 005 knows a secret and 007 is in the middle of a mission that will later be named: Casino Royale.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't and never have owned anything. I always forget to say that, but hey, it counts. I've covered everything with this.  
> I love Tiago...just saying.

The Double-Os

 

“You’re my handler?” 009 asked, raising an eyebrow. Hamish was Q. It took five months, but he was Q. The old Q had stayed with them, slowly giving Hamish more and more work until Q was quite content Hamish could handle it on his own and passed the reins into Hamish’s hands completely.

“Yes.”

“Is it April first?”

“No, I am your Quartermaster and you will do well to remember it or I may decide to make sure you fly coach and sleep in bug infested beds until I feel you’re properly repentant.” Q stated.

“You’re tiny. How old are you, five?”

“What age are we talking about, physical or mental? Because mentally I’m about four times your physical age, and that’s saying something, because as far as double-os go you’re ancient.”

“I could break you with one little—” 009 made the wrong move by grabbing the back of Q’s neck. He was on the ground in less than a second.

“Don’t ever threaten me again.” Q said coldly, before turning and taking a sip of his tea. The rest of the branch looked on with wide eyes before turning to their work quickly.

“Well, you handled that well.” R said, stepping over the shocked double-o’s body. “Here are some things you need to fill out.”

“Lovely, thank you R.”

“No problem, Q.” She smiled before walking away.

“How in the hell?” 009 asked.

“I’m quite capable of knocking you on your ass, so if you ever try to grab me again be prepared to break your nose against the concrete.” Q said simply.

“How did you do that?”

“Army brat, some things are genetic.” Q shrugged as 009 got up. “Here’s your kit. I’ll be in your ear when you need me. Do try to bring something back in one piece.”

“This is it?” 009 questioned.

“Quite. Go on, you’re plane takes off in two hours, better hurry.”

“Yeah, er, right…” 009 said before leaving Q behind. As soon as the doors closed a young tech walked up to Q.

“I have only two questions for you. How did you do that? And… Can you teach me?”

“Genetic and I might be able to.”

“They pick on us, the double-os.”

“Do they?”

“Like to see people squirm, I think.” R agreed from across the room.

“I’ll definitely teach you then.” Q grinned. He had thoroughly enjoyed watching 009 squirm. 

800Q8

When 009 returned a week later, he came back with a tin of Earl Grey and his earpiece. “Back safely, I presume. Did anything else survive?”

“The gun’s a bit…broken and the radio was smashed.”

“Lovely.”

“But I brought you tea.”

“Yes, M will be pleased. ‘I have to spend quite a bit more money on tech, M, but I have tea’.” Q snarked. “At least I’ll have something to drink during overtime. How did you know I liked Earl Grey?”

“You smell like it.”

“Ah…most people don’t notice those things.”

“I’m an agent, Q.”

“I noticed.” Q said, putting 009’s things in a box to be dealt with later. “You can go, I’m sure M and medical would like to see you.” 009 started for the door and paused to look back at Q.

“Q?”

“Yes?”

“Not bad…for a kid.”

“Not going to have trouble from you any more then?”

“Oh, loads of it. I’m a double-o, Q, trouble is my job.” 009 commented before he left the room quickly. R appeared quickly after him.

“You just won over a double-o in one mission. Q, you aren’t going to have a single problem fitting in...”

“Don’t speak too soon. I have eight other double-os to win over.”

“Honey, it’ll be cake to you.”

800Q8

Q felt like he was being watched, but didn’t look over his shoulder, he was far too busy for that, and he knew it was likely just someone from the branch glaring at him for working too late…as usual. He continued to type, trying to pull the last of the system into the new decade, even with its kicking and screaming. The old Q had _really_ been terribly old-fashioned. “So, you’re the new Quartermaster?” Q didn’t jump or turn around, he just took a sip of his tea.

“Yes.” Q said, finishing the final string of code before he turned around. Q had never met 005, but he had read his file—as with all of the double-os. He was Tiago Rodriguez, thirty, and extremely gifted with computers, in spite of his position in the field. Q held out his hand and Tiago took it. Of the five double-os Q had met (as Q), 005 was the first to great him like a civilized person. 009 had ended up on the floor, 001 had tried to startle Q, 003 had tried to seduce him, and 004 had belittled him from the moment she put her eyes on Q.

“Your work is remarkable, Quartermaster.” 005 smiled gently, letting go of Q’s hand and looking at the code. “I watched you work, it’s impressive.”

“I am pretty adept with computers.”

“Don’t be modest, I’ve never seen work this good before.”

“That’s because there isn’t any.” Q shrugged.

“There you go, be confident, you _are_ the best. Why do you seem tense?”

“I’m waiting for you to attack me.”

“Attack you? Q, I don’t care that you are still a teenager or that you can’t drive or drink or anything of that nature. I care that your work is good and that you’re loyal. You are, so why am I going to try to test you?”

“You’re the most sane double-o I’ve met, thus far.”

“Oh, I’m hardly sane. I’m just the logical one.” 005 chuckled. “009 spoke highly of you, if the old man likes you you’re in. Doesn’t mean we’ll stop giving you hell, but if it makes you feel any better, you’ve got a few unlikely and very powerful friends. Not many teenagers can say as much…but then again, you’ve had powerful friends your whole life, haven’t you?”

“You hacked me.” Q said, raising an eyebrow.

“Oh no, not you, that would be impractical and damn near impossible. You’re father, John, is the one I hacked. I thought you looked like a certain consulting detective.”

“I’ll have to work on their laptops then.”

“Yes, you should. Everything else attached to your name has vanished…nothing squeals like a parent with family photos though.”

“They didn’t get me here to this job.”

“No you got yourself arrested…” 005 chuckled. “Don’t worry, you won’t have resistance out of me. You should worry about the two double-os that follow me. 006 and 007 will not take you seriously, at all.”

“They can do that. It’s their neck at stake, not mine.”

“You’ll fit in just fine, kid.” 005 smirked, patting Q’s shoulder in the manly ‘I approve of you’ manner.

“That wasn’t patronizing at all.”

“I’m a double-o, it could have been much worse, kiddo.” 005 started to walk away.

“Don’t hack my parents any longer. They’re both paranoid as hell already.”

“Oh, don’t worry. I would never want to get on the bad side of either of them. They’d be hell to deal with. Don’t know how you lived as long as you have.”

“Me neither…” Q sighed as 005 slipped out of the branch silently.

800Q8

James Bond was the rookie of the double-os, but that didn’t mean that he didn’t already have a name for himself. As a junior agent he’d made a name for himself. Q didn’t meet James in person, not before he spoke to him over coms, which left Q at a very severe disadvantage against the agent.  

“Checking in, sir?”

“Yes, but it’s a spur of the moment thing, I didn’t make a reservation.” James smiled, flirting with his eyes and body language at the receptionist.

“We have a bay view suite…” She smiled up at him.

“Perfect.” James smiled handing over his card. “And can you do me a favor? I was here for dinner last night and I parked my car next to a beautiful 1964 Aston Martin, and I’m ashamed to say I nicked the door… You wouldn’t happen to know who—”

“Mr. Dimitrios…” She answered instantly, she leaned forward. “If he hasn’t noticed, I’m not sure I’d mention it. Isn’t the type to take bad news well.”

“But if I felt compelled to find him?”

“He has a home just up the beach. But I have good news for you.” She smiled handing back his card.

“Do you?” He asked smoothly.

“Someone’s already paid for the bay view suite for you: suite 119.”

“Have they?” James asked, voice going a little colder. “Did they say anything?”

“Just: ‘Stay out of trouble. -Q.’”

James had never met the new Quartermaster, but he didn’t know whether to be impressed or annoyed with the boffin.

800Q8

“He’s in the Bahamas.” Q said, over the phone to M.

“ _You woke me to share his holiday plans? I know you’re new Q, but this is hardly—”_

“He’s logged into our secure website, using your name and password. Thought you’d be interested in _that_ at least. He’s quite clever for a blunt instrument.”

“ _How in the_ hell _does he know these things?!”_ M demanded.

“Doesn’t take much if you know where to look, ma’am, you’re older—no offense—so you keep your password at arm’s length so you can never forget it, obviously that’s how he figured it out. I could tell you what yours is without touching a keyboard.” Q answered, looking at his screen.

_“Who is he looking at?”_

“Alex Dimitrios.”

 _“_ That _slimy bugger? Why?”_

“Now, he’s looking at known associates.”

“… _Le Chiffre… Q_?”

“Yes, ma’am?”

 _“First off, why in the_ hell _are you still at work?_ ”

“I’m not, I’m at the house you pulled me out of. I’m home.”

_“I do hope you updated your security.”_

“Majorly, now that I have the budget for it.” Q responded truthfully.

_“Why are you watching Bond’s movements?”_

“I wasn’t, I have an alarm set so if anything curious happens within anything MI5 or MI6 I’m woken immediately. You signing in from the Bahamas was a bit curious.”

“ _Very clever of you… Let him do whatever he’s up to for now…just keep me updated.”_

“Yes, ma’am.”

_“And do sleep, you unnerve me with how little you sleep. Aren’t teenagers supposed to sleep more?”_

“And there’s the age card again.” Q sighed.

_“It’s a valid point, Q…get some rest.”_

“Yes, ma’am.” Q said, hanging up on her before he typed a few, final things and closed his laptop. He shut off his light, slipped off his glasses, and closed his eyes, resting against his pillow.

800Q8

“This is—” Q started but he was interrupted.

 _“It’s Bond for_ her _. Now!”_ Q quickly transferred him over, opening a line between himself, M, and Bond.

“M, I’ve tracked him, he’s at a Miami airport.” Q told her as she ripped her phone up.

“Do you have any idea—!?” M started, but heard the panic in the background. “Q what’s happening?” She asked, looking at him through the camera on her computer.

“Alarms. Fire alarm was pulled.” Q commented. “007 is in pursuit of someone. I can’t tell who. I’m using facial recognition and cross-referencing to see who it might be, hard to do in the panic though.”

“Figure it out, Q.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Bond? Bond! Put the bloody phone to your ear and tell me what the hell is going on?”

“ _Fire alarms have been triggered…something’s wrong, there’s no target here.”_

“What do you mean there’s no target? It’s an airport, that is a target!”

“Wait!” Q called.

“Yes, Q?” M asked.

“While looking through the faces for possible targets I found something else worth mentioning.”

“Spit it out.”

“The Boeing 777 prototype, the largest airplane in the world. It’s being unveiled today. That’s the target.”

“Bond, the target is the Boeing 777.” M relayed quickly before the phone line went dead.

“M, this is going to be bloody.”

“Gather your things, Q, along with a tracker, you’re coming with me.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“And Q?”

“Yes?”

“Bring some bloody suntan lotion, you’ll fry otherwise.” Q rolled his eyes. She was worse than Mrs. Hudson sometimes.

“Yes, ma’am.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love


	4. Something’s Wrong

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q meets James.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's late... I didn't have internet.

Something’s Wrong

 

Q walked through the jail simply, not looking at anyone as he walked by—not even the one who blew kisses at him, though it was tempting to turn back and break his nose. He stopped in front of the cell with the infamous James Bond inside. He looked completely relaxed, leaning lazily against the wall from where he sat, cuts and bruises marring his skin.  The police officer unlocked and opened the door. “Thank you, sir.” Q nodded to him, he huffed and walked away.

“Damn brits.” He muttered as he walked off. Q barely kept from rolling his eyes.

“Get up, 007.” Q ordered.

“And who are you?” James asked, standing and narrowing his eyes at Q. Q felt like he was being pierced…the only thing he could compare James’ gaze to was his uncle Mycroft’s gaze. It was simply something you couldn’t move away from.

“I’m your new Quartermaster. M, told me to fetch you.”

“You _must_ be joking.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re a child.” James said, stepping forward. Most would have been intimidated, being stared down by an assassin with such a piercing gaze, but Q's eyes didn't leave his and he answered in an almost bored, calm tone.

“Age is no guarantee of efficacy.”

“And youth is no guarantee of innovation.”

“We’ll see about that.” Q said not letting his eyes stray from the agent's. “Now, let’s go, M doesn’t like to be kept waiting.”

“And do you always do what your mother tells you?”

“I don’t have a mother.”

“M always did have a soft spot for orphans.”

Q let him think that as he led James out of the prison and to the car. The ride was a quiet tense one, with James analyzing everything about Q. Q didn’t give him the pleasure of even acting affected by it. It made James both angry and intrigued.

800Q8

“Quite the body count you’re stacking up.” M said, looking at James. “She was tortured first. As you’d already killed her husband she must have been the only one left to question. Did she know anything that could compromise you?” She asked nodding towards the dead body in the middle of the crime scene.

“No.”

“Not your name, what you were after…?”

“No…” He said before turning his back on the scene and following M. She led him into a secluded area before talking to him. “Dimitrios worked as a middle man, always knew how to put his hands on weapons and people who could use them. Worked with anyone who had the money. For years he was tied to a man we knew as Le Chiffre; private banker to terrorists and organized crime. He invested their money and gave them access to it wherever they needed it. Saddam took a disliking to him after Desert Storm and cut off his head.” M said before looking past James at Q. “Oh, good, you’re back. How did it go?”

“Got all the information I needed. It was absolutely, dreadfully, simple.” Q nodded simply, towards his laptop that was in the messenger bag he had over his shoulder.

“Ah, the child again.”

“I’m your superior, if you need reminding.” Q said, raising an eyebrow. “Roll up your sleeve.” Q ordered as he opened the case. He pulled out a gun-like object and filling the chamber with something small. James raised an eyebrow at him. Q grabbed his arm and rolled the sleeve up himself before forcing the arm to turn over.

“Albanian, we believe. Chess prodigy, bit off a mathematical genius—” Q looked over at M and raised an eyebrow.

“Genius by whose standards?” Q scoffed. M ignored him.

“Liked to prove it by playing poker.” She continued as Q put the gun to James’ skin and pulled the trigger.

“Ow.” James said sarcastically.

“Do grow up, 007.”

“Says the boy who can’t grow facial hair.” James snapped before he turned to M. “Is this so you can keep track of me?”

“Yes.” M nodded. “Q, anything else?”

“Could I add a small explosive to this tracker? I believe it would make both of our lives easier, no?” Q asked, running his phone over the spot in James’ arm. It glowed green under James’ skin for one second before blinking twice and going dark. Q looked at his phone, looking over the numbers that were running through it.

“I wish.” M agreed.

“I could do it quite easily, perhaps in the next modification.” Q smiled at her cheekily. M chuckled. “The numbers are good, it all works out and is reading everything properly. I’ll be heading back now, to make sure everything is secure. Is there anything else you may need of me?”

“No, thank you, Q.” M nodded as Q walked away. “You will be more respectful to him 007. He’s a good Quartermaster.”

“He’s a _child_.”

“The two coincide at this point in time and he’s older in spirit... Keep your comments to yourself. I want to keep him.”

“If I can scare him away he isn’t worth keeping.”

“Oh, 007, you cannot scare that one away. He’s been through nearly more than you have, and also happens to have more kills on his file than you. So do keep that in mind.” M commented before she continued discussing his new mission parameters.

800Q8

James searched for Q’s file, but kept coming up with nothing, nothing except for a page full of redacted information that he could not access no matter how hard he tried.

_ Don’t bother, 007. _

James froze, looking at the words.

_ Don’t you have a mission to be getting on with? _

Q was, at the very least, a clever child.

_ Stop looking for answers you won’t find. If 005 can’t find them, you can’t. _

_So others have tried...?_

_ Don’t think you’re the only one who likes to hack in their spare time, 007. _

_M said you had more kills than I did._

_Go back to your job, 007, some of us occasionally sleep, especially after long plane rides._

_You didn’t answer._ James responded, waiting. It was a minute and a half before there was a response.

_I do. _

_ Stop snooping, 007. _

James’ eyes widened before his whole laptop shut off. Q had shut it off remotely. “Not bad for a child.” James closed his laptop as the door to the train car opened and a woman slipped inside. She slowly walked down the aisle and sat across from him.

“I’m the money.”

“Every penny of it.” James smiled charmingly as she slid over a business card.

“The Treasury has agreed to stake you in the game.”

“’Vesper’? I hope you gave your parents hell for that.”

800Q8

“M, I don’t like this.” Q said, standing in her office.

“Don’t like what, this time, Q?” M sighed. Often his concerns were understandable and always spot-on, but she was starting to hate that he brought them all to her.

“An accountant in the field? Don’t you feel there’s something wrong with that?”

“The Treasury likes to make sure their money is in good hands and if that means sending one of their own in, so be it.”

“But something doesn’t _feel_ right.”

“Why do you bring these feelings to me, Q?”

“Because something needs to be done about them.” Q insisted.

“Well then do something about them, and quit showing up in here all the damn time. Show some bloody confidence about your genius, won’t you?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Now go before I have Tanner drag you out.”

“Tanner wouldn’t do that, he likes me like the little brother he never had. He leaves sweets in my desk.” Q grinned.

“You are winning over a dangerous portion of MI6, should I be worried about the trouble your charm will get you into?”

“Not yet.” Q teased.

“And why do I keep getting bloody memo’s from ‘Minions’?”

“That’s not my doing, it’s merely a side-effect of my…awesomeness.”

“And?” M wondered.

“The techs in Q-Branch have nominated me their Supreme Overlord and have deemed it necessary to refer to themselves in a collective. They’ve deemed themselves to be my ‘Minions’.” M looked at Q as though he’d sprouted another head.

“Whatever, just…keep them in line.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“And Q?”

“Yes.”

“If you think there’s something wrong, look into it. I’m not here to baby sit you. I realize you’re used to people hovering over your shoulder, analyzing everything you do, but I’m not and I don’t want to. I’m not Mycroft Holmes.”

“I don’t suppose anyone but _him_ is.”

“Go on, do whatever you deem necessary, just don’t get caught looking too deeply, our own people don’t much like it when we delve into their business.”

“I’d never get caught, ma’am.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	5. Your Youth is No Guarantee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felix, poison, Vesper, James, and John.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title Chapter. :D

Your Youth is No Guarantee

 

James glared at the phone when it rang, but dutifully picked it up. “Bond.”

_“Thank you for finally answering, 007, this is Q. Are you alone?”_

“Bit young to be wanting to get me on my own, isn’t that illegal for those your age?” James sniped back.

“ _Stop, just because you’ve had to kill two people in the last few hours does not mean you can take it out on me. I’m_ helping _you. I need to know if I can trust you to keep a secret and an even better poker face.”_

“You’re asking _me_ that?”

“ _Have to be sure. I’m sending you files on Vesper Lynd before this goes tits up. Do what you will with what I’ve found…but if I were you I would play off it and use it to our advantage. She doth protest too much, I think.”_

“You’ve been watching us.”

_“I never stop watching.”_

“A voyeur then.”

 _“It_ is _in my job description, yes. Mathis has the bodies covered…keep playing a good game…and if she dupes you, you kind of have to fall for it. Make sure your acting is flawless.”_

“Is it ever not?”

The line went dead.

James rolled his eyes and opened his laptop, reading through the files quickly. His eyes widened slightly and everything started to make so much more sense. Vesper wasn’t as innocent as she seemed.

800Q8

Q quickly dialed another number. “ _Hello?”_

“Is this Felix Leiter?” Q asked.

_“Who is this?”_

“A friend from MI6.”

 _“Ah, so that’s_ your _boy sitting down the table from me.”_

“Yes, it is.”

_“How did you get my number?”_

“MI6 is not in the habit of hiring idiots. I need you to do a little negotiating for me. We’re going to have to work together on this one.”

 _“What do you need from me, my friend?”_ Felix asked.

“I need you to talk to your people, our player will likely need to be staked, as the Treasury here won’t budge, though I’ve tried to use my persuasive powers—unfortunately if I used any of my other powers I’d probably just upset them. I need your country to do it should it become an eventuality.”

_“What would we get in return?”_

“You can take Le Chiffre down and we’ll help, just need a bit of money to snare him. No offense—but our man’s a better player than you are.”

_“None taken and we don’t need the money Mr…?”_

“Q. My name’s Q. And thank you, very much, Mr. Leiter.”

“ _Not a problem.”_ Q ended the call easily before switching to another.

“Yes, 003, I’m back and I have those blueprints. I need you to go right.”

“ _There are people there, Q_.”

“You’re going to have to trust me on this one, 003.”

_“Fine kiddo…tell me where to go.”_

“Go into the door on your right and be ready to climb…”

800Q8

“Get the girl out.” James snapped as he walked passed Mathis, not sticking around long enough to hear his protests, following after Le Chiffre with a knife clenched in his hand, hidden behind his arm. An arm caught him. “Bad break, I thought you had him.” Felix whispered. “Never really introduced myself: Felix Leiter from Langley.” James paused to look at him with his eyebrows pulled together. “You should have a little faith, I’ve been watching you play. Forgetting that one unlucky hand, I think you have him.”

“Had. Now if you’ll excuse me.”

“You’re not buying in?” Felix raised an eyebrow and James glared at him. “Listen, I’m bleeding chips, I’m not going to last much longer. And your friend Q’s good with negotiation.”

“Q?” James asked quietly. “He made contact with you?”

“It’s seems he’s quite a clever man.”

 _Child._ James corrected.

“We’ll stake you the money to keep going, you can beat him. Just one thing, if you pull it off, the CIA get to bring him in.”

“And the winnings?”

“Does it look like we need the money?” Felix asked with a smile, holding out his hand for the blade. James put it on the table next to him before walking on.

Q was a manipulative little bastard, but, then again, he knew that there were betrayals at every turn…he was quite a prepared Quartermaster…James had to give the kid that.

800Q8

“Q! Bond’s been poisoned.” A minion shouted up at him. “He’s going into cardiac arrest.”

“On it!” Q shouted back, looking through the sensor readings quickly before hearing 007 call in to him. “007, it’s Q.”

“ _I_ _need a doctor_.”

“Just trust me on this and don’t interrupt me or you’ll be dead within two minutes if you don’t do as I say.”

“ _I’m all ears_.”

“There’s a defibrillator in the pouch, get it out and start attaching the leads to your chest.” Q ordered. _Ventricular tachycardia… Digitalis… He needs something, what is it, what is it, think think think_! Q had to get the information out while the agent still had time, still had a consciousness to work with. “Bond grab the blue combipen, mid-neck, into the artery. Then you have to press the red button.” Q waited a minute. “007?” Q saw a sudden spike in James’ heart rate and breathed out slowly. “Alright?”

_“Feel like hell, Q.”_

“Quit bellyaching, you’re alive, 007.”

“ _Thank you, Q_.” James breathed quietly.

“You’re welcome. I doubt you’re going to a hospital, so take the red combipen with you.”

“ _When do I use it_?”

“Trust me, you’ll know.” Q nodded. “Do try not to get poisoned again, 007.”

 _“Will do.”_ James answered before the line went dead.

“How in the hell did you know that?” A minion asked, looking up at him with wide eyes.

He almost answered that his papa had taught him everything he knew about medicine, but he didn’t. “Think I only studied computers? That would have been _boring_.” Q shrugged.

“Very calm under pressure.” The minion smiled in admiration.

“I try.” Q shrugged before nodding to all of them. “Get back to work, we have missions to be monitoring.”

800Q8

It was a long while before James strode into Q-Branch, but he came back bringing a box full of items. “Q’s upstairs in his office.” R nodded to James before going about her business. James walked up the stairs quickly and didn’t bother knocking on the door.

“Yes, just come right in, I’m not busy doing my _job_ or anything. Would it kill you to knock, 007?” Q asked, not looking up from what he was working on.

“Possibly.” James answered before walking to Q’s desk. “Is Mathis alright?”

“He was startled when I had him kidnapped, but he got over it once I explained things to him. We had to be very convincing, which meant I couldn’t warn him beforehand. Your acting was superb.”

“Thank you.” James smirked. “Vesper’s phone.”

“Thank goodness, I need something more to do.” Q smiled genuinely when he took it from him, their fingertips brushing as he did.

“I thought you said you were busy.”

“I am, but I don’t sleep much, gives me something to do when everyone’s gone home and I’m waiting for 004 to get into touch. I get bored.” Q shrugged. “I’ll find everything I can on it, should be simple.”

“You saved my life. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, Bond.”

“You’re not half-bad for a spotty kid.” James conceded.

 _Spotty?_ Q instantly wondered if he had acne. Did he? He couldn’t remember the last time he looked in a mirror. He didn’t give his vain concerns away as he spoke. “Is that you’re way of accepting me into the group, because you’re the last double-o on the non-approval list.”

“Do you care much about that?”

“No, but _you_ should. I have no qualms with making your life difficult if you make mine difficult.” James smirked at the boffin.

“Oh I’ll still make your life hell, I’m a double-o.”

“That’s what the others said.” Q shrugged. “I don’t expect perfection, but I won’t take belittlement from any of you. I’ve made it quite clear that I deserve my place here.”

“Yes…you have. What’s left of my kit’s in the box.” James nodded, heading for the door. He paused at the door and looked back at the young man at the desk. “Hey, kid?”

“Hm?”

“This world is dangerous… Your youth is no guarantee that you’ll survive it.” James warned him.

“I know.” Q nodded, his voice a little more solemn. “But I’m doing well so far, aren’t I?”

“So far,” James nodded before he left the office. Q looked at the box and chuckled to himself. Everyone thought the double-os had no hearts, but every single one of them had warned Q in some fashion…had shown themselves as being protective of him. Each of them had their own way about it, but Q knew, quite obviously, that the double-os had a soft spot for him and were all extremely protective of him—after, of course, they deemed him as competent.

Q opened the box and frowned. There was nothing remaining of the kit but a few scraps of metal. “I’m going to kill him before my career’s done.”

“Who, 007?” R asked, stepping into the office. “Can I help?”

“Yes, and then we can run away together, destroying the world as we go.”

“Anything you say, Overlord.” R chuckled. “We would make great rulers of this world.”

“Yes…but I think it would get boring after a while, besides, I don’t have a good evil laugh.”

“Or a moustache to twirl.”

“Oh, shut it with the age jokes.”

“Don’t disrespect your elder, Q!” R teased and then chuckled. “I still think you’d make a wonderful villain.”

“I’d get bored. Tea, please?”

“Of course.” R chuckled, leaving the boffin alone.

800Q8

“Dad, Papa?” Q called out quietly walking into 221B. He froze when he saw the picture of himself next to the shot-up smiley face. He felt years older than the man in the picture, when really it had been less than a year since it was taken.

“Hamish?” John asked, coming down the stairs and pulling Q into a hug instantly. “How’s everything going?”

“Well enough.” Q smiled shyly. “Dad gone?”

“Off chasing someone down. He didn’t need me this time.” John shrugged, sitting down in his chair as Q sat down on the sofa. “You’re having trouble with death, aren’t you?”

“I shouldn’t care…they are enemies… I shouldn’t care.”

“But you do…it’s what makes you human, ‘Mish, it’s why you’ve got such a good heart.”

“I don’t think any Holmes should be in possession of a heart, not a fully functioning one at least.”

“You’re a Watson too, you know.”

“I know…just… It hurts. I can’t rationalize it all away.”

“’Mish…you’ll be alright… I’d be worried about you if you didn’t care.”

“Then I’d be Moriarty.”

“Pretty much.” John nodded. “Your heart is what makes you good…yes, it hurts, but…what would we be if we didn’t hurt?”

“How did dad live when he found his heart after all those years? I can’t imagine not growing up like this and then suddenly feeling everything.”

“I held on tight to him and smacked him around a bit when he got out of control.” John chuckled. “You’ll be alright, Hamish, one thing I’ve learned is that the Holmes boys are all impossibly brilliant an unendingly strong.”

“So’s the Watson side of the family…at least one of them that I know.” Q smiled.

“Ta… Would you like some tea?”

“I’d love some.”

“Earl?”

“It’s one of those days…” Q nodded in agreement, smiling after his father as he walked into the kitchen. There wasn’t a Holmes or Watson in the world who’d grown up slow, Hamish was no exception to the rule.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	6. 009 Started It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the double-os take turns beating Q up. Literally.

009 Started It

 

Q was, honestly, just walking through the weight room when he spotted Tiago struggling. He’d been shot in the shoulder and had been desperately trying to get his strength back, but he was certainly going to drop the weights on himself when his shoulder decided to give out. “Whoa.” Q managed to catch the weights and help Tiago put them up.

“That was some quick reflexes kiddo, thanks.” He said sitting up, rubbing his shoulder.

“Not a problem. Adrenalin does wonderful things.” Q said. “I’m not the muscly, weight-lifting sort.”

“I can see that kiddo.” Tiago teased lightly, punching Q’s arm playfully with his uninjured arm. “Be that as it is, I heard you put 009 on his ass.” He grinned, nodding towards the older man who scowled back.

“It was a reflex.”

“Some reflexes kid. Who taught you self-defense?”

“My father.” Q answered.

“He’s good.”

“I’m not as good, if I attack first I can handle most things, but I have to be quick or strength gets me in the end.”

“Doesn’t always have to.” 009 commented from behind. “I mean you’ve obviously learned some martial arts in your life, judging by the takedown you used, you’ve got more brains than most of your opponents as well. You may not be physically intimidating—”

“Thanks, 009.” Q snarked.

“Kiddo, you’re a twig, face it.” Tiago chuckled.

“I’m lean.” Q defended himself.

“No, James is built lean, you are scrawny. There is a huge difference.” 009 told him, matter-of-factly. “You can always get stronger, but the thing you have to work on is defense, not offense. You never know, you could—possibly—grow up more, but for now defense is your best shot. You may not be as strong, but you’ve got brains, fighting knowledge, and speed on most people, so that’s a plus.”

“It doesn’t matter if they get a single blow in I’m done.”

“Then don’t let them.” 009 said simply. “Come on, let me show you.”

“Now?”

“Do you have a better time? It’s not like anyone’s dying, most of the double-os are actually in MI6 right now, so you’re not too busy.”

“You act as though I’m just your butler, I do have a branch to run, you know.”

“They can survive without you, come over here.” 009 said, leading him over to the mats.

“You’re going to kill me for embarrassing you aren’t you?”

“Only a little bit.” 009 shrugged.

“If you leave more than a bruise on him you will be killed by the rest of us, Jason.” Tiago warned seriously. There wasn’t a single double-o who wouldn’t destroy the world for Q with a smile on their face.

“Hurt him? Are you kidding me? He’s too adorable.” 009 smirked. “Get that idiotic cardigan off. Who dresses you anyway, your grandfather?”

“I prefer jumpers, but they aren’t ‘professional wear’ according to M, I got as close as I could without driving her mad enough to kill me or worse.” Q shrugged.

“Off, and if you’ve got an under shirt on take off that button-up as well.”

“Do I have to?”

“Do you have to act like a child?” 009 retorted.

“Ha! You lot are more childish than I am.” Q scoffed, pulling off his cardigan and jacket.

“Holy hell.” Tiago shook his head.

“What?” Q asked.

“I can count your ribs through that shirt.” Tiago shook his head and sat in the corner of the room. “Remind me to bring you food whenever I’m around.”

“I don’t need feeding up.” Q glared at the agent. Mrs. Hudson had tried for years. Q just had a very high metabolism. He ate more than most did and still didn’t gain weight. Then again, he didn’t always have the time to go and get food when he was working. “But chocolates, Earl Grey, and Thai never go amiss if you’re going to try it—sweets in general are good. If they’re good enough I accept bribes.”

“Dually noted, Quartermaster.” Tiago chuckled.

“Okay, so your job is to focus on speed and defense, nothing else right now. Got it?” 009 asked.

“I suppose so.”

“Don’t worry, kiddo, I won’t kill you…at first.”

“Thanks.” 009 charged Q. Q feinted to the left and in a move too quick for 009 to defend himself from he was flat on his back. He swept Q’s feet out from underneath him in retaliation. 009 rolled on top of the Quartermaster and pressed a blade to his throat, hidden in his sleeve.

“You have to keep moving, Q.” 009 told him before sliding the knife away. “You could have been dead.”

“Great.” Q sighed before moving again, a quick and effective scissor sweep before moving into a choke to keep 009 from throwing him off.

“Ooh, Brazilian Ju-Jitsu? How long have you studied that, Q?”

“Not long.”

“That was pretty good.” 009 chuckled. “What happens if I start fighting back?”

“I don’t know…let’s find out.” The pair of them grappled for several moments. 009 had the upper hand, but Q was skilled and could keep up with him.

“Alright, kiddo, you’re proficient and very quick on your feet, but most people won’t fight honorably like that.” 009 said, tapping Q’s shoulder. The two of them untangled themselves easily and 009 offered Q a hand up. “Alright, use what you obviously know and your speed to try to keep me off of you as long as possible.”

“Can I knock you out?” Tiago snorted in the corner. “No, it’s a valid question. If I find that I’m able to do it, can I?”

“As long as there are no lasting side-effects, you seem like the type to carry poisons around.” 009 shrugged. “Whenever you’re ready.” He nodded to Q. Q looked him up and down, scanning for all the weak points in human anatomy and calculating all of the double-os personal weak spots based on his stance (and his own knowledge of past missions). 009 didn’t like the way that Q looked at him, the eyes spoke of someone who’d fought before, who’d killed, and who still knew how to do it. It wasn’t that 009 was afraid of Q, no, even if Q had been killing people since he was little 009 still had more time as a double-o that Q did living. It was that Q had been in that position that bothered him…he was just a kid, a kid like all the ones 009 tried so hard to save and shelter from such harsh lives.

Q had a past, even though his file didn’t say anything not a single, damn word to shed any light on his history.

All of the double-os had checked.

But, then again, everyone in MI6 had a history.

Q got three good jabs in before 009 had him pinned to the ground.

“You can take a hit, Q…” 009 smiled. “Again.” He said, pulling Q to his feet.

“You get some sort of sick pleasure out of this don’t you?”

“A young pup decides to put me on my ass the first day we met and then I get an opportunity to beat the hell out of him… I think I do.” 009 admitted without regret.

“Do keep in mind that I can make your life hell.” Q reminded him.

“Oh, but you won’t, kiddo, I’m your favorite.”

“No, obviously I am.” Tiago piped up.

“I don’t have favorites and if I did, 002 would be it.” Both agents looked at him, looking like kicked puppies. “What? He brings me snacks, and brings all of the equipment back in one piece.” Q shrugged.

“I bring my equipment back.” Tiago frowned. “And don’t talk about that one time. It was just a radio.”

“Sorry, 002’s got a better record than you.”

“Lovely distraction, time to go again Q.” 009 told him.

009 and Q sparred for a while—009 stopping every few minutes to show Q how to get away from things, what to do and how to do it better than most. Most of the agents in MI6 had come down to watch and add to the teachings. By the time the 009 was done with the lesson, they’d all agreed that these self-defense lessons were going to be a ‘thing’ until they all felt comfortable with Q’s abilities.

800Q8

“Come on, Q, you can do better than that.” James smirked from above him, holding the smaller man down. “Didn’t you say you had Ju-Jitsu somewhere in there? Come on, I could have had you dead sixteen different ways by now.”

“Fuck you.”

“Language, kiddo.” 009 warned from his perch in one of the work-out room windows. Q managed to switch their positions, but only for a moment before James had thrown him in a different direction, Q struggled for a minute before tapping James’ arm.

“Alright…” James sighed, standing up. “Try again.” Q made a valiant effort but ended up slammed against the ground harshly.

“Dear God, James…do you have to be so rough on him?” 009 asked worriedly. “I could hear his brain rattle in his head. You realize he’s the one who watches your ass right?”

“I’m fine.” Q grunted out.

“What in the hell is going on?” James was instantly on his feet, leaving Q in a sweaty heap on the ground with M and Tanner staring at both of them.

“009 started it.” James said instantly, turning to help Q up. 009 hopped off the window sill and rubbed the back of his neck.

“Thanks James…” He glared at the younger agent before looking at M sheepishly. “Um, self-defense lessons… I mean, he’s very good but…we were worried about you know…more professional assassins coming after him…and…well we wanted him to be prepared.” M looked at the three of them before her eyes settled on Q.

“You do look a little less frail. How long’s this been going on?”

“Two months.”

“I’m fine with it, as long as his head doesn’t hit the ground that hard again. I _do_ need what’s in there, you know.”

“Sorry, M.” James smirked, not looking very apologetic.

“Glad you aren’t taking it easy on him though, the real world won’t. Continue.” M said, continuing with Tanner through the room and out of the doors.

009 let out a sigh in relief. “Well, she didn’t kill any of us.”

“She doesn’t scare me all that much.” Q shrugged, reaching for a towel to clean his forehead.

“Really?” James asked.

“Really… I’ve met more frightening people.”

“Is that how you’ve got those kills on your file?” James questioned.

“What kills?” 009 asked.

“M said he had kills on his file, at least seven at the time she said it too.” Q shifted uncomfortably.

“Leave it alone, James.” Tiago warned in a low voice, coming to Q’s side in defense instantly. Even for a Watson-Holmes, staring down two double-os looking for answers could be intimidating.

“Where did you come from, kiddo?” 009 wondered curiously.

“Can we not do this now?” Q asked. “Or ever?”

“Aw, you’re so cute when you act like the teenager you are.” 009 ruffled his hair. “It’s alright. We’ve all got history. You don’t see me talking about mine.”

“But you do.” Q said looking 009 up and down. “I can see it plain as day.”

“If you use your magic trick on me I’ll strangle you.” 009 warned.

“I won’t say anything aloud. Promise.”

“Good.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	7. Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two men give Q their jackets. Smoking, mistletoe, drinking, and realizations...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And all the tension you can chew on if you want to believe some of the older double-os.

Christmas

 

The party was in full swing, but the Quartermaster was missing. Tiago was the one who found him, standing on a balcony, smoking, alone. “Are you old enough to be smoking those?”

“Fuck off, 005.” Q responded simply.

“Well you certainly aren’t old enough to buy them.”

“I know a few people who owe me favors.” Q shrugged, he was like his father in that manner, he collected favors. And apparently he did not caring that it was freezing. He wasn’t even wearing his normal jacket.

“You realize those will kill you, don’t you?” Tiago asked, pulling off his jacket and slipping it over his shoulders. It wasn’t a romantic gesture in the slightest, but a familial one. Q was the sweet, annoying, genius kid brother Tiago never had…he wasn’t letting him get pneumonia.

“I _am_ a genius, and by my calculations I’ll die in the line of duty long before I’ll die of these damn things.” Q shrugged, slowly letting out a long breath. “Want one?” He offered freely. Tiago smiled and took one, lighting it and taking a drag before leaning on the railing next to the boy.

“Rough week, then?”

“002 will still be in critical condition, likely he will continue to be in that condition for a week, if he lasts that long and 004 is still missing. Does that qualify?”

“I suppose so, Q.” Tiago nodded. “You aren’t a normal smoker are you?”

“Saying I can’t handle it?”

“No, these are good cigarettes and you don’t cough or choke… No, you smoke well, but not often. It isn’t a new habit though. You were very underage when you started. However, the way you savor each breath means it’s a treat. You’re not addicted, you use it only during stressful situations. Is it because it reminds you of your father or because it calms you down?”

“Both, and you knowing so much about my family creeps me out.” Q commented.

“If it makes you feel better their security is now air-tight. You’re lucky to not be addicted.”

“I’m rather resilient to addictions, unlike my father. I suppose you’d have to not count my addiction to technology though.” Q stamped the stub of a cigarette out under his toe and stared out over the city. “It calms me down, should do the opposite, but…no one in my family does anything the right way around. It's...like going home...being safe, even if my body thinks otherwise.”

“Are you going to be alright?” Tiago asked after a few moments of silence. The answer came in the flick of a lighter and a new cigarette lighting.

“I will be.”

“Is that because you will be or because you have to be?”

“The latter. I’m never truly alright when someone under my care is hurt…that’s my papa in me.”

“Kiddo, it’s not your fault.”

“If I have the ability to stop something, then it’s my fault. If I didn’t prepare for the eventualities, the results are my burden.”

“You’re a tough kid to comfort.”

“Because I’m not a kid.”

“I know, Q. Believe me, I know you’re not a child.” Tiago said. “You act, think, react, and speak and feel like an adult. That being said…kiddo. You’re still a kid and you can’t always take all the pain and keep it in.”

“All the double-os do it.”

“That’s because we’re fucked up, Q—and we _don’t._ We don’t keep it in. That’s why people get killed, that’s why we make mistakes, that’s why we drink so much. You can’t afford to keep it in Q. One of us has to be sane or things will get much worse.”

“I’m hardly sane.”

“No, but you have a heart and someone has to Q. You still have it, you still care… Bottling up the pain is only going to break it.”

“What am I supposed to do?”

“Not stand outside alone when nearly everyone you care about is inside being merry. You can’t spend all of your time sheltering everyone else from the horrors in the world, Q, sometimes you’ve got to let other people take care of you.” Tiago chuckled and rubbed his back. “You’re strong, kiddo, probably the strongest person I’ve met, but you’re not strong enough to hold onto all of our lives and it _will_ kill you to try it. So, smoke when you need to, but…make sure you’re not always alone when you shouldn’t be.”

“005…thank you.”

“I live to serve, Overlord.” He smirked and bowed a little. “I know we all come home and bitch at you about everything, but you realize we’d listen if you needed to talk, don’t you?” He asked simply. “Well, some of us. Alec would probably laugh more than necessary, but there’s always one wacky one in every family, isn’t there?” He chuckled before he left, going back inside. Q smiled and chuckled, shaking his head. He took the final drags from his cigarette before dropping it and flattening it. He pulled the jacket off of his shoulders and walked inside. He walked up to the bar and handed it to 005.

“Thank you.”

“Can’t have you getting a cold.” He nodded. “Want a drink?”

“No, I don’t drink, but thank you.”

“One drink.” 005 insisted reaching over the counter and grabbing a glass and a bottle before pouring Q a glass.

“Only one.”

“He’ll get you drunk yet.” 009 commented, sitting down next to Q. “Careful he might lace it with something.”

“Lovely.” Q sighed, taking a small sip and wincing. “You know if I wanted to drink rocket fuel, I’d go to Q-Branch.”

“Do the rest of it in one go, trust me. Even I wouldn’t drink that garbage. Tiago has very bad taste.”

“Do not.”

“Do too.” 009 rolled his eyes. “Here, this one’s better, you don’t want the rest of that.”

“I see what you’re doing, don’t think for a second you’re fooling me.” Q commented before he took a sip of 009’s drink. “Okay _that’s_ good.”

“I know.” He winked. “Have the rest of it.”

“No way in hell, it’s not worth it.”

“Why do you smell like smoke? Do I need to ground you or send you to your room or something?” 009 asked.

“I’d like to see you try.” Q scoffed.

“I’ll call mummy over here.” 009 said seriously.

“I’m not afraid of her.” Q shrugged.

“He really isn’t.” 005 agreed.

“You alright, kiddo?” 009 wondered after a moment.

“Yeah…I’m okay.”

“You know 002’s going to be alright.”

“I hope so.” Q sighed, taking another drink from 009’s glass.

“Want me to get you one?”

“No, I’m content with stealing from you.” Q chuckled. He looked out at the people and sighed. The distance between R and Alec really needed to change. They obviously liked each other.

“What are you plotting? That’s your plotting face.” 009 commented.

“R and 006.”

“Don’t I know it? I feel bad for James, all Alec does it bitch and moan about her while fawning over her.” 009 downed his glass and ordered two more, handing one to Q.

“You know, there’s mistletoe in the room.” 005 nodded over to a vacant spot in the room. “How do we get them under it?”

“I can get R.” Q nodded.

“James could wrangle Alec easily.” 009 nodded. “James!” He called out. Wherever James was, he appeared from thin air a second later. “Hey, want to stop Alec’s bitching?” James followed his eyes and nodded.

“Who’s got R?”

“Q’s got her.”

“Sounds like a plan. I’m tired of his shit. Come on kiddo.” Q downed his glass before they both walked away to their respective marks.

“What are you doing?” 005 asked as 009 fidgeted in his seat.

“Embarrassing Q.” 009 smiled, grabbing mistletoe and hanging it just outside their bubble of space.

“You’re funny. Fifty says they won’t _really_ kiss.”

“Unfair bet, I doubt Q’s ever even been kissed. James isn’t that much of an ass, you’re more of an ass than he is. Fifty says James scolds him for smoking.”

“I’ll take that one.” 005 nodded, waiting for the two of them to come back, both marks having been successfully lured into the trap. “Smooth, you two.” He smiled as they approached.

“Child’s play.” Q shrugged.

“Hopefully they go to _her_ place, not ours.” James commented, stepping up just enough.

“Oh look at that.” 009 smirked. James looked up, Q didn’t, he just glared at 009 knowing that smirk too well. “You two have to kiss.”

“I’ll kill you in your sleep.”

“Your heart is too big for that, kiddo, but nice try, kitten.”

“Where’s your sense of Christmas cheer, Q?” 005 asked. “If you can’t take a joke you shouldn’t be dishing them out, kiddo.”

James gently leaned down and pressed a kiss against Q’s cheek. Q had always known what James had smelt like, but he’d never been so surrounded by it. It was intoxicating, warm. The gun powder undertone reminded him of his papa, but the rest was uniquely James. Warm, intoxicating, manly perfection. Q wanted to lean in and smell more, but instead he planted a quick, simple, chaste kiss against his cheek before pulling away.

Fucking pheromones. Q hissed to himself before sitting down.

“Gentleman, please do remember to be specific when you trap people. Leaves a lot of room for interpretation.” James smiled. “You don’t need the youngest agent to tell you that. Also, Q, I know a good brand of cigarettes you might appreciate. I’ll pick up a pack next time I’m in the area.” 009 huffed angrily and handed 005 the money.

“Only if you bring it back with your equipment, 007, or else you’re of no use to me.” James smirked.

“Of course, Quartermaster, I’m only doing _all_ the work.”

“Ha! Hardly. I could do more damage on my laptop in an hour than you could do in a year in the field.” 009 and 005 looked at each other and raised they’re eyebrows in sync. Were those two always like that together? That was…interesting.

“Is that so?” James inquired skeptically.

“Damn straight it is. So you’d better fucking respect the tools I give you.”

“Whoa, whoa… Hey now. Q you’re not old enough to use grown-up words.” 009 commented. Q turned a glare on him that made the double-o wince back into his seat.

“Don’t forget who has power over you, 009. I can easily destroy everything about you _and then_ send you into the field with nothing but a toothpick and crazy glue.”

“Yes, don’t forget, Q’s the top in this relationship.” 005 winked. Q turned a brilliant shade of red and pulled 005’s chair out from under him with a swift move in his leg. The agent fell gracelessly to the ground.

“Yes, well, I’m quite sure I’ve reached my socializing limit for my life. I’m going home.”

“Awe…you’re no fun, get drunk for us, that would be fun—then we could take pictures.” 009 commented.

“Best not. I’m not good at this ‘social’ thing.” Q sighed, turning and leaving the room.

“Make sure he gets home safely. He’s a bit keyed up tonight.” 009 said to James seriously. James nodded and followed the boy out of the room. 009 looked at 005.

“Did you seriously allow them to be alone together?”

“You noticed it too?”

“The bloody tension that you could chew on? Who the fuck didn’t?”

“Seems like they didn’t.”

“You realize you let him wander off with someone who could steal his precious virtue, didn’t you?”

“James? No, he’s a teddy bear—I mean…for an agent. No, he wouldn’t take advantage of Q and Q wouldn’t be taken advantage of. I bet James is the one who should be looking over his shoulder.”

“They don’t even seem to notice.” 005 rolled his eyes. “Are they our next job?”

“Hell no! Q’s still just a baby. No, no, and fuck no. He’s staying our innocent, sweet, adorable, sexless Quartermaster for as long as possible.”

“Aw… Have you adopted him?” 005 asked with a smile.

“He could be my son at his age and…well, I sort of have adopted him, I guess.”

“Aw, Jason, you’ve finally become a mummy. Make sure to protect that baby boy of yours. While you’re at it could you go bake me a pie?” No one even reacted when a brawl broke out.

It was a very typical MI6 Christmas party.

800Q8

“If you’re going to follow me, at least be good at it or just walk next to me like a normal person.” James sped up and walked next to Q.

“Should you really be walking home in this cold? You’re not even going in the right direction.”

“Who says I’m going home?” Q asked. “What if I just didn’t like the company I was in?”

“You like us and you know it.”

“True…” Q admitted after sighing heavily. “Still not good with talking.”

“I doubt you had much practice.”

“You’d be right. No one talks to the one who’s too smart. I lived the life of a freak… Glad to know all the freaks congregate in one place.” He chuckled.

“Everyone at MI6 is a freak in their own way.”

“Good, normal is boring.”

“You’re going to freeze to death.”

“And?”

“And I’ll get murdered for it.” James commented, taking his coat off and wrapping it around Q’s shoulders gently.

“Thank you.” Q sighed, knowing better than to argue about coats and jackets and food with any of the double-os. They all seemed quite intent on keeping him safe from everything, even sniffles. It smelt lovely and was warm…so warm. Q didn’t want to give it up.

“So why are you walking away from your home?”

“It’s Christmas.”

“Do you not like Christmas?”

“I love it.” Q commented.

“Oh…” James said in sudden understanding. “Do you have somewhere you’re…needed?”

“Yes.”

“And you’re not going to lead me there.” James commented.

“No… I was thinking of the best way to knock you unconscious and run.”

“That’s rude.”

“I would have had someone sent to pick you up.” Q smiled.

“Okay…um, you’ll be safe getting there?”

“Yes, mum.”

“Just…send a text to someone, let them know you’re alive, okay?” James asked turning away. “Keep the jacket too, you don’t have a good one.”

“Why do you all worry so much? I can take care of myself, you know.”

“You worry about all of us Q, and we can take care of ourselves. You’re probably the only one who cares… So, forgive us for returning the favor.” James turned his back again. “Merry Christmas, Q.”

“Merry Christmas, Bond.”

“It’s James.” James called as he walked away.

“Whatever you say, Bond.” Q shook his head before he continued down the road.

800Q8

“DARLING!” A warm hug instantly surrounded him. “Euff you smell like smoke. _You’d_ better not be smoking. SHERLOCK! JOHN! HAMISH IS HOME!” Mrs. Hudson called up the stairs. “Go on up, sweetie, I’m bringing sweets. Mycroft and Greg are over.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Hudson.” Q smiled, kissing her cheek before going up the stairs.

“Hamish.” John grinned, pulling him into a hug. Then he slapped Hamish over the back of the head. “Smoking, really? How many times do I have to tell you—”

“It was only two and only those two in the past year, promise.” Q said.

“Doesn’t change a thing, ‘Mish, it’s awful for you.”

“So’s having two agents injured—sorry, one fatally injured, the other is missing.”

“Mycroft!” Greg snapped.

“It’s true.”

“Thanks, uncle. I didn’t know that about my own life, anything else you’d like to tell the class?” At the tone Mycroft looked properly scolded. Sherlock had asked a million times how Q had gained that ability to instantly shut him down, but it wasn’t something teachable. “Did you get the gifts I sent, ah, yes, lovely.” Q smiled.

“You haven’t taken your coat of.” Sherlock observed. “It isn’t yours. Who gave it to you?”

“An agent, they’re all obscenely protective of me. Worse then you lot sometimes.” Q commented, not wanting to take the nice smelling, warm article off. Sherlock raised an eyebrow at Q but didn’t say anything further.

“You’re just in time for presents and desserts.” Mrs. Hudson smiled.

“Because you were waiting for me… I appreciate it, but you didn’t have to. I got dragged into a work function.”

“No problem dear, what’s family for?” She grinned, kissing her cheek. “Here, let me take that jacket.” Q reluctantly unbuttoned it and handed it over. Sherlock smirked. Mycroft opened his mouth and Q glared at him.

“I’m not in the mood to be deduced. It was warm and smelled nice, end of. Don’t keep digging.”

“Of course.” Mycroft shrugged.

“Did they try to get you drunk?” John asked after thinking further about the smells on his son's body.

“Tried, but I don’t drink so…that went over well.” Q chuckled, sitting around the tree with his family.

“Here you are, Hamish. Happy Christmas.” John smiled, handing over presents and pressing a kiss to his cheek.

“Happy Christmas.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	8. You What?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James teaches Q something new.  
> Q falls in love.  
> Sherlock lost a bet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had fun.

You What?!

 

“007?” Q asked over the phone.

_“Q, to what do I owe the honor?”_

“Shut it.” Q rolled his eyes. “I just finished altering a 911. Would you mind coming down and test driving it? You were the only double-o on site, so don’t start getting ideas that you're the favorite and getting new equipment.”

“ _I’ll be down in a second_.” James promised eagerly. Q rolled his eyes and hung up, looking at the empty, lowest level of the car park that was conveniently hooked onto R &D and set up with a track. He glanced at the 911 before he slipped under the Aston, checking on the welding job of one of the R&D people, nodding in approval. “Isn’t she beautiful?” James asked. Q slid out from under it and sat up.

“If you like that sort of thing. I must admit the lines on an Aston are aesthetically pleasing for some unknown reason.” Q shrugged, jumping to his feet. “Here are the keys to the 911.”

“What am I looking for?”

“Nothing. If you notice it I did my job wrong.”

“Why aren’t you test driving it?” James wondered curiously.

“I’ve never driven before and don’t want to test it with MI6’s budget.”

“You what?!” James asked with wide eyes.

“I’m seventeen and I live in London…so no. I haven’t.”

“How do you get to work?”

“Tube… Or if it’s good enough weather I run, I always have extra clothes here. It’s a good workout to start the day.”

“Dear lord…”

“It wouldn’t be practical to drive a car.”

“You run…”

“It’s only four miles.”

“And you’ve never driven a car…that’s deplorable…” James was practically cringing.

“I’ve never needed the skill. Could you just get in the car and drive it already?”

“Sure…but then you need to ditch the grease covered shirt and get into the driver’s seat.”

“Not going to happen.” Q said simply before returning to his work on the Aston as James got into the Porsche. Tires squealed and Q rolled his eyes. He looked over all of his add-ons, making sure none of them would go detected by anyone who wasn’t actually aware that they were there when James tapped his shoulder. “Done already?”

“Yup, now take off the work shirt.”

“Why?” Q asked.

“Because no one would put grease in such a pretty interior.”

“Just blood right?” Q snarked.

“Off.”

“You have such a wonderful manner, no wonder why all the girls fawn over you.” Q rolled his eyes. James smiled a charming, deadly smile.

“Q, you’re learning how to drive today. It could be the easy way or the hard way. Which do you want?” James asked, leaning forward, playfully threatening. Q didn’t flinch or give an inch. “Are you really going to try to say no to me? You’re tiny, I can make you do whatever I like.”

“I’d like to see you try.” Q smirked. James grinned back.

“You don’t back down to anyone, do you?”

“Never.”

“I think that’s why the rest of the double-os like you. What would be the fun of someone who didn’t have a backbone? But enough is enough, you need to learn how to drive.”

“Need?” He asked skeptically.

“Must.” James insisted.

“Why?”

“If not for yourself, for your job.” James grinned.

“What for?” James leaned in further with a smirk, their faces less than an inch apart—whether because double-os were insufferable flirts or they just loved making people uncomfortable, it wasn’t clear.

“It’s the logical thing to do, don’t you think?” James asked, blue eyes meeting piercing green. It was a staring contest of epic proportions, both in stubbornness and sheer intensity. They were practically stealing the air from each other’s lungs.

“Fine.”

“Good boy.” James smirked. Q grinned broadly and pressed a Taser to his thigh. James’ leg gave out and he fell. Q stepped over him.

“Sorry. Don’t call me ‘boy’. In fact, don’t talk down to me at all, best not to.” He smiled and looked down James’ body. “Good job, by the way. Most lose control over their bladder. That would have been a fun story to tell everyone, wouldn’t it?”

“You’re an ass.”

“Some things are genetic, I have no control of it.” Q smirked. “Also, I stole the keys from you.” James patted his pocket as he sat up.

“Fuck.”

“Not bad for a ‘boy’, hmm?” Q asked, holding it out.

“You’re good.” James conceded.

“That was never in question.” Q smiled.

“Get in the car, smart ass.” James ordered. He got in and Q got in next to him. “I’ll get you back for that.”

“Try me.” Q sighed. James looked over at him and noticed the tension in him.

“So you can stare me down and Tase me, but you’re afraid of a car?”

“It’s tons of metal and power, you’re not.”

“You poor baby.” James sighed. “First thing first, seatbelt.”

“You never wear one.”

“I’m not a boy with spots and no facial hair who has never been in control of a car. Okay?”

“Good point.” Q commented, strapping himself in.

“When was the last time you were in the front seat of a car?”

“Not working on it?”

“Exactly.”

“Um…dad was driving to Baskerville.”

“How old were you? Wait. Baskerville?”

“Long story about a dog and a blue rabbit. Six…ish.”

“Oh lord, you haven’t even learned by example. Okay, having worked on a car, tell me where everything is.”

“Gas on the right, brake on the left…and um...it’s manual so…there’s that and…um…”

“You’re adorable when you’re out of your element.” And he was: floppy hair, blushing, lip biting, and full of nervous, fidgeting energy.

“Don’t use it against me.”

“I won’t.” James promised gently. “Do you trust me?”

“With a car? No.”

“With you. Do you think I’d allow you to get hurt?” James asked.

“No, you wouldn’t.”

“Alright, we agree on something then.” James smiled. “Alright, turn the car on. Alright…?”

“Yeah, sorry.”

“You put this together, you can trust it. Everything you’ve ever given me has been trustworthy.”

“Not the belt.”

“Okay, that wasn’t your fault, that is what happens when bad people do bad things and I didn't fall that far.” James sighed. “But it’s just us down here, so we don’t have to worry about anything else. Alright…hand on the wheel and a hand here.” He placed Q’s hand on the shifter and left his hand on top of Q’s, just because he could tell Q was nervous. “Calm down. I already told you I won’t let you get hurt. Trust me.” He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“Being on an op would be easier. Okay…”

“Brake.” James smiled.

“Okay.” Q nodded. James helped move to move Q’s hand.

“Alright, don’t hit the gas, just let the car roll for a moment, alright?” Q did as told and they moved forward slowly. "See? Alright?”

“Not dead.”

“Okay, that’s a good first step.” James smiled. “Alright, now, ease onto the accelerator, alright?” James watched as Q slowly did as he said. “Very good. Now, turn…smoother, smoother. Think about looking further ahead, smooth movements.”

“Okay.”

“Better.” James smiled. “Go faster whenever you feel comfortable, alright?” It only took a few minutes and Q gained speed. James kept his hand over Q’s, drawing soothing circles on the back of Q’s hand gently.

Q was a very fast learner, very fast. Within an hour James was confident in him, at any speed…though…not quite sure how he’d feel in actual traffic.

“Very good. Now you can say you can drive.”

“Thank you.” Q turned and smiled at him as he put the car in park.

“Was it as bad as you thought?”

“No…I can see why you all like to drive so fast though.”

“It’s amazing isn’t it?”

“Yeah.” Q nodded.

“Glad you enjoyed it.” That’s when they both realized, awkwardly, that James still had his hand on Q’s. “Oh, sorry.”

“Um, it’s alright… Well, thanks for teaching me.”

“Thanks for not killing us all.” Q chuckled and looked down. James got out of the car and disappeared as only an agent could. Q got out of the car and pulled out his phone.

 _Call if convenient._ _–HWH_

It was practically a code-word in his family. Drop everything and do as I ask, it’s important, even if it doesn’t seem like it. Q’s phone rang and he lifted it to his ear.

“ _What’s wrong_?” Sherlock asked worriedly.

“Dad?... What do you do when you fall in love?”

“I _owe John money. Couldn’t you have waited another fifteen hours for this call_?”

“Fuck you, I’m having a crisis and possibly a mental breakdown.”

“ _Don’t say that to your father, Mish_!” John snapped. Damn…he was on speaker phone.

_“Love…really?”_

“I think so…never felt anything like this before.”

“ _Would you rather die or talk to him_?” John asked.

“Die…slow and painful.”

_“It’s love, or at least love-adjacent.”_

_“Mish…just…wait a while, alright. I know you’re a Holmes and usually we only give our hearts once…but…you’re young and…just be cautious, alright? Make sure you’re right before you act.”_

“Yes, dad.”

 _“And, trust me, love. Waiting is worth it_.” John promised.

“Thank you, papa.” Hamish whispered.

“ _Is it an agent?”_ Sherlock demanded suddenly.

“What?”

“ _Ah, it is, interesting. Is it the one who gave you the coat? Oh, of course, obvious.”_

“Dad this is why no one calls you.” Hamish hung up. Only his father had the rudeness to deduce people over a phone.

Q closed his eyes and looked down at the ground. How had this happened? They’d just been friends then suddenly it changed out of nowhere.

It almost felt like…

It felt how his dad had described meeting his papa. How one moment it was: “Afghanistan or Iraq” then it was “Not a very nice man” and from that moment it had transformed. It was just one moment where everything had clicked for Sherlock. In that moment Sherlock had fallen in love with John.

Q…Q was sure it happened when James wrapped his coat around his shoulders. He still had that coat… He’d never given it back.

Q smiled at the memory. He didn’t even know why that was the moment, but it was. He had liked him before, his charm, his smile, his personality, his devotion…everything… And he was beautiful…and his eyes.

Q looked down at his hand and smiled, he’d held it and stroked it, comforting him. His hand still felt warm.

“Get ahold of yourself, Q. It can’t happen.” Q was still just a teenager. James was eight and a half years older than him. They were worlds, a thousand miles, poles apart. Nearly polar opposites…even in appearance. “Snap out of it Q… He wouldn’t want you anyway.” Q straightened up and headed for the door.

He never stopped to think about Sherlock and John who were a mirror image of him and James. It was the same thing with different souls: a thinker and a soldier.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	9. First Assignment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q goes on a mission and comes back, though not in one piece.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After next week, updates may or may not be a little slower. I've hit a rough patch in this story, sorry guys.

First Assignment

 

Q woke up and sighed heavily. The back yard alarm had gone off, a south window on the first floor had a silent alarm go off. He looked through a camera on his phone and sighed, disabling the system and pulling on a dressing gown before he walked down the stairs and waited in the living room for 001. 001 stepped into the room a moment later, bloodied and dirty. “Q…?”

“Alright?” Q asked gently, arms wrapped around his torso. 001 looked at him for a moment and then shook his head. “Okay…how about you put that gun down and I get something to clean you up, right?” 001 stared at him blankly for a minute before nodded. “You’re safe here, I’ll be right back, promise.” Q smiled. 001 slowly unarmed himself and slowly put it on the small table in front of him. Q returned, making just enough noise before approaching the agent, dabbing at his face with the wet towel, being mindful that there may be injuries under the blood. He cleaned off his face before nodding. “Shirt? I can see you bleeding under there.” Q said, reaching into the drawer in the table and pulling free a medical kit.

“Can I trust you with stitches?”

“Do you want to go to medical?” Q retorted. 001 took off his shirt, hissing slightly. He was covered in bruises and blood from a wound on his right shoulder. “Knife?”

“Yeah…”

“Okay…” Q said gently, guiding him gently into his seat before sitting next to him and having him turn just slightly so he could reach the wound. He carefully cleaned the wound before he began stitching it, neat, precise little stitches.

“You’re good at that. Is there anything you can’t do?”

“I can’t watch scary movies.” 001 laughed and Q smacked him. “Stay still you idiot.”

“Sorry…” 001 smiled and it almost touched his tired eyes. He stopped moving and Q continued. “So scary movies, huh, kid?”

“I just can’t do it.”

“You see more gore in real life.”

“Maybe that’s why. Maybe I see enough already.”

“You really do…for a kid.”

“I think I’m past the ‘kid’ stage.”

“Wait a moment.” 001 said, almost in awe a smile creeping onto his face. “Look at that!” He grinned.

“What?”

“Our little Q is growing facial hair now.” 001 grinned, touching under Q’s chin with his left hand,

“What?!”

“Yup, right there, just a little bit.” 001 smiled. “You look disappointed.”

“I’d look horrible with facial hair.”

“Of course it would come down to looks for you, baby face. I don’t think you could look bad, QT.”

“You know the flirting doesn’t unnerve me, right?”

“It throws everyone else off.”

“That’s because they have no confidence and no brains.”

“I would love to figure out what makes you uncomfortable, just to watch you squirm.”

“Good luck, there isn’t much that makes me squirm.”

“I’ll find something.” 001 commented as Q finished his stiches and covered them with a white bandage.

“There you go… I should have some baggy clothes somewhere that’ll fit. You’re welcome in the guest bedroom, no windows and a really heavy door. If you need me I’m right next door.” He smiled and stood up. 001 snatched his wrist and held it. Q stopped, obligingly.

“Q…”

“Yes?”

“Thank you… I’m not, I’m not alright…but I feel safe here. With you. I don’t know why, kid.”

“Because…I’m the only person who’s with you when it all goes to hell.”

“I guess you’re the calm voice of reason. I suppose we know you aren’t going to leave us, even when the others would. We know what you did for 006. We know you looked for him long after they told you to stop. You found him when no one else wanted to… Maybe that’s why.” 001 said, not looking at Q. “Thank you, for that.” He said, rubbing the back of his hand gently with a thumb. “No one else has ever done that for us.”

“You’d chase me down if I got lost, why wouldn’t I do the same for you?” Q smiled. “Come on, clean clothes and a nice bed for you.”

“I’ll get you’re sheets dirty.”

“Take a shower if you want.”

“Pretty vulnerable in a shower, haven’t you ever seen Psycho?”

“Then buy me new sheets for the guest bedroom after you’re done. I don’t care, just get some rest, you’re exhausted.”

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” Q smiled, going to bed.

Q woke to breakfast being cooked below. He put on his glasses and walked down the stairs. 001 was in the kitchen. “Breakfast?”

“Thank you. What’s this for?”

“Everything.”

“A double-o a softie?”

“Don’t spread rumors, kid.”

“No, everyone comes to me with secrets and I do the smart thing.”

“Shut your mouth?”

“Keep them for blackmailing purposes.” Q corrected, taking a bite. “You’re a good cook, thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Stay as long as you want.”

“I’ll buy you a razor with those sheets right?”

“Dear God.”

“I’ll teach you, since you don’t have daddy dearest around.” 001 winked. Q looked down at his watch and sighed.

“Just don’t burn my house down while I’m gone, okay? And take a shower and change the sheets, alright?”

“Alright.”

“Thank you for breakfast.”

“You’re welcome.”

800Q8

The phone rang and Q picked it up, the code in front of him stopping only for a second before he pinned the phone between his shoulder and ear, continuing his work. “This is Q.”

“ _Q, I need to see you in my office, whenever you’re available_.”

“Fifteen minutes, ma’am.”

“ _See you then_.” The phone clicked and Q hung up. He worked for ten more minutes before he made his way up to her office. Tanner met him just outside her office.

“She’s insane.”

“What? Why?”

“Just…be careful.”

“What?” Q asked Tanner.

“Just, never mind. She’s expecting you.” Tanner sighed, opening the door. Q frowned at him and stepped inside, the door closing behind him.

“Ah, there you are Q.”

“No.” 009 said instantly.

“I’m not giving you a choice in the matter.”

“I said no.”

“What did I just walk in to?”

“You saw the brief on the Kabul mission, did you not?” M asked, standing up.

“Of course I did. I put nearly all of the information together myself. It was sort of my idea.” M looked at 009 and raised an eyebrow in challenge. 009 stood up in a rush.

“The answer is no.”

“Do you want treason on your record?” Q looked between the two of them, observing. The situation became quite clear to him.

009 was being assigned to the Kabul mission…and M was sending Q with him.

“Send Tiago. He can handle this.”

“005 is in deep cover, we can’t just pull him out of it, even Q hasn’t personally spoken to him in weeks.”

“Which is making me nervous, by the way.” Q commented.

“I’m not doing it. It’s Q for God’s sake!”

“Is no one going to ask me my opinion?”

“No!” 009 shouted at him and Q rolled his eyes. “He’s the biggest asset we have and you want him in the field? Are you insane, M?”

“No, he can handle it.”

“The hell with this. Why can’t we just wait for Tiago, he’ll be done within the week with his track record?”

“He needs to stay in China for as long as necessary, we can’t rush him and the Kabul mission is very time-sensitive.”

“Pick some other tech.” 009 insisted. “If this goes tits up I don’t want Q out there, what if he gets hurt?”

“I realize you love mothering him, but we don’t have a single tech who’s fluent in all the right languages and can do what is needed.”

“How many languages are you fluent in?” 009 asked, suddenly a bit distracted.

“I don’t know, I’ve lost count. Surely more than anyone in MI6.”

“He shouldn’t be out there.” 009 was back on track.

“Then make sure here is no incident. His life will be in your hands, so do take this mission seriously.”

“I can’t—”

“009, it’s alright. I’ll talk to her, go.”

“But Q—”

“Do you want _me_ to get angry with you?” No one liked Q when he was angry. “Go.” 009 left.

“I trust you’ll be more level-headed.”

“Yes, I will. I trust I have permission to check out whatever I want?”

“Yes.”

“Can I take a few personal tools, there are things that would help me—?”

“Whatever you want. Watch 009’s back, won’t you?” Q smiled.

“I will.”

“I sent you the brief.”

“I’ve got it memorized. I wrote it.”

“You have a good memory.”

“You have no clue.” Q sighed, walking out of her office.

800Q8

Q opened the front door to his house, 009 following him. “I don’t like this.” 009 sighed heavily.

“I know you don’t.”

“Q stop!” 009 hissed, grabbing him and throwing him behind him, drawing his gun. “Someone’s here.”

“001, 009’s a paranoid bastard, come out slowly please.” 001 slowly walked out of the bathroom a moment later.

“Here to shoot me, Jason.”

“Sorry, 001.” 009 said slowly, lowering his gun.

“What’s Jason doing here?” 001 asked as Q walked around his house, packing a bag. “Wait, what?” He looked at 009 with wide eyes. “Fuck no you aren’t.”

“M’s orders.” 009 hissed.

“He can’t go out there. He’s barely got facial hair!”

“He doesn’t—wait…does he?” 009 looked at Q.

“Dear lord, look at what you’ve started.” Q shook his head.

“Oh God, he does. Our little baby is growing up.”

“He can’t go out in the field—he can’t.”

“Okay, shut up. I can take care of myself and 009 will look out for me. It should be in-and-out, we’ll be fine.”

“I’m not worried about Jason, I’m worried about you.”

“Thank you! For understanding, Mark.” 009 nodded.

“You two are like old woman. Fucking mother hens.”

“Don’t swear!”

“Point made.” Q nodded, running up the stairs to finish packing his small bag before going back down the stairs. He added two more things before turning to 001. “Did you get new sheets?”

“New what?” 009 demanded furiously, wanting to rip 001’s throat out.

“Sheets, he bloodied my guest bedroom. It looked like a crime scene.” Q clarified before anyone got murdered.

“Jason, he’s fifteen years younger than me, chill out. And I’m straight.”

“Sorry, I’m just—”

“A mother hen, it’s been established. Come on, we have a flight to catch. Lock up when you leave 001 and that room had better be in perfect order when I get back.”

“Yes, Q.”

800Q8

Landing in Kabul was interesting, because the instant they landed 009 practically dragged Q out of the airport and to their hotel. “Smooth.” Q rolled his eyes as soon as their door was closed.

“Wouldn’t do to dally. You stick out like a sore thumb.”

“I could tell them I’m albino.”

“Shut up.”

“Yes, dad.” Q said as petulantly as possible. “Besides, I’m not supposed to fit in. _You’re_ on a business trip and couldn’t leave me at home, not my problem that I don’t fit in.”

“You’re impossible.”

“I know.” Q shrugged, pulling out his laptop and sitting down on one of the two beds. “Alright, I’m setting up an investment meeting for you for tomorrow… I’ll sneak in during that time, and don’t worry, I’ll be in your ear the entire time.”

“I don’t like you doing this alone.”

“Do we have much choice?”

“Can you fire a gun?”

“Have you seen my range scores?”

“No.”

“Better than 002’s so don’t worry about me.”

“Can you kill a man?”

“I’ve done it before and I can do it again.” Q said, ending the conversation. “We’ll meet in the stairwell on the northeast side of the building, agreed?”

“Agreed.”

800Q8

001 wasn’t the only person watching the Kabul mission in Q-branch, staring worriedly after the young Quartermaster. They watched as he slipped a drive of information into his pocket and then typed for another minute before leaving the room, gun in hand. “Q there’s one coming down the hallway on your right.” R warned.

“ _Anyone else nearby_?” Q wondered.

“No. He’s armed and—” Q moved on the screen, two bullets sounded, Q hissed in pain. “Q?”

“ _I’m alright, just a graze_.” They watched as he started running down a large set of stairs. 009 came through a door.

_“Are you alright, kid?”_

_“I’m fine, I’ve had much worse.”_

“Q, coming through the door.”

“ _Down.”_ Q warned. 009 dropped and three bullets struck three targets, dropping them. 009 grabbed Q by the arm and they ran. _“Some distraction you were.”_

 _“I did all I could.”_ 009 snapped back.

They watched and waited until the two got into a car and sped away.

“Sitrep?”

_“Information secure, agent secure, asset will need medical upon arrival at evac—nothing big, stitches and some pain killers should do it.”_

“I’ve alerted the team, bring him home safely.”

“ _Yes, R. 009 out.”_

_“Q out.”_

Everyone breathed a sigh of relief.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	10. The Hearts of Double-os

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Crying and cuddling and straight razors.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Tiago...really I do.

The Hearts of Double-os

 

Q returned to MI6 for debrief and to work through what he’d stolen, but M had ordered him to give it to R and go home. He sighed and rolled his eyes before he went home and laid down on his sofa, turning on Top Gear and working remotely—M could throw a fit if she wanted to. His side stung a bit, but it was more of a dull constant ache than a pain.

He was home only for thirty minutes before his alarm went off. Someone was in his back yard. He looked at the camera and shook his head, taking down the defensive measures as a double-o broke into his house. A few seconds later Alec came in through the back room carrying take-away. “It is really two easy to break into your house.”

“Next time the silent alarm goes off and it’s you I won’t take down the security measures and we can laugh while you’re in medical.” Q sighed, starting to sit up.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!” Alec rushed forward and gently nudged him back down.

“I’m hurt not dead and it didn’t even hit anything vital.” Q huffed and sat back down.

“I’ve been shot before, kiddo, I don’t need you straining yourself. We need you in one piece.” Alec said, sorting through the take away. “You like Thai don’t you?”

“Yeah.” Alec handed him the box and eating utensils, handing him a drink.

“Top Gear?”

“Yeah…”

“Cool.” Alec shrugged, flopping down on the arm chair, kicking his feet up on the coffee table.

“Feet down.”

“Make me—oh wait.” Alec smirked at him.

“I hate you.” Q sighed, starting to eat. “Why are you still here?”

“I like this episode.”

“You’re baby-sitting me.”

“James is up to watch you next. We’re here to make sure you’re comfy and taken care of and don’t work yourself to death.”

“Fuck off.”

“Language! I will wash your mouth out with soap boy.”

“I’ll shoot you before you can get to anything resembling soap.”

“Okay. You were shot, I’ll let that one slide.”

“My house, my rules, feet off the table or I’ll have you shot, that chair does recline you know.”

“Whatever you say boffin.” Alec agreed, leaning back.

“Just don’t annoy me.”

“You’re grumpier than usual.”

“Just, shut up.”

“Alright.” Alec nodded.

They sat in silence. The phone rang a few moments later. Q looked at it and frowned before he answered it. “Hello?”

_“Hamish? Are you alright?”_

“I’m fine, John.”

 _“Who’s with you?”_ Sherlock asked instantly.

“It’s fine, Will, just a body guard, no one to worry about.” Hamish assured them.

 _“Mycroft said you got shot, are you alright?”_ John demanded.

“Grazed my side, I had worse playing hide-and-seek with Jim. I’m alright.”

_“I need to come over.”_

“Don’t, you know you can’t right now.”

“ _But_ …”

“Look, I’ll see you when I’m not being baby sat, alright?”

“ _Promise me you’re alright?”_ John demanded.

“I’m okay, I promise.”

_“Call us when you’re alone.”_

“Of course.”

_“Love you.”_

“You too, both of you.”

 _“Get some rest.”_ John insisted.

 _“I will. I’ll see you soon, goodbye.”_ Hamish hung up before he got a gunshot aftercare tutorial from John.

“Family or friends?”

“None of your damn business.”

“Sorry, Q.”

“You’re right…I’m grumpy. Sorry.”

“Do I get to put my feet up then?”

“No chance in hell.”

800Q8

009 dropped in four hours later, bringing chocolates, teas, and medicine. He took one look at Q, pressed a kiss to his forehead and squeezed his shoulder. “You alright?”

“Yes, father.”

“Shut up, kiddo… I mean it.”

“I’ll be alright, just…”

“Alright.” 009 nodded and left the house.

James showed up an hour later and nodded to Alec who got up and left the house. James looked down at Q and sighed heavily. “How long has it been since you slept?”

“Day and a half.”

“Without medication putting you under?”

“A few more than that.” James frowned and lifted Q’s feet, sitting down before putting Q’s feet down on his lap. He left his hand on one of Q’s ankles. James didn’t ask, he didn’t say anything, but it was the subject that hovered in the air between them. Alec hadn’t mentioned it and Q had been grateful. 009 had alluded to it, but James—James had put it right out there.

There was silence, until Q broke it with a sniffle.

James instantly moved. “Q—” Q sat up, wincing and hissing in pain before wrapping his arms around James. “Sh, it’s alright.” James promised, running fingers through Q’s hair, his other hand on his side. Q winced. “Sorry, sorry.” James moved his hand and held onto Q. “It’s alright. You had to, okay? It’s alright. It’s okay…” Q clung to his shirt and cried. James sighed and held onto him.

“I’m sorry, I just—”

“Sh, it’s alright. I understand.” James promised.

“I can’t just…wash it all away, it’s still there on my hands. Every damn time I kill it just hurts more…”

“Sh it’s alright. It’s good that you’re upset, it’s a good thing. You wouldn’t be you if you weren’t upset. You just have to know that it wasn’t your fault. You did what you had to do.”

“This is why I didn’t ask to be an agent.”

“I didn’t think you had a choice.”

“Bond, with my brain I could have been anything. No... I wasn’t meant to do this. I didn’t like doing this before. I can’t.”

“Sh… It’s okay. We’ll do everything we can so that you never have to do that again, okay. I promise. We will never want you to go through this. Not ever again.” James promised.

“I don’t know why it hurts so much… They deserved it but…”

“It’s alright.” James whispered.

“I’m sorry, I’m crying on you, not something I should be doing.” Q sat up, but couldn’t quite let go of James’ shirt.

“It’s alright.” Q had never, ever, felt comfortable with an assassins hand on the back of his neck, but somehow it was comforting. “It’s alright, Q. It’s okay to be upset, you know.”

“No, not like this. It’s my job.”

“No, it’s an agent’s job and you aren’t an agent, Q. Tell you the truth…the first time I killed I didn’t sleep for a week. I couldn’t Q. It still upsets me…I’m…just better at hiding it.”

“I wouldn’t make it as a field agent would I?” Q let out a choked laugh, leaning his head forward, resting just his forehead on James’ shoulder.

“No…you wouldn’t. But we need someone at home. Someone we can all talk to, someone who understands. Besides we’d never send anyone smart into the field—not with the possibility for brain damage.”

“Are you calling yourself stupid?”

“Except for me. I’m a genius.” Q let out a choked laugh. “Sh…you’re alright. We will never put you in that situation again, okay?” Q nodded into his shoulder. “I don’t know a single double-o who wouldn’t give everything to keep you from feeling this ever again. We’ll make sure it never happens.”

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Come on… Let’s get you to sleep okay? You’ll feel better in the morning.”

“You’re lying.”

“I know…but sleep is still necessary.”

“Okay…”

“Come on.” James said, getting up, helping the younger man to his feet. James slowly walked, following Q’s lead to his room. He attempted to pull his shirt off but the movement pulled at his wound, making it ache. “Here.” James gently pulled it off for him. He pulled the blankets back and helped Q into the bed, just to make sure he didn’t hurt his side. “God you’re skinny.”

“Thin.”

“Yes, as a whip. It’s frightening.”

“Screw you.” Q laid down on his good side and paused.

“Do you want me to stay?” Q nodded. James pulled the covers over Q’s form before he laid down on the other edge of the bed. Q reached out and grabbed the end of his sleeve tightly.

“Sorry…just…need to know someone’s here.”

“I understand. There’s a reason why Alec and I share a flat. Someone needs to keep us from going crazy.” James plucked Q’s glasses off his face. “Do you need anything to help you sleep? There’s some medicine.”

“No…just, don’t leave me alone.”

“Okay.” James smiled slightly. “Get some sleep, Q.”

Q fell asleep with one hand clutching James’ shirt.

800Q8

James woke instantly when he felt the bed shift. He hadn’t meant to sleep. “Sh…” James whispered gently when he saw Q shifting, fidgeting, the tell-tale start to a nightmare. “Sh…” He soothed, running a hand through his hair gently. “Sh, you’re alright.” Q seemed to calm at his voice and relax. “It’s alright.” James promised. The door opened slightly and James pointed a gun at it. Two hands were held through the crack in surrender and then Tiago slipped through. “You’re back?” James asked in a quiet whisper.

“Yeah…then I heard about our poor Q…had to come make sure he was alright.”

“He couldn’t sleep.”

“He shouldn’t be killing people.” Tiago frowned. “Keep him safe. I’ll be downstairs, alright?”

“Okay.”

“And thanks for not shooting me. I’ve been shot at enough in the past thirty hours.”

“No problem.” Tiago sighed and left the room, closing the door and making sounds intentionally as he went down the stairs so that James knew he was moving.

800Q8

Q woke to blue eyes and jolted back. “It’s alright, Q, it’s me.”

“Holy fuck, it’s too early in the damn morning for a heart attack.” Q snapped covering his eyes with his hands.

“You’re the one who begged me to crawl into bed with you.” James teased.

“Too early to try to banter, need tea first.”

“That can be arranged. You alright if I leave?”

“Yeah.” Q nodded.

“I’ll put the kettle on. Tiago’s downstairs to babysit you.”

“I’m not a baby.”

“Boffinsit then.”

“Wait, 005’s back?”

“Yeah.”

“Good, I was worried about him.” James smiled and left the bedroom. Q slowly got around (which entailed putting on a shirt and socks and his glasses) before he went down the stairs. Tiago was talking quietly to James as James gathered the necessary things for tea.

“There’s my favorite Boffin.”

“Hello, 005. You alright?”

“I’m fine…got shot at a few times, but I made it out alright. I can never go back to China. There won’t be a soul who isn’t out to kill me. Maybe I’ll dye my hair.”

“Ugh, don’t do that, brown suits you and what in the hell else would you be? Blonde? Ick.” Q scoffed.

“Thank you?” Tiago asked. “You’re a bit adorable when you’re sleepy.”

“Shut up or I’ll send you back.”

“I refuse to go back on the grounds that even I don’t deserve that punishment.”

“Agreed.” Q chuckled. “I would hurry with the tea before I get grumpy.”

“Here you are, Q.” James chuckled, handing a fresh cup over.

“Thank heavens.” Q sighed, taking a sip. “Spies do have some utility…”

“I’m going to go…keep an eye on him, make sure he takes some medicine and don’t let him do anything strenuous, got it?”

“Yup.” Tiago nodded.

“See you, kid.” Q waved as James left the house.

“You pour little lamb…” Tiago sighed. “You look like a kicked puppy.”

“Shut up.”

“Alright…” Then his eyes widened. “My little boy’s grown up! When did this start happening?”

“A few days ago, haven’t really had the time to—”

“Straight or disposable?”

“Di—”

“Nope, we’re changing that. I’m going to teach you a very important art today, got it?”

“Do I have a choice?”

“No.”

“Alright…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	11. Meeting Mallory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ever wonder how Mallory got the position for M so easily?  
> Maybe he worked for Mycroft first.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An early update. Also, there will be one on Sunday. Don't think this will be a normal thing, It just happened.  
> I don't own anything. I never say it, but it's always true.

Meeting Mallory

 

Q walked through Diogenes and was instantly let through without a single raised eyebrow. They didn’t question Q, because he’d been coming to Diogenes since he was a baby, before he was born even. Q pushed open his uncle’s office door and saw four heads snap in his direction in an instant. “Oh, Hamish.” John sighed gratefully, racing forward and wrapping his arms around his son, pulling away to look at him. “You look like hell.”

“Well I was shot and killed people, so yes, I look and feel like hell.”

“Let me see.” John lifted Q’s shirt and looked at the bandaging on his wound.

“Papa…”

“I have to make sure they did a good job bandaging you.” John snapped, looking the wound up and down, trying to find a mistake in the bandaging.

“John, its fine.” Sherlock assured him.

“Have a heart you bastard, our son’s been shot.” Sherlock raised his hands in mock surrender.

“Papa, I’m alright.” Hamish promised, grabbing John’s arm tightly.

“I have the report here, as I told you, he is perfectly fine, didn’t even need a blood donor.”

“Shut up, Mycroft!” Sherlock snapped, walking across the room to pull Q into a hug. “You smell like someone else…and is that aftershave?” Sherlock ran his fingers over Q’s cheek and nodded. “Expensive brand, which one of them put a straight razor to your throat?”

“Dad—”

“A what?” Lestrade and John demanded at the same time.

“Obviously teaching our boy how to shave with something other than deplorable razors.”

“Hey, I use those.” John commented.

“And me too.” Lestrade insisted.

“And you wonder why Mycroft and I look particularly better put together.” Sherlock scoffed. “Which was it, the one you like or your friend?”

“His friend, isn’t it obvious, Sherlock?” Mycroft suggested.

“Oh, yes, not blushing, heart rate slow, should have known.” Sherlock insisted, backing away from his son.

“I thought you four were worried about me, but it turns out two of you care and the other two are more interested in deducing me. Anyone want to guess who is who?” Q snapped.

“Don’t be like that, you know I worry.” Sherlock commented, ruffling his hair, before pulling him forward and pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead. “I care, you know I do.”

“Oh, you’re adorable, Sherlock.” Lestrade grinned at the detective before he got up and squeezed Q’s shoulder. “Alright, kiddo?”

“Yes, I’ll be alright.”

“They better not bloody send you into the field again. I swear to God I’ll get my gun out and—”

“The gun you’re not supposed to have.” Lestrade commented.

“You’d hunt them down with me too, Greg.” John insisted.

“We all would.” Sherlock commented.

“Guys, you can’t do that. So I got hurt, I watched my dad and papa come home with bullet and knife wounds every other week. I love my job, you can’t keep me from it. I’ll get hurt, but I’ll bounce back. I’m a Holmes and a Watson.”

“We’d still hunt you down.”

“I know.”  There was a knock on the door.

“Come in.” Mycroft called. A man stepped through.

“Sorry if I’m interrupting, sir.”

“Just seeing to a family matter. Hamish this is—”

“Lieutenant Colonel Gareth Mallory, member of the SAS recently honorably discharged after spending months being ‘interrogated’ by the IRA, I know.”

“He’s definitely one of the family.” Mallory shifted slightly before he held out his hand. Q took it and shook it. “Tell that all from a look, somehow?”

“No, I read your file.”

“What? It’s protected.” Mycroft stated. Q smirked and looked at his uncle.

“From me? No. And if you think you’re the only one in this family who is protective and spies on their family members because of it, you’re wrong. Keep a good eye on my uncle, I’m sure he’ll get you a good job for it and you won’t be bored.”

“He’s _your_ son.” John sighed, shaking his head and looking at Sherlock.

“Obviously, he’s half yours too, you realize? The getting shot part is all yours.”

“Your brains got him into that—”

“Your soldier past got him into it—”

“Boys, stop it.” Lestrade frowned. “I’m glad you’re alright, kiddo. Take care of yourself, and come have dinner at our place sometime soon, won’t you? Myc won’t admit it, but we miss having you around.”

“Of course, Uncle Greg.” Lestrade beamed and hugged Q, mindful of the wound, before leaving the room with a wave to Mycroft.

“So, I suspect you’re a genius too then?” Mallory asked.

“Yes, I am.”

“Modesty, Hamish.” John frowned. “He gets that from you too.” John muttered and Sherlock smirked.

“Are you the genius who’s Quartermaster at MI6 at only seventeen?”

“Eighteen in a few weeks. But I started earlier than seventeen, yes. You researched me.” Q smiled.

“I know some people. I may not be able to read you or your file like a book, but I have my ways.”

“You can keep him around.” Q said to his uncle with a nod. “Pleasure to meet you. My family and I will leave so you can tell Mycroft everything he’s already read off of your left sleeve.” Q led John and Sherlock towards the door as Mallory looked down at himself.

“My left sleeve?”

“Yes, your left sleeve gave everything away, but do prattle on.” Sherlock smirked as they closed the door behind them. It wasn’t until they were out of Diogenes that Sherlock and Hamish started laughing uncontrollably.

“What did you boys do?” John sighed. “If it was the damn itching powder again—no, you didn’t read a damn thing off of his sleeve did you?”

“No, it’s just fun to screw with people sometimes.” Q giggled. “Ow.” He groaned, pain searing his side as he laughed. He saw a familiar head of brunette hair across the road and instantly, dropped his hand away from his wound. The last thing he needed was everyone knowing he hurt.

“You can’t laugh with a damn gunshot wound.” John rolled his eyes. “Dinner?”

“Starving.” Hamish answered, trying to calm his remaining chuckles and looking away from the man before his father noticed.

“Good, we need to talk.” Sherlock smirked.

“Oh, no, please god no.”

“Yes,” Sherlock wrapped an arm around his shoulders, pulling him close. “We need to have a talk.”

“Papa, save me.”

“Do you let your agents see you act this childish?” Sherlock wondered. “Taxi!”

“No because my parents aren’t hovering over me all day.” Hamish ducked out from under his arm as a taxi moved over.

“I really can’t protect you, he’s been awful for weeks.”

“Awful?” Sherlock asked, opening the door. “Now I thought we’d been having a lovely time.” He winked at John.

“Oh god.” Hamish covered his ears and ducked into the cab, sliding as far away as possible.

“What, it’s natural, Mish, nothing to be embarrassed about.”

“Fine, trying burning the image of Uncle Mycroft and Greg out of your mind.” Hamish commented. Sherlock’s nose wrinkled in disgust.

“Touché…god I can’t unsee that.”

“Now you know how I feel.” Hamish sighed. “Angelo’s?”

“Agreed.”

800Q8

“Hamish!” Angelo beamed, pulling Hamish into a hug. “You look more and more like your dad every time I see you. I’m glad to see the whole family in. Go on, I’ve got your table empty.”

“Thank you.” Hamish sighed. He always had to pull his chair to the table, but it was the place they’d always sat, right next to the window. “So…” Hamish said slowly.

“So, do I need to ask Mycroft for a favor or are you going to tell me everything about him so I can stalk him.”

“Who says it’s a ‘him’?”

“Are you really insulting my intelligence, Hamish Watson-Holmes? Do I need to talk about the coat or the cologne or the fact that you prefer men judging by the—?”

“Okay okay! Jesus, you got riled up quickly.”

“I did warn you.” John sighed. “Thanks Angelo.” He smiled as drinks were set down in front of them.

“Not a problem.” He nodded before walking away.

“Name.”

“Dad…”

“ _Name_.”

“James, his name is James Bond alright?”

“Thank you, now I can go about stalking him properly.”

“Dad, please don’t.” The door opened and Hamish saw his papa tense slightly, just enough to be visible.

“John?” Sherlock asked, instantly noticing.

“We’re being followed.” John’s eyes flickered at the man who was taking a seat. Sherlock’s eyes followed his.

“Professional killer, paranoid, following Hamish.” Sherlock muttered quietly. Hamish huffed and got up.

“’Mish!” John protested.

“Let me deal with this.”

“Why?”

“Because he’s _my_ professional killer.” Hamish’s whole demeanor changed and he became Q as he walked over to the other table. “Tiago, you realize they’re my family. I’m safe.”

“You realize you’ve just been shot, if I’m not following you someone else will and they don’t know you like I do. Or do you really want everyone to know you spend your spare time at Diogenes and Baker Street?”

“Next mission?”

“Mmhm?”

“You’ll be lucky to have a toothpick.”

“I love you too, kiddo.” Tiago winked and patted Q’s arm.

“You can go.”

“Someone has to watch your ass.”

“My papa has a gun trained on you right now, I’m fine.” Tiago glanced over Q’s shoulder.

“Your papa has style…” Tiago shrugged. “No dice… I’m not letting you get hurt, because that’s what friends do. So go sit down, I won’t even listen in on your conversation. Know anything good to eat here?” Tiago smirked and Q shook his head, sighing in relent.

“The Chicken Crostina is very good, and to your taste, but everything is good here. Tell Angelo you’re my friend, it’ll be on the house.”

“Thank you, bof.”

“Thank you.” Q patted his shoulder before he went and sat back down with his family.

“Babysitter?” Sherlock asked.

“Boffinsitter,” Hamish corrected.

“He isn’t here to kill you?” John asked.

“No, he’s a good friend of mine, probably one of my best friends at Six.”

“He knows about us.” Sherlock commented.

“Hacker,” Hamish shrugged. “He won’t say anything.”

“He’s the one who taught you how to shave.”

“Yes.”

“Good teacher.” Sherlock shrugged. “You can keep him, put the gun down, John, we wouldn’t get free food if you covered the walls in blood.”

“Right…” John sighed, shifting, slipping his gun away.

“Just another, normal, lunch out with the family…good times.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much love.


	12. Ex-009

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Calm(ish) before the storm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's about to get bad everyone.

Ex-009

 

Q’s twenty first year would be horrible. James Bond’s thirtieth year would be a confusing disaster. And a Tiago’s year would be the first of many intended to break him. At the moment it was happy. Tiago, Tanner, and Q were playing video games on Q’s sofa. Tiago was the best, but they had fun regardless of the constant losing. It was a weekly thing, unless Tiago was on a mission, the three of them always did something and occasionally others would join them just to try and get rid of some of the MI6 stress.

“You know, I think I know someone good for you.” Q commented, downing a drink and pointing at Tanner.

“Me?”

“Yes, of course, you’ve been alone too long.”

“Are you trying to set me up?” Tanner scoffed.

“Yes, Bill, maybe I am.”

“I’ll go out with someone when you finally tell James you love him.”

“Not happening, but I know someone you might like, he works for my brother. Bit of a politician, but more of a soldier, I think you two would hit it off.”

“I don’t know, I’m with Bill on this one. I mean, at least Bill’s been laid, you’re what now? Twenty? Almost twenty one? We all know how you look at James.” Tiago commented. “You’ve looked at him like that for years.”

“And you suddenly want me sleeping around?”

“Eh, kids have to grow up someday. Jason will be pissed, but hell, he isn’t your dad as much as he wants to pretend he is. James would be good for you.”

“True…but still.”

“Will talking to him kill you?”

“He might.” Q shrugged.

“Our baby is going to be alone forever at this rate.” Tiago sighed heavily.

“Maybe James will pull his head out of his ass and make the first move.”

“And you’re one of James’ friends, ha, not going to happen, Bill. Q just needs to go up to him and”

“Start a new game, 005.” Q shook his head. His phone ran and he lifted it to his ear. “This is Q.”

“ _009’s mission is going to hell, we need you now.”_

“On my way. 005, you’re driving, come on.”

“Dammit.” Tiago chased after Q who was already out the door, putting an earpiece in and working on his tablet.

800Q8

Twenty eight hours later, Q was sitting in a chair in medical, dozing slightly. Tiago gently put his hand on Q’s shoulder and Q jolted awake, looking up at him. “Why don’t you go home? There’s nothing you can do here.”

“I can’t leave him alone.” Q said, looking at 009 in the bed. The man was going to wake up with a knee blown to hell and a doctor telling him he could never do field work again…the least Q could do is stay by his side.

“You know it wasn’t your fault.” Tiago whispered, squeezing his shoulder.

“I know…I just… I don’t want him to be alone.”

“Okay.” Tiago gently kissed his forehead and took of his jacket, wrapping it around Q. “At least you’re going to stay warm, alright?”

“Yeah…”

“Try to rest, okay?”

“Mm-hm.” Q nodded.

“Call me if you need anything, kiddo.”

“Of course.”  Q nodded as Tiago left the room. Q looked down at his agent before he closed his eyes, falling into a light sleep.

800Q8

“Q?” 009 cleared his throat, it hurt and was far too dry. Q jolted straight up and looked down at 009.

“Shit, I’m sorry.”

“Water, please?”

“Of course,” Q got up and poured him a glass, bringing it back. “Small sips.” 009 listened and sighed in relief, leaning back.

“What happened? I remember an explosion than you on comms and then running, lots of running. I think you shouted something, I don’t know it’s all a blur.” Q hoped he’d rather hear it from him then the doctor, none of the double-os liked Medical anyway. Q sat down on the edge of the bed.

“Jason…”

“Oh God, what did I do? You never call me that.”

“I was yelling about a sniper, you nearly got out of the way, but he hit you.”

“Is that why there all the medicine?”

“They managed to save your leg, but you will not be returning to active service. They aren’t even sure you’ll be able to walk again.”

“What?”

“I’m sorry, if I would have seen them earlier.”

“Don’t, don’t do that to yourself. This is unacceptable.”

“I can try to find you something, but—”

“No, retirement was going to happen soon anyway, given the way my eyesight’s been headed, no, not walking will be unacceptable, if the leg won’t work we’re going to have to ditch it and get a new one. Have you ever made a leg before?”

“You are terrifyingly calm about this.”

“I know you’ve been changing the numbers on my medical exams and giving me prescription sunglasses, I’m not an idiot, I can tell when my vision suddenly gets better. I was going to have to retire soon, I was prepared for that, but I’ll be damned if I’m living with a bum leg.”

“I…”

“Hey, it’s not your fault, kiddo, and yes it’s horrible, but at least I survived to retire, alright? You did that, you got me here alive. And I may have gotten myself banged up, but I’ll be okay. I’ve seen the way other’s bow out of here and I don’t want that. I resolved to bow out gracefully a long time ago kiddo.”

“Doesn’t make me feel any better.”

“How about you make it up to me by trying to get me out of her early, yeah? And do you know any good doctors that I won’t want to blow the head off of?”

“I think I can call in a favor for you.” Q smiled, squeezed 009’s shoulder and pulling out his phone.

“Should I be worried that you have a doctor on speed-dial? Is our Q sick?”

“No, just well connected. John?”

_“Hamish, is something wrong?”_

“I’m alright. I was wondering if you could do me a favor. My friend’s got himself shot in the knee, I need someone who can deal with and sympathize with a wounded soldier.”

_“A double o?”_

“Yes.”

“ _Permanently out of the field I’m guessing?”_

“Yes, and a good friend of mine. I’d owe you one.”

“ _Figure out how to trick your father into talking with his parents and we’ll call it even.”_

“Deal. I’ll give you clearance, but be warned, M will notice and the questions likely won’t stop.”

_“I’ll be there in half an hour. Love you.”_

“You too.”

“And who was that?”

“Someone I owe a lot more than a favor to.” Q smiled. “I can’t get you out just yet, but I’ll get you out of here as soon as you’re physically capable, agreed?”

“Agreed. Aren’t you going to warn me to be nice to this person?”

“Hell no, he’ll kick your ass if he deems it necessary.”

“I’m a double-o.”

“He’s dealt with worse. I need to be at the door to escort him in.”

“Did my bag make it back?” 009 asked, sitting up slightly.

“No, sorry. Boom.”

“Dammit.”

“Was there something in it?” Q inquired.

“It two weeks until your birthday, I had tea in there.”

“I’ll be fine, it’s the thought that counts. I’ll be back.”

“See you, bof, and thanks for being here, kiddo.”

“You’re welcome.” Q nodded and left the room. Q met John a few minutes later at the front door.

“What am I looking at, Q?” John asked as Q escorted him in. Two guards started to move towards the pair of them.

“Touch him and I’ll destroy you. He’s got clearance. Hand here.” Q pointed to a pad and John put his hand down, green lights flashing before Q continued with him.

“How did you swing that so quickly? How did you get my handprint?”

“Lifted that years ago, just in case I ever needed you in here.”

“Lovely, Myc.” John said sarcastically.

“It worked.” Q shrugged. “Double-o was shot, bullet to the knee. He likely won’t be able to walk. I need someone who understands him and doesn’t annoy him to try to help him and no one in Medical fit the bill.”

“You’re very protective of your agents.”

“They’re like family. The sort of family you disown when fingers start getting pointed, but…family.”

“I’ll do my best.”

“I know you will.”

“Mrs. Hudson has decided to make you a cake.” John whispered.

“Of course she has, has she missed a year?”

“No… Grandma and Grandpa Holmes have decided to show up.”

“Bloody hell, please tell me—”

“Mycroft and Greg too.”

“Can I not show up?”

“And leave me alone to deal with all of them? Someone has to be sane aside from me. I won’t survive that many Holmes’ in one room.”

“Then run with me, we can be free of all of them, go to Tiago’s and watch crap telly. After all the times he’s crashed and/or passed out drunk at my place I’m sure one night won’t bother him.”

“Mycroft would hunt us down.”

“And go into a paranoid double-o’s house who would protect me with his life? No…I don’t think so, not after seeing Tiago’s record.”

“Is he that good?”

“Not the best of the double-os objectively speaking, but definitely not someone you would want to meet anywhere when he’s angry.”

“Who’s the best, objectively?”

“007, all things considered.”

“Isn’t that?”

“Shut up, I _did_ say objectively, so take my word for it.” John smirked.

“Alright.”

“He’s in here.” Q said before opening the door. The now ex-009 looked over at Q and smiled before glancing at John.

“This my savior.”

“I wouldn’t jump to that, but I’ll try to do what I can, but I can only put as much in as you’re willing to so don’t expect a miracle out of me unless your ass is willing to work for it.”

“I like him, Q.”

“I thought you might.” Q smiled. “I’ve got to get to work, goodnight. I’ll be back ‘round later to check on you, alright?”

“Thank you, Q.” Jason nodded and Q left him alone with John. “He’s a gem.”

“Isn’t he.” John smiled.

“How do you know him?”

“Family friend.” John sighed. “He’s always been a good kid.”

“He was a good kid…now he’s a good man. He’s grown up.”

“He has hasn’t he?” John smiled. “Alright, let’s try to figure out exactly what’s wrong with you alright? Then we’ll see how we can fix it.”

800Q8

“Are you alright, Q?”

“Yeah, I’m okay…how did you get in?” Q asked.

“Stole your key,” Tiago shrugged.

“And the passcode?”

“Hacked, oops. I wanted to make sure you were alright. I know you take the wellbeing of your agents seriously.”

“You have no idea. My papa is looking after 009. He’s going to try to make sure he gets good enough to walk again.”

“You never cease to amaze me, my friend. So giving all the time.”

“I do what anyone should do.”

“But no one would do it, no one but you.” Tiago sighed. “Do you want me to stay? We can watch telly and drink or smoke or whatever it is you need to unwind.”

“I smoke sounds amazing and some curry.”

“I’ll order in, pick something to watch won’t you?”

“What would I do without you?”

“Die alone in a gutter without a best friend to pull you back out.”

“Who says you’re my best friend?”

“You do.” Tiago chuckled, picking up the phone and searching for the menu in one of Q’s cupboards. Q smiled and flipped on Top Gear, settling down on the couch and loosening his tie, trying to relax.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	13. Three Agents MIA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bad things happen in China.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know... I'm being bad and spoiling you guys, but I couldn't just wait.  
> I had to do this. I'm sorry.

Three Agents MIA

 

Q spent the weekend of his twenty-first birthday with his family and when he returned to Q-Branch, it was to a full office. Boxes with bows and colorful paper filled the room. “Holy hell.” Q sighed walking into the room. Tiago peeked into the room and smirked.

“I might have let it slip that it was your birthday in an MI6-wide memo. And I also happened to mention that you’re the best Q we’ve ever had, and that you hadn’t had a proper birthday in years. I lied a bit, but it was fun.”

“I’m sending you out with nothing but a dunce cap next time.”

“Aw not even a squirt gun?”

“Get out of my office. AND IF THERE IS SINGING EVERYONE WILL PAY!”

“Love you too, bof!” Tiago smiled as he left, closing the door behind him. Q opened the first box and beamed at the cupcake inside it. It was the the same type of cupcake Q had brought into the last meeting. He’d brought two and snuck one to M, hoping that the meeting would be less draining with something sweet.

_Happy birthday, M. And don’t spend all bloody day opening presents. Work needs to be done._

“Love you too, M.” Q chuckled and bit in to the sweet, perfect cake before attempting to clean off his desk so he could get to work.

Two Weeks Later

“We can’t send 005 back into China, besides he’s undercover anyway, so we send another technological genius.” M said, nodding down at the file in front of her.

“Do you want me to volunteer, M?”

“If you think I’m not ordering you to go then yes, by all means, volunteer.” M scoffed. “But you’re going either way.”

“I think it’s best I volunteer.” Q sighed. “Who’s coming with me?”

“Agents 007 and a junior agent Chris Turney will be accompanying you.”

“Lovely. Have the double-os been informed or is there going to be a riot as I try to leave?”

“I’ve told the ones at home, the ones abroad don’t need distraction, and they’ve decided that if you’re hurt they’ll kill anyone and everyone that touches you, so…don’t get hurt. I don’t want to clean up mass murder.”

“Not murder if you have a license to kill.”

“Q—”

“Right, I’m going to get packed for China…and brush up on a few languages. I’ll just take the brief and go.”

“You’d better.” M nodded. “Be careful out there.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

800Q8

“You’re flying us?”

“Do you doubt me?” James asked, raising an eyebrow.

“No, it’s just I’ve seen how most of your flights end and I already don’t really like flying…too many parts and pieces that can fail.”

“Q, it’s not going to crash, trust me.”

“I trust you, ish.” Q sighed. James smirked.

“I could slip you some drugs, knock you out, if you want.”

“I’m not actually _that_ afraid of flying, I just feel uncomfortable. Thank you, but I’d rather be awake just in case something happened.”

“Can you fly?” James asked.

“No, but I can fix anything so that’ll count for something.” Q sighed, getting on the plane. James smiled gently and shook his head. In spite of his words, Q fell asleep in his chair, perfectly at ease, feeling completely safe in the air for the first and last time in his life.

800Q8

James got off three silenced shots and nudged Q through the door after Chris had gone through and out the other exit in the room. “Go, we’re watching out for you.”

“Thank you.” Q rushed into the room and got on the computer, quickly working. He could hear James outside and the voice in his ear when it all went silent, the screen turned off. “R? R?” Q pressed down on a spot in his forearm and no light came on. “Fuck, an EMP…” Q rolled his eyes. “So much for a clean job.” Q grabbed the tower and pulled it up, ripping off the casing. Something thumped on the ground and he looked up. Chris was on the ground, face bloodied and beaten. He was unconscious, hands tied behind his back. Q reached for his gun.

“I’ll kill him if you do and we’ll kill you, so I wouldn’t try it.” The man standing over Chris said in English. “Hands up.” Q slowly raised his hands and seven men followed him into the room. Q broke the nose of the man who attempted to grab him with his elbow and reached for his gun but a hand grabbed his wrist and twisted his arm behind his back before a cold blade pressed against his throat. “One move and you die and so does he, we’re not offering again. Walk.” They forced him out of the room, towards James. “Put the gun down or this one and your other friend dies.”

James whirled around, holding up his gun and freezing when he saw Q, a thin line of blood running down his throat as the blade pressed a little harder at the threat. “Let him go.” James demanded, his eyes icy with fury.

“You don’t get to order us. Gun down or he dies.” James swallowed, his icy eyes glaring at them before he dropped his gun. A gun whipped him over the back of his head and James fell, unconscious. “This is the third time in a year we’ve had British Intelligence trying to steal our secrets. What exactly are you looking for?” Q didn't look at him, didn’t even say a word. “We have ways to make you talk.”

“To make me scream, maybe.”

“I like him. Take all three of them.”

The lights went out in a burst of pain.

800Q8

“Then we need you to… Q? Q?”

“R, we just lost them.”

“What?”

“All three of them, no trackers, no nothing.”

“How can there be _nothing?”_ R demanded, her voice sharp, dangerous.

“All the power on the block just went out.”

“Son of a bitch, they know we’re there. Get them the hell out. We need extraction now.”

“Ma’am, extraction in twenty minutes.”

“Make them go faster, Q is in there.”

“Yes, Ma’am.” The minions were working at their full capacity.

Twelve minutes was the best extraction could do.

_“Extraction on site.”_

_“_ And _?”_ R demanded.

“Agents missing. All three agents MIA.” A voice said slowly a few moments later.

“Dammit.”

800Q8

“Sir, something’s come up in MI6,” Mallory commented, entering Mycroft’s office without permission.

“I’m a bit busy.”

“Agents Turney, 007, and _four others_ have been announced MIA in China.”

“What?”

“We all know what 'four other's' means sir. It's the term they use when they loose someone big and don't want the PM to know. I've checked, the only asset worthy of that cover up and is missing is...it’s Hamish, sir, I thought you should know.”

The cup in Mycroft’s hands fell to the ground and shattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.  
> (Don't kill me)


	14. Darkness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Waking up in prison is never fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How could I stop with such an amazing response?   
> It's going to get a bit...bleh. Also, it was going to be really, really dark, like a lot darker than you guys will see, so just be thankful that I was sobbing and in a very dark disturbing place that I couldn't stay in, because now it isn't going to be as dark as it would have been.

Darkness

 

James woke to the sound of water dripping slowly and soft breathing. His face was pressed against cold cement, as was his body…his clothes were gone. He slowly blinked his eyes opened and looked around. It was dark except for a small bit of light that came in through a small rectangular hole in the door in front of them, but even that light was muted. There were heavy metal shackles around his ankles. It was cold and the floor was slightly damp with water from a leaking pipe that ran to a small toilet above his head.

Their heads. He wasn’t alone.

James slowly sat up and his eyes landed on the shadow of a figure ahead of him. He didn’t dare say the name aloud, but he knew the shadow of messy hair well enough to know who they’d thrown in his cell with Q. James slowly slid forward, across the floor of the cell and gently touched Q’s shoulder. He was similarly disrobed, and cold, but he was breathing steadily enough.

“Hey…wake up… Hey…hey, come on, come on, you have to wake up.” James shook him and Q took a deep breath, jolting and ripping away from him.

“Wha—what…where am I?” Q asked, searching through the dark.

“Sh, you’re alright.”

“James, where—? Why am I not wearing clothes?” Q asked, wrapping his arms around himself.

“I suspect so we freeze. First line of torture, Quinton.” James said Q’s cover name and Q stiffened, remembering.

“Oh, that’s why I have a headache. I got hit in the head.”

“Is your head alright?”

“It’s all a bit fuzzy, but I’m okay. Is Chris alright?”

“Don’t know… We’re alone.”

“But he said he wanted all three of us.”

“Sh, it’s alright, let’s worry about one thing at a time. Are you alright?”

“I’m okay, my head hurts a little bit, my glasses are MIA and I think my legs are chained to the wall. How are you doing?”

“Headache, but I agree with you on the chain thing, mine are too. And there’s a pipe is dripping which is going to get annoying. You’re closer to the door, can you reach it?” Q slid across the door to the blurry slight, the shackles bit into his ankles and he stretched his hands as far as he could. His middle finger barely touching the metal.

“Steel door, thick, reinforced. No breaking it down… I can barely touch it myself and that’s stretched out.”

“Well, that’s convenient.”

“When do you suspect they’ll be knocking on our doors?”

“If I were them? A week.”

“A week?”

“A cold dark place like this drives most people insane. Breaks them quicker than physical torture.”

“Fun…” Q slid back across the room and curled himself into a ball against the wall.

“Good news is that our trackers will probably get us found soon enough.”

“Um…about that.”

“About what?”

“EMP…the EMP-proof trackers are still a work in progress and the ones under our skins are um…dead.”

“Fuck…” James sighed. “So we’re stuck until they can manually track us down.”

“Exactly…and we don’t even know if Chris is still alive.”

“He’ll be alright. We’ll be fine too. Someone will come for us.” It didn’t need to be said that James meant that they would be coming for Q, they both understood.

“So do you suspect we’ll get food?”

“Nope.”

“Lovely.” Q sighed, wrapping his arms around himself.

“You’ll get sick before the end of the week.”

“What?”

“You’ll get sick in this cold.”

“And?”

“I’m sorry, Quinton, but now isn’t the time for bashfulness. We’re both stuck here, and we’ll both need our strength for whatever they’ve got planned.”

“True.” Q was glad his blush hid in the darkness. Chains shifted against the ground and Q stiffened when James’ hand met his shoulder.

“It’s alright. It’s me.” James promised him.

“I hate being blind.” Q whispered.

“Don’t let it get to you, especially not now.” James whispered back.

“I know.” Q tried not to think about anything too much. Aside from a few communal shower incidents, and a time or two at a hospital, he’d never been naked in front of anyone before, and certainly not in front of anyone he’d ever cared about. It was going to be very strange. James didn’t seem phased at all, but he was considerate and gentlemanly as he twisted them around.

It must have been James’ protective instincts because James pressed Q’s back against the wall and practically draped himself against Q, forming a protective wall around the boffin. Within an instant it was warmer and Q felt safer. He knew James would do anything to protect him and that thought alone was enough to make him feel safe even with torture and death looming over his head.

“At least it’s warmer.” Q sighed. James let out a brief chuckle. “Seriously are you a space heater?”

“If you had more meat on your bones…” James trailed of, his jibe dying in his throat. The water dripping from the pipe above could at least keep them hydrated, but Q really was skin and bones. It wasn’t Q’s fault, even when he did eat (James knew that outside work, Q ate enough to feed a small army) he never retained any of the weight, his metabolism simply didn’t allow it. Q would lose strength and weight quickly. He’d get sicker easier. He’d die faster. James couldn’t allow that to happen.

“Not all of us are built like armored tanks.” Q jibed back easily. James didn’t comment and Q noticed the tension in his body. “What is it?”

“I’m just realizing what will happen if they leave us alone too long.”

“I’ll be alright.” Q whispered.

“You’d better be, for their sakes.” Q’s shiver had nothing to do with the chill in the air, but James pressed a little bit closer.

800Q8

Q went from semi-consciousness to wide awake when he realized he wasn’t where he was supposed to be. He opened his eyes to darkness, but someone was in front of him. He jolted and a calloused, warm hand gently touched his shoulder. “Sh, you’re alright.”

“James.”

“Sh… It’s just me.”

“I hate being blind.” Q muttered, his voice nearly unintelligible, even to James.

“It’s okay.” James promised.

“You’re so damn calm.”

“Not my first time, Quinton.” James reminded him.

“It’s not mine either.”

“What kind of hell did you grow up in?”

“I had a lovely life.” Q shook his head. “Just…a few issues with people is all. Have you slept?”

“Someone needs to stay up.”

“Any movement out there?”

“No…but I heard Chris, he’s in the cell across from us.”

“At least he’s alive.” Q sighed. James sat up, pulling his arms away from Q and Q wrinkled his nose at the cold air, how James was handling it, he had no clue. James returned a minute later with his hands cupped around water. James didn’t let Q waste any energy whenever possible. He knew he could take the cold and lack of food, but Q…he wasn’t sure about Q and Q’s brain alone was worth all of the double-os together. If anyone was getting out James needed it to be Q. He was going to make sure it was Q.

“Sit up just a little.” James could barely see Q’s outline move, until his curly hair caught the light from the door. He couldn’t imagine how it must have felt for Q to not really be able to see at all. “Don’t move, I’ll bring it to you.” The water tasted like it was more iron than water, but it was wet.

“You’d think they’d at least have better water.”

“Want a king-sized bed and chocolates on the pillows with that water?”

“Preferably.” James snorted and slid away again, drinking for himself before he came back and curled around Q: a living, breathing, security blanket. “We’ll get out of here.” Q told James matter-of-factly.

“You think?”

“Trust me.”

“Never steered me wrong before.”

“I would never lie.” Q promised. Q knew that Mycroft already knew he was gone. That meant that not only was MI6 searching for him, the British Government, and his parents were searching for him. They would be found and brought back. It was only a matter of time.

James knew MI6 would do anything to drag Q back, even if that meant leaving behind two agents. Somehow, he was alright with that.

“Get some rest, Quinton.”

“You should rest. I’m used to going without sleep.”

“Me too, you know.”

“I’ve slept enough.”

“Fine…wake me if you hear anything, got it?”

“Mmhm.”

“Okay.”

800Q8

“Sherlock, sit down and stay calm.” Mycroft commented.

“He’s my son.”

“Pacing won’t help you get to him. Calm down.” Sherlock was the only one pacing. John was sitting in his seat, staring straight ahead, his whole body taught. Doctor Watson was gone and the soldier had taken his place. Mycroft and Greg were looking through papers, trying to find anything that could be used to help get their nephew out of China with as little damage as possible. They knew that if John and Sherlock had their way, they’d get Q and leave half of China smoldering and that could only lead to war…which unfortunately they had to avoid. Luckily, the two of them managed to stay calm. Mycroft also had a laptop open, a line connecting him to MI6 as they frantically tried to find where their agents and Quartermaster had been taken to.

“I can’t.”

“Sherlock, sit down.” John said. His voice had a tone that he only rarely took and people never disobeyed—even Mycroft knew to listen to that voice. Sherlock sat down next to John and laid his head in John’s lap. John gently ran his fingers through his curls. “We’ll bring him home. We always have and always will. We’ll find him and destroy whoever touched him.”

“Unless we find another way.” Mycroft commented.

“They’re terrorists, they deserve it.” John snapped.

“I think we should be more worried about getting Q out safely than revenge. Get him home, take care of him, then go kill people after they’ve had time to forget.” Lestrade suggested.

“Far more satisfying to kill them now.” John shrugged.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	15. Drag Me to Hell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James tries to hold on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Torture: beatings, suffocation, drowning, whipping, and burning.
> 
> Sorry guys...not a fun one.

Drag Me to Hell

 

Chris was screaming across the hall at varying intervals. Chinese and loud angry sounds filled the space between screams. Q closed his eyes tightly and prayed for it to stop. He could never stand it, stand hearing any of his agents screaming. “Sh, he’s going to be alright. Sh, you can’t show weakness Quinton, sh.” Q took a deep breath and relaxed. If he were his father he would have deleted it, deleted Chris from his memory, but he wasn’t, so instead he just buried himself in his mind, hiding in the only way he knew how. “Good.” James smiled and pressed a kiss to Q’s forehead. “Good.”

Three days of screaming, but James wasn’t worried about that, he was worried about the feel of Q’s ribs under his hands as they slowly became more prominent. He was losing weight and shaking in the cold. It wasn’t a good sign. They never slipped them food, never once considered it even as shadows passed by their door. Q wasn’t going to last much longer without something. Iron water could only do so much.

“James, go to sleep, I’ll stay awake.”

“You need to rest.”

“I need food is what I need and since that isn’t coming I’ll stay awake, thank you though. Get some sleep.”

“Wake me if you hear anything.”

“Yup.” James fell asleep.

An hour later Q slipped off, exhaustion taking him with absolutely no warning. A pair of eyes looked through the door at the two of them and a voice whispered in Chinese to another. The lights went out completely outside and the door slowly, silently opened. Two men slipped behind James, as one went to Q’s feet and the other stood by his head. One placed a cloth over James’ mouth as the other yanked him back by his shoulders. James was awake and fighting the instant they touched him and Q woke with a gasp as a result. He tried to fight, but he couldn’t even see. His legs came free and he knew in an instant they weren’t taking James from him, they were taking him from James. Fear filled him.

“James!” Q shouted as they grabbed him by his shoulders and started to drag him away. He struggled, but he was weak and blind and the sudden movement had made him quite dizzy.

The last thing he felt inside the room was James’ calloused hand wrap around his ankle, trying to pull him back, trying to keep him safe, but he was torn away from that and the door slammed closed behind him.

His hands were bound as he was dragged and Q nearly collapsed as they hung him from the ceiling. The lights came on and Q closed his eyes, the brightness hurting.

The words in Chinese began to fill his head.

Q had two choices, act ignorant or respond. Field agents were more likely to have foreign languages under their belts than techs were. He responded as he was trained to: My name is Quinton Shaw. Nothing more, nothing less. They knew he worked with British Secret Service, they didn’t need to know anything else.

It didn’t stop them from asking though.

Q didn’t answer.

A bag wrapped around Q’s head and his body instinctively struggled, there was no chance at rational thinking as the air around him began to disappear. Just as his lungs were burning it left and he gasped for air. Air had never been so sweet.

Another question came and Q expected the bag again in punishment for his silence, but a cane came down on his back instead and he couldn’t help the shocked scream that left him. The next ten times the cane came down on his back he managed to stay silent.

Eyebrows raised in his direction at his sudden calmness and a bag was instantly over his head again. He didn’t take a breath, but then the cane landed on his back again and Q couldn’t help but gasp. The bag was inside of his mouth with a lack of air before they pulled it off of him again.

“Are you going to cooperate, Mr. Shaw?”

Don’t open your mouth, you’ll only say something that will piss them off more. Q warned himself, staying quiet.

“No?” He smiled. “I’ll see you tomorrow then.” He nodded and the cane was back as he left the room. His torturer not stopping until every inch of his back was turning black and blue and purple.

800Q8

James heard Q shouting and closed his eyes tightly praying for it to end. Q’s shouts ended after an unknowable time and a door opened before the door to his cell opened. “Back in the corner.” A voice unused to English ordered, pointing a gun at Q’s head as another chained his feet again and undid his hands. “If you want his suffering to end, you talk and it stops.” He said, letting go of Q who collapsed onto the ground. A second man dropped a plate of food on the floor before closing the door.

Only after their footsteps were gone did Q let out a small groan.

“Quinton…are you okay?”

“I’m not feeling quite at the top of my game, no.”

“Leave it to you to be snarky. What did they do?”

“Canning, my back… I don’t think there’s a white spot on it anymore. And uh, bags over my head, not the most pleasant feeling.”

“Are you going to be alright?”

“I should be alright… I’m tired.”

“Don’t go to sleep, not yet, food. You need to eat something.”

“Their using torture against me and me against you. Don’t let them. Don’t break, okay. I won’t either, just don’t you do it.”

“Okay.”

“They’ve made a judgement. Chris is silent and you’re the tough protector…which makes me the pressure point. It’s only logical. But that’s good, maybe they’ll stop torturing Chris…”

“Sh, stop thinking and eat, here. Eat slowly.” James moved and lifted the plate, moving to Q’s side, grabbing one of his hands gently and guiding him to the plate. The two of them ate in silence, James making sure Q ate most of the small meal, only eating as much as necessary to keep himself alive, giving the rest to Q. If Q noticed he didn’t say a thing. As soon as they were done James slid the plate away and gently helped Q lay down, trying not to disturb his back before curling close to him, trying to keep him warm.

“Alright?”

“I’m okay.”

“Try to get some rest.” Q buried his head against James’ chest and felt safe in those arms. He knew that as long as he was in James’ arms, he’d be safe, he’d be protected.

800Q8

Q woke to the door being unlocked and James crowding closer to him. A gun was pointed at both of them and Q was pried free and dragged off. He was dragged through the light hallway and into another room where he was promptly thrown into a tub of ice water. All the air left his lungs at the shock and strong hands held him down. He struggled, trying to get to the surface. Lungs burning, Q was ripped up by his hair. He took a deep breath and was shoved instantly back into the water.

Struggle and waste energy or stop struggling and piss them off for not suffering along with their plans?

He managed to make it somewhere in the middle and waited to be pulled back up. He was pulled back and left dripping as the tied him to the ceiling again. The man who had asked questions wasn’t there, just the torturer and another man.

There were no questions and Q could read from them that there wouldn’t be questions for him again. They’d deemed him obsolete. James and Chris were decidedly more mature agents, Q was the young blood that they would break to try to twist the others into talking. They’d spotted James’ protective instincts and they were going to push and push and push until he broke.

Q was quite sure the questions were being posed to James right now, with him as the back drop. He really didn’t want to scream, but then he felt hot iron press into his already bruised back and he couldn’t stop himself. His icy skin only made the burn more intense and his already aching skin broke and blistered.

His scream was choked, loud, and agonizing, the sound a wild animal would make when a trap clamped on their leg. Tears ran down his face and his chest heaved with his breaths. They lifted the iron bar and Q sobbed in relief and agony. Then a second one landed against his shoulder blades.

He screamed and thrashed, trying to escape, but the second man pushed him back against the heat.

Q missed Moriarty.

The thought echoed through his mind and he nearly laughed hysterically, but another heated rod touched the base of his spine before he could laugh.

How often could he say he missed a criminal mastermind that nearly took everything from him on multiple occasions?

Jim would have been proud and happy to feel so loved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	16. My Name is Hamish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q isn't sure he'll survive, but he wants someone to remember him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Discussion of forced rape, murder, and death, as well as a bit of gore.  
> Tissues and Earl Grey for everyone.

My Name is Hamish

 

Sherlock and John were searching through over a hundred square miles in southern China as Mycroft, Greg, and Gareth worked in Beijing, trying to arrange for the release of all three prisoners without starting a war. The Chinese government wanted nothing to do with the deal. The groups that terrorized other countries were endorsed by the government and they weren’t going to order the release of anyone that had tried to get in their way.

Mycroft left the room and instantly called M as Gareth and Greg walked at his side, both armed, just in case. “M, what do we have that we can barter for our people?”

“ _They didn’t even budge for you?”_ M asked.

“No, if they don’t mind their steps it could be all out war. We don’t have the time for war. We need to try to solve this diplomatically. Have you found their location?”

“ _Your brother has narrowed it down to two places, please tell me you’re going to cover the deaths he and his husband have caused. There have been at least thirty-seven bodies left behind them—and those are only the ones we can find. Some have been tortured—”_

“That would be my brother.”

_“And some have been shot dead at unbelievable angles.”_

“And that would be my brother-in-law. Of course, no one has to know, I suspect if you let your double-os out the body count would reach a few hundred. Think, what would be worth more to them than what they have?”

“ _Do they know what Q is?”_

“No, I didn’t reveal anything, just in case they don’t know. I’m not an idiot. I’m not giving them a reason to hurt him or keep him.”

_“We have an agent who was in deep cover in China, really pissed the government and most of their terrorist groups off, killed a lot of people. I think if we handed him over, we could make a deal.”_

“Where is he?”

“ _He’s undercover in Turkey, he doesn’t even know Q’s missing.”_

“Can you extract him?”

_“It will take time.”_

“How much.”

“ _A day probably, plus a few hours to fly him out. We won’t even tell him, we’ll just say he needs to meet with someone about a prisoner exchange. He’s a good agent but…not worth three others, especially when it’s Q and, frankly, 007 is the better agent. It’s the only way that presents few casualties.”_

“Do it, call me when he’s on the plane here, I’ll propose the deal. If they refuse I will make sure they pay for it.”

“ _Agreed. We’ll keep working to see which location is more likely for them to be held_.”

“Good, keep me updated.” Mycroft said, hanging up. He sent a text to Sherlock and put his phone away. Greg gently squeezed Mycroft’s arm and Mycroft smiled a sad, tired smile at him.

800Q8

When they were done with the hot iron rods, they started in with knives on his chest, whips on the backs of his legs. He screamed himself hoarse and fell into quiet sobs until they finally stopped and dragged him back into his cell. He whimpered as they chained his legs and went silent until they closed the door. Q sniffled and didn’t move. “Quinton?”

“Please tell me you didn’t say anything.”

“I didn’t.”

“Then it’s worth it, shut the hell up.”

“Okay…there’s food here.”

“I can’t…I can’t eat.” Q knew he would just throw it up (like the last time) and he wouldn’t let it go to waste if it meant James could eat. James moved across the room and gently touched Q. He didn’t touch his back, but then he felt blood on his chest.

“God…Quinton.” They both knew. The wounds would fester, they would get infected. Q would die if left unattended and quickly, but not painlessly.

“Want the good news?”

“What?”

“Those bastards don’t know anything, and you two are going to get out.”

“All three of us, Quinton.”

“Probably not. I don’t know if I can take much more. Pain is manageable but…bleeding out and infections…” His words were chopped up by shivers.

“You’re shaking, come on, got to at least keep you warm.” Q laid on his side, his wounds stretching painfully, causing him to whimper. James curled as close as he dare without touching him, hoping some heat would reach Q’s icy skin. “We’re going to get out of here, alright?”

“What if I don’t?”

“Quinton…”

“Can you do me a favor, James, please?”

“What is it Quinton?”

“My parents, I need you to lie to them. If I don’t get out of here, you lie. You tell them I went as peacefully as one can go in this situation, alright? You make them know it was worth something, please.”

“You have parents? I thought you were an orphan.”

“No… I need someone to know…I’m sorry. My name is Hamish Watson-Holmes. I think someone should know I exist just in case I won’t anymore.”

“Hamish?” James asked gently, running his fingers through Q’s hair gently, trying to sooth the poor man. Realistically, it would take a miracle for someone to arrive in time before Q got an infection that festered and killed him, if hypothermia and starvation didn’t do the job first. “Holmes…how do I know that name?”

“My dad is a detective, Sherlock Holmes.”

“Watson’s got a blog or something right?” James could tell that the talking was helping Q—Hamish—helping him calm down, so he encouraged it.

“Yeah…” Q nodded.

“So…your parents are gay?” It wasn’t accusatory, just curious.

“My dad is, my papa isn’t, my dad is the only exception to my papa’s heterosexual life.”

“Were you adopted?”

“No. My dad he is…was a carrier.”

“That’s rare.”

“Very, one in five-thousand men like him. He um had deleted it and then got really sick found out about me. Papa convinced him to keep me cause dad was afraid my life would be horrible. I was the light of their lives. They were so pissed when I got involved with MI6, but what else could I do with a brain like mine?”

“Holmes…is Mycroft related to you?”

“He’s my uncle. They’re looking for us right now. If my parents and uncles had to, they’d blow up the world to get me… They just don’t know where to strike…”

“They could be just outside, you know.”

“That’s a lovely thought.” Q sighed, resting his head against James’. “I just don’t want to die and be forgotten so quickly. I think someone should have known who I was.” Just thinking about his family felt bitter sweet. It was comforting in a way to think of them, but heart breaking. He hadn’t kissed Mrs. Hudson goodbye the last time he’d seen her, he’d rushed off for MI6 instead. He hadn’t told his Dad he loved him, they rarely ever said it, but he wished he’d said it. He hadn’t hugged his Papa. He hadn’t told Mycroft ‘thank you’. He hadn’t called Greg in too long. He hadn’t gone to Hamlet with his grandparents. He hadn’t taken Tiago and Tanner up on poker night. So many things he would have done differently.

“You’re not going to die. I won’t let you.” _And you would never be forgotten._ James added silently.

“Did you sneak some medicine in here, because that would be lovely?” James gently kissed his forehead, there was nothing else he could do.

“Sh…try to rest. I’ll be right here.”

“Please don’t break…no matter what.”

“I won’t. Sh…sleep.” James whispered, praying that Q would survive through his sleep, hoping the cold or blood loss wouldn’t take him.

800Q8

They both woke to bright light, their cell lit up for the first time. Q only twitched away from the light, James woke up and sat up, looking around. Q looked worse that James had thought. His back was one big bruise covered in angry blisters. His chest was sliced and still lazily bleeding, his legs were covered in welts and thin cuts. His body itself was sickeningly thin and frail. His eyes were sunken, his features gaunt. He had been skinny before, he looked like a skeleton now. The door opened and three men walked in. “We thought we’d all play together today.”

Q looked up at them blinking and then frowned. His body was broken, but unfortunately his mind still functioned well enough to see their plans. Physical beatings weren’t enough. They were going to strike mental and emotional.

Q knew exactly what they intended.

“No, please no.” Q pleaded in Chinese.

“You’re quick, you already know our plans. Adorable, but this isn’t for you to decide, you had your chance to talk.” He turned to James and smiled a sickly sweet smile. “You get to decide now who gets that pretty boy, you or us.”

“What?” James asked, his face paling.

“Judging by the look on your face, you know exactly what we mean. You have thirty seconds to choose before we all take turns and we will not be nice. I’d bet he’d scream real pretty for us, you may even have fun watching.”

Q thought it through quickly. It would hurt James, he knew it would, but he wanted it to be James. James would at least try to be gentle. James would at least care. He trusted James and he loved James. It would be rape either way…but somehow in a twisted way Q needed it to be James. The others had already carved out his flesh. They shouldn’t have this…the one thing that was still his own…the one thing he’d hoped to give to James one day anyway.

It was going to be painful, but this way he could see James as saving him from a worse pain and their captives as the enemy who caused it.

“James…”

“No, Quinton.”

“ _Please_ James.”

 _Shit._ James knew as soon as he looked at Q. The boy was a virgin. _Damn it all to hell._ He was going to hurt someone he cared about, someone he…loved wasn’t the right word, but there was no other word. “I’m sorry.”

“I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	17. No!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James shatters a bit and three hours tick by for a new deadline with worse consequences.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Rape is still hanging about in here.
> 
> Hang in there, guys. And don't stone me.

No! 

 

Q for his part didn’t cry. James did and promptly pushed himself as far away from Q as he possibly could when it was done, burying himself in his knees. He wasn’t supposed to hurt good people. He especially wasn’t supposed to hurt good people like Q, Q who had always been there for him, who had been an anchor for him when the world was going to hell, who had taken care of him better than anyone ever had. He had stolen the innocence from Q—Hamish. He had hurt his Quartermaster, his friend…and he couldn’t take it. Everything inside of him was eating at him, everything James was despised him.

“You have three hours to decide if you want to talk, before we come back and have him ourselves.” The man bent down and kissed Q on the cheek--James nearly threw up--before shoving him to the ground. Q whimpered in pain as the door closed and the lights went out.

“James.”

“Don’t.” James wouldn’t let Q hurt again, not if he could stop it. Enough damage had been done.

“James, please. I don’t want to be alone. It’s so dark. They grab you in the dark. Please? Don’t leave me alone in the dark.” James slowly moved across the room at Q’s broken voice, but didn’t touch Q. Q reached out blindly and touched James’ leg, holding onto it with tired fingers.

“I’m so sorry.”

“James…it’s okay.”

“It is anything but okay.” Tears were in James’ voice, Q had only seen and heard them a few times. He tread carefully.

“They did this, not you. I asked you to do this, okay?”

“You had a bad choice and a worse choice. It hardly makes a difference. You were still—” James couldn’t even finish the sentence.

“It does to me, and that’s all that matters, you need to forgive yourself I already have. Please…just stay with me. I can’t be alone. I can’t.”

“Okay…” James whispered, laying down next to Q on the cold hard ground. Q reached out and clung to James’ shoulder.

“Don’t leave me.”

“I won’t.” He was never going to let Q get hurt again, no matter what the cost.

800Q8

“I’m going to offer you a deal in return for our three captured agents.” Mycroft extended.

“I told you, we want no part.”

“Tiago Rodriguez in return for the three of our agents you hold imprisoned.”

“Tiago Rodriguez?” He asked with wide eyes. Mycroft passed a picture to the man.

“I believe you know him.”

“Yes…I do.”

“You can have him and do anything you want to him without any retribution, we won’t come back, just give us our agents back.”

“Deal.”

“You tell us where they are and we make the trade there. You don’t get him until all three of our agents are safe. And whatever you’re doing to those agents stops now.”

“Agreed.”

“Call them and order them to stop now.”

“Of course.”

800Q8

Q and James clung to each other, Q silently counting in his head. Three hours passed and Q tensed, waiting, but nothing happened, no sound, no movement, nothing. Twenty more minutes passed before he was brave enough to speak. “James?”

“What?”

“It’s been three and a half hours. Why aren’t they here? They’ve never lied before.”

“Just be thankful and pray it stays that way.” James whispered, stroking Q’s hair gently. James had faced all sorts of torture, but this was the worst and he hadn’t even really been touched. He just couldn’t sit back and watch someone he cared about take the beating for his silence. It hurt, more than any physical blow ever had.

“But it doesn’t fit the pattern, something’s wrong.”

“Or incredibly lucky. Sh…try to rest.”

“It’s okay…I know I’m safe.” James was sure Q was half-delirious, especially if he felt safe with James there. James had caused him pain, hadn’t been able to keep him from torture, and had caused it in his silence. How in the hell could he feel safe?

Impossibly, Q sighed and fell asleep.

The door to the cell opened and James looked up, wincing closer to Q, wishing he could protect the man. “You’re in luck. You just got a ticket out of here.”

“What?”

“A trade, if you make one wrong move, all three of you die, understand?”

“How do I know you’re not lying?” James demanded.

“They said you’d be skeptic. Here.” A man handed a phone to James and he held it to his ear.

“007.”

“ _Bond, it’s M, is Q alive?”_

“Yes ma’am, but very, very injured.”

_“We have medical, don’t make a fuss and get him out of there, Bond.”_

“Yes, ma’am.” James nodded and handed the phone back. The men threw two pair of sweatpants at James and one slowly undid the shackles on their ankles.

“Get him up.” James slowly turned and touched Q’s head gently.

“Quinton.” Q slowly opened his eyes and jumped back, away from the others with a fear he hadn’t shown towards James. “Sh, I’m going to get us out, alright? We’re all going home.” James promised.

“Please tell me you didn’t—”

“Sh, I didn’t say a word. Don’t move, I’m going to try to put this on without hurting you.” Q was nearly too exhausted to cry as James slipped on the pants, but a few tears leaked out soundlessly. James slipped his on and helped Q up, supporting the bulk of his weight.

“What about…?”

“Sh, he’s here, we’re all here, just let me get you out.” Chris looked beaten, but his eyes landed on Q and he winced.

“I wondered why they stopped torturing me… Fuck, he looks like he’s dead.”

“Not if I have anything to say about it.” James snapped, silencing Chris as they made their way up a set of stairs. Q fumbled and started to fall. “No…” James caught him. “This is going to hurt, stay with me, Quinton…” James picked him up and Q’s whole body tensed at the pain. “Sh, it’s almost over.” Eight flights later they left a door and stepped out into the sunlight, smelling ocean air. Q blinked his eyes open and saw a helicopter and smiled faintly. He could see his uncle in the front seat and that made him happy.

Then his eyes met the unconscious man on the ground that was being dragged towards the prison as he was carried towards the helicopter.

“Tiago?” Q called, his eyes widening. It was an exchange: China’s most wanted for three British spies. “No! Tiago! NO!” His best friend was being dragged into the hell he’d just escaped from.

“Quinton, no, there’s nothing we can do.” James whispered.

“They can’t. They can’t do this. James! We have to go back! Please!”

“Sh, sh…” James whispered.

“No! They can’t! Tiago. Not him, please. They’ll destroy him.” Q struggled against James’ hold, but James held him tightly.

“They would have destroyed you. I know it hurts Quinton, but you’re more important. We all know that. Come on…we’re almost free.”

“Please, we have to do something.”

“Sh…come on. I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” James strapped Q into the helicopter even as he feebly struggled. Chris and James got strapped in and they took flight. As soon as they were up and steady a short blonde man unbuckled and reached into a case. James didn’t know him, but he watched as the man gently stroked Q’s hair and knew they knew each other somehow.

“Sh, it’s going to be alright…” He slipped a needle into Q’s arm and pushed down the plunger. Q grabbed James’ hand before he slipped into unconsciousness. “Mycroft tell that pilot of yours that if we aren’t at the plane in fifteen minutes I’ll kill him. Q needs medical attention and he needs it yesterday.”

“Yes, John.” Mycroft called back.

“You’re going to be alright… I promise.”

“Watson?” James asked.

“Yes, why?”

“He told me.”

“Oh…well… Do you know everything that happened to him? I going to need to know so I can make sure everything is treated.” James swallowed and nodded.

“He was suffocated, beaten (I suspect at least one broken bone from that), whipped, cut, half-drowned in ice water, burned, left in the cold, untreated, he’s only eaten once since we were taken in, he’s vomited, and um…he was raped.”

“The mother fuckers.” John shook his head.

“It was me…I…” John looked up at him and narrowed his eyes. “It was me or them…he asked for me. I’m so sorry… I tried to be as careful as possible but they weren’t necessarily generous with their time. He might have internal injuries. I didn’t want to…”

“Sh, I’ve been in war, son. I know the things they do to you. You probably saved him a lot of pain. I’m not going to blame you. I do have to ask you if you’re clean though.”

“Yes, I am.”

“Okay…well that could have been much worse. We can figure this out… Are you alright?”

“Mentally and emotionally? Fuck no. Physically, weak, starved, dehydrated, and exhausted. I’ll live.”

“Alright.” John whispered before he turned to Chris. “What’s the damage done to you?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much love.


	18. Waking Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q goes in and out of sleep, he misses his protector, and he has a heart-to-heart with Uncle Myc.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cried when I wrote the part with Mycroft...   
> I have feelings too...just in case anyone wondered. I'm not as heartless as I seem.

Waking Up

 

Q woke up in an unfamiliar space, white above him, everything around him blurry. “James. JAMES!” Instantly there were hands on him.

“Sh, sh, you’re alright.” John whispered, gently stroking his son’s hair. “You’re okay. Your dad and I are here.”

“Where’s James?” Q asked hyperventilating.

“Sh, he’s across the hall being treated. Chris is safe too. You’re all safe, you’re home.” Sherlock soothed.

“What about Tiago?”

“We had to do something. I’m sorry.” Sherlock said slowly.

“Where’s James and Chris? I need to see them.”

“They’re alright, they’re safe. You need to sleep, you are really injured and being worried isn’t helping you.” John soothed him and gently turned up a medicine level. “How’s your pain?”

“I don’t feel anything.”

“Good…you’re going to go to sleep again, but we’re right here.”

“I don’t want it to be dark. I don’t like the dark.” Q would have been on the verge of a panic attack, had drugs not been relaxing every inch of him.

“Sh, we’re right here.” John whispered.

“I’ll make sure you have a pair of glasses brought for when you wake up again, alright?” Sherlock offered. “And we’ll never turn off the lights.”

“Make sure they are okay.” Q pleaded with his papa.

“I will…I will, you have to rest now.”

“Don’t like the dark.” But the darkness took him as his eyelids became too heavy for him to hold back.

“Acute Stress Disorder, but I suspect it will move into PTSD in a few weeks. Why did you tell him James and Chris were down the hall?”

“Sometimes lying is better.” John commented. James wasn’t in Medical anymore. He’d been discharged after three days. Chris had been discharged three days later. Q had been in Medical for two weeks. His room was full of cards and gifts. Everyone had been in to look in on him, except James. James stood outside the door and looked at Q, as if making sure he was really alive, before he left again. He never came in, never got near enough to touch him. Sherlock deduced that James was terrified of hurting him. “He needs to know they’re safe, so I told him they were close so that he felt better. He was on the verge of a panic attack.”

“He’ll be alright, John.” Sherlock promised, squeezing John’s shoulder.

“Have you had PTSD? It’s awful… Our poor boy…”

“He’s a Watson, he’ll be strong. Everyone knows strength doesn’t necessarily come from the Holmes side of the family. It comes from you…if he’s anything like you, he’ll be okay. It’ll be hard, but he’ll pull through.”

“You know that’s sentiment right.”

“I figure I can afford some for you two.” Sherlock shrugged. John turned and hugged him, Sherlock wrapped his arms around John and pressed a kiss to the top of his head. “He’ll be alright, I promise.”

800Q8

Q opened his eyes and looked through his glasses, blinking before turning his head towards the only sound in the room. Mycroft was sitting at his side, looking through files. He slowly looked up and smiled gently at Hamish. “Hello, Hamish. Water?” Mycroft got up when Hamish nodded and brought back a small glass. “Little sips, you father tells me. Before you ask I sent them both home. They were a bit conspicuous, especially since we’re trying to hide your identity and also because they were nearly dead on their feet. Gregory’s with them, if that makes you feel better.” Hamish put the glass down.

“Thank you.” Hamish said, finally.

“For what?” Mycroft asked, confused.

“Remember when dad committed suicide?”

“Hard to forget.” Mycroft scoffed.

“When he came home, papa was so furious. He took me and moved us across the city. He wouldn’t let me see dad. I didn’t have money and it was so cold… I couldn’t get a taxi and I was so damned determined to see dad…it had been so long. So I stole a car…nearly got to Baker Street before the police got me. They weren’t fans of my dad, arrested me and took me straight to a holding cell. They didn’t call my parents or offer me a call, but you showed up ten minutes after I arrived. You cleared my record, didn’t tell my parents, and took me to see my dad. I never said thank you. I was dying and thinking of my family…and all I could think about was how sorry I was that I never thanked you. So I’m saying thank you, so much.” Before Hamish was one of the rarest sights in the world, Mycroft with tears rolling down his cheeks, silently. Mycroft gently smiled and cupped Hamish’s cheek before pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead.

“You’re welcome. I’d do anything for family, you know that.” Mycroft nodded, pulling away and straightening, wiping his face as properly as only he could. “If you tell anyone—”

“Uncle, I don’t think I can get much worse.”

“True… How are you feeling?”

“Alright, tired. Everything in my head is all wrong and I know it… I can’t fix it. It’s like a hurricane swept through my mind leaving it all in pieces and taking a few away. I’m afraid. I’m waiting for that door to open. I’m waiting to wake up and find myself back in that cell. I… I’m not right, I’m not. And this place doesn’t feel real.”

“I think you’ll find going home will be good for you. I’ll arrange the psychologist to see you if you’re up for it. If you talk to them you can go home. I’m sure your parents will be able to look after you.”

“What about Tiago?”

“I realize he was a friend, but there’s nothing we can do, Hamish. You’ve been out nearly three weeks, only awake off and on and not coherent when you were… A week ago all of Tiago’s vital signs flat lined. He’s dead. I’m sorry…but we had to get you out. I had to get you out. It was our only option as nothing else worked. It was Tiago Rodriguez or war.” Mycroft frowned and grabbed Hamish’s hand, Hamish jerked his hand back and Mycroft held up his hands. “If it makes you feel any better, he did not suffer for long.”

“But he suffered. He shouldn’t have.”

“M asked me to call her down when you were alert, are you alert enough?”

“I suppose I am…but I think I’ll try to kill her if I see her.”

“I’ll relay that then.”

“Have someone from psych prepared as well, I want to go home…somewhere safe as soon as possible.”

“Of course. Be mindful, you have three fractured ribs and scars as well as a few lingering wounds that will make moving unpleasant.”

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

800Q8

“I’m sorry…you want what?” John asked Q. Q sat in his chair, not moving. Fractured ribs made breathing hurt, let alone running around his house.

“The bed in my room, I want it pressed against the wall.” Q clarified. Sherlock looked confused, but John understood. Q wanted to put his back against a wall. He wanted to be able to see any threat that came after him.

“Come on, Sherlock. You’ll be alright?”

“I’ll be fine.” Q nodded watching as his parents walked up to his room. A few minutes later they came back downstairs and sat across from Q.

“Feel better at home?”

“I wish I could work… M said no work until psych cleared me, that’s not going to happen soon.”

“Then we’ll find something for you to work on.” Sherlock shrugged. “There has to be something.”

“Jason’s missing a leg.”

“They got rid of it?”

“There was no therapy in the world to save it…we tried it’s just…irreparable. He thought you could make him a better leg than his original.” John smiled gently. Q sat in thought for a moment before grabbing a pen and paper. He wrote a list in silence and handed the paper to Sherlock.

“I need those parts…have someone ask R at MI6, have them tell her it’s for my sanity and she’ll make sure I get them. If you show up she’ll put two and two together, she’s clever. Papa, I need you to tell me to the millimeter the amount they cut from his leg and I need every book on legs and every book on electrical signals sent from the brain and the electrical signals nerves receive. I need as much detail as you can give me.”

“Alright.” John nodded.

“Can you two…stay the night? I don’t want to be alone.”

“Of course, as long as you want.”

“You have medicine to help you sleep.”

“I don’t want to sleep. It’s dark.”

“You’ll have to sleep at some point.”

“Not tonight.”

No one argued with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	19. Alone and Surrounded

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jason is amazing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this took so long. I'm not feeling too well.

Alone and Surrounded

 

Q didn’t sleep for four days after that and neither John nor Sherlock pushed him to. They simply sat with him on the floor as he researched for his next invention. He asked John questions about anatomy and brain and nerve functions and John would answer. He’s ask Sherlock about different strides and even used him as a test dummy, feeling how his muscles in his thigh moved as he moved his lower leg. It was distracting and that was good.

Tanner came to the house every morning with tea and pastries. He didn’t know what else to do, but Q gave him a tired, forced smile anyway and took them gratefully. Tanner was the best of his visitors. He was thoughtful and upset, but not too gentle with Hamish. He didn’t freak out if his thumb accidently brushed Q’s hand and he wasn’t afraid to place a gentle kiss against his forehead.

The double-os really didn’t know what to do with him.

001 visited bringing chocolates and a very gentle voice that didn’t really work on him. He didn’t know what to say or do…so it ended up mostly being fidgeting… Q was grateful he cared enough to visit…but the fidgeting only served as a reminder.

002 came in with loose-leaf tea and a board game, “you know, just in case you’re bored.” It had been another awkward moment, but the two of them had played a game of Cluedo with Sherlock and John upstairs, hidden from view, but still close enough if Q had needed anything.

003 had actually brought groceries and made Q the best soup he’d ever had, but there was an awkwardness and pity to it that was…just sad.

004 had brought flowers and her best smile. She’d actually done the best at trying to be cheerful rather than wallow-y. She’d tried to bring light into the house—not that the lights ever turned off (Q would scream and scream when the lights were turned off). She had even helped Q tinker with the leg he was working on.

There was no 005.

Alec had bought him a book to read with “no torture in it I swear, but…there is some sword fighting and…mm maybe not the best choice, there’s a bit of gore in it after all. I’m an idiot sorry.” Q had rolled his eyes and taken the book, insisted that Alec couldn’t take back a gift. Q read it in two days and texted him that it was a good book.

008 had mothered him, but not in an over-bearing way. She’d been sweet and gentle while not coming off as pitying and afraid of hurting him.

009 was a newly promoted junior agent named Elijah Ronson. Q had handled Eli once or twice, so Eli stopped just for a moment to deliver a get-well-soon trunk load of gifts from Q-Branch. He had been brief and gentle, but not condescending.

Chris had shown up and thanked him for not talking, for not falling apart. They were silent for a few minutes, but it was an understanding silence, before Chris asked if Q needed help. Q smiled a small smile and let him help.

Jason visited and Q had hidden the plans for his leg even as the man crutched his way into his home. Jason was probably the nicest to have around. He understood. He’d lost something he valued, his mobility, his job, his life… He knew what it felt like and didn’t look at him with pity or sorrow, but with some level of respect. A sort of way that said: “I know you are in agony. I know they took some things from you that you can never get back, but look at you, kiddo. You survived, just look at that kiddo. You survived and you held your own and you didn’t say anything to them. You did good, son, and it’s okay to hurt now, it’s okay to be upset, but deep down, know you’re a survivor and a fighter and in the end you’ll be alright. I’m here for you too, kiddo.”

It didn’t need to be said, but it was there and Q appreciated it. He was hurt. He’d lost his virginity, his rationality, his peace of mind, and even a chuck of his mind if the state of his mind was anything to go by. His mind wasn’t like his father’s or his uncle’s. It wasn’t a palace or a castle or a bungalow or anything like that. It was a computer. A massive, massive computer and he saved files in different folders and danced along wires to retrieve them when he needed them. He didn’t save them on a screen and click on them, he saved everything he saw and learned in code.

There was a virus in the system ever since he’d been captured.

He was afraid of the dark.

He was afraid to be alone.

He didn’t feel safe.

Sharp movements made him panic.

He couldn’t touch the stove without fearing it would burn him.

He could only take showers, not baths.

The dripping faucet in the kitchen scared the hell out of him, so he always had music playing to drown the sound.

His mind played an endless loop of his friendship with Tiago and at the end he wasn’t unconscious, he was awake and looking at Q with hurt, confused, and then angry eyes. He couldn’t fight back, his firewall had been broken and there was no fighting he could do.

He missed James. He didn’t feel safe without him around. He couldn’t sleep without someone holding onto him, promising him that he would be alright, that he would be safe. Q considered having Sherlock buy a bottle gun oil and soaking his pillow in it so that he could sleep.

“You okay, kiddo?” Jason asked, still holding out the cup of tea that he’d had in his hand for nearly ten minutes.

“What? Oh…um, sorry, lost in thought.”

“Alright, kiddo… Need to talk?”

“I miss James.”

“Not Bond huh?”

“Jason…”

“I know, I know… He hasn’t come to see you?”

“He probably hates me now… I just…broken.”

“He doesn’t hate you, Q.” Jason insisted. “He hates himself, not you. You have to understand, we agents we are all vastly protective, James is probably the most protective out of all of us and all of us care about you a lot. He feels he should have protected you. In his mind his silence caused you all of this pain. I suspect if he had to do it all again he would sell out his whole country and everyone in it if it meant sparing you pain.”

“He couldn’t.”

“He probably would. He’s angry at himself, not you, and you’re not broken, just a bit bruised.”

“My ribs disagree with you.”

“You know what I mean… He feels like a failure and an awful person. He’ll come around, alright?”

“It’s been weeks and I haven’t even seen him or heard from him.”

“Well, that’s James for you. He disappears for months when he’s in a mood, but he always comes back. Besides, he was watching over you while you were sleeping in medical, so all hope isn’t lost.”

“He was?”

“I think he was afraid to let you out of his sight, to be honest.”

“I just don’t feel safe. He was always there and I knew he couldn’t protect me, but I felt safe. I don’t feel safe anymore.”

“How long has it been since you slept?”

“Only when I just can’t keep my eyes open anymore.” Q shrugged.

“Because you don’t feel safe?”

“You read the reports?”

“No actually, M’s got this thing about me sneaking into Six.”

“They kept us in the dark…they took my glasses, I couldn’t see, but I could feel James next to me. They’d come in in the dark and drag me away. I couldn’t see I couldn’t fight. Sleeping is like allowing the darkness to win again, only…I’m all alone.”

“No one to protect you… You must feel exhausted.”

“I’ve never want to sleep more or less. Funny, I could sleep imprisoned…now I’m terrified to wake back up in there.”

“How about we get you some sleep then?”

“What?”

“Do you trust me? Would I let anything happen to you? Would I let anything hurt you?”

“No…” Q shook his head.

“No to which one?”

“The last two.”

“Okay…let’s try to get you some sleep alright?”

Q fell asleep easily for the first time since he’d come back, crowded against the back of his sofa, with Jason lying next to him. Jason never went to sleep, he simply lay there, glad that finally his Quartermaster was sleeping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	20. Never Enough

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Psych, Q-Branch, and M...Q gets to visit all of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you like it.

Never Enough

 

Q was called in for another psych evaluation and was led into an interrogation room. He flinched when the door closed and his knuckles went white as he watched a doctor he’d known for years sit down across from him. “Are you alright, Q?”

“Can we open the door, please?”

“I would like not to, I know it is causing stress, but you’re safe here. Is it going to be a problem?”

“I…I’ll be fine.”

“Okay. How’s everything been, tell me how you’ve been spending your days?”

“I stay at home with a few…friends looking after me. One is a doctor so they make sure I take my medicine and make sure my side doesn’t hurt too much. I spend most of my time building things and drinking tea. Not much different from working here.”

“How is eating going? Are you getting sick anymore?”

“Not so much. I have been fine for a few days now.”

“How much are you eating?”

“Um…twice a day…maybe eggs and toast and soup or something like that for dinner.”

“Is that more or less than what you used to eat before the incident?”

“If I was working on a mission, more…but normally I ate quite a lot more. I have a fast metabolism.”

“What are you building?”

“A leg, for Jason. He needs to walk again and I think I can make a leg that reacts to the natural signals from nerves in what’s left of his leg so that it fully functions and reacts as a real leg would. I’m getting very close considering the tests.”

“Have you told him?”

“Don’t want to get his hopes up.” Q shook his head.

“How are you doing?”

“Better, I think.”

“How do you feel about James Bond?”

“He’s an ass.”

“Is that because—”

“No, I’ve told you. I don’t see it like that. No matter what part went where or whose it was _he_ didn’t rape me. They did. It’s hard to explain.”

“It’s okay… So why is he an ass?”

“He won’t even look at me or talk to me or…anything. If I didn’t hack into MI6 I wouldn’t even know where he was.”

“And you’ve hacked in?” 

“I get bored.”

“Why do want him to talk to you?”

“I miss him. He was my friend before all of this and…”

“And? Be honest, Q.”

“It makes me feel worth less than before. I feel cast aside and it hurts. We used to at least talk once in a while…now it’s like I’m too broken to be around.”

“I’m sure that isn’t true… You seem fidgety. Are you scared?”

“I don’t like confined spaces.”

“But you’re doing better, last time you couldn’t have the door closed.”

“I suppose so.”

“Don’t down-play you’re strength, Q, you’re getting better.” The psychiatrist sighed. “Anything else you don’t like?”

“My faucet drips and I don’t like the dark.”

“And the reasons behind that doesn’t change?”

“No.” They spoke for a while longer before the doctor smiled.

“Alright, well, it sounds like you’re improving, but I think you should spend a little more time alone, independent. You had 007 to lean on throughout the ordeal and now you are leaning on your friends. I think, slowly, you need to work on being able to hold your own, sound alright?”

“Yeah…”

“Okay, now I have one more subject to talk about… How are you dealing with the death of agent 005?”

“I’m angry.”

“Why?”

“Because he didn’t deserve that death or that pain. He was a good man and a very good friend. I still don’t get it. You sold out a fully functioning agent for a Quartermaster who’s shattered to hell according to his psych files and—”

“Those are private.”

“If you want something private from me, put it on paper and keep it away from cameras. Oh and add paranoid to the list of ever growing problems I'm facing, won’t you?”

“You don’t like feeling ‘broken’, do you?”

“No, I don’t. What’s the point of me if I can’t be me? Tiago shouldn’t have…”

“Who are you angry with?”

“Mostly, M. A few weeks ago I might have killed her, but now I know that won’t do anything.”

“You blame her?”

“It was obviously her idea. While I know the other person responsible, the idea didn’t originate in his mind, it was hers.”

That just opened a whole can of worms and Q couldn’t wait for the questions to end so he could get out of the chilly, stone room.

800Q8

“Sir?" A minion asked with wide eyes. "R, look.”

R turned from the main station and smiled. “You’re not supposed to be here, but if you want to, we’ve got a few things that need a smarter touch than what I’ve got.”

“Just for a few minutes.” Q shrugged, walking forward and beginning to work. It felt peaceful to be back at work, effortless. The minions smiled and one of them got up as the rest of them got back to work. A few minutes later a clink made Q jump back.

“Sorry, overlord…I just got you some tea.”

“Oh…thank you.” Q frowned. It felt awful looking so frightened in front of those he was supposed to lead. The girl smiled at him understandingly and patted his shoulder.

“Good to see you back, overlord.”

“I’m not back.”

“But you’re here. We miss you. R’s good but…well, you’re better and bring sweets on Fridays.”

“You don’t bring sweets on Fridays?” Q asked R with wide eyes. “What are they working for then? Just money and world domination? That’ll never do.”

“We’ve been a bit busy, overlord.” R stated.

“Busy people still deserve sweets. I’ll make sure to have some sent up while I’m…away.” Q commented, taking a sip of his tea. “That good tea, thank you. Loose leaf?”

"Yes."

“Thank you even more.” Q sighed before he got back to work.

They all worked as a unit, no one talked to Q with pity, no one treated him differently. Everything was normal, except that they called out Q before they approached him so that he knew they were coming. It was nice. It wasn’t perfectly normal, but for an hour everything seemed calmer.

“You are supposed to be off the premises, I'll have you escorted because you can’t seem to leave under your own power.” Q went tense at M’s voice and slowly turned around. M didn’t see Q often enough face-to-face to know the difference between his frustrated face and his furious face.

“Q, don’t—” R started, but Q’d already back handed her. For the first time M didn’t say anything. She was speechless.

“Don’t you ever, ever give up any of _my_ agents again. You should have sent someone back for him. You should have never let him go. There were a million ways to get him back and you didn’t.”

“Q…” R said gently, grabbing his shoulder. “I’ll take you home alright?” Q nodded at her and they slowly walked towards the door.

“I’m sorry.”

“That will never be enough, M.”

“Let’s get you home, Q.”

“Thank you, R.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MuchLove


	21. A Leg Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jason gets a surprise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's late.  
> But you'll get to see James next chapter so...yeah. :D

A Leg Up

 

Jason arrived at Q’s house and knocked, just so Q knew he was coming in—on the very slight chance that he wasn’t in front of his computer, watching him approach. “Come in!” Q shouted.

“It’s locked.”

“You’re fucking MI6!” Q snapped back teasingly, too busy to bother with getting up.

“Ex, and security better be down.” Jason muttered and there was a noise at the door before Jason opened it and stepped in, locking it behind him. “Thanks for taking down security, Q.”

“No problem.” Q said before patting his sofa with one hand.

“You look a little better, still tired but…you’ve been eating.”

“I have been eating, I’m…better. Not good, not alright, just…better. I finished something and… I don’t want you to get excited, it’s just a prototype and it may not even function the way I intend. It may not function at all, so don’t get too…hopeful. I just…I needed to do something…so…” Q got up and crossed the room, picking something up and wincing at the pain it caused in his side before he set it in front of Jason.

“A leg? You built me a leg…”

“I intend it to be fully functioning as well. Are you willing to be a bit of a lab rat?”

“I trust you.”

“I don’t have a pristine place like medical, but would you mind sitting on the table? It’s not going to fall.”

“Trousers off too, I’d expect.” Q flinched and paled. “I’m sorry, I meant…you know…for what’s left of my leg…sorry, Q…shit.” Q took a few deep breathes and calmed himself. He had to remember that he trusted Jason.

“Yes, but…just the trousers…”

“I’m sorry about that kiddo.”

“It’s okay…it’s just…sorry. It’s me, not you.”

“It’s trauma, and I understand, okay… I have a better idea.” Jason took scissors to his trousers (in an epic show of balance for someone with one leg, one crutch, and a pair of scissors), cutting them so that the portion left of his leg was showing. “Better?”

“You…yes… Thank you.”

“No problem kiddo.” Jason said, half-hopping to the table and pushing himself up onto it. The crutch fell and smashed against the ground.

“Smooth.” Q half-chuckled, bringing the leg with him along with a small ‘gun’. He put the leg down on the table and slipped a magazine into the gun.

“Is that a modified tracker injector?” Jason asked.

“Yes, I have it programed so that it puts enough force to send each sensor to the right spot. It’ll…probably hurt.”

“So did losing a leg, I’ll be fine.”

“Sure?”

“I trust you kiddo.”

“There’s…fifteen of them.”

“Shoot, literally.” Q didn’t go right to shooting, instead he began by poking and marking spots with a marker, he’d already had each spot memorized, but double checked before marking each spot. He lifted the gun slowly.

“Don’t move.”

“Got it.” Q quickly shot in each sensor before putting the gun down. “Good, job…”

“So what were those?”

“Sensors. You’re brain sends electric signals to the nerves and muscles, telling them how to contract and which muscles should move, it’s all very technical, I’m just trying to explain… Anyway, I studied anatomy and figured out what signals went where, what each signal meant, and how I could capture each signal and translate it into something that could be usable.”

“How long did that take you?”

“Oh, three days, building it was the hard part. I didn’t have all of the right tools…”

“God you’re smart.”

“Thank you.” Q smiled gently, wiping off the small dabs of blood that had beaded out of Jason’s skin. “There… Here, um, I’d put this on, it’s what will hold the leg…and…”

“I’ll be right back, kiddo.” Jason smiled, hopping up, seeing that it not only would wrap around his thigh, but also his waist. He hopped off of the table and hopped around the corner.

“What about your crutch?”

“I can hop a few steps, ex-double-o.” Jason called back, closing a door. Q sighed and sat at the table, waiting. Jason came back two minutes later and hopped up onto the table again. “I’m all yours mad-scientist.” Jason smiled gently.

“Great…” Q grabbed the leg and walked forward. “Okay, ninety degree angle, knee pointing to other knee, then twist to center and pull these two levers. It’s coded to your thumbs and mine—currently—so no one can just snatch your leg off.”

“Convenient.”

“I thought so. Feel alright?”

“So far.”

“Okay...” Q lifted the leg. “Scoot back and lay down.” Jason listened and Q covered his head. “Now, pretend, for me, that you have both legs, alright?”

“Sure thing, kiddo.” Jason nodded.

“Okay…” Q pressed grabbed his phone and plugged it into a spot in Jason’s metallic leg before nodded. “Okay, lift both of your legs, straight up, keeping them straight.” Jason did. “Point your toes parallel to the ground.” He did. “Perpendicular.”

“I’m an agent not a scientist.” Jason teased, but pointed his toes, both metallic and flesh to the ceiling.

“Lift your legs as high as you can. Okay. Bend your knees, feet flat on the table. Straighten them out again… lift and pull your knees to your chest. Legs down. Damn I’m good.” Q pulled the cloth off of Jason’s eyes.

“I take it it’s working?”

“Mostly, come on.” Q helped him slid to the end of the table and Jason automatically bent his knees over the end.

“Holy hell, it moved when I thought about moving it.”

“Muscle memory, the signals are still being sent and the muscles are still moving, it was a simple matter of me translating what your brain and the muscles in your thigh still knows into a language my leg could understand.”

“You really could rule the world if you wanted to.”

“Yes.” Q answered simply. “It would just be boring and tedious. Let’s try to walk. It may take a moment to get used to and I’ll probably have to tweak a few things, but we’ll see.” Q patted his shoulder with his free hand and Jason gently grabbed it, careful not to grab too tightly as he slid to the ground. The pressure on his leg was, different, but not painful, surprisingly. Slowly they started to walk forward. Jason let go of Q’s shoulder and Q tapped on his phone as they walked, making alterations slowly. “Better?”

“Amazing, Q.”

“I have some alterations I still need to make. I have a cover for it so it will look less metallic and I am trying to figure out how to conveniently store a Glock in it and…a few other things, but that may be the next version…but they won’t allow me anywhere around anything weaponized…not that I would need it if I really wanted to kill myself.” Jason winced at the casual reference to Q’s possible suicide, but didn’t comment on it.

“This is perfect, Q…”

“Good.” Q bent down and unplugged the cord. “Walk around all you want, it should be fine.”

“Could I run?”

“Learn to walk before you run, you’re still a bit wobbly.”

“You would be too if you’d just gotten used to not having a damn leg.” Jason said, trying to get used to walking again, managing a few easy circuits before he had his stride back, his normal stride. “God, you’re brilliant kiddo, thank you.” Jason went in for a hug. Q winced back. “Sorry.” Jason lowered his arms.

“Not your fault.”

“I think this is your best work yet.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Thank you.”

“Thank _you.”_ Jason nodded back. “Do you want to watch something or…play video games?” Jason asked, not wanting to run out on the boy who was alone and suffering.

“Don’t you want to…I don’t know, walk through a park or jog around a pond?”

“And skip out so quickly? That would be rude.”

“Um, it’s okay… I think I’ve met my limit for interactions today actually. You’re making me nervous… I don’t know why, it’s just today…”

“Hey. It’s alright. I’ll get out of your hair. Thank you though.”

“You’re welcome. The casing is on the couch…”

“Thank you.” Jason called as he left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	22. Blackout

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The power goes out and Q only has one person to call.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally the boys get out some emotions.

Blackout

 

Q was getting better, until the power went out and plunged everything into darkness. Weight pulled on his ankles and part of his mind frantically told him that it wasn’t real, that it was a hallucination, that it was his PTSD screaming at him, but it felt so _damn_ real. It was cold and everywhere hurt and he could swear that he heard Chinese and footsteps beyond his door. His breathing was quick and his blood pulsed and tears raced down his cheeks.

James. _James._ Where in the hell was James? Why wasn’t he there to protect him?

The part that grasped onto the slightest bit of reality grabbed the phone next to his head and dialed a number.

Five rings, no answer.

“Dammit James, please…” Q winced as lightning flashed and he was sure the door had opened, a torturer was walking through the shadows, tormenting him, coming to get him and no one was there to save him. Q called again.

“ _Q I can’t_ —” There was a small bit more clarity in Q’s head, but not enough to banish the shadows.

“James, the lights are out. James, I can hear them, they’re coming for me. They’re in the shadows. I can’t move… I can’t… Please, please, please. I need you please.”

“ _Q—_ ”

“Please, please, they’ll grab me in the dark, I can’t see, I can’t see! But I can hear them. James, please, I’m scared.”

“ _Sh…sh… Q, I’ll be there soon, stay with me, keep talking to me. No one is coming for you, I’m right here, alright? Listen to me_.”

“There’s someone in the corner of the room. I can hear them. They’re whispering and breathing and—”

“ _I’ll be there soon, I promise, those monsters will never touch you again, I won’t let them, just hold on a moment, I’ll be there_.”

“James it’s so dark, it’s so dark….”

“It’s going to be alright, sh…sh… I’ve got you.”

It took twenty minutes, but James broke in through a window and raced up the stairs, throwing Q’s door open. He was shirtless and completely soaked due to his rushing, but he didn’t care. “Q, it’s me. You’re alright.” James ran forward and gently touched Q’s head.

“James?” The question sounded pathetic and broken.

“Sh, I’m here, I’m here.” Q wrapped his arms around him and buried his head against his wet chest.

“Don’t leave me, I’m scared.”

“Sh…I’m not leaving and the monsters will go away, I promise. They’re going to go away. I’m going to make them go away. Sh…stay with me. Q it’s just a storm, it’ll pass, it’ll pass and the lights will come back on.”

“Don’t leave me.”

“I won’t, I won’t.” James promised, kissing the top of Q’s head gently. “I’m right here. You’re safe. You’re home… It’s all going to be alright.” James promised, pressing himself close and wrapping an arm around Q’s shoulders, his other hand gently combing through his hair. He pressed his lips to Q’s forehead and left his on top of his head. Q buried himself into James’ chest, his grip on James’ arms hurt and James knew he’d have bruises by morning. “Sh, I’ve got you. I’ve got you. They can’t touch you with me here. I promise, I promise. Never again.”

They were curled up for hours before Q started sobbing, shaking in James’ arms and clutching tightly. “You’re alright…” James soothed, rubbing his back gently.

“I know it isn’t real, but I’m still terrified. I feel so damn out of control.” The words were broken by sobs, but James understood. “I can hear it and see it and feel it, but I know it isn’t real. I hate it.”

“I know… You’re going to be alright, Hamish. It will pass. You’ll get through this.”

“Don’t leave me. Please don’t leave me.”

“I’m not going to.” Q wrapped his arms around him tighter and hid his face against James’ chest, James could feel the tears on his skin and closed his eyes, holding the man, swearing he’d never let the man suffer again.

800Q8

Q woke up still pressed against James. James must have noticed he was awake because he started to pull away. “No. You can’t leave me, not like that.”

“I’m not leaving.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.” James whispered. “I just wanted to see if you were alright.” He slowly slid back and looked at Q, seeing a bruise on his forehead. “What happened?”

“Hit my head on the wall trying to get away from them.”

Q didn’t need to elaborate, James knew who Q was trying to run away from. “You’re alright now?”

“They aren’t here anymore.”

“Good.” James smiled gently. James knew PTSD was a fucking nightmare.

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“Calling you, I didn’t have anyone else and…I knew you wouldn’t want to see me but… I had no one else to make me feel safe.”

“Why are you sorry?”

“Well you must think awfully of me, after everything. I supposed that’s why you stayed away, you didn’t…want to be around something so broken.”

“Hamish that is as far from the truth as you could ever go.” James whispered, pressing a gentle kiss to the bruise on Q’s head and pulled Q back into his chest. He wanted Q to be comforted and he didn’t want him to see as he spoke. “It isn’t you, Hamish, it’s me. I watched you suffer, I heard you suffer, I caused you pain… I hate myself more than you can imagine. There is nothing wrong with you. Hamish, you are perfect.”

“But I’m broken and tainted and…”

“No, you’re not. You are perfect and I’m a fucking monster.” They stayed silent for a moment, Q didn’t mention anything about the tears he felt falling from James’ eyes.

“James?”

“What?”

“My job is to use my mind to create things to kill people with, to help people kill and torture for information. I have killed before, I have watched people be tortured. I have allowed terrible things to happen for the betterment of one Island in a world full of people who all have a right to live. My job is not a good one. You can’t think yourself as a monster, not when in the company of a monster.”

“Your job and who you are are two totally different things, Hamish. You are smart and witty and kind and honest and caring…”

“Then you have to admit that you and your job are two different things. Hamish and Q are different, even if not many knows about ‘Hamish’, James and 007 are different too.”

“But James and Hamish were in that place and James hurt you.”

“No. You see, James is protective and caring and cunning and wounded and all the kinder for his wounds. James didn’t hurt me, he saved me. It would have been so much worse if it were anyone else and it would have been more than one. James, can I tell you the truth? And please…please don’t leave or get angry.”

“I won’t.”

“If it would have been any other time. If you would have asked or offered. I would have given it to you…I would give anything to you. Yes, it was horrible the way things happened, but I’m so glad it was you. I don’t have nightmares about that. I don’t worry about it, I don’t hurt over it…because I trust you and I’ve loved you for a while. I know you wouldn’t hurt me and I’m sorry I asked for you to do something I knew would hurt you…I just…it couldn’t be them, not when I had someone I trusted no matter what with me.”

“You…love me?”

“I have for a while…since you let me borrow your coat at Christmas, even. I know it doesn’t fix anything, but I want you to know I don’t see you as a monster. I never have. I have always thought of you as a protector. Why else would I call you? I was terrified and all I knew is that I would be safe if you were with me. I would be protected with you. I don’t care, well, I do, how you feel about me but I just need you to know that you’re not a monster. You are very far from a monster, James Bond.” James was shaking with tears, but he didn’t try to stop them and Q didn’t ask him to. They were both broken and crying, but at least they weren’t alone.

“Hamish?”

“Yes?”

“You’re not broken.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	23. Return the Overlord

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q's back at being Q.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it was late and that it's short...but life.  
> I don't own anything.

Return the Overlord

 

A month later Q walked into Q-Branch and stood at the large station, smiling and taking a deep breath before continuing his work. “Sir?” R asked walking forward with a smile.

“Yes R?” Q smiled at her.

“I saw psych gave you a pass. Glad to have you back. We’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed everything in here too. So who do we have in the field?”

“009, Ronson, is in Korea, what with the elections and all. 001 is in Georgia, the US. 006 is in—”

“Nigeria, I’ve heard.”

“Um, how?”

“Bond told me.”

“Oh, you two are talking? Or are you… _talking_?”

“He’s a good friend, R. We’re helping each other through it. We’re getting better.”

“But you told him.”

“Yes…”

“And?”

“He didn’t say anything and he doesn’t have to. He’s hurt. I’m hurt. I’m not in a place for that sort of thing right now. He knows and he can say no or yes whenever he’s ready. I can’t tell him when to be ready and I know I’m not. So…it’s fine. Everything’s alright, for now. Korean elections? We’re working with an outside source aren’t we?”

“Yes, someone named Mr. Holmes, Mycroft.”

“Figures. I’ll talk to him.”

“He’ll only work with M.”

“R, I’m Q, nice to meet you. If I say someone will work with me, they will.”

“God I’ve missed you and your smartass ways.” R chuckled and walked off. Q sighed and walked into his office, leaving the door slightly open before he sat at his desk, calling a familiar number.

“ _This is Andria_.”

“No, your name is Lisa. What is your obsession with A’s?”

“ _Hamish, shall I transfer you to your uncle_?”

“Tell him Q is calling.”

“ _Of course, ‘Mish_.”

“And have a lovely day, Andria.”

“ _Thank you, Hamish, that’s why you’re the favorite_.”

“How are the kids?”

“ _Lovely, Alice turned ten two weeks ago_.”

“I missed it, I’m sorry.”

“ _You’ve had a lot on your mind, Mish. I’ll tell her you sent well wishes.”_

“Thank you. I’ll have to send flowers too, she’ll never forgive me for missing a birthday.”

_“You’re practically her uncle, she loves you.”_

“Well, I feel bad, didn’t even notice the date.”

 _“Don’t. Shall I transfer you_?”

“Yes, please.”

“ _Have a good day, Q. And welcome back. England tried to fall when you were away. The rest of the Holmes’ had to pick up the slack_.” Q giggled.

“They would be lost without me. Thank you, Andria.”

“ _You’re welcome_.” There was silent for a minute before a voice picked up.

“ _Q_?”

“Rigging elections again, are we?”

“ _Is there any other way_?”

“You know you really fucked up several years back.”

“ _That was not my fault_.” Mycroft snapped.

“How do I love pushing buttons… I have an agent in, I suspect this assassination is something you concocted?”

“ _It is the most obvious route. Child’s play_.”

“Yes, take down a terrorist and the funding slows to a rather terrible person. I agree. I’ll handle that agent personally.”

“ _See to it that this isn’t cocked up.”_

“Yes, sir.”

“ _And Q_?”

“Yes?”

“ _Glad to have a Q again_.”

“Yes sir—oh and grandmum called. Said something about Hamlet.”

 _“Dear god_ …”

“Pin it on brother dear, he’s free that night.”

“ _Thank you, Q.”_

“Of course.” Q smiled and hung up. He took a deep breath and smiled before slipping in his earpiece. “009, Agent Ronson, can you hear me?”

“ _Who is this?”_

“This is Q, I’m going to be with you on the rest of your mission.”

_“Q…It’s good to hear you’re back, sir.”_

“It’s good to be back.”

800Q8

Q smiled and put his laptop in his bag, pulling it over his shoulder. He looked around Q-branch and slowly turned for the door. M and Tanner were standing in the doorway. Tanner smiled warmly at Q and nodded. Q nodded back to him and Tanner slowly left the branch, a silent understanding met between them. “Q.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“I’m glad you’re back and well.”

“I’m better, not well, but better. Thank you.”

“Keep up the good work.”

“I always will.”

“Good. Welcome back.”

“Thank you, ma’am.”

“And don’t hit me again.”

“It was…unprofessional and frankly I wasn’t in my own head…just don’t drive me that far out of my mind again. I’ll be back tomorrow.”

“Good.” M said, not adding anything else as Q walked by her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	24. Tagged

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James gives Q a gift.  
> Things are said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I'm being slow and it may be that way for a while, I have some personal things I need to get through right now, so this may end up on the back burner for a bit, but I won't leave you.

Tagged

 

“Hello, Q.”

“Hello, Bond, how did the sun treat you?” Q asked, holding out his hand expectantly. James placed his gun and tracker in it and Q looked them over quickly.

“It was warm. You should get some sun like that someday. May help with the spots and the ghostly complexion.”

“Perhaps you should get less sun, may save you from turning into leather later.” Q quipped back instantly. James chuckled.

“Touché.”

“I know.” Q smiled slightly. “You actually took care of your equipment. I’m pleasantly surprised.”

“Good. How have you been?”

“I’m alright. It’s a bit quiet at the house, but I’m doing alright.”

“The quiet bugs you?”

“I had 002 sleeping on my sofa for a time though, so that made it better. 002 left the telly on as they slept, so it was nice.”

“That’s good, why’d he show up?”

“Rough day in Mexico, he’s better now. Needed a safe place to sleep, I suspect.”

“Do you need someone to stay over?” The subtext was clear. _Do you need me to sleep on the sofa with the TV on?_

 _“_ That would be nice, takeaway and Top Gear?”

“Indian?”

“Sounds lovely.”

“Don’t take the tube, I’ll take you home.”

“I’m calling it quits at seven.”

“I’ll be here.”

“Get a shower before you come back,” Q mentioned, his nose wrinkling slightly.

“I agree, want to get the blood off.”

“And don’t think I didn’t notice the fractured rib, visit Medical.”

“You shouldn’t notice those things.”

“It’s in my blood. I notice everything. Shoo, I have work to do.”

“Sure thing, bof.” James smiled and left the room.

800Q8

James and Q sat on the sofa, comfortably silent, eating from containers and sitting in their pjs as three men raced cars across several countries. It was good. They felt safe around each other, safe with each other around. They didn’t talk about Q’s secret love, they didn’t bring it up and they both knew it wasn’t the time. They would talk about it when they were ready. At the moment, friendship was what they needed, they needed a safety net, a place to go when they were scared or hurt, because even scary agents with high kill counts got hurt and scared, even if they didn’t often show it outwardly.

“Q?”

“Hm?”

“Can I give you something?”

“What?” There was a clink as James placed something warm and metallic in Q’s hand. Q knew what they were without looking. His papa had dog tags, his dad carried them around, but they were his papa’s. He’d held them a few times and knew the weight and texture of them. “Why are you giving these to me?”

“Because I’m attached to them.”

“I’m not following. I’m a genius, not a mind reader.”

“I’ve been known to go back for them. It’s just…I can tell you get lonely and scared, so it’s so you know you aren’t alone. Besides, they make noises, might help you to sleep when you’re home alone.”

“Thank you. I’ll take care of them.”

“I know you will.”

“If you ever want them back—”

“I’ll come and get them.” James said with a smile. Q smiled before he sighed.

“I’ve made up the guest bedroom.”

“Not the sofa?”

“You fractured a rib. The bed will be better.”

“Thank you.”

“I have to be up at four, I need to get some sleep. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Q.” James watched as Q walked up the stairs, noticing as he slipped the chain over his head and hearing the clink of metal as he hid the tags under his shirt.

800Q8

“So, you’re together.”

“No, we aren’t.” Q answered, sipping his tea slowly.

“Mish, he gave you his tags, I’m not Sherlock, but I can see a chain under your shirt. He likes you.”

“He wants me to feel safe.”

“I didn’t give your father my tags until after we’d dated for a month.”

“You didn’t get tortured together.”

“Got shot at together.”

“Not quite the same, papa.” John sighed and shook his head, leaning back in his chair.

“At the very least he likes you.”

“We’re not talking about it. I laid out my side and when he’s ready to have that discussion, we will. I wasn’t the only person hurt, you know. He was hurt too, just a different type of pain.” Hamish looked down at his cup.

“I know, but for men like James and I, trust is about as close to love as you can come without saying it.”

“All of the double-os sleep at my house, I have a lot of people after my ass.”

“Hamish,” John’s tone was only mildly scolding before he chuckled. “It’s different with James, trust me. They trust you, but he’s different and you know it.”

“Papa, I’m not getting my hopes up and quite honestly, I’m not ready to have a whirlwind relationship…you and dad had that and I am just not ready for something like that. I need slow and steady and stable. I’m not going to push him and he won’t push me and if it takes years to talk then I have to accept it, because he deserves time.”

“Trust me, it won’t take years. Just…be happy, alright?”

“I’m working on it.”

“Good.”

800Q8

It was months later before they sat and spoke. James started it, quite tentatively for a man with an extensive background with taking care of incredibly hostile situations. “Can we talk?”

“What do you want? Did you break something? And no, I will not make an exploding pen.” Q’s voice had a teasing tone to it, until he looked at James. “Yeah, what about?”

“Something you told me.”

“Oh… _oh_. Yes. What about it?”

“Is it true?”

“I’m assuming we’re thinking of the same thing, but yes, nothing’s changed.”

“Why? I’m not a good person.”

“Yes you are, a bit of a dick at times, but a good person.”

“Q, please be serious.”

“I am being serious. You’re a good person, even if you can’t see it. This isn’t just about your self-confidence issues though, is it? What’s really bothering you?” Q knew already, of course he did and he knew James knew that he knew, but he wasn’t going to pry and James knew that too.

“I care about you a lot. I can’t tell you it’s love, because, quite honestly, I don’t know what love is. It’s been a very long time since I’ve felt anything like love. I’m not quite sure I know what it feels like. I do care for you though, but I don’t think I can… I don’t know what can happen here and I don’t want you to think that I don’t care, I do…it’s just.”

“Complicated.”

“Understatement.”

“Well, we’re on the same page. Let’s face it, we’re better, but we’re still fucked up, it’ll take time and I’m glad you told me, we have a direction to go in and it isn’t a race. We’ll get there when we get there.”

“You’re calm about this.”

“My dad loved my papa for several years before my papa would even admit to himself that my dad was the one exception to his heterosexuality. I know life just doesn’t fall into place in a day and that’s alright. We start small. I mean microscopic if we have too.”

“I don’t think that small…unless…?”

“I think I’ll be alright, just, small steps. And honesty.”

“Honesty.” James agreed with a small smile. “Honesty would be refreshing.”

“Especially in a world of lies…” Q agreed.

“Easier than I expected.”

“I’m not too difficult, unless I’m working. Someone had to be the sane one in my family. Someone had to be reasonable.”

James held out his hand and Q took it, threading their fingers together. “This is okay?”

“It’s perfect.”

“Okay, good.”

800Q8

Everyone knew there was something going on between James and Q over the next month, especially Q-branch, who had noticed their overlord fiddling with dog tags whenever he was under stress. They also noticed when James came in, bringing food and little treats for Q, only to stay in Q’s office for an hour or two, just talking. Not to mention James seemed to be driving Q home often.

Q-Branch didn’t gossip about it (at least in front of Q) and Q was glad for it.

“Q?”

“What? Oh, hello, James.” Q smiled. “How long have you been there?”

“Five minutes. What are you working on?”

“Oh, um, blueprints.”

“You realize it’s, eleven, right?”

“So it is. Why are you here?” Q asked, confused.

“I just got back from Madrid.”

“Oh, right.”

“You’re too tired to be working. You should go home, get some rest. Staring at it won’t help you get any further at this point.”

“I suppose you’re right.”

“Need a ride?”

“Yeah, need a place to crash?”

“It would be nice, I got shot at.”

“Spare room’s always open. Just…let me shut this down.”

“Alright.” James smiled, waiting for the screen to go black before helping Q into his coat. The two walked hand-in-hand through Q-branch.

“Goodnight, Overlord.”

“Goodnight, Minions.” Q smiled at the night-shifters before leaving with James.

“They are fucking adorable.” A minion gushed.

“Aren’t they just?”

800Q8

James walked with Q through the carpark and noticed as Q buried his other hand in his coat, trying to get away from the chill in the air. James gently slipped both of their hands into his coat pocket and Q smiled up at him sleepily, walking a bit closer as they continued on. Q’s hands were precious to him and they were precious to James.

James drove them to Q’s home and Q dozed lightly in the passenger seat, leaning against the window with a light snore leaving him on occasion. “Q?”

“Mm, five more minutes.”

“Hamish, you’re home. Come on, got to get inside and then I promise you can have a few more hours.”

“I’m sold.”

“You have to get up if you plan on moving.” James chuckled, getting out and walking to the other side of the car, opening the door for an only semi-coherent Q. By the time they reached the door, Q was alert again and James felt bad for waking the man up, hoping that he’d be able to fall asleep quickly. Q put in the code and walked them into his house, dropping his bag on the sofa. “Aren’t you going to lock up?”

“Security: Program Alpha.” A beat of silence then a light beep responded, followed by the sound of locks clicking shut. “Yes, I am.”

“That’s handy.”

“I got bored while under house arrest.”

“I can imagine.” James sighed, following Q up the stairs. The door to the guest room was open and James was going to head to it but Q stopped him.

“Thank you. I was exhausted. And apparently useless. Didn’t even realize I was staring at the same thing for that long.”

“Any time.” James smiled. “You work too hard.”

“Hardly.” Q shook his head. “Can I kiss you goodnight?”

“Yes.”

Technically it wasn’t Q’s first kiss, but he’d count it anyways. It was chaste and sweet, comprised of just a few gentle brushes of lips. “Goodnight, James.”

“Goodnight, Hamish.” James smiled and walked to the guest room. Q smiled and gently closed his door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	25. The Belstaff

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mycroft, Sherlock, and John pull a Mycroft. Greg thinks their insane and Q is pissed off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, everyone. I know I'm posting early, but I got this done a day ahead of schedule so I thought you wouldn't mind.  
> 

The Belstaff

 

_Happy Birthday, H. –SH_

“What?” Q asked looking at the text. He looked out of the front door and picked up the package on the step, his father’s handwriting was on it. Q sighed and walked inside, opening the package and pulling free a lovely, black, Belstaff. “Dad, it’s not my birthday.” Q shook his head and sighed. “He must have deleted it, again. Well, I’m not going to say no to a new coat.” Q shrugged, before checking every pocket for bugs. “Alright, legitimate gift…I hope.”

800Q8

James had commented that he liked the coat on Q, so Q made a point to wear it more often, which was really the whole point. Q and James just didn’t know it.

Mycroft sent the text that called Q into MI6 early.

_Cock-up with the new tooth implants, report asap. –M_

And then he sent the text that got James running twenty minutes later, after Q had gotten on the Tube.

_Walking to MI6, they needed me in early, see you this afternoon. –Q_

Mycroft sat and waited with John and Lestrade in a carpark. “Really, this is how you manage things?”

“Only with double-o agents. Had to catch him off guard and Q does that nicely.”

“Really, you three, couldn’t you just invite the man for a beer?” Greg asked.

“Yes, and we’ll just get him some tea and an invitation to Christmas as well.”  Mycroft said sarcastically.

“Oi, none of that, Myc. Jesus, why couldn’t I join an ordinary family?”

“What would be the fun of ordinary?”

“Sanity. You planned to have the man killed.”

“He could be taking advantage of Hamish.” Mycroft snapped.

“I saw the tape.” John added.

“They were holding hands! Dear God! You said yourself it would be good for him to have someone, John.”

“Not this quickly!”

“Am I the only person here who has a shred of sanity?”

“You married a Holmes.” John commented.

“Fucking hell…” Greg rubbed his head as a black car pulled up. A door opened and a man walked forward, Sherlock coming from the other side of the car.  

“Hello, Mr. Bond.” Mycroft said simply.

“Where’s Q?” James asked.

“MI6, called him in a bit early, we wanted to talk to you.”

“I gathered. Shouldn’t make me worry about him.” James commented looking down the line of them.

“I don’t think it’s your business to worry about him.” Sherlock commented, lowering his collar. “Do you?”

“Sherlock.” Greg rolled his eyes.

“You know who I am, I’ve got cameras everywhere. Care to explain why you have been going to Q’s house?” Mycroft asked.

“And staying the night? That’s what I wonder about.” John added.

“What exactly do you intend with my son?”

“For God’s sake…” Greg pinched the bridge of his nose.

“We are not very excited to you spending so much time with him when it can cause pain.” Mycroft added. “What is your purpose?”

“I’m just…”

“You don’t have to answer, James.” Q said, his footsteps echoing as he walked into the scene, looking quite pissed off.

“Hamish, I told them not to.” Greg started.

“I suspect you did.” Q smiled at him before stepping inbetween his family and James. “You lot have a problem? This isn’t how you solve it. You ask me or you talk to him. You don’t send fake texts or lie or kidnap or do anything as stupid as this. Normal people invite others to Christmas dinner or birthday dinners. Mrs. Hudson’s birthday is coming up, you realize? You could have done this the right way.”

“Hamish”

“No, I’m too pissed off to be Hamish right now, I suspect you’ve never met Q, Papa. Shut it, I am talking.” John raised his eyebrows but didn’t speak. “Mycroft, I suspect nothing you touch will work for a very long time. This is none of your business. Dad, you know damn well what’s happening so you didn’t even have to fucking have this little incident. Papa, I thought you were alright with me having someone, you _encouraged_ it—must I remind you? Greg, bless you for being the only sane person I know.”

“Ta for that.”

“We don’t like the thought of you in a relationship with a double-o.” Mycroft started. “We’re concerned about you.”

“Concerned?”

“After you’re…ordeal.” Sherlock added.

“Concerned about what? That I’m happy? That I’m healing? I am getting better. I am really smiling and laughing and happy. I have someone I can trust. Someone who I know will protect me. Someone who understand and cares for me. Why are you so concerned? I’m happy. I’m getting better. We are getting better.”

“Double-os are dangerous.”

“Because they kill? I’ve killed. For Mrs. Hudson. For you. For Queen and Country. Every day I send people out to kill. Both of my parents have killed and both of my uncles have. Stop digging into my life. Of all the people in the Holmes boys, I should be the last one you want to piss off. I can control all of your lives in my pajamas before my first cup of tea. I could destroy you or ruin you with no effort. I suspected you’d pull him aside, try to scare him and I knew it would make me mad, but you fucking crossed a line when you decided to mess with not only me, not only him, but my job too. The teeth? I’ve been working for months on better suicide molars than the outdated fucking ones the old Q had in my agents and you say there’s a problem with them, Mycroft? You shouldn’t have done that. No, you crossed a line fucking with my feelings for my agents.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t have feelings.” Sherlock snipped.

“You jumped off of a fucking building for me, Papa, Greg, and Mrs. Hudson, don’t you dare get high and mighty about ‘feelings’ ass.”

“I’m your father.”

“And you’re being an ass.” Everyone went silent. “Next time, none of this. Christmas or anything would be better. If you do this again and if _you_ worry me unnecessarily again…you will not like the person I become. Understand?” They all stared at him, obviously having never met Q the Quartermaster. “Understand?”

“Yes, Q.”

“Yes, Hamish.”

“Yes…”

“Good, and because I know you’re all idiots. Yes, we’re together, yes he spends the night in my house, yes he sleeps in the guest bedroom, yes we hold hands, yes we kiss, yes we’re both taking it slow, and no none of this is your business.” Q turned and grabbed James’ hand, pulling him away only to stop. “Don’t try to follow me. You’re cameras, your car, none of it will work. And quite frankly I may end up shooting you. Lovely to see you, Uncle Greg.”

“You too, Hamish.”

“Come on, James. I took the day off.”

“You a day off?”

“I need it now…” Q sighed as they walked down the ramp.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	26. Growing Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q tells James about his past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short and late, but it's what I can manage at the time. Sorry, really busy at the moment.

Growing Up

 

They ended up seated on a park bench after a short walk. “I’m sorry about them. They piss me off sometimes, but…they mean well and love me a lot.”

“I noticed.” James commented.

“Perhaps I should explain a bit, so you understand the insanity and so you’re better prepared. Are you alright with that? Seems how you’ve already been forced to meet the parents.”

“It’s fine.”

“For clarity’s sake. I call Sherlock, the tall, dark, dramatic detective that has my hair Dad and the one who gave me his height is Papa, so you know…so you can tell them apart.”

“Alright, go ahead.”

“I’ve done some bad things.”

“We all have.”

“Okay… Well, it started with Uncle Greg and Dad. You’d like Greg, he’s sane and kind. He’s as DI for NSY. He found my dad high and in an abandoned building, he was younger than me at the time. Dad told him that his girlfriend was cheating on him and that the thief he was looking for owned a black cat. Even high, my dad’s a genius. Greg didn’t arrest him. He took a sort of pity on the broken genius and went through his things. He found Uncle Mycroft’s number and called him to collect Dad. That’s how those two met, hit it off as well as anyone could with a Holmes. Dad got clean because Mycroft forced him and Greg took it upon himself to keep the genius occupied. Used to bring him cold cases to work out. Dad loved it.”

“Consulting Detective.”

“Exactly… My dad doesn’t do well with people, but they had a sort of friendship and Mycroft and Greg got together three years later. Then two years after that Papa got shot overseas, Afghanistan, shot in the shoulder. Came home with a limp and a shaky hand, met Dad and two days later had fixed his limp his tremor and had killed a serial killer for my Dad. They were sort of meant to be. Took two years for them to finally do it, but they did, even though my papa isn’t gay. They were married, but kept it from the outside world. They didn’t need the world to know and the world still doesn’t know. Anyway, Dad had forgotten he was a carrier.”

“How do you forget something like that?”

“Holmes’ minds are more like computers. We can learn and memorize things, but we can also delete them. He deleted that fact. He was on a case, puked his guts out at the smell of a corpse. Papa took him home tried to help him get better, but he was sick even after a week. Papa insisted he go to a hospital, just in case. And there I was. Dad wanted to get rid of me at first. He didn’t think he’d be a fit parent, but Papa’s happiness caught on. Dad began to hope that maybe I could be normal, could grow up happy…so they kept me.”

“And a good thing too.” James smiled, squeezing his hand.

“Dad can’t have kids anymore because of me. It’s tricky enough carrying to term for a carrier and I was a bit difficult.”

“You? Never.”

“Anyway, I was born into a house with an Army Doctor and a Consulting Detective. My uncles are police and the government. I have very protective family…but trouble makers the lot of them. They would go off and have these adventures, taking me with them. Papa taught me how to shoot when I was five. Dad had me deducing people at three. I was hacking at the age of six.”

“Started young.”

“We Holmes’ tend to. I took apart every electronic in the house and put them back together again by the time I was ten. I killed for the first time when I was ten…”

“Really?” Q nodded.

“It started earlier than MI6 for me. There was a man named Moriarty, a Consulting Criminal.”

“I remember that trial.”

“You would, it wasn’t long ago… He was obsessed with Dad, creating puzzles for him to fix, watching him dance. He kidnapped me and Papa and strapped us to bombs when I was eight. He had this Irish accent and switched tones from manic to just…frightening. We didn’t die, Dad came for us, but it wasn’t fun. Two years later he stole the crown jewels—the trial you remember... Anyway, he decided he was going to destroy my dad, ruined his reputation. I remember, after he was acquitted he came to the house. They were talking about riddles, Moriarty and Dad when I walked in. He said he owed my dad a fall. I wanted to kill him. Dad kept me behind him but Moriarty sort of smirked at me. He called me an adorable, clever boy. Said if I grew up smart he’d like to play with me too. Then he left.

“Dad told me to stay out of it. Shortly after the came to arrest my Dad for abduction of two children. I pleaded with them, my dad didn’t do it. Greg was sorry, but his hands were tied. Papa punched the chief got himself arrested too. I was left with Mrs. Hudson—our landlady and sort of our housekeeper, sort of a grandmother for me too. There was an assassin in the flat. He was posing as a handyman. I saw his gun and deduced him. He was so close to Mrs. Hudson. I was scared, only knew one thing to do. Kill him before he killed us.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Took two shots, I was so scared. I called Mycroft, but couldn’t speak. He was doing something with Dad, I didn’t know it, but he came for me anyway. He cleaned up my mess and told me I hadn’t made a mistake, that he was an assassin, had a whole file on him to prove it. Papa came home that night…dad had jumped off of the roof of St. Bart’s in front of him. My dad was dead. I was ten, had just killed a man, had been threatened by the most dangerous criminal ever, the criminal had killed himself, and my dad was dead.”

“I’m sorry.”

“We went to his funeral. Papa begged him to be alive…then we moved away from home and tried to start a new life. Two years, it was two years before dad came back. He’d spent two years destroying everything Moriarty had left. Papa was furious and I was too. Mycroft had known, grandmummy and grandpa had known but they didn’t tell us. I wasn’t as angry as papa though. Papa punched him and I just wanted to see him. Papa wouldn’t let me, so I stole a car. I got caught and arrested. Mycroft came to the rescue, got me out, didn’t tell anyone and took me back to Baker Street, to my Dad. It took a bomb that I told Dad how to disarm through an earpiece to put their relationship back in order, ish. They’ve gotten back to themselves by now… I helped them with a lot of cases, killed a few more people…none of them very good men, but still killing. Then MI6 caught me. We’re a protective and fucked up family, but you learn to love them and want to strangle them at the same time.”

“They sound protective.”

“They are. You’ll likely be invited to Christmas, which will likely be hellish.”

“It’s alright. I haven’t had a proper Christmas will all of the fighting in years.” James chuckled.

“My advice is hide with Greg and me, and never play any games with anyone.”

“Alright…”

“And don’t take anything they say too harshly. They’re protective and if they do anything like that again they’ll be ripped to shreds and never have any electronics work for them again, ever.”

“Don’t go too harshly on them. They just want you safe. We all do.”

“But you don’t send me into panic attacks and kidnap my boyfriend—you are my…um, right? Sorry, just sort of assumed.”

“Assume away.” James smiled and kissed his cheek. “Gelato sound alright to you? I know a place not far from here.”

“Sounds lovely. Can we come back out and lay in the grass? I don’t get out in the sun enough and it’s beautiful out.”

“Of course we can. Won’t you burn though?”

“Probably a little, but I’m used to it when I do go out. I just miss sunshine.”

“Alright, come on, my treat.”

“Like a date then?”

“Mm-hm.”

“Angelo would put a candle on the table.” Q said as James pulled him up.

“Who?”

“Angelo, kind of extended family, works at a lovely little Italian place, assumed my dad and papa were going out the first night they’d met, put a candle on the table and everything.”

“He sounds amusing.”

“He is, and he always gives me free food, plus extra deserts. I’ll take you there someday.”

“Alright. What’s your favorite?”

“Mango.”

“As you wish.”

“I will stab you if you start quoting that movie at me.” Q glared at James before both of them broke out into laughter.

“Come on, you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	27. It Was a Good Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James drops off the radar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of Princess Bride quotes and some tension at the end.

It Was a Good Day

 

 _“Q_?”

“Yes, 007?” Q wondered as he worked.

 _“I’m bored_.”

“Okay.”

“ _Aren’t you going to entertain me?”_

“You are not royal and I am not your fool.” Q sighed back.

“ _You’re still working, it’s nearly midnight in London_.”

“I know, I’m in London.”

“ _Too quiet at home_?”

“Two quiet.” Q agreed.

“ _So you have time to entertain me_.”

“I’m working.”

“ _You left comms open for me, you mustn’t be working hard_.”

“You’re right, just trying to be productive while I remain awake.”

_“You could always read. You never have time for it and you love it.”_

“I do.” Q sighed, leaning back in his chair. “What should I read?”

 _“Something interesting so that I’m not bored_.”

“You expect me to read aloud.”

 _“Yes, I do. I’m bored and have six more hours of absolutely nothing before I can actually do something. At least keep me company while you’re up_.”

“Okay.” He pulled up the first book he thought of, one he’d started but never managed to finish. “ _Lyra and her daemon moved—_ ”

“ _Is this a kissing book_?”

“Damn it James, I’m going to stab you.” Q hissed. James laughed lightly on the other end, absolutely gleeful.

“ _I couldn’t resist, sweetie. Continue.”_

“Ass.” Q sighed before he continued onwards. He managed several chapters before James spoke.

“ _You’re drifting. Get some sleep_.”

“I’m fine.”

“ _You’ve read the same line four times,_ _Q_.” James sighed gently.

“Damn, I have, haven’t I?”

“ _Yes, we can read more later, you need sleep_.”

“It’s too quiet at home.”

“ _There’s a sofa in your office. I can stay on comms if that would help_.”

“That would be lovely.” Q sighed, getting up and sprawling across the sofa. Q held on to the tags around his neck. James didn’t say anything, but there were sounds. Sounds of him moving and breathing. Sound of life that were normal and common and safe.

James only signed off after he heard the very lightest of snores.

800Q8

“Q?” R asked, setting a cup of tea on his desk. “Sorry to wake you up from your nap, but 007 likes you best and he’s about to head in.”

“Alright.” Q sat up and stretched, straightening his glasses and tucking the tags back under his shirt.

“You are adorable. So unfortunate that you’re taken.”

“I thought you and 006 had hit it off.”

“Doesn’t mean that you aren’t adorable.” R winked. “Besides, you’re like a little brother to me. Unfortunately, your pet assassin would still likely kill me for saying it. Then again, I’m just saying what everyone thinks. You’re adorable.”

“Great…that’s the last thing I need.” Q got up and put in his earpiece.

“You may want to brush your hair too, before you go out there…or the minions may be tempted to pet you.” R chuckled before walking out. Q rolled his eyes before connecting.

“This is Q.”

“ _Finally, my good luck charm_.”

“You don’t need good luck.”

 _“I do if I’m going to be stormin’ the castle._ ”

“Seriously, stabbed.”

“ _No, you like me too much_.”

“I never said it would kill you. I know a lot of places I can stab and you’ll be just fine.”

“ _I’m calling your bluff, kitten_.”

“Why am I a kitten?”

“ _Would you rather be Princess Buttercup?”_

“Bastard.” Q chuckled.

“ _But I made you laugh_.”

“I suppose so, I’m also sharpening a knife.”

“ _You’re bluffing_.”

“Shut up.”

“ _I knew you were bluffing_.”

“You have a mission to be doing.”

“ _I am doing my mission, or have you been not watching your screen_?”

“I’ve been watching, just not seeing a lot of action.”

“ _If you wanted action you could have just asked, sweetheart. I’m happy to oblige.”_

“I’ll believe it when I see it.” Q smirked.

“ _Be seeing quite a lot then_.” Q chuckled and shook his head. “ _Alright, now which way do I go_?”

“Left.”

800Q8

It ended with bullets and running and shouting. “ _Q?_ ”

“Are you alright, 007? You have to keep moving.”

“ _I need you to listen to me for a moment. My tags, do you remember what I told you about them_?”

“What? Yes, of course I do.”

“ _Good. Remember that_.” Fifteen seconds later, James vanished. Nothing on comms, nothing on satellite, nothing on his tracker. He could have been dead. There was panic in Q-branch as they tried to find him, to bring him back. The last things they’d heard were gunshots.

Q took a deep breath and wrapped his fingers around the tags around his throat. He could only hope James knew what he was doing. “Agent down.”

800Q8

Q sat in his armchair, staring at the front door, exhausted. His phone vibrated and he looked down at it.

_Not dead only mostly dead, Buttercup. Need time, I’ll be back soon. In the meantime sleep well._

“How do you know I’m not sleeping?” Q asked.

_Come home safe._

Q sighed before he turned on his side, pulling his feet up into his chair and going to sleep, dog tags in hand.

800Q8

Q woke to a blanket being wrapped around his shoulders. He tensed instantly. “Sh, it’s just me.”

“James? What happened to needing time?”

“I took the time on the plane. Couldn’t think of you being alone not sleeping. Apparently you sleep just fine without me around.”

“Only when I know you’re safe.” Q put his glasses on and turned to look at James. “Are you alright?”

“Got shot, but I’m alright.”

“It was a good day until you decided to leave like that.”

“I need to do that sometimes, sorry. Coping technique I never kicked.”

“But you came back…for me?”

“What else?” Q smiled a watery smile at him before taking a deep breath.

“I suspect the stitches are awful and made up of floss.”

“You think so little of me. I waited for you to stitch it up, didn’t want it to scar.”

“You absolute bastard, you could bleed out.”

“It’s not that bad.” James rolled his eyes, but smiled as Q grabbed him and dragged him off to the bathroom.

“Show me.” Q said, reaching for a first aid kit.

“If you wanted me undressed you just had to ask.” James said, stripping off his jacket.

“Do you flirt all the time? Even with bullet wounds?”

“It’s fun.”

“You’re ridiculous.”

“You flirted back over comms.”

“Yes, while it was calm, you bastard.”

“You still flirted back.” James chuckled.

“Of course I did.” Q sighed, looking after James’ shoulder as soon as it was in view. Q closed the lid to the toilet and pushed the shirtless double-o down onto it. “Sit still.” He warned, beginning to clean the wound, a graze really, as he stood between James’ legs.

“I’m sorry.”

“About what?”

“Worrying you.”

“You warned me, and you texted me… It’s more than what my parents did. Besides, if someone isn’t bleeding I don’t feel like my day is normal.” Q smiled slightly, reaching for a needle. James caught his hand and gently pressed a kiss to his knuckles.

“I don’t deserve you.”

“No, you don’t.” Q smiled. “You could do so much better.”

“No I couldn’t.” James chuckled as he released Q’s hand.

“Now, stay still. I’m trying for minimal scarring.” Q said before finishing up the stitches and bandaging the wound.

“I’m sorry for waking you up.” James stood up as Q washed his hands. It was early and James knew Q likely hadn’t slept well.

“I would have been pissed off if you bled on things.”

“But you have work.”

“Tanner insisted I take the day off, grieving and all that.”

“You knew I was coming back, didn’t you?” James asked worriedly, following Q out of the room.

“I was waiting on the chair, but then again you’re not a genius, I shouldn’t assume you’d guess such things.”

“I’ll always come back.”

“I trust you.” Q smiled at him and James smiled back before pulling him into a kiss. A kiss that quickly changed into a heated make-out session against the wall in the hall. They broke apart, foreheads resting against each others. “Thank you for coming home, and in one piece, mostly.”

“Thank you for being here.”

“Always.”

“Do you mind, if…I stayed in your room tonight?”

“No, come on.”

There was a tension they were both resolute to not bring up as they crawled into bed. They both knew it was there, both knew that they were both feeling it…neither said a word. It wasn’t the right time. Q curled up against James’ bare chest and James wrapped his unwounded arm around him. The fell asleep warm, safe, and silently wanting, silently afraid and eager but content at the same time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	28. Strawberries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bomb disarming, strawberries, and flashbacks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I'm posting a bit early, but I won't be able to post on my normal day. I have to say thank you (again and a million times over) to xphil98197 for collaborating with me on this. You will all be thankful too, trust me. (Seriously, I was getting to the point where there was no more writing I could think to do to get from A to Z, xphil98197 is seriously a life saver.) That being said! There will be some new things in this that you don't normally get from me. But for now, be warned that there is a PTSD related incident within this chapter.

Strawberries

 

A month passed with tension easing into their lives. They had discussed the tension and had decided that they would continue on a slow path, but they’d both come to the conclusion that things were coming to a head. They needed to approach it with caution, they knew it, but they knew hindering it wasn’t going to be good. They both agreed that if it was possible to move forward and heal, then that was the good direction to go in.

It was ironically what Q was thinking about while he lay under a bomb, working on disarming it. It wasn’t actually in the palace, but it was close, and the blast range was actually enough for most of London. Q’s house would have been blown to hell, along with his parent’s house. The bomb had been found with thirty minutes left on it (apparently, the terrorists actually wanted to get out before it blew up) and Q had been called in almost the instant Mycroft found out.

“ _I can’t believe you are in the field again.”_ R whispered over the comm.

“I’m in London, just on the other side of the river, hardly in the field.” Q rolled his eyes as he worked on the bomb.

 _“I can’t believe M sent you of all people_.”

“Mycroft wanted someone competent and his MI5 cronies obviously didn’t make the cut, besides, my hands are damn steady and that is what this particular bomb needs.”

“ _Just don’t blow yourself up.”_

“Of course not, now please shut up, this is the tricky part.” Q sighed, working at the innards of the bomb until he smiled in satisfaction. “Alright, all clear.” He slid out from underneath it and brushed off his trousers before looking at his watch. “Under three minutes, a new record for this particular monster. It really is a complex beauty.”

“ _You can sweet-talk the bomb later, Q. MI5 is coming in to collect what’s left_.”

“Thank you, I’m sure I can make it back to the branch under my own power. Thank you for the moral support.” Q smiled, wiping the sweat off his brow.

“ _Like you needed it. Tanner actually said you’re free to go home today_.”

“Why?”

“ _Forced leave. He says you work too_ _hard_.”

“Tell him I’ll take a day off when he does.”

“ _I heard that and I’ll take the day off. God knows I need it_.”

“MI6 won’t survive without us.”

 _“It better. There’s a car waiting for you Q, have a good evening_.”

“You too, Bill. Q out.” Q pulled his earpiece out as men walked in for the bomb. A familiar black car was waiting for him. The door opened and a familiar woman got out, tapping away at her phone. “Stare at that screen too long and you’ll get a headache.”

“Hello, Q.” She lowered her phone and looked up at him with a smile. “You did well with that bomb, sir.”

“Don’t call me sir, I’m off work.”

“So you’re going home then?”

“It seems disarming bombs is a full day’s work. The chief sent me home.”

“Lovely, you deserve days off.”

“Would be better with someone at home.”

“How has that been going?” She asked as they both got into the back seat, her phone forgotten, even as it went off. He smiled and blushed. “Well then?”

“Very well. It is so nice. I…I’m completely in love and he’s…he’s absolutely sweet. He’s lovely.”

“Only a Holmes finds the sweetness in assassins.”

“Says you, of all people.” Lisa smirked at him and winked.

“We all have our types, darling.”

“We do.” Q hummed.

“Well, as long as there is love who gives a damn, right?”

“Right.” Q nodded.

“This is your stop, kiddo.”

“Lovely to see you again.”

“And you too, we don’t get to talk as much anymore.”

“I promise to sneak you some cupcakes sometime soon.”

“You’d better. Fridays are horrible without sweets, and Mycroft’s on a diet again, so it’s not like he’ll supply any.”

“I won’t let you down, promise.”

“Love you too, kiddo. Go on now, enjoy the rest of your day.”

“I will. You have a good day as well.”

“Thank you, Hamish.”

“You’re welcome, Lisa.” Q smiled and got out of the car walking into his home. He closed the door and sighed, putting his bag down.

“You’re alright.” James sighed in relief.

“James?” Q smiled and huffed a bit when James pulled him into a tight hug.

“Got home thirty minutes ago and have been pacing ever since. I heard about that bomb and that they’d sent you in.”

“Oh ye of little faith. I had it well in hand.” Q chuckled as James peppered his neck in kisses. “I’m fine, I really am. I have grease everywhere and won’t be eating Sushi for a while, but I’m fine.” Q promised. “I need to get cleaned up, how do you feel about Italian for dinner?” Q called as he managed to slink out of James’ arms and up the stairs to grab clothes.

“You’re not going back to work?”

“I would, but I have a rather handsome man at home.”

“Q…?”

“Right, and Tanner ordered that I go home, but other than that, it’s mostly that you’re home.” Q called back.

“The usual for you?” Q walked out of his bedroom holding a pair of pajamas and one of James’ shirts.

“I have a usual?” Q asked, leaning against the railing.

“Yeah, you do.”

“No I don’t. I don’t get the same thing every time.”

“No you don’t, but you do get the risotto more often than any other type of food you get.”

“How…?”

“I may not be a genius but I am a spy, I pick up on thinks. Just like how I know about the reason why you put lemon in your Earl Grey and how I know about what’s in the floorboard under your bed even when I’ve never opened it.”

“Damn spies.” Q huffed before he headed for the bathroom.

“Would you like the oolong brewed for dinner as well?” James called with a smirk. He knew every tea Q drank with every type of food. James didn’t have to see him to know that Q had rolled his eyes and hid his face in his hands, likely muttering ‘fucking spies’ as he did so.

800Q8

Q was out of the shower just after food had arrived. James had plated it up and sat waiting on the couch. “Thank you, James.” Q kissed his forehead as he took his plate and sat down next to him. They ate in mostly companionable silence, aside from a few playful nudges when they tried to steal food from one another’s plates. James took away the plates when they had finished and brought back a small bowl of strawberries. “You didn’t.”

“I know you like them, and you’ve had a rough day.” James shrugged.

“Three things. First you are an utter romantic, second I have ages of blackmail on you, and third it really wasn’t that rough of a day.”

“First, only with you. Second, you like me too much to blackmail me. Third, you had the lives of everyone in London in your hands, you had to have had a little bit of worry.”

“I’m used to it, I suppose.” Q shrugged. “Sure there was adrenaline, I was under a bomb, but I work like that every time there’s a crisis, you must too. It’s commonplace after a while. I just have to stay calm where others can’t and save as many as I can. It’s a job. And not the first bomb I’ve disarmed in London.”

“How many is this?” James asked, popping a strawberry into his mouth.

“Seventy two. Some, of course were tiny, but they all count. I only fucked up one of them.”

“One blew up?”

“No, I just, couldn’t figure out how to disarm it. The Woman had rigged it so that opening the very case would make it explode I was under ten at the time.”

“Woman?”

“Irene Adler, probably the only person who ever really made my papa jealous and the only other person to intrigue my dad. She’s also one of the few people who know I am their actual son. That went down well.”

“Why is she called the Woman?”

“She wanted to be remembered as the one who beat my dad, but she lost in the end.” Q shrugged reaching for a strawberry. “Yup, still keeping the blackmail on you, but these are delicious, thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” James smiled.

“How was America?” Q asked, popping another slice of strawberry into his mouth and leaning against, James’ side.

“Tedious. Though the CIA were rather kind, do I have you to thank for that?”

“They were not helpful to 008 the last time we had to go in there, so I took down all of their systems until they played nice, I just gave them a reminder so that they’d treat you nice.”

“You are amazing.” James smiled. “Could you threaten the people next time though, because a few of them were awful?”

“Already on a possible terrorist watch list for them and they don’t even know my name, sorry, but I’m not pushing it. Stupid people are everywhere, I can’t possibly make them all smart by scaring them.”

“We could try.”

“That would involve a lot of work and I’m not up to it.”

“Not even for a strawberry?” James offered him one.

“Nope, but I will have the strawberry.” Q snatched it from him and popped it into his mouth.

“You can’t have something for free.”

“I think you’ll find I just did.” Q smirked.

“I can’t allow that.” James smiled and stole a slow sweet kiss from Q, loving the taste of strawberries and Q mingled together. Q smiled into the kiss and wrapped his arms around him.

“Paid in full then?”

“Definitely.” James chuckled, pressing another kiss to Q’s lips.

“Like strawberries then?”

“I like you, Hamish, strawberries are just a plus.” James commented, swooping in for another kiss. The strawberries were forgotten in favor of a proper make-out session. Q chuckled as he wound up lying flat against the sofa, James sprawled over him. He supported and kept his weight off of Q with his elbow on the arm of the sofa, one hand tangled in Q’s damp curls. Kisses and gentle nips were intermingled the gasps for air and breathless chuckles.

James’ free hand worked under Q’s shirt as fingernails blunted by layers of clothing ran down his back. James’ calloused fingers ran over smooth skin and Q arched up into James as they traced over sensitive skin. Both of them were in similar states. Q slowly managed to pull his lips from James’. “James?”

“What?” James murmured against his throat.

“Do you think this should move to the bedroom?” It was an offer and a question. It was quite clear that Q felt alright with this, he was fine with it going further, but he was also fine if James wasn’t. If this was where they were, that was fine, but Q was alright with more. James smiled and pressed a kiss to his lips.

“It should, wouldn’t be very comfortable here.”

Q smiled, a shy smile that suddenly reminded James of Q’s age. This was everything that should have happened to him the first time. He resolved to be as gentle as he could, and remember that Q might be twenty-two, but he had never had the normal teenage years to experiment and explore. He had lead a life as far from ordinary as could be possible, and had gone to work at MI6 before his peers were done with school.

James sat up and took Q’s hand, pulling the young man with him to the bedroom. He stopped to turn on the lights in the room, and Q reached for him, wrapping his arms around the agent with a content sigh.

“Feels good,” Q murmured against James’ lips. He walked James backwards to the bed, and pulled the man down beside him. “Keep kissing me?” James tasted like strawberries and Italian food, nothing like lead and iron laced water and grime.

But that was all James could smell, the wet metal, and the tears streaming down his own cheeks. He could hear himself pleading not to have to do this, not to have to do this to the young man he had come to care about. He could taste the blood from biting his lip, trying not to scream, as the hours of echoes of Q’s screams rattled around in his panicked mind.

“James,” Q shook him gently. “James, look at me,” he pleaded. “We aren’t there anymore, we aren’t in China. We are in my bed and you aren’t hurting me. James, open your eyes, tell me what you see.”

James’ eyes flew open and he scrambled backwards, falling off the bed with a thump. He ran for the bathroom, getting violently sick once the door slammed closed. Q sighed and went to get a towel. He knocked and opened the bathroom door cautiously. There was James on the bathroom floor next to the toilet, shivering. He wet the towel with warm water and wiped his face.

“Hey, James,” he tried to make eye contact but the agent stared glassy eyed at the wall, trembling. “James, I don’t blame you. You didn’t hurt me. You did everything you could to protect me.” He gave up and sat on the cool floor, his back against the wall. He pulled James’ head onto his lap and covered them both with his robe. And he sat, waiting for sleep to take them, because they were safe, as long as they kept the darkness away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much love.


	29. J Squared

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John and James have a talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm posting early again. I know, but whatever, right? There's a bit of comfort here and John, because xphil98197 is amazing and decided we needed more John. I agree. And also say thank you (again) for helping me with everything.

J Squared

 

Strangely, when James managed to open his eyes it wasn’t to the darkness he’d dreamt about. It wasn’t cold and he wasn’t starving to death, even if his stomach wasn’t quite normal. His head was rested across warm legs and his body was wrapped in a robe. He jolted upright and looked at Q, who frankly looked uncomfortable with how his body was positioned and the fact that the robe that had kept James warm was not around him.

“James?” Q asked, blinking and twisting around, reaching for his fallen glasses. “Are you alright?”

“Not really.” Q frowned and reached out to touch him, but he winced back and Q lowered his hand.

“Right… I’ll just go and make breakfast, alright? You just...take your time, okay?”

“Breakfast?” James asked after Q had stood up.

“Yes, you need to eat something, even if it’s small. Come down when you’re ready.” Q smiled gently, wanting to press a kiss to the older man’s hair or forehead or hug him or tell him it was all alright, but he knew it would just upset him more. Q walked down the stairs and sighed at the sight of the strawberries that were left on the coffee table. He had known it wasn’t going to be easy, but that didn’t mean he liked it and he most certainly didn’t like the pain James was in.

Q picked up his phone and dialed a memorized number, pressing the phone between his shoulder and ear as he began to clean up the remains of the previous night and start working on breakfast. “This is, Tanner.”

“Hello, just calling in, I don’t think I’ll make it in today.”

“Are you alright?”

“I’m fine, just need a personal day. I’ll be available remotely for emergencies and of course I’ll come in if the sky starts falling, but I need a day off.”

“No harm in that, Q. Honestly HR will be please that you’ve taken the day off, they were getting fussy about down time.”

“They should worry about you.”

“They know I’m a lost cause.”

“They’ll learn about me one day. Thank you, Bill.”

“Have a good day.”

“Thank you, you too.” Q sighed before he hung up. Not likely… Q sighed before starting to mix together a simple pancake batter. He heard the shower turn on above and sighed in relief, at least James was moving. It was a little more than twenty minutes when the shower went off and a little less than thirty when Q finished making a syrup for the pancakes and started on the pancakes.

James made it down the stairs and slowly sat down at the table, not saying a word, eyes still glassy and distant. “We didn’t have syrup, so I made some, I hope you don’t mind, but it’s probably not as good as the real thing. I did try. It’s somewhere between caramel and syrup though.” Q said, putting a plate in front of James, along with a cup of Earl Grey.

“Thank you.” James barely got it out.

“You’re welcome.” Q turned and put batter in the pan for himself. Six seconds later, there was a knock on the door. “Not right now.” Q huffed and walked to the door, only for it to open before he got to it. He went to reach for the nearest gun before he saw his parents. “It was Mycroft wasn’t it?” Q deduced in a second.

“He panicked and dragged me along, though it is rather nice to see you, kiddo.” John smiled, hugging his son. “Are you alright?” He asked checking for a fever with the back of his hand.

“I’m fine, not sick, promise. I just needed a day. Could you leave? I hate to sound rude, but please leave.” Q started trying to nudge them away but Sherlock’s eyes looked him up and down.

“You slept with him.”

“Dad, it’s not, don’t, just leave it and go. Please.”

“Did he hurt you?”

“No, no, just go.”

“You’re upset and obviously was with him last night given the love bites on your neck. Where is he?”

“It isn’t like that, please, just go. This is between us.”

“Not anymore, my son my problem.”

“You don’t understand.” Sherlock walked past Q in favor of searching for James, the smell of breakfast leading him right to the agent.

“What did you do to my…?” Sherlock looked James up and down and his mouth fell open slightly. “Oh that’s what you meant. Something triggered him, PTSD. Is that why you slept on the floor last n-” Q punched him, hurting his fist and Sherlock’s cheek at the same time.

“Get the hell out of my house, now. We’ll deal with this. You need to leave, this is not your place.” The pancake on the stove was burnt. “I won’t tell you again.”

“Sherlock, Hamish, go for a walk. And get some ice on your knuckles, Q, you work with your hands for God’s sake.”

“What?”

“Just go, trust me.”

“Papa, I’m not-”

“You can come back, just give us a little while. I’ll call you in a bit. Go bother Mrs. Hudson or something like that. Sherlock, now.” John warned and both Sherlock and Hamish escaped at the tone he’d used. John didn’t say a word to James as he walked by and threw out the burnt pancake. He started another, plated it and sat down across from the agent who had only managed a nibble of his pancakes and a sip of his tea. John finished the one on his plate and drank from the cup of tea Q had left behind, untouched.

“Sherlock is protective of Hamish, of both of us,” John looked at the agent, whose head was bowed. “The Holmes men underestimate how strong we are, and partly its our fault. We are always the rock they lean on, and when we need something, we don’t know how to ask for help.” He frowned.

“James, look at me,” he used his Captain Watson voice that allowed for no argument. “Hamish- Q told us. He told us what happened. Ignore Sherlock for a minute, he’s worried about his son, and well, he was never the articulate one in the family. Q needs you, and you need to forgive yourself. He isn’t angry with you, and we don’t hold what happened against you. It was the best decision in a bloody awful situation, and you protected him as best as you could. Stop hurting yourself over what you did.”

“But I hurt him.”

“Yes,” John nodded. “But you also saved him.” He touched James’ hand. “It was going to be you his first time anyway, even if the mission didn’t happen. He’s been waiting for years, ever since you lent him that coat.”

“Doesn’t make it better or right, it’s still rape. It just means he trusted me and I fucked it up.”

“Ok, so tell me how it would have been better if you refused?” John looked him square in the eye and challenged him. “Were they going to be gentle? Were they going to be here now to hold him?”

“No.”

“Well,” John cleared his throat. “At the risk of sounding like I’m giving you the shovel talk, what do you want from Hamish?”

At least this time he hadn’t been ambushed on the streets for this particular talk. The question was a difficult one to answer, considering it had never been asked of James, mostly because he figured he’d never live long enough for there to be a need to answer the question and everyone else agreed with that line of thought.

“James, the Holmes men are a whole breed unto themselves,” John smiled warmly. “Don’t underestimate the way they love. Sherlock, he put me back together after Afghanistan. Tell Hamish you need time, and he will be there next to you. Just don’t push him away and break his heart. THAT, I won’t forgive.”

“Where do I even start?” It wasn’t necessarily in the agent’s biology to be open with people, especially about the things that made him afraid. He was an agent, he wasn’t allowed to be hurt or afraid, injury usually meant death. “He says he trusts me, but I can’t see how that’s possible. Unless it’s some twisted sort of Stockholm syndrome. I just, don’t understand. I don’t trust myself with him and I know...I know better than anyone that I don’t want to hurt him.”

“He knows what he wants,” John tells him. “Trust him, even if you don’t trust yourself. Now go, find him. I think Sherlock might need rescuing right about now,” John put the plates in the sink. “Oh, and James, he already did the hard part. Sherlock isn’t the only detective in the family. Tell him how you feel, it's only fair. He already told you.”

“Where do I look?”

“He’s a horrible snoop,” John laughed. “I doubt he made it to the corner. I’ll let him know if I run into him, that you’re looking.” John squeezed James’ shoulder as he walked by, before heading out the front door. Q and Sherlock hadn’t even made the corner. They were both just outside the property, both sitting on the cement, both smoking. “Sherlock, Hamish, smoking, really?”

“That or punching, smoking was easier, and less harmful for my fingers.” Q sighed, crushing the cigarette as he stood. “Is he alright?”

“You should probably pop in and talk to him.” John shrugged. “He loves you though. Remember that. I think the biggest worry that man has is hurting you.”

“He won’t.”

“Make him understand that then.”

“He’s stubborn, how am I supposed to make him understand that?”

“Be more stubborn.” Sherlock stated. “It worked on John.”

“And make him talk. He needs to, and not to some shrink or doctor, to you.”

“Thanks Papa, Dad,” Hamish hugged them both. “It will work, won’t it?”

“I think it will,” John says, turning back, his arm around Sherlock. “Go to him, so he doesn’t get lost.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	30. Talking and Going

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James and Q talk things out and James thinks a change of scenery might help him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry you guys haven't been getting my usual amount of work. I had planned on another AI!Q post this week, but then I spent an entire week sick, not fun, still trying to recuperate. But I remembered to post this for you guys, so bonus points for the one with the sniffles from hell.
> 
> This one is an emotional rollercoaster, a bit. I'm sorry for the angst in advance. Xphil98197 and I went back and forth on this and at times the angst was very high. It was brilliantly angsty. (TW for mentions of rape)

Talking and Going

 

Q stepped back into his house and set the security again before walking into the kitchen. Q frowned at the very little nibbles James had taken and sighed when he realized his papa had drank his tea. Q rolled his eyes and went about making a cup for himself before he sat down next to James.

 “Hi,” Q smiled up at him. James didn’t smiled back, but he did look at him.

 “Hello.”

 “You should try to sip on the tea, it will help you settle your stomach. We can talk when you’re ready.”

 “You just cut right to the point.”

 “I am my dad’s son. It happens.” Q said, making his own tea before sitting back down at the table with James. They were quiet for a few minutes and James managed another sip of his tea in the time Q downed his.

 “You really aren’t upset?”

 “Of course, I’m upset.” Q commented. “You’re hurting, I’m upset over that.”

 “About last night, I mean. I didn’t scare you?”

 “No. You didn’t. I’m not scared with you around. I mean I was nervous, first time and all that, but I wasn’t scared, not for a moment.” Q promised. James knew what liars looked like and he knew what Q looked like when he lied. Q wasn’t lying. “What happened? Did I do something that set you off?”

 “No… I was fine and kissing you and then. We went to your room and then I could just smell it, that place. I could taste nothing but that water on you, water and tears and blood. I could hear you screaming.” Q gently grabbed James’ hand. James started to jerk back but Q threaded their fingers together.

 “Hey, it’s alright.” Q smiled gently and James slowly relaxed. “Alright…so what do you think it was? What do you think it was that set it off?”

 “I don’t- I don’t know,” James shivered. “I haven’t ever had a flashback like that before. I can handle my own pain, it’s seeing you hurt-”

 “I’m not hurt anymore,” Q squeezed their fingers. “I’m not screaming. Look at me, I’m ok.” He lifted his shirt. “Look, I’ve even been eating a little.”

 “Do you know what he told me?” James laughed, a sound that felt more like a cut off sob. “He told me I should trust you, even if I don’t trust myself.”

 “Yes,” Q nodded with a smile. “That’s something Papa would say.”

 “He also told me that I owe it to you to tell you how I feel.”

 “Well, lying is hardly going to help at this point in time.” Q couldn’t stop himself from saying it, only realizing it came out a bit too dry and sarcastic, likely not very helpful for someone like James, who never revealed himself, not fully. “Sorry. I meant. I mean that it can only help and I’m here, you have to know that.”

 “I know you are,” James looked down. “Every time I tell someone how I feel, or even admit how I feel, they get hurt.”

 “I already know,” Q said, matter of factly. “I think Papa told you to tell me, because you need to know the world won’t end if you do. And because if one of the Holmes men can, anyone can. Come here,” he pulled James on to his lap.

 “And what if, after I say it, one of us gets hurt?” James laid his head down on Q’s shoulder and tried not to meet his eyes.

 “We don’t work in an office, we’re going to get hurt,” Q reasoned. “And sometimes it’s going to be us hurting each other with our words. I’ve watched Papa and Dad for years, and they fight. Hurt is as inevitable as fighting is. But they work together, to keep going, and we can too.”

 “But-” James still couldn’t meet his eyes. “I- what about if I don’t come home?”

 “Well, I’ve dealt with someone I love not coming home before. It hurts, more that I can explain. You’ve felt it too. It hurts, I suspect worse than anything, but the world can’t just end right there. I’ll have to figure it out. It’s no different from anyone else in the world. Anyone could have a loved one accidently killed in a car accident. You hurt, you try your hardest, and eventually you can function again. It’ll never get better, but there can be control in the chaos. Like it or not, one of us is going to end up dying first, natural causes or not.”

 “Why are you so calm about this?” James asked helplessly. “You’re so matter of fact. And it’s breaking my heart just thinking about it.”

 “We can either take a chance and enjoy what we can, or not try,” Q said. “And then we are guaranteed to miss out. There is no escaping death or pain, that will always be apart of life. We can’t always escape death, so I’d rather spend the time I have being happy and in love then worrying about the pain that will inevitably follow. We have a chance to be happy and that’s worth focusing on. If you spend all your life worrying about things you can’t stop you’ll miss every beautiful thing in between. I don’t mean to be cold if that’s what you think I’m being. I just would rather see you happy and personally I’d rather be happy, rather than constantly worried. We can’t stop the rain, but we can enjoy the sun while it’s here.”

 “I,” James nodded, his throat tight. “I love you, Hamish. Whatever happens.”

 “I know, I love you too,” Q squeezed him tight. “Let’s go sit somewhere that fits two, my kitchen chairs aren’t too comfortable for the task.” He pulled James with him to the couch.

 “And you’re ok with this?” James asked, his voice hesitant.

 “I never gave back your coat, did I?” Q laughed.

 “My coat?” James was puzzled. “From the Christmas party? That’s what happened to it.” He laughed.

“I’ve been in love with you since you lent it to me,” he admitted. “Do you really think I would turn you down now?”

 “That’s a really long time,” James smiled. “Especially for someone so young. You should have moved on a long time ago.”

“Between bringing all of you home, and disarming bombs?” Q shook his head. “When did I have time? And in my family, we only give out our heart once. I never ‘got over you’, because you have been a constant. It wasn’t a one time attraction.”

 “How can you know that?”

 “My uncle isn’t the most modest of people. But I suspect he sort of said it best. We live in a world filled with goldfish. We can predict people and see through people and manipulate them however we please. But then, there’s always one that stands out. One person that surprises us and makes us better. I’m probably the kindest when it comes to the rest of humanity in my family, but I’d never met anyone who made me want to be better before. You just dropped out of nowhere and I wished I could be normal, wished I was a better human, wished that I could possibly get even a single glance from you. You make me smarter, happier. I don’t know how to explain it. I just know. I’ve been told dad, uncle Myc, and even my grandfather just felt the same way. We’re made human suddenly, and rather than being terrified we’re happy. It’s impossible to describe.”

 “You really are a wonder,” James shook his head. “You make sense out of all the madness going on in my head. I suppose I can’t argue with you, and I don’t want to.”

 “Arguing is possible, I just can’t promise you’ll be right.” Q smiled warmly before he became more serious. “So James, what is it? You can trust me.”

 “I didn’t think I would feel like this again,” James sighed. “Excited, wanting to make plans. And you’re still so young. I don’t want to tie you down if you decide in a few years this wasn’t for you.”

 “Tie _me_ down? Maybe in a few years you’ll understand just who is tying who down, secret agent man.” Q chuckled. “Excitement isn’t all of it though.”

 “No,” James agreed. “It’s hard work. And someone with you while you do it.”

 “No, I meant with you. That is not the only thing that’s circling in your head. It isn’t the only thing that’s got you worried. There is so much more. I can’t help you fight all of the shadows if I don’t know what forms they take.” Q sighed and shook his head, pulling his feet up underneath him as he sat, one hand under his chin, fidgeting. “Excitement isn’t something that brings pain. I can understand being nervous about trying to make something as elaborate as a relationship work, but that isn’t what hurt you last night.”

 “Digging at that already?”

 “A doctor treats what’s wrong, James. And if we find more on the way we tend to that too.”

 “So you’re my doctor now?”

 “You’re mine, you don’t even notice it. I don’t eat or sleep sometimes and you walk right in and fix it. You notice the problems and cracks and you walk right in and tend to them. We’re meant to do that. We’re sort of a unit now. But you are an agent James, you don’t show your wounds, you leave them inside to fester. I could stare you down for an hour and deduce them out of you, because it would take hours to see through your mask, maybe a day even, but I can’t not really. You trust me and I would just be violating that trust if I took something from you that you didn’t want to see.” Q lowered his hand to his lap and looked down at it. “So I’ll sit here and I’ll wait. I don’t know what happened to you last night and I can’t stop it, I can’t help you if I don’t know what it is. I won’t stretch the boundaries of your trust, I’ll let you do that. Maybe you don’t even know what really did it yourself and that may take time and I can wait. I’ve loved you for a good five years. I have all the time in the world, you’re important and I won’t see you hurt. I don’t like seeing you hurting.”

 “I’ve been hurting for a long time,” James admitted. “You really are amazing, you know that? I don’t think anyone has wanted me as myself, not what I could do for them, for a long time. Or ever.”

 “I try my best. But why would anyone in their right mind want anything other than you? Must not be many smart people living in this world. All the better for me.”

 “They want someone that comes home at night,” James took Q’s hand. “They want someone that doesn’t sleep with other people for work. Or they want someone that they can talk about with their friends, not someone who doesn’t tell them where he is when he leaves town.Ordinary people, who don’t work for Six, they don’t understand how I live. Why I have to leave town at the last minute, and why there is a gun under my pillow. The last person I loved, it didn’t end well. And that was years ago.”

 “The gun is actually strapped to the base of the headboard in my room, in case you wondered, less likely for an accident to happen. I’m not technically supposed to have it though, so don’t go telling people about it.” Q sighed. “Why is it so hard for you to believe that I love you and that I trust you and that I know you can’t and won’t hurt me? What can’t you accept for yourself? Why are you so afraid that you’re going to hurt me? I mean, you carried me out of that damn place, you kept me sane in that place, you made sure I ate and drank. I suppose I can’t understand everything, but still...I’m curious.”

 “Because I DID hurt you,” James was frustrated. He got up and started pacing, unable to meet Q’s eyes. “And every time I look at you, I see you there. I see you hurt, and its me that did it. I didn’t beat you, but I was the one that raped you. You can’t tell me that’s what you were hoping your first time to be like. It should have been something special, not the best case scenario in a fucked up set of choices.”

 “It wasn’t what I wanted, no. It hurt, I can’t lie and say it didn’t. I wasn’t scared though, not really. I knew you’d do everything you could for me. I was afraid of them, of what they’d do to me, of what they’d do to you or Chris. But do you really want to know what the worst part was? It wasn’t you, because I trust you, and I know you did everything you could for me. There was that voice in my head for months afterwards. His voice, the one who told us what was going to happen, what would happen if you didn’t do it. That voice haunted me. I could separate it in my head. There was me, hurt, nearly dead, you and Chris that I needed to protect no matter what, and there was them, him in particular. He hurt me, ordered all of my torture. He hurt Chris. He hurt you by forcing you to do what you did. His voice haunted me, not you. I felt safe with you. I felt the worst when he fucking kissed me and shoved me to the ground than I think I’ve ever felt. I never think of you and hurt in the same category for that night. Not for that whole time. I know it sounds stupid, because technically anyone else would say you did the raping, but you didn’t, he did. Technically he raped us both, it’s not like you wanted that. Both of us forced into it.” Q shook his head and wiped a tear off of his face.

 “No, I didn’t want it to happen that way. No one wants that. But I don’t feel pain when you touch me. I don’t go back there when you touch me or kiss me. I go back there when I have nightmares. I go back there when I hear Chinese men talking. I nearly killed a man from accounting my first day back because he scared me. I feel safe when you touch me. I feel like no matter how bad it gets you’ll do everything you can to protect me, even if it means hurting yourself, because that’s what you did. You did something you think disgusting and rotten because you wanted to keep me safe and you knew they would ruin me. You put yourself in a position you absolutely hate, to protect me. You’re not the monster in my nightmares. You aren’t my rapist. You and I were both raped at gunpoint, by a man you keep chasing out of my head with these right here.” Q pulled free the tags around his neck. “Still protecting me, protecting me from the silence when he starts talking again. Please know that I have never thought of you as someone who could hurt me, because you wouldn’t. Besides, I think our real first time should be a lot better than that and I don’t want that bastard taking more than what he already has from us. I can’t let him have anymore from me and I sure as hell can’t let him take anymore from you.” Q kept his head down, not looking up at James as he wiped a few more stray tears out of his face.

 “Let me make it up to you,” James pleaded. “Something… let me plan something. Maybe it will help me, help me feel like there is something that I can do to fix it.”

 “There is nothing to make up to me. I want you to be happy, to stop feeling guilty...to stop feeling hurt. Start worrying about you. I’m okay. I’m fine. I worry about you.”

 “But I want to give you something, something special,” James protested. “I don’t want that to be what you remember. Have you ever even been on a date?”

 “Isn’t that what we did last night? Dinner and telly? Or that time with the gelato?”

 “A real date! Where I open your door, and pull out your chair. And then we watch the sun come up on the balcony of some fancy hotel, where we haven’t been to sleep yet,” James spun out the fantasy with his words.

 “I suppose we haven’t done that. We just sort of happened.”

 “Usually MI6 puts me up, so I’ve acquired expensive taste,” James smiled. “And no one to share it with so far. Do you work this weekend?”

 “I always work, but I could take it off. If asked nicely.”

 “May I escort you somewhere without a cellphone except for emergencies, and spoil you?” James asked. He got down on his knees next to the couch. “Have you ever been to Paris?”

 “No, I’ve never been. But not even a laptop? Not even a little one?”

 “You will be too busy to even think about it,” James took Q’s hands. “But you can bring whatever you like. I was just hoping you might be otherwise… occupied.”

 “Cell phone for emergencies? I suppose I could live without a laptop, but I do get anxious without one around. Tanner will think I’m dying when I ask for the weekend off.” Q chuckled.

 “Bring whatever you might need,” James laughed. “How many of them do you think will put it together when we both ask for a free weekend?”

 “I think R will lose her head and attempt to call and M will certainly know, not to mention my uncle and my whole family. We can’t let them know where we’re going or we’ll be followed.”

 “I’d better steal you away more often, so it stops being such a newsworthy event,” James stood and pulled Q up with him. “Throw some things in a bag for us, and I will do dishes.”

 “How many guns do you think we’ll need, one or two? Just in case. I know you don’t go anywhere without one, and I typically don’t either.”

 “Two apiece?” James looked thoughtful. “Just in case. You can never be too careful. And pack something to wear for a fancy restaurant.”

 “Never let my dad know that I took to heart all of his lessons about formal wear. Honestly, he’d be singing ‘I told you so’ for years.” Q sighed, heading up the stairs. His dad was all about flair, his papa was more about comfort and function. He’d always fallen on his papa’s side of that argument, but he still kept one good suit, just in case. He began to pack the bags, putting two of the guns in them, knowing that both he and James would feel better if they both had one on them, bless the paranoia of being an MI6 agent.

 Q debated on which clothes James would likely want, but picked out his personal favorite suit that James owned, because he could. He walked back down the stairs, two bags in hand and two small guns hidden under his clothes, not to James whose eyes met them almost instantly. “I can dry them, you know. You don’t have to do all of the work.”

 “Grab our passports from the safe and book us the first two tickets into Paris you can,” James instructed. “And see if the Hotel Residence Foch has a balcony room available. And tell them we want strawberries, and champagne.”

 “Foch, alright. I’ll call Tanner too, I’ll even ask him to be discreet, maybe we can get most of the way there before I start getting calls.” Q said, placing his laptop on his lap and opening it, quickly typing.

 “Turn off your phone, and tell Tanner to relay the message that you are being taken on a date,” James suggested. “And tell your Papa, he might be able to talk some sense into the rest of them.”

 “You haven’t spent enough time around my family. I’ll have to have every camera around that hotel put on a loop so we’re not spied on, no, perhaps every camera around multiple hotels, actually so Mycroft doesn’t send people to spy on us. He does get fussy when I take away his control. Alright got us a balcony room. Oh, the view is lovely.” Q smiled before picking up his phone and sending two quick messages, one to Tanner and one to John. Then he thought about it and sent a third to Greg.

  _Please keep Mycroft in line. I would like to not be followed at the moment. I’d owe you. -H_

 “Alright, passports.” Q closed his laptop and headed for the safe.

 “John? Hi, this is James. I was wondering if I could talk to you,” James spoke softly into his cell phone. “I want to take Hamish to Paris, for the weekend. But I wanted to get your permission. And also, he seems to think that Mycroft will be watching us. Could you get me in touch with him? Thank you John, I will take care of him. I promise.”

 No sooner did James hang up, than his cell phone rang.

 “James Bond,” he answered. “Hello Mr. Holmes. Yes, I’d like to ask you a favor. I want to take Hamish for a weekend in Paris, and he said you have a habit of watching. I don’t mind if you send some people to protect us, but I’d like some privacy with him. Yes, thank you, Sir. I appreciate that.”

 James walked in to find Q pulling the passports out of the safe.

“I have some good news for you, you don’t have to worry about your family,” he kissed Q’s hair. “I asked your Papa if I could take you to Paris this weekend. And I asked them to give us some space for the weekend.”

 “That worked?”

 “Well, they agreed,” James said. “As long as they are telling the truth, it worked.”

 “I trust my papa, can’t trust the others as far as I can throw them. But thank you for talking to them.”

 “Have you seen my keys?” James asked. “We can leave the car in short term parking at the airport, it’s only a couple of days.”

 “Table by the door.”

 “Ok, I’m ready when you are,” James nodded. “I’ll bring the bags to the car.”

 Q nearly protested, stating that he could carry his own bag, but then he recalled James mentioning opening doors and pulling out chairs, likely James was including carrying the bags in that list. Q smiled and kissed his cheek, thanking everything he could think of when James didn’t pull away before he started to head for the door.

 James swung both the bags over his shoulder, and held out the Belstaff coat for Q to slip on. Q smiled and shook his head, reaching for a different coat on the rack, one James had no recollection of Q wearing, but Q slipped it on and James recognized it faintly as being his own. “I like this one better.”

 “Ahh, that one,” James smiled and leaned in to kiss him. He opened the door, lifting the door keys out of Q’s fingers. “Good thing we share an apartment now, my clothes won’t go missing.”

 “No promises, I ruined one of your shirts in a lab incident once, replaced it before you ever found out. You know, I probably shouldn’t admit to theft and destruction of property, forget I mentioned it.”

 “Go!” James shooed him out the door with a laugh. “Before I ask what else you’ve been hiding. And then I really won’t let you out of my sight again.”

 “Best you don’t know.” Q patted his shoulder and left the house, turning on the alarm as he went.

 James pulled out every bit of charm he could think of, to spoil the young man. He opened his car door, and buckled his seatbelt. When they arrived at the airport, he hurried to open Q’s door, and take his hand to help him out.

 “One might think you were trying to get on my good side.” Q smiled, taking the hand.

 “Your good side?” James shook his head with a soft smile. “No, I’m trying to find mine to show you.”

 “Don’t look too hard, that’s how you miss things. By the way, you are Sterling on this particular passport and I am Jason...Franks? Apparently. I never use these and I have more fake passports than secret identities, honestly.”

 “Ahh, Mr. Franks,” James offered his arm. “Have you see the sun set over the Eiffel tower before? It’s not to be missed, or so I have been told.”

 “Never seen it. Never been. And if I had been it would have been with my parents and they don’t travel to sight see, it’s more of a tour of every slum and creep serial killer manner ever, when we traveled. Should be a sight though.”

 “Prepare to be astonished,” James pulled his lover into his arms, the bags sliding down to their feet. “Slums can have their own charm, I love nothing better than a place that tourists know nothing about. But this weekend is for you, all the things you deserve.”

 “Sweet of you, Mr. Sterling.”

 “Now tell me, what do you know about the Mile High Club?” James’ grin was infectious.

“That I’m not in it and also that it is really not a Mile High Club. Technically, average cruising height is nearly seven miles up, so the whole idea of it is actually a bit of a lie.” Q smirked back.

 “Oh for goodness sake,” James groaned. “Always correct to the last detail. How about the seven mile high club, then? The seats in first class are usually fairly private.”

 “Suppose we’ll have to wait and see. Let the chips fall where they may. You are a gambling man after all.”

 “Only when it doesn’t matter,” James looks serious, suddenly. “I would never gamble with you.”

 “I don’t know, it mattered in Montenegro. I remember having to save your life, maybe you shouldn’t gamble when it matters, you nearly lost your life for a hand as I recall. Thank God the kid with spots was around.”Q teased lightly.

 “I might gamble for my own safety, but never yours,” James shakes his head. “And you did save me. You have more than once, when I was too foolish to take care of myself.”

 “I just thank God my papa’s a doctor and that I have a very good memory. I might have lost you otherwise.”

 “No losing each other, not now,” James checks the departures board. “We just found each other. The world can wait its turn for a bit.”

 “I couldn’t agree more.”

 “You’ll have to tell me which flight is ours,” James shifts the bags to the other shoulder. “And then we can have dinner on the balcony when we get there, and watch the sun go down.”

 “306,” Q pointed.

 “Well, lead on then, Mr. Franks,” James smiles. “Paris is waiting.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	31. Whatever it Takes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James and Q arrive in Paris, things, bad and good, happen. In that order.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm finally starting to feel better, which is awesome, therefore this is a few hours early.  
> There are some triggers in here, but they aren't too awful.  
> This chapter gets NSFW at the end, you can thank xphil98197 for that bit, because I don't write NSFW things.  
> I had to add tags I've never added before, so that was new.  
> Anyways, enjoy.

Whatever it Takes

 

Q sat down in his seat, rolling his eyes as James lifted their bags into the overhead compartment. It was sort of ridiculous in an endearing way. “You know you don’t have to do everything for me, right? I’ve managed for a while. Enough to take care of nine grown children who like things that go boom with bright lights.”

“Shhh, its my chance to spoil you,” James reminds him. “Do you want a drink?”

“I don’t normally drink, but I don’t really like flying either, something about being in a flying coffin. Please pick something good, I’d be clueless.”

“Two double Scotch on the rocks, and a coke please,” James tells the flight attendant. “Oh, and a blanket please.”

“You do seem to have a fondness for that particular drink.” Q shrugged. “Never really tried it, last time I really drank your friends were shoving drinks down my throat, illegally I might add. One was rocket fuel I’m sure. I’ve breathed rocket fuel before, they both have about the same effect.”

“Let it sit for a few minutes, and then sip it slowly,” James smiled. “It will be strong, but it warms you up, let’s you unwind.”

“I’ll take you’re word for it.” Q sighed, looking at the drink curiously, but not touching it, as suggested. “I never really wanted to test the unwinding thing. Aunt Harry rather tested that one first, but I suppose that was because she didn’t know when to stop unwinding.”

“Who is Aunt Harry?” James asked. “Should I expect a visit from her as well?”

“I’ve met her twice, don’t expect to meet her.”

“Ah, ok,” James sipped his scotch. “Not bad, for an airline.”

“Don’t ruin it I wouldn’t be able to tell the difference between good and bad and you’ve spoiled that it’s only mediocre. Now I’ll be searching for why.” Q chuckled, taking the very smallest of sips.

“That’s the only mediocre thing you’ll be having this weekend,” James weaves their fingers together, trying to relieve the tension of Q gripping the seat rest.

Q looked down and noticed the way his hand gripped the chair and tried to loosen his grip with a little success. “Silly isn’t it? I do so many things. Been shot at and had bombs dropped in my lap, but I’m worried about planes even though I know statistically it’s not likely that anything bad will happen. I always thought it was silly, just couldn’t ever stop it. One thing logic can’t always beat.”

“Can I take your mind off of it?” James leans in and kisses a line down his cheek softly, ending with a sweet capture of his bottom lip between teeth.

“If anyone could do it…”

James smiles and wraps the blanket around them both. As the seatbelt sign goes off, he pushes up the seat rest and pulls Q’s legs across his lap. He runs his fingers below the hem of his shirt, warm against his frightened skin.

Q curled closer, resting his head against James and closing his eyes letting go of a breath he hadn’t thought he was holding. He tried not to think about the metal cage around him. He tried not to think about the space below him or the exact velocity that they would hit the earth if something happened. He tried to think only of the arms around him, the warmth.

“Do you like to dance?”James’ voice was muffled in his hair. “There are some places to go and hear live music.”

“Yeah, my dad taught me how to dance. I always liked it.”

“Let’s see if the people at the hotel can recommend somewhere local,” James suggested. “I think I can speak enough French to get us in and be polite.”

“You, polite? I’ll believe it when I see it.” Q chuckled teasingly into James’ chest.

“Me?” James laughed. “Haven’t I been polite? I opened the door, carried your bag, and ordered you a drink. I’m really trying.”

“Polite to me, yes. Polite to others...depends on the day and if they’re after you or not. Plus you’re definitely not polite to the goodies I send out with you. They never come back.”

“But I did promise your Papa to bring you back safely,  and your uncle,” James frowned. “I don’t think I want to know what would happen if I didn’t.”

“You really don’t. I’ve seen what happens. Ever notice when some countries cease to exist or are so ruined that they can’t be really considered countries? That’s my family, they do worse to individuals though. Don’t worry, I won’t let them get you. I have a way with them.”

“I’ll try to remember that,” James kisses him again. “They did give me permission to take you to Paris, although I’m sure we have an armed guard no matter what your uncle told me.”

“He’ll be three hours behind. I happened to ‘fill’ all of the seats and I grounded all the private flights. My uncle really should get used to not messing with me. I have my ways. It was just my little warning to stay back. He doesn’t want a repeat of the last time we got into an argument.”

“I’m trying to do this right,” James took his hand. “I really do want it to work. I know your family means the world to you, and I don’t want you to push them away, in case something happens to me and you need them.”

“You’re doing fine. They like you even if they don’t admit it. We fight all the time really. You should see it when it’s game night. All the talk about...well, everything. And apparently Mr. Body did it himself, though I’m really not sure the game actually works like that.”

“Cluedo?” James laughed. “I’m pretty sure it's never suicide in Cluedo.”

“Tell my dad that. Knives were thrown over it once. That was a rough night.”

“Ok, note to skip game night. What do you think of the Scotch?”

“It’s smooth. Different.” Q sighed taking another sip and leaning back against James, nuzzling closer and relaxing. The plane around him almost forgotten, just a little hum in the back of his head.

“Did you want another?”

“This one’s fine.”

“Will you give me another chance?” James asked softly.

“What do you mean?” Q asked, looking up at him.

“Another chance in bed?”

“If you’re up for it.”

“I want to be,” he felt shy suddenly. He has seduced his way around the world, and a young man he has feelings for has him tongue tied. “I don’t know what will happen though, if I will panic again.”

“Stay with me this time, the real me. The one in that moment with you, not the one in the past. It might help.”

“I’ll do my best,” he promised.

“The best is all anyone can offer.” Q pressed a kiss against James’ jaw, resting his forehead against James’ neck, closing his eyes contentedly.

“I like being able to hold you,” James admitted. “I’m gone far too much, and this kind of time is hard to find. I’m enjoying it.”

“Oh, trust me, I know. There been weeks where I forget what my home looks like, thank heavens I don’t keep any plants.” Q sighed. “This is absolutely lovely.” Q smiled against James. “It’s lovely when the world lets us spend time together.”

He loved his job, but even he had to admit he didn’t love the hours as much as he loved his job. He liked keeping his agents safe and working with new toys, but there were times where he didn’t go home for too long. Occasionally he’d even decide against going back home, in favor of sleeping in his office, but usually he only did that when James was on mission. Sometimes he’d get most of the way home and then get called back in. James had made him go home more often. Knowing that someone was home, home and waiting for him made him delegate more, even though he didn’t like having other people take over when it came to the safety of his agents. He’d learned his boundaries, the point where he could allow someone else to look after his agents and the line where he wouldn’t let anyone else be there for them. Immodest or not, he knew he was the best and when his agents needed life or death help, he wouldn’t let them have anyone but the best at their side. Q was just glad that James understood that.

As much as he loved his job, Q was sure he loved this more, being able to lean against James. Feeling his hand on his back, idly tracing patterns on his spine. It was warm and safe and comforting. Absolutely lovely. Q didn’t have another place he’d rather be when he finally got time off.

“This is nice for me, usually on my downtime all I do is drink,” James admitted. “I’ve never had someone to come home to. Usually I just try to make the time disappear until I have to report in again. Sometimes even I don’t know where I have been.” He kept Hamish wrapped in his arms. “This weekend is the first time I have been on vacation with someone that didn’t involve work, I think ever. At least since I was a child.”

“This is the first time I’ve ever left home without intentionally heading towards some sort of threat. As hard as my Papa tried to get us  to go on nice holidays, Dad would always have a case set up. We’d no sooner get into our hotel room and he’d toss me a phone or a laptop or a disguise and send me off to do something or hand me a gun and tell me to jump off the balcony if necessary.” Q chuckled and shook his head. “It must be sort of lonely, if drinking was really your only friend. You don’t have to do that anymore though, you know that right?”

“Drinking, random women?” James tried to avoid looking down at Q. “Alec and I tend to handle pain the same way, so even if we spent time together after a mission, our pain management was usually the same. I haven’t done that since…” he trailed off in thought. “Since China. I- I have been looking for something more stable, I don’t want to handle us that way.”

“I hate to sound overconfident, though I know that’s usually how I sound anyway...I think this is more stable. Still has its quirks, but definitely more stable.”

“I’m doing my best,” James nodded. “This is the first time I have felt a need to be responsible, its very odd for me. Usually I am like a machine on a mission, and then completely out of control at home. And I find myself craving calm, and ordinary. I wonder what I have been missing.”

“I’ve never known calm. Tell me when you figure out what it’s like.” Q smiled. “I may decide I like it as well.”

“I don’t have any idea,” he admitted. “I just know I want to wake up with you, sober. Wake up excited about down time, spending time with you. Its a scary feeling.”

“I don’t intend to scare you off. Hopefully it’s a good scary rather than a bad.”

“It is, very good,” James mused. “Just unusual. “I never expected to anticipate something as positive, and look forward to it. I have never had someone I wanted to spend time with, and the more I do, the more I want. And I want to spend more time with you. I am more intrigued, instead of bored. I want to know little things, instead of the big picture to capture you.”

“I feel quite the same. The little things... Have you ever wandered into the inside pocket of my jacket? The one I wear to work most days or just whichever one I take really?” Q wondered, thinking of the one thing even his own father hadn’t deduced quite yet.

“No?” James was confused. “Why would I? You haven’t done anything to make me suspicious that I would start searching your clothes. I have tried to be very respectful and think f what boundaries would be in a normal relationship.”

“Thank you for that too. My family is a bit invasive. I am very good at lying and often do about my stress levels, pride and all of that… I carry cigarettes in the inside pocket of my jacket. I’ve had the same box for over a year now. There are seven in it right now. I never talk about the stress of the job, not when it’s really getting to me, I usually just go quiet...but if you check my pocket you can always tell when I’m lying, because I don’t smoke unless I am under more stress than I care to handle. No one notices because no one keeps count. They may know I have them on me but have no clue what they mean.”

“I won’t look,” James told him, serious. “If you want to tell me that you haven’t needed one though, I will be here to listen. Or if you need one, you can unwind and talk to me. I’m not just here to unload on you.”

“Thank you. I wouldn’t care if you looked, as I said, I don’t talk about the things at work, not like I should. Psych hates me for it most days. I end up talking them into knots and having them say things that they shouldn’t. I once had an hour session with one and turned it so completely upside-down that they were talking to me about how they felt. Double-os aren’t the only ones who get on their nerves. I find that I don’t talk as much as I should when it really matters. I’ll remember your offer for next time.”

“Well we don’t like them because they send us out to be unfeeling killers, and then ask how we feel,” James laughed. “They want one thing when we leave , and another when we come back. It doesn’t work in my head when I get two different requests from the same source, and they contradict each other. It makes me feel like I am crazy after awhile, and I don’t like that feeling.”

“We’re all a little crazy, I think. Unfortunate, but true.” Q tensed slightly as the plane jerked a bit, curling into James’ side a bit closer. “Yes, we’re all a bit strange.”

“Well of course, they picked us to kill without a conscience. They didn’t choose people who read the paper and watch telly on weekends for that. Now, what do you think you want to do this weekend?”

“I don’t really know. I’ve never been to Paris. I wouldn’t know what to do except for all of the tourist traps that are there and the history and such. I’ve actually only been to France once, but that was on business and I was nearly drowned that time. Didn’t see much or do much. I suspect I should leave it to your judgements, you know more than I do, in many ways.”

“Well, I know that we can start walking in any direction you like, and get lost,” James smiled. “And then we can call a cab to find our way back when we are tired. We can sit in a bakery all afternoon, or read by the bank of the Seine.”

“Never gotten lost before. I memorize things too quickly to get lost. Might be a good exercise to teach me how to stop thinking. I’ve never actually been able to stop.”

“Oh its fun,” James assured. “You just wander around and look at what strikes your interest. There are plenty of things we don’t see at all at home, so I love to try things I never thought of doing.”

“Sounds lovely.” Q agreed. “They’re going to want our seatbelts on soon. I know the average duration of the flight and have a very accurate internal clock. See what I mean? The mind never shuts up. I don’t really want to move though.”

“Well after we land, you don’t have to be out of my arms for the rest of the weekend if you like. And we don’t have to leave the hotel if you don’t want either. Whatever you want to do. You can shut your brain off if you like, and just enjoy.”

“I like that bit about not leaving your arms.” Q sighed before he began to extract himself from James’ lap and arms. He didn’t much care for being out of those arms as the reality that he was still in a plane settled back into his brain. He didn’t want to decide outright, not really. He wanted James to know that he was keeping his mind open, that James wasn’t tied down to anything he wouldn’t be alright with doing. He wanted James to have choices, he was perfectly alright with simply spending the weekend with the man, no matter what it entailed. Q just didn’t want to make the man think he had to do anything, especially if it made him uncomfortable. Q buckled his seatbelt and grabbed his hand, needing the contact on the damn plane.

James wove their fingers together as the pilot came on the overhead system and announced the beginning of their descent into Paris. They broke through the cloud cover to see the sun shining down on the buildings and the river. The Eiffel Tower sparkled in the rays, and Bond enjoyed seeing the look on Q’s face as he caught sight of it. The young man needed more time to enjoy things outside of work, if his delight from the simple sight of the city was any indication.

“It’s weird, seeing a different sky. I’m used to seeing it in cameras, watching you lot all the time. It’s a bit different in person. I don’t travel so much, we really stopped traveling after that one time with the hound. I’ll have to tell you that one some day, it was interesting.”

“Hound?” James tried to figure out what dogs had to do with travel, but decided it must have been something unique to the Holmes family. The plane landed smoothly, without a single bump, on the tarmac. It taxied to the gate, and as soon as the seatbelt sign went off, James got up to hand Q their bags.

Q sighed in relief and stood up, taking the bags and holding them in one hand, taking James’ hand with the other. Q was happy to be back on land and was more than happy to follow James’ lead through the airport. Often Q had trouble getting through the busy crowds, it’s why he hated the tube, very crowded and nearly impossible for him to slip through easily. James had some sort of magic aura that had most people giving him space to walk through the throngs.

800Q8

James managed to carry both their bags and bundle them into a cab to the hotel. They arrived, and checked in, their bags in the room awaiting them when they checked in. James threw the drapes open, and fed Q a cold strawberry from the bowl sitting on ice with the bottle of champagne.

Q stopped chewing the strawberry as he looked out of the window, staring out at the view. There was, of course, a view of the street, but what caught his eye was beyond the buildings, the Eiffel Tower dominating the skyline. The last time he’d seen it it had been on his laptop as he led 002 through the city. It took him a moment to recall how to finish chewing and swallow the sweet fruit. “It’s amazing. Like I said, a whole different sky.”

"It's different everywhere," James wrapped his arms around him after he threw open the balcony doors. "In Asia, it’s a whole different color sunset. And the blue is different in Russia."

“Amazing isn’t it? How we all look up at the same sky and it still manages to look different?” Q smiled and relaxed in James’ arms, slouching a bit more than he normally did, not needing to stay quite so upright around him. “Thank you.”

"So do you want to open the champagne, or go explore?"

“Can always explore tomorrow, can’t we?” Q asked, gently wrapping his fingers around the arms that James had wrapped around his waist and leaning back against his chest as he looked out at Paris. “I mean, would hate to see the strawberries go to waste, they’re very good.”

“I would hate to have to go out, when we have room service and a perfectly nice bed,” James teased with a nip at the back of his neck. His hands went to the cardigan buttons and began to undo them, warm fingers brushing the stomach beneath the thin linen dress shirt. He didn’t ask permission, just moved slowly enough that if Q tensed in his arms, he would notice and stop. Q unconsciously tilted his head to the side, offering up more skin to the agent behind him as he arched into his touch.

James started at the bottom, undoing each button and caressing the smooth skin beneath. He tried to still the trembling of his hands, afraid that he would end up back in the cell in China. So each breath, he focused on the warmth of the sun on their skin, the smell of the sweet strawberries, and Q’s eager whimpers.

“Still with me?” Q asked gently, feeling James’ body stiffen slightly, feeling the tremble in his hands. Q gently threaded his fingers with James’ silent and supporting.

“Yes, sorry,” James shook his head and turned Q in his arms so he could kiss him. “Trying to keep my mind here, its harder than I thought.” He pulled Q tight against him with a hungry kiss.

“You don’t have to be sorry.” Q whispered when he managed to detach their lips. He pressed a gentle kiss to James’ jaw, followed by a light nip. “Just stay with me as best as you can.”

“You’re wonderful, do you know that?” James kissed each of his hands in turn, and finished unbuttoning the shirt. By the time he got to the collar, he was breathing hard. He had lost track of anything else but the feeling of skin under his fingertips, and rolled each of Q’s nipples between his knuckles with a firm pinch.

Q gasped and arched forward against James, wrapping his arms around him tighter in an attempt to bring him closer as he pressed their lips together again. Q was slightly embarrassed at the sounds that were coming out of him. He’d never heard them before and he wasn’t quite sure he was alright with them coming out, especially in the wrong octave. He hoped the kiss would muffle them, it helped that kissing James was an amazing way to mute himself.

“Do you want to come to bed?” James asked, his voice gone husky from the arousal. He moved backward to where he remembered the bed to be, pulling Q along with him. He worked his way down Q’s throat, brushing the tip of his tongue over the pulse points, and adam’s apple.

“Yes,” Q wasn’t sure if he’d been the one to say the word, because it didn’t sound like his voice at all. However, at least count, Q had been sure there were only two people in the room and he was sure he’d moved his lips to say it. He really didn’t think he sounded like himself and he certainly didn’t feel like himself, he was sure his temperature had shot up in a matter of seconds and every inch of his body felt electric, especially where James touched him.

The back of James’ legs hit the bed, and he laid down, pulling Q on top of him. He ran his fingers over the hard nipples, and down over the thin ribs. His hands could almost span Q’s waist, and he pulled Q down against him, hands on his arse. A small nip to Q’s bottom lip, and then James was groaning against his mouth appreciatively, his erection rubbing against the other man’s.

Q froze, goosebumps making the hair on his arms stand on end. This time it was him that started to slip back to China, and he could feel the cold stones under him. James shook him gently, murmuring in his ear to keep him in that room in Paris where the sun was turning golden.

“Q, come back to me, love,” James urged. He wanted Q with him, not drifting back into the painful memories. Neither of them was whole, they were both scarred with shared memories. “Can you look at me?” James stroked his hands down the chest, and slid the shirt off. Q met his eyes hesitantly, and nodded, eyes wide. “Would you undress me?” he asked softly.

Q reached hesitantly for James’ tie, and loosened it. Once he had it loose enough to slip off, he put it around the lamp on the bed side table, and started with the shirt buttons. He tugged loose the shirt tails and sat back, fingers hesitating at James’ belt buckle. He looked up, suddenly shy, looking for reassurance.

James cupped Q’s cheek in his hand and nodded, keeping their eyes locked so Q could see that he was doing okay. He had his other hand under the waistband of Q’s pants, his thumb print brushing over his hip bone. Q blushed, and went for the zipper, his fingers cupping James with a gentle squeeze. His mouth opened in an ‘oh’, and he groaned.

“Condoms and lube are in the bag,” James reminded, tilting his head towards the bags on the bed next to them. “You know how to use them, yeah?”

“I’m not that young!” Q protested with a laugh, and it broke the tension.

“You said you never had,” James reminded. “Just making sure.”

“Hips up,” Q ordered with a growl. He kneeled to give James room, and helped him slip the pants off. He leaned back to appreciate the view, and unconsciously licked his lips. James smirked at his reaction, and winked, breaking Q from his trance.

“Now you,” James told him, undoing his belt with smooth moves. He sat up to shimmy the pants off of Q, running warm fingers down Q’s erection. He rubbed his fingers over the head, smoothing the precum over his hand to use as lube.

Q froze, shoulders gone rigid. His teeth started to chatter and his eyes shut. James could see his lips moving, but no sounds were coming out. The confident young man was gone, replaced by a terrified victim of the hostage situation they had endured.

James sat up immediately and wrapped a blanket around Q. He pulled Q into his arms and rubbed his hands over Q’s shoulders, trying to bring him back into his body.

“Q, I’m here. We’re in Paris, it's not China. Open your eyes and look at me. Come on, I know you can do it. You are here and you are safe.”

He decided to try something different, and lifted the slight man in his arms. He carried him through the open balcony doors, and settled onto the lounge chair with Q on his lap. The last rays of the summer sun hit their skin, and he rubbed his hands down Q’s upper arms, trying to warm the clammy skin. He continued to reassure him, telling him where they were, and what possible things they could do in Paris tomorrow. Finally Q opened his eyes, looking exhausted. He glanced around with wide eyes, and melted against James’ chest with a relieved sigh.

“Hey, you with me?” James brushed his hands through the sweaty curls, and pushed the glasses back up Q’s nose. Q nodded and hid his head against James’ bare chest, and tangled his limbs into the blanket, curling up like a child after a nightmare.

“I thought I was ok,” he whispered. “I was fine, and it was wonderful, and then I was gone. Logically I knew everything was fine, I just lost sight of that for a second and I was gone.”

“I know, it’s alright,” James reassured. “Do you want some tea?”

“Yes? If we don’t have to move.”

“Well I do have to go inside to call room service,” James laughed.

“Never mind then,” Q frowned from the nest of the blanket. James kissed his forehead and pulled him closer. By the time they noticed the sky again, the first stars were coming out.

“Let’s go inside anyway, I don’t want you getting cold,” James suggested. At Q’s nod, he lifted the slight man in his arms and carried him inside. He settled him onto the bed, tucking him into the blankets with only the mop of curls and eyes and nose poking above the duvet. He dialed room service and asked for tea and some soup for them both, and turned on the electric fireplace. He went into the bathroom and found the bathrobes for them both. He filled the tub with warm water and bubbles, and went to find Q.

The curly haired man’s eyes had closed, and his breath was whistling softly, little snores escaping his open lips. James leaned against the doorway and enjoyed the sight, trying to remember the last time he had felt this type of affection and trust for someone. He let that train of thought go after a few minutes with no examples coming to mind, and went to wake Q gently.

“Wake up, sleeping beauty,” James leaned down to kiss him, and Q’s eyes opened slowly. He smiled sleepily up at him. “I thought you might like a bath, and I ordered food and tea.” Q nodded, and shrugged off the blanket, rubbing his eyes. It made James feel something, an ache deep in his chest. He wondered what it would be like to see this every morning, and realized that he had come to depend on that very thing.

James bundled the young man up in the robe and shooed him off to the bathroom. He checked his phone while he waited for room service. When the knock at the door came, he found himself reaching for a non existent shoulder holster, even though he was expecting the bellman. He shook his head with a sigh, and tipped the man more than he had intended, rattled by his own paranoia.

He went into the bathroom, to find Q with his eyes closed, head back against the edge of the tub. When he heard James, his eyes opened and he smiled lazily. James was carrying a mug of tea, and he handed it to Q, still stirring in the sugar.

“You’re going to spoil me,” Q scolded with a contented sigh as he sipped the tea. “Do you want to come in with me?”

“Are you-” James looked hesitant. “You sure? I don’t want to make you uncomfortable if you need space.”

“What I really need is to be held,” Q sat up. “In. No arguing with me.”

James shrugged off the robe and climbed in, settling back against Q. He reached to turn on the warm water again, and splashed at Q playfully. At the wide eyes, James laughed and settled back again, and Q nipped at his ear in retribution. They settled back and let the water grow tepid again. James turned and rubbed Q’s hair dry with one of the towels, Q protested with an indignant squeak, and James kissed his nose before placing his glasses back on.

“I ordered food, if you can eat,” he helped Q out of the tub and wrapped him in a robe. They settled onto the couch and ate the soup that was barely still warm, along with the plate of bread and cheese that had been sent up. By the time Q was settled in his lap, content and full, the sky had grown dark. The only lights in the room were the fire and the reflection of its flames in the mirror.

James pulled a blanket from the back of the couch and tucked it around them both. Q nuzzled into his neck and drifted off into dreams. James soon followed, and slept the best he had in weeks.

At some point in the night, James awoke to Q shifting frantically, trying to fight off a bad dream. He sat up and rubbed Q’s shoulders until he settled, and then carried him to bed. Once he settled Q into his arms, he spooned against him and kissed the back of his neck with a soft whisper that might have been ‘I love you’.

800Q8

Q opened his eyes to the sun shining on the Eiffel Tower, and a warm pair pair of arms around him. He turned around and met the sapphire eyes with a brush of lips against lips. A small sigh, and then his eyes were slipping closed once again, James pulling him as close as he could physically get.

“Will you-” he cleared his throat. “Will you give me another chance in bed? I feel like you planned this all perfectly, and I messed it all up. Give me a line of code and I can save the world, but I’m afraid I’m bollocks at all of this.”

“Of course,” James reassured him. He rolled onto his back and pulled Q on top of him. “You can have all the time you need. We don’t need to have sex today, or this weekend. Whenever we can both make it through it is just fine. We can keep trying as many times as we need.”

Q blushed and hid his head against James’ chest. He stayed there for a few minutes, letting his breathing return to normal, and his heart rate slow. He felt bad enough that he was inexperienced, but there was James, being so patient. And that was exactly what he needed.

He looked up shyly through the fringe of curls, his eyes wide as he tried to keep his focus clear without his glasses. He bent down to peck at James’ lips, and then leaned in for a real kiss. James wrapped him up in warm arms, and pulled him closer. It was a few moments later that he realized how turned on his was, when his hard on brushed James’. He broke the kiss, surprised, and then giggled. He wanted to smack himself at the noise and groaned, his cheeks pinking in embarrassment.

“Good morning,” James teased.

“Morning,” Q reached for the bag with a grin, and handed James a condom with a wink, that sent him into another burst of giggles. “Oh bloody hell, I sound like a fucking girl.”

“You don’t look like one,” James handed him back the condom after a thought. It might be easier on both of them if their roles were reversed and not like the ones they had been forced into. “Why don’t you use this, try being on top?”

“Me? What if I do it wrong?”

“Then we can try it again,” James smiled up at him reassuringly. “I bet they even sell condoms in Paris if we run out. Just go slow and use lube.”

Q nodded nervously, and reached for the lube. He frowned seriously at it, rubbing it over the tips of his fingers to warm it. He knelt back between James’ legs and looked down at him wide eyed, suddenly nervous.

“You’re doing fine, keep looking at me,” James guided his hand until Q’s fingers slid over his skin. Q was hesitant, biting at his bottom lip as he slid a finger into James. He looked back up at James, to reassure himself that those blue eyes were still watching him, and by the time he had three fingers inside him, James was swearing, between groaning out his name.

It wasn’t long, or complicated. Later on James would wish that it had lasted longer, because he wanted something special for Hamish’s first time in a bed with him that had reached a satisfied conclusion. But neither he, nor Hamish, lasted long once the condom was rolled on, and Hamish was inside him. There was a look of shocked wonder on the young man’s face that made James wish he could freeze that expression in his memory, because he was certain that a look like that had never been directed at him before.

The man inside him wasn’t his title any longer, or the scarred youth from the cell in China. This was a man who had everything he wanted at his fingertips, and he was looking at James with adoration, helplessly in love. There wasn’t anything that James could do, in that moment he realized that he had lost the option to go back to his life as he knew it. The world now revolved around the emerald eyed lover who was carefully touching him like he was precious.

“I love you,” James whispered softly, arching up to meet him. He nodded down at James in wide eyed wonder and his mouth opened as he came. James only lasted a few seconds longer before pulling Hamish into his arms and crushing their lips together as he came with a moan. It took a few minutes for them to catch their breath, but when James looked down at him, he was being watched with that look of reverence that gave hope to his frozen heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	32. Antique

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James and Q explore Paris. James buys something that instantly receives a sort-of threat from Mycroft Holmes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Early because I said so. Also, fluffy. There will be action and drama again, but there's been so much that I think we all deserve a break, right?

Antique

 

Q kept his hand tangled with James’ as they walked down the stairs. He sort of wished he didn’t want to see Paris, because he really just wanted to stay curled up with James for forever, no matter how impossible that desire was. They stepped out into the street through an archway and Q glanced at the red flowers that brightened the white building.

 “Right or left, love?” James asked gently. Q looked up at him and blushed before looking away again. James smiled at him. He’d been noticing it all morning. There were three dominate looks he was getting from Q, a happy loving one that most often occurred, a smug sort of smile that only seemed to show up when Q thought James couldn’t see, and blushes. They didn’t quite seem to have a rhyme or reason, they just appeared in turns.

 “Left.”

 “Alright,” James smiled and gently kissed Q’s temple before they started their walk. Q let James lead him, temporarily shutting off his brain in favor of looking around the city. They stopped at a café where Q giddily insisted that he order their breakfast before he ordered pastries and coffee in fluent, flawless French. He nearly looked like he was going to jump out of his skin when the woman behind the counter responded in French with a smile. “You look excited.”

 “I’m fluent in French and have never actually spoken to someone who uses it as a native tongue. It’s exciting, and helps me test just how accurate my French is.”

 “You’re adorable.” James shook his head and kissed Q’s cheek gently. “I’m going to keep you.” James smiled, combing his fingers through Q’s hair.

 “Decided that, have you?”

 “I think I have.” James smiled, lowering his hand and smiling at the younger man.  He didn’t want this to end. He wanted to wake up with Q, go to sleep with Q, stay up all night with Q… He didn’t want to go anywhere else or search for anyone else. He wanted to keep Q forever.

 “Good, but you must realize that someone’s got to keep you too and I’ve decided I want that job…unless you keep losing my equipment, then we may have to have a discussion.” Q teased, pressing a kiss to his jaw before turning to collect the coffees and croissants. He smiled and said goodbye to the woman at the counter before they stepped back outside.

 “Should be a park not too far from here, mind sitting in the grass for breakfast?” James said, taking his cup from Q.

 “Not at all.” Q smiled, still holding the bag and his cup. James wrapped an arm around his waist to make up for the inability to hold hands. Q grinned up at him before they began walking.

 They sat under a tree in a lovely park and ate breakfast, sipping on coffee and sharing looks and kisses. James thought the whole time, thought about the absolute peace that came with Q, the trust he had for the man that he had never felt for anyone before, not even Alec. He loved the man and he knew he could live with the man and he knew all of his worst habits and the quirks and he loved him for it. James knew it wouldn’t be easy, their work and their weekend together had made that quite clear, but it was worth it and James wanted nothing else. He couldn’t believe it himself that he was so ready to settle down with the boffin who was just over eight years younger than him. Love was strange.

“Do you like antiques?”

“I like you.” Q teased with a smirk on his face. James swatted him lightly.

“I mean it.”

“I do too.”

“Hamish…” James warned.

“Yes, I do. Older things have a certain charm to them. Why do you ask?”

“Well,” he said, wrapping his arms around Q. “I thought we could explore some shops and have lunch over by the tower if you’d like.”

“That sounds lovely.”

“Then it’s a plan.” James smiled and kissed his neck gently.

“We can stay like this for a moment. I like being like this too.”  Q sighed, nuzzling into his side.

“Me too, Q. Me too.”

800Q8

“Oh my. James? Do you see this?!” Q asked with wide eyes, rushing forward at the sight of what looked like an electronic graveyard in the middle of a store. The whole store smelt of another decade mixed with old books and mothballs. Q had, of course, managed to find the old technology in the store.

“What is it, honey?”

“What is it? Dear lord did you have no childhood? Atari and look! There’s the is the Sega. I’m in heaven.”

“Q, I’m not that old you realize.”

“Doesn’t mean that they didn’t linger in the household. God they’re beautiful.” Q said, starting to fiddle around with the smorgasbord of old electronics. “The first computer I ever took apart was like this one. And I used some of the parts to make my first laptop. God this is amazing.”

“Mm-hm, whatever you say, darling.”

“He doesn’t appreciate you, baby, don’t let it get to you.” Q actually spoke to the computers.

“I’ll leave you lot alone for a little bit then, shall I?” James chuckled and kissed Q’s cheek before walking away. He checked over his shoulder and saw Q looking at all of the old machines with wonder. James was half afraid he’d start taking them apart in the store. He’d probably get away with it, knowing Q. James went around the corner, back up to the front, looking down at the glass cases. He couldn’t believe he was going to do this...only if he found something right for Q though.

A minute later a ring caught his eye.

It was a gold claddagh ring with four small emeralds along the band. It would look at home on Q’s slender hands without being too flashy. The tiny emeralds reminded James of Q’s eyes. A soft question in French made James look up, then it was repeated in English a second later, as if the person was fully prepared for foreigners. “Can I help you, sir?” James glanced over his shoulder and the older gentleman looked as well.

“My partner’s in this shop. Is there any way I can get that ring without him noticing?” The man smiled and nodded.

“I’m sure we can manage.” He slipped it out and walked James to the register, quickly checking him out without saying another word aloud, just in case.

“Thank you.” James smiled after he ran his card. James knew Q could see the transactions on his work card, he just hoped Q didn’t look at his personal one.

“You’re welcome.” He smiled, handing over the ring in a small bag. James tucked it away carefully. “What brings you to Paris?” He asked casually. And James smiled.

“Holiday, spending time with my man while I can. Time is hard to get off from work.”

“Is he the one running around the electronics?”

“Yeah, he is.”

“You look happy.”

“We are.”

“Glad to see it.” James’ phone went off and he picked it up, looking at it.

_ Bit soon, don’t you think? -MH _

“Jesus, he was right. He really does have eyes everywhere.” James muttered. Before texting back.

Not for now. Someday though.

_ We’ll see. -MH _

James smiled and deleted the texts. He had a feeling that Q had been right about his family. They seemed to like him, grudgingly. James understood, Q was their baby after all. “You should probably get after that young man before he starts taking apart my things. He seems a bit too interested in them.”

“I promise, if he takes them apart he could put it back together again, could probably make them better too. He’s a genius, but I will make sure he isn’t pulling everything apart.” James smiled and thanked the man again.

“Good luck, son.” He smiled before James walked away.

“Hamish, what are you doing?”

“Teaching!” Q called back from around the corner. James stepped around it and saw Q trying to teach a young girl how to play a game that he’d managed to get set up. The mother of the girl looked relieved that the girl was so distracted.

“Teaching or having fun winning?”

“Can’t I do both?” Q smiled over his shoulder. James sighed and shook his head, walking forward and wrapping his arms around the man from behind. “You’re not allowed to distract me.”

“I’m not. I’m just standing here, hugging you.” James smiled, pressing a kiss against Q’s neck. “Nothing wrong with that at all, is there.”

“Stop it.” Q swatted him away lightly. “You’ll make me lose.”

“You could stand to lose every once in a while, it would be humbling.”

“I shall never be made humble.” Q smiled, returning his attention to the game and winning. He smiled at her and gave her a high-five. The girl didn’t even look disappointed that she’d lost, she just looked entirely amused by the game.

“You should have let her win.” James commented, after Q had taken his hand and followed him away from the electronics.

“Heavens no, that doesn’t work. I tried that with Lisa’s children.”

“Whose?”

“She works with my uncle, she looked after me a few times when I was younger, she has kids about ten years younger than me. I’m sort of the unofficial uncle for them. They look up to me in a way. Anyway, you never let them win, not the smart ones, anyway. It’s an insult.” Q shrugged. “So, what did you get up to while I was having fun?”

“Nothing much, the owner of the shop is nice though.”

“Leave it to you to have a chat.” Q chuckled. “You could have been playing games.”

“I would have lost to you.”

“Well, obviously, but games, James, they are fun.”

“We have to work on the humility bit.” James teased, poking Q’s side.

“And I’m the humble one.” Q sighed as they stepped back out onto the street. “This place has a charm to it.”

“You think so?”

“Yeah, I like it.”

“We can come back sometime, if you like.” James promised, pressing a kiss to his temple.

“That sounds nice. What would you like for lunch?”

“Dear lord, you were a bottomless pit before, and then I let you burn off a few calories,” Q turned bright red, all the way to his ears, “and there’s no stopping you is there?” James teased.

“Sorry. In my defense though, we also walked across a portion of Paris.”

“You’re quite adorable when you’re embarrassed. Red and adorable.”

“I’m new to all of this. Poke fun while you can, one day I won’t turn red so easily.”

“I really hope not. It’s far too much fun.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	33. Dinner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys eat dinner and discuss the past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More fluff for you. :)

Dinner

 

James finished getting dressed and looked down at the clothes. He wouldn’t have picked it for himself and he had decided against the jacket, but Q had obviously picked it out for a reason. “You know the navy is my favorite.”

“Yes, because you can hide your gun in it easier. That and you’ve had it mended three times, obviously your favorite.”  Q called from the bathroom.

“Why this then?”

“Brings out your eyes, and the black looks good on you.” Q sighed stepping out, looking down at his tie before looking up at James and smiling, looking the man up and down appreciatively. “It’s my favorite...aside from that one coat you wear everywhere, the black one. Though...on second thought the clothes may look better on the ground.”

“That was horrible, Q.”

“I learned it from you double-os you are terrible influences. The one-liners alone. Do you know how many I have to listen to? And all of you think you’re so clever.”

“I can’t speak for the others, but I am clever.” James said, stepping forward and beginning to do Q’s tie for him.

“Could stay here…” Q licked his lips as James tightened his tie.

“But you look amazing and I pulled strings and I promised to treat you. Pulling out the chair and holding doors and everything. I can’t go back on that now, I’m a man of my word.”

“‘Of course I’ll bring the tech back, Q, not to worry.’” Q mimicked. “Yes, a man of your word. I’m completely convinced, but the people who cut funding to Q-branch aren’t, you may want to work on that a bit.”

“Maybe you should learn to recognize tones better. I obviously said that sarcastically.”

“Every time? No, I specifically remember a time when I asked you, nicely, to bring things home and you promised you would and all I got back were two pieces of metal that you weren’t sure were actually part of your gun to begin with. So you don’t have to be a man of your word, because you aren’t always.”

“A good argument, but we’re going. I know you don’t have the same enthusiasm I do for such things, but I don’t think there is anything wrong with being spoiled from time to time and you deserve it. So I’m going to spoil you.”

“Alright. I can handle that.”

“Are you sure?”

“I can handle anything, it’s literally in my job description to handle everything.”

800Q8

True to his word James held the door open for Q, and if that hadn’t already had Q tinged pink, James then pulled out his chair at the table. “You’re ridiculous.” Q muttered under his breath.

“And yet you’re here with me.”

“I wasn’t going to get into my decision making skills, I was perfectly content resting the blame on you.” They shared a smile as James sat down across from him. Q tentatively stretched his hand across the table and James threaded their fingers together across the white space between them. “They do tea pairings instead of wine?” Q realized with wide eyes.

“They do both, but I thought you’d appreciate the tea. It’s the main reason why I choose here. I thought it would be your cup of tea.”

“Okay, I’m not so excited about this that I can completely ignore that. That was pathetic.”

“But you’re excited.”

“Of course I am excited, but that doesn’t change the fact that you are...I don’t actually have a word that describes you completely. Idiotic just doesn’t cover it.”

“Surely you have a broader vocabulary than that.”

“I’m too stunned to flip through my internal dictionary.”

“I’m sure that’s it.” James smiled gently.

They both ordered the four course meal Q got the tea, James opted for the wine pairings. The two ate and talked lightly. Q absolutely loved the food, with his uncle around he had had plenty of fancy meals in his life, but he genuinely adored the strange but perfect melding of French and Chinese flavors. They spoke about little things, sharing smiles and laughs at the stories.

“The one time I had a proper vacation Uncle Greg took me. We spent a day by the ocean, swimming and climbing the rocks.”

“You must really get along with him.”

“He’s normal. I can be around him without worrying about being analyzed out of my mind. We don’t argue or try to outwit each other. I love my family, but sometimes it’s a bit stressing being around them for a length of time. As strange as I am, I’m about as normal as they get.” Q smiled taking a sip of his tea.

“My last real vacation was with my parents. It got cut short because I thought I was clever and I ended up breaking my arm.”

“Why am I not surprised?” Q chuckled, taking another bite of his dessert savoring the raspberries.

“I’ve always been a bit of a trouble maker.” James smiled. Q smiled back at him, he’d never heard James talk about his family willingly before, and never so lightly. He didn’t mention it, he knew James would likely just cage back up, so he let it go by. “Was it worth it?”

“It is delicious.” Q nodded taking another bite, sadly the last his plate had to offer. “I’ll admit that it was worth it.”

“I thought so.” James smiled taking his hand again.

“The tea was divine too.”

“I’m glad you liked it.”

James paid for the meal and led them out, hailing a cab to take them back to the hotel and opening the door for Q. Q smiled at him before settling in. James sat next to him and Q curled against his side, pressing a kiss to his neck before resting his head over James’ chest. “Thank you.” James wrapped an arm around Q’s shoulders, holding him close.

“You’re welcome.” James kissed the top of his curls gently, knowing he wasn’t just thanking him for the meal.

They had both needed the time away. Away from work and real responsibility. They needed time to be together and time to try to work through their broken pasts. They both knew there weren’t healed. They were different from most people in that they had a lot more experience with healing, given their jobs, but they still needed time, time to ease into certain things. James knew he likely wouldn’t be able top Q for a while, perhaps a very long while and Q knew he likely wouldn’t want that for a while. They were alright with it. They were taking steps towards beating the memories in their minds.

“James?” Q whispered.

“Yes?” James felt heat against his neck and could tell that the man was embarrassed by something. “You can tell me, Hamish.”

“Can...could we, er, go to bed tonight?” James smiled, the shy man was back. “And maybe just have a lazy day tomorrow, before we have to fly back? I kind of just want to memorize you and…” Q trailed off his voice unsure. For lack of a better term, Q was adorable. He was usually so sure and confident. He was knowing of everything and understood so much that he had every right to be confident and sure. James had found a place where Q wasn’t confident. James was going to have to help to amend that.  James pulled him closer and pressed a kiss to the top of his head.

“That sounds perfect.” James assured him. “We could spend all of tomorrow naked if you like, curled up in that bed, doing whatever we please.” James smiled. They got out of the cab and Q paid the cabbie before he and James made their way up to their room. Q locked the door behind them and James turned on the lights, dimly, but still on so they weren’t in darkness.

James managed to capture Q’s lips in a sweet, languid kiss. Q smiled into the kiss and allowed James to capture him between his strong form and the door. It wasn’t urgent or needy, it was sweet, gentle, searching, and passionate. Q pulled his lips away and tilted his head back against the door.

“One second.” James hummed in response as he worked Q’s jacket off of his shoulders letting it fall to the ground. He gently began planting kisses against Q’s neck, drawing a shiver out of him before James began to explore more thoroughly, trying to find exactly what made Q do that. Q pulled off his glasses before they made imprints on his and James’ faces, stretching out his fingers to place them on the dresser before returning to pull James’ sweater off. “Glasses,” Q scoffed, “I seriously need to consider contacts.” At least with contacts they wouldn’t get in the way and he’d be able to see clearly. It would be better all the way around, except he hated putting them in. It was something to think about.

James chuckled lightly and returned his lips to Q’s, working his shirt out of his trousers as Q slowly began to loosen his tie. Q slipped James’ tie off and pulled out his shirt before Q felt two thumbs follow his hip bones under his trousers. Q arched into the warm touch and James smiled into their kiss.

“‘S nice, don’t stop,” Q pleaded. “Want you to touch me.” He worked on undressing James while the warm hands caressed his skin.

“Easy, no rush,” James chided him, laying them both out on the bed. “We have all night, and all morning tomorrow. We can have so much sex you’ll lose track, even with that technical brain of yours.” He pushed up his hips so Q could take off his pants, since he was tugging at them impatiently, while worrying at the skin on James’ collarbone with his teeth. “Careful, tiger. You’ll get all worried if you draw blood.”

Q sat back with a flustered sigh, and settled for plucking impatiently at James’ shoes and socks. His age showed in his frown that was almost a pout, his inability to get Bond to speed up to his pace.

“Patience, little one,” James teased him, rolling him over so that Q was on the bottom. “Good things come to those who wait.” He finished unbuttoning Q’s shirt, and took off his trousers and pants as well. He sat up enough to ease off Q’s shoes and socks, and left nothing on but the tie. He leaned down to kiss him, and used the tie to pull Q up to his mouth.

When Q was breathless, he worked down his neck, laving at the blushing skin with a warm tongue. Down to suck a line of bruises down his chest, stopping to press a kiss to each pebbled nipple. He kept his hands on Q’ waist, bathing the soft hairs of his treasure trail with wet lips, while he held him down. He was thrashing underneath the agent, all capabilities of coherent speech gone. By the time James made it to his cock, his was pleading in a language James wasn’t sure he recognized, other than having Slavic roots.

James pressed a soft kiss to the tip, before swirling his tongue around the crown with a gentle sucking movement. Q tasted good, salty, clearly he wouldn't last. The benefit of being young, a bit of steam blown off and he would be good for several more rounds. James made quick work of it, teasing him just to the brink. A brush of tongue on the slit to lap at the precum, and that had Q swearing in… Portuguese? if James wasn’t mistaken.

Then James took him in his mouth, all of him. He nuzzled at the soft curls at the base with his nose as he swallowed around him. Q was long, but his cock was slender enough to swallow and still breathe, even if the taste of him had James panting. He rutted shamelessly against Q’s leg, bringing the Quartermaster’s hands to his hair. He wanted him to lose control, enjoy the pleasure without concern for what experiences his partner had.

Q didn’t last long, and he tried to warn him. But he had passed the point of being capable of coherent speech, no matter what he was pleading in his mind. James teased with the flat of his tongue until Q came with a spurt, and James sighed in contentment as he swallowed the taste of him down.

“Do you think you can be a bit more patient now?” He teased Q as he moved up to kiss him. James’ lips were swollen, and he tasted salty, giving Q a bit of his own flavor.

“Oh,” Q couldn’t open his eyes. “The end of my nose feels numb,” he admitted. “Gimme a minute, yeah?”

“Did I break you, little one?” James laughed, a warm sound that filled his chest with something he didn't want to admit could be called love. “Come on Hamish, not fair, I’m still hard,” he teased. “You shouldn’t keep an old man waiting.”

“Waiting?” Q opened one eye and gaped at him incredulously. “You shouldn’t have broken me! I think my brain is offline.”

“Do I have to do ALL the work?” James poured some lube on his fingers and slicked them over Q’s cock. It didn’t take more than a few strokes to have Q sighing, and rutting into James’ hand as he got hard again. He stretched languidly under James’ touch, his spine arched with a decidedly feline angle as he propped himself up on his elbows. “You can at least stretch me, if you’re going to stay there.”

“What?” Q’s eyes flew open. “Oh god, you’re serious!” He grabbed for the lube, and promptly dropped it, dripping it over his fingers. He laughed helplessly before tackling James and rolling them over, pressing kisses to his neck. “Never boring at least,” he laughed.

“Would you get bored?” James asked, suddenly serious. “If this was permanent?”

“No?” Q looked confused. “I waited for you, even when I didn’t have you. Why?”

“I just wonder,” James mussed his hair and guided Q’s hand down to him. He sighed as Q slid the first finger in. Q lapped at James’ nipple as he ran gentle fingers over his opening, a bite at the second nipple as he sighed into James’ mouth and added another finger and scissored them. By the time he had a third finger in, he had his eyes locked on his partner’s with clear adoration shining.

“Is that enough, can I?” Q asked hesitantly, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. He rolled on the condom, hands trembling from the arousal that was wrenching away his self control.

“Yes, more than enough,” James assured him. “You did perfect, but now, I want you inside me.”

Q’s look was one of sheer delight, and he carefully lined them up. He wasn’t as smooth at it as he would have liked to have been, but the moment he was buried inside, he stopped, his face awash with pure shock. He kept the movements small, and took James’ cock in hand to palm it in time with his thrusts.

James kept his arms around Q’s neck, pulling Q as close to him as he could. Even if Q couldn’t see him without his glasses, James was enjoying the endearing little noises Q made as he was inside him, rolling his hips with a sigh, and then snapping his erection against James’ prostate with a sharp groan. James had already let him come once, but the arousal burned through him, wanting to wrench the orgasm from his lover, rather than experience more pleasure himself.

In the end though, they came at the same time. James expression of sheer pleasure was enough to nudge Q over the edge again, and he came with a cry, leaning down to capture Bond’s mouth. He managed to untangle them just enough to get comfortable, and he felt James bin the condom, before sleep took him. He had the best sleep he had since before China, wrapped in his lover’s arms.

800Q8

The late morning sun was streaming through the drapes by the time Q opened his eyes slowly. James met them with a sunny skied blue sparkle, and a soft kiss.

“Good morning lover, did you sleep well?” Q nodded, and James slipped Q’s glasses on his nose so he could stop straining to see. “I ordered tea, and breakfast. Should be up soon, and we can eat in bed.”

A few minutes of lazy kisses later, they could hear the bell man leave the breakfast tray in the living room of the suite. James went to throw on his abandoned shirt to go get the tray, but stopped at the warm expression gracing Hamish’s face. The sweetness of the utter desire, the delight at being spoiled, was all written clearly. James couldn’t resist scooping him up for a kiss, before feeding him bits of pastry with his fingers.

“You’re going to spoil me rotten!” Hamish protested, a smudge jam on his cheek.

“Only the best for someone as sweet as you,” James bent to lick the jam off, which ended in another round of kisses, and the tea getting cool.

By the time they were sated, Hamish was curled on his chest on the lounge chair outside, the awning protecting them from the sun. They had enough time to enjoy each other before they had to shower and dress to go home. James felt the press of his lover’s fingers on each of his scars. When he paid attention, he realized that the lips moving against his skin were reciting the reports in his file for each wound.

“I love you,” he pulled Q closer to him, and breathed him in. “I really do.”

“I know,” Q’s voice was rough from unshed tears. “I love you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	34. Meet the Parents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James meets John and Sherlock. It goes about as well as you'd expect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again, hope you like this chapter. :D

Q kept calm on the plane, but James could still tell that he was nervous, his body just a little too tense. James grabbed his hand and Q smiled up at him, relaxing slightly. Q was just glad it was a short flight. Long flights typically had him bordering on insane with nervous energy. The last time he’d been on a long flight his dad had drugged him. Papa had not been happy.

The landing was slightly bumpy and James tightened his hand on Q’s, trying to calm him down. “Don’t worry, we’re low now, it’s alright.”

“And I bet you’d jump out and land just fine, but I wouldn’t.”

“Then I’d hold you and you’d be safe.”

“A human parachute technically wouldn’t work so well.” Q commented.

“Actually it did, we’ve landed and you didn’t even notice.”

“Okay, human parachute is a good distraction, but not practical in reality.”

“Agreed. Let’s get home and get you some rest.”

800Q8

“Well, the sun does you some good.” R commented from the doorframe. “How was your weekend?”

“Pleasant.”

“Bravo, you didn’t blush.” R smiled. “You’d better keep that poker face in place because you’ll be asked that more than once and you know it. The minions missed you, but they were glad you got a break finally.”

“I agree with that. I needed a break.”

“So, how was it? Come on, I know that look.”

“Don’t you have your own double-o to fawn over?”

“We don’t do romantic trips. I don’t think he knows how to unless he’s on a mission.” R sighed. “I’m working on it.”

“Continue to do so then and mind your own business.”

“Of course, bof. 009 is in Kenya, the brief is in your e-mail.”

“Thank you, R. Did any work get done on the snipers while I was away?”

“Oh, yeah, we’re moving into testing, 002 volunteered to test them.”

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, Q. Welcome back.”

Q managed to work mostly in peace, only a few minions poking at him throughout the day. One or two of them actually seemed to be making sure Q was alright, but apparently Q passed their tests. Tanner even dropped in to see how Q was, though he wasn’t nearly as pushy as the others. He simply remarked that, somehow, the world hadn’t fallen apart with both him and Tanner and Bond out of the office. Q smiled and raised his mug of tea in toast to the small miracles.

Then there had been a text.

_ I need an email from a Cary Kline’s address if convenient. -SH _

Q smiled and quickly opened it up.

_ And what am I looking for? -HWH _

_ Last sent email timestamp. -SH _

_ 1343 two days ago. -HWH _

_ Cracked it, thank you. -SH _

Q had almost finished typing you’re welcome when another text came through.

_ It’s almost Mrs. Hudson’s birthday. -SH _

_ Yes. I know. -HWH _

_ You said we were to be sane and invite him over. This is me trying to be sane and boring. -SH _

_ I’ll ask, but it depends on if he is on a mission or not. -HWH _

There was no reply and Q sighed, well, that was going to be an awkward day. Q was wondering if he could make James a bulletproof suit...just in case.

800Q8

“Don’t shoot at the door.” Q called as he opened it and hung up his coat. He closed it and turned the alarm on before walking into the living room and sitting down in his armchair.

“You look tired.”

“Ronson got shot at a good fifty times. It was eventful. And, my dad texted me.”

“Oh, what about?”

“Asked me to help him with a case.” Q said, pulling off his shoes.

“And?” Q looked up at him, confused. “I’m a spy, Q, there’s more to that sentence.”

“He asked if you’d be willing to go over to their flat. Mrs. Hudson’s birthday is next weekend and well I think it is your best bet at getting through a meet the family without being shot, because Mrs. Hudson would never stand for it.”

“She’s your landlady right?”

“Yes.”

“If I don’t get shipped across the world I’ll go. But do you think you could make me something bullet proof?”

“I’ll work on it.” Q smiled.

“Were they bad to you?”

“No, just some mild prodding for details, then again, I never left Q-branch. Why?”

“Oh I got about seventeen death threats today if for not getting permission to take you away. I didn’t know how protective your agents are over you, should I be worried?”

“No and I’m sure you could hold your own against them.”

“I would hope so.” James nodded. “What do you want for dinner?”

“Are you cooking?”

“If you’d like.”

“Mexican sounds perfect.”

“You’ve got it.” James smiled and ruffled his hair as he walked by.

800Q8

As it turned out, James was sent on a mission the next week, but he arrived back in England on Friday. He came home covered in blood, his suit torn and three knife wounds on his body. Q stitched the worst one up and cleaned and wrapped all of the others, gently washing off James’ skin with a cloth before helping him into a pair of sweatpants and into bed.

James didn’t say much of anything and Q understood. James didn’t really have to say anything, Q had been on with him every second of the mission. He already knew. James simply wrapped his arms around Q and held him against his chest, clinging as if Q was the only anchor in the world that could hold him and he fell asleep only after Q had.

The next morning Q woke up first, but didn’t leave James’ arms, the instant he tried to they clamped down on him, not uncomfortably, but like a steel cage nonetheless. Q stopped moving and James relaxed next to him again, his eyes slowly opening a moment later. “Hey.”

“Morning.” James responded, his voice lower with sleep.

“What do you want for breakfast?” Q asked gently.

“Don’t we have somewhere to be?”

“You just got back from a mission.” Q didn’t need to comment that it wasn’t a particularly nice one. “We don’t have to go.”

“It’s your family, Q.”

“I’m not going to leave you alone, James.” Q smiled gently, running his fingers through James’ short hair. “I’m staying right here and spoiling you as much as I can, because that’s what you would do for me and also because I said so.”

“We can both go, you know? I’ll be fine, Q.”

“My dad has no restraint he’ll start talking about it, trust me you don’t want to be around him right now.”

“Tell him to have some restraint. Hamish, trust me, I’ve had worse days. I’m sure I can handle going to see your family. Normal might be good.”

“Normal isn’t living in my old home, trust me.” Q sighed. “Alright, but if you ever need to come back home you tell me, alright? No trying to tough anything out. Deal?”

“Deal.” James agreed, ruffling Q’s hair.

“You’re obsession with that is going to make it impossible to ever have semi-neat hair ever again.”

“That is the point, I think.”

“Idiot.” Q rolled his eyes before he got up, pulling out clothes to wear. “I’m guessing you’re putting on your battle armor?”

“Battle armor?”

“You usually put on the navy suit when you’re trying to win people over. I suspect you think it’s very charming.”

“It is charming, though.”

“Just because it works on me doesn’t make it perfectly charming for everyone else.”

“Everything works on you.”

“And nothing works just as well apparently.” Q commented before he turned and threw a shirt at James. “Look at what you’ve done to me! Now I’m doing the stupid one-liners.”

“I think it’s cute.”

“You are a bad influence.” Q huffed.

“You love me anyway.”

“I do...god help me.” Q sighed, getting dressed. James lay in the bed watching him. There was something peaceful about coming home to Q. It was safe. The voice that was in his ear and brought him home, the person who made him happy and made him want to come home, it was always better to have Q around. “Tea or coffee?”

“Coffee, please.”

“See you in a few.” Q smiled and James watched him leave before he got up and began getting around, his ribs twinged a bit where they had been bruised.

800Q8

“Hamish,” Mrs. Hudson got up and walked across the flat to hug Q and kiss his cheeks. “Dear, it’s so good to see you.”

“Happy birthday, Mrs. H.” Q smiled and hugged, her, kissing her cheek. “I hid your present downstairs in the usual place, don’t let them find it.” He whispered into her ear.

“Thank you, deary.” She smiled and patted his back before pulling away. “Now, who is this young man?”

“Mrs. H this is James.”

“This is the James I’ve been hearing so much about?” Mrs. Hudson smiled.

“Nice to meet you, ma’am.” James expected a handshake, but got a hug. He tensed slightly and Q gently ghosted his fingers down his side to calm him down.

“Lovely to meet you, anyone who makes that boy happy is welcome here.” She kissed his cheek gently as she pulled away. “You’re handsome too, that can never go amiss.”

“Mrs. Hudson!”

“Well, darling, he is. Take it as a compliment to your taste.”

“Hello, Hamish.” John hugged Q as Sherlock sat in the corner, looking James up and down.

“Hi, Papa.” Q hugged him back. John pulled away and held out a cordial hand to James, which he took. Thankfully, John didn’t seem to be as tense as Sherlock. Q stepped into the flat and glared at his dad, his eyes narrowing slightly. “Be nice.”

“I am nice.”

“You wouldn’t know nice if it slapped you.” Q sighed. “No deductions, got it?” Sherlock raised his hands in surrender, even if a bit snarky.

“God, I miss you being home.” Mrs. Hudson sighed. “Even John can’t get him to do that.”

“I have a thing or two held over his head. I can let you in on a few secrets and you’ll be able to do just the same.” Q grinned, taking James’ hand.

“Best birthday present ever, deary.” Mrs. Hudson beamed as she sat down. Sherlock glowered at Q.

“That isn’t fair. If you speak those things you lose leverage.”

“Not if they are other things, dad.” Hamish smirked.

“You wouldn’t.”

“I would.”

“This means war, you realize?”

“And who has won the last six times? That’s right. Be afraid, be very afraid.”

“We made a monster, didn’t we?” John asked fondly.

“So it would seem.” Sherlock muttered as Q led James to the sofa and they both sat down in it before Q launched into a light conversation with Mrs. Hudson. Q never let go of James’ hand the whole time.

“Well, dears, thank you for the sweats, but I need to go. My sister’s taking me for lunch today.” She smiled  after a few hours of chatting before moving to hug Hamish. “You be careful now, and visit more often, the calls just aren’t enough all the time, deary.”

“Of course, Mrs. H.” Q smiled, hugging her back.

“Nice to meet you, Mr. Bond. Play nice, you four. Honestly, it’s like looking back into the past with those two.” She nodded to Q and James before leaving the flat. Silence filled the flat.

“Right, that’s how this is going to go.” Q sighed, sliding closer to James.

“How was Paris then? You’ve never been.” John started, kindly, lightly.

“It was charming. That and I got to speak French to someone who was French, so that was nice. The food was divine too.” Q nodded.

“I’ve only been once. It was nice.” John smiled.

“Hamish, I think we should have lunch, don’t you?” Sherlock asked.

“What would you like me to make?”

“Oh, no, I was thinking Angelo’s, I’m sure you could just pop over and bring back food. You know what everyone orders.”

“Funny, no.” Q shook his head.

“Q, it’s fine.”

“James…”

“I mean it, I need to have a chat with them, and knowing your metabolism you are starved right now. You did promise we’d eat there sometime.”

“Okay…” Q stood up and leaned forward to press a kiss to his lips before whispering in his ear. “If you need to leave, go. And if either of them move to the bookshelf take that as your sign to leave.”

“Thank you, Q.” James smiled and kissed his cheek. Q looked at both of his parents in warning before leaving the flat. Sherlock counted to seventeen, then to ten, then listened to the door close. “So I suspect this is about a text I got from Mycroft...or potentially one you got from him.”

“You bought a ring in Paris, presumably an engagement one and presumably after consummating your relationship with my son.”

“True.”

“So you and he did do it finally, though I must thank you on not putting him in a rather uncomfortable position again in your escapades”

“Sherlock! That’s our son, I don’t need the image or the knowledge!”

“What? I’m just saying it was honorable, especially from a man who doesn’t normally bo”

“Okay, you can stop there. Too much detail in the deductions.”

“I was under the impression that we were all adults.”

“I still say it’s our son, adult or not. There’s a line there Sherlock. Bit not good.” The last sentence seemed to get through to Sherlock.

“Anyway, why did you buy that?”

“Why does anyone? I have realized over the past few months that I love him. I wake up every morning hoping that I get to wake up the next morning with him there. I just, don’t want it to end. I hope, someday, I can ask him to marry me and that it won’t end. I wasn’t going to ask until I spoke to you, but I saw that ring and it struck a cord: friendship, love, and loyalty. It’s what we have, that and a lot of trust.”

“You’re an agent. You see a lot of violence and you yourself are violent, how do I know you won’t hurt my son or get yourself killed and leave him alone?”

“I can be violent sometimes. I have nightmares and my reactions aren’t always good to them. But frankly, he keeps me calm. When I get angry and violent it’s not when I’m with him, unless someone’s hurting him. I come home to him and he talks and doesn’t ask questions and he calms me down until I’m not angry anymore.”

“You’re hurt right now, you have several wounds and you are full of anxiety. I saw it when Mrs. Hudson hugged you, you tensed, he touched you and you relaxed. He’s good for you. Sherlock was like that with me. I have my own issues from time to time.” John commented. Sherlock looked at him with raised eyebrows. “What? I can observe too on occasion.”

“I would never hurt him. It hurts me to even think of it.”

“You call him Q. Why? He has a name.”

“He likes Q and for us names are a little bit more intimate. At work I’m Bond or 007. We don’t like to flash about our relationship so I usually only call him Hamish when we’re alone, and not even all the time then. It’s a quirk we both conform to, spies and all that.”

“Do you deserve him?” Sherlock asked.

“No, but I want to, someday.”

“I’d feel better if you weren’t an assassin for your country, but then again, it seems the Holmes boys have a type.” John chuckled. “Lestrade was in the army, I was, and I’m a damn good sniper, so don’t hurt him.”

“I think he’d hurt me more than you, no offense, sir.”

“Valid point.” John shrugged. “I think I’m alright. He’ll deliberate for a while longer. He’s very protective, no matter what he says. But I know my son and he’s happy and frankly Holmes men generally don’t show love to more than one person, ever. So, if he’s picked you there is a reason.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“John’s just fine, we’re all adults. And I’ll be alright, if you ever get around to asking my son. Though, be warned, he’ll probably figure it out beforehand.”

“Thank you, John.”

Sherlock simply stared at James and it would have been unnerving if James hadn’t had Q stare at him similarly before. It was the look Q got when he was trying to read someone, trying to break down everything they were into neat little units. Besides, James was a double-o, he wasn’t allowed to be unnerved by anything.

Lunch was slightly awkward too, because James, John, and Q spoke, but Sherlock just seemed to listen and watch the entire time. Q shot a glare at him several times, but James, nudged his leg every time. The man had a right to look after his son, even if it was bordering on creepy.

John smiled as he led them to the door and Sherlock trailed behind. “It was nice to have a meal with you, Papa. Too bad Dad was absent.” Q commented.

“I’m sure he’ll come around.” John promised, hugging Q and kissing his cheek. “Go on, you.” Q smiled and walked down the stairs, leaving the flat. “Well, good luck with him.” John smiled, shaking James’ hand. “Take care of him for us, won’t you?”

“As best as I can.” John smiled and walked away. Sherlock stepped forward and slowly held out his hand. James took his hand and shook it.

“Don’t hurt him.”

“I won’t.”

“Now, do leave I have a case to solve and all this chit-chat has slowed the progress.” James barely made it onto the stairs before Sherlock closed the door.

“You like him.” John chuckled as he watched Sherlock walk to the door, watching as James took Q’s hand and called a cab.

“He’s passable.”

“He’s not boring.”

“Hamish wouldn’t pick someone who was boring.” Sherlock sighed, closing the drapes. He straightened the chair for the clients and sat down in his.

“You really do have a case on?”

“Yes, I’ve received two calls and no messages, clearly someone trying to be polite and warn me that they’re coming. They should be here in less than ten minutes.”

“Right, I’ll make some tea then.”

800Q8

“I’m sorry about that.” Q sighed when the got into the cab.

“It’s fine. We had a good chat actually.”

“Really?”

“Well I only got threatened a few times and the questioning was mild, so I’ll say it went well. Your papa approves and I think your dad did too. He shook my hand is that a good thing?”

“I’d say so.”

“Then it went fine. I’d like to go home and do absolutely nothing now though.”

“Then that’s what we’ll do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	35. Out of the Fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hamish meant to show up at 221B. Things didn't go as planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brought in a little more Sherlock...because...I said so. Sorry I'm a few days late, forgot to post.

Out of the Fire

Q was walking towards 221B a few months later when someone hit him in the shoulder. “You’re excused.” Q rolled his eyes, only to feel something jab into his neck a second later. Q started to struggle, but three hands came down on him, one covering his mouth. He struggled only for a few seconds more as his limbs became heavy and impossible to move. He wanted to reach his phone, just to hit a single button, but it was already being slipped out of his pocket, the gun hidden in his cardigan also being pulled away from him.

His vision failed him as he felt himself being dragged up off the sidewalk. The last thing he heard was a door slam.

800Q8

“Has Hamish shown up yet?” John asked, stepping out of their room, buttoning up his shirt.

“Hm?” Sherlock looked up at John, scanned him and then looked down. “No, he hasn’t shown up. Late too, he’s never late. In fact, I expected him at least an hour ago.”

“Maybe he forgot something, or got called in, you know how busy he is.”

“He’s never that busy. He’d send a text.”

“I’m sure he’ll be alright, Sherlock.” John sighed. There was a knock on the door. “Maybe that’s him.”

“You see but you don’t observe, Hamish would just walk in.” Sherlock said as John opened the door to James.

“Hello, James. What can I do for you?”

“Do you know where Q is? He said he was coming here tonight, but he usually texts me when he gets places and honestly I just feel like there’s something wrong.”

“See John, at least he’s mildly intelligent.”

“Sherlock?"

“I mean at least he thinks something’s off. I mean Hamish would have been here by now.”

“What is this?” John asked, looking down at his phone. “Sherlock?”

“There has to be something wrong, he’s never late.” Sherlock continued as James grabbed John’s phone.

“Skip code.”

“What?” Sherlock asked turning around.

“Q’s in trouble. We need to get to St James the Less. Do you know the fastest way there? I’ve got a car that turns every light green.” James said, rushing for the door, John and Sherlock racing after him.

800Q8

Q woke to feeling absolutely compressed. His body squashed down by a pile of something that had no consistent form. He hurt and everything was slow and fuzzy, but he could hear people, children and adults. The air was awful, there was barely enough of it and it smelled like gasoline.

Gasoline.

Pile.

Objects.

It was November too wasn’t it?

Fuck.

“Help.” Q tried to call out but his voice barely came out. Even if he manage to be loud enough his voice would have to travel through the debris piled on him and to the chattering crowd that likely wouldn’t listen to the plea of a single person. Q moved his hand hoping to reach his phone. Then he remember it had been taken from him.

Fuck.

Q slowly started to shift, trying to find a way to move the debris and get out, but his body was still weak. “Dammit, no, come on.” Q tried to get his muscles to work for him as he saw orange approaching from above. “No, no, no. Don’t!” His voice didn’t reach the man carrying the fire above him. The fire backed away for a moment and Q thought he’d been heard, but then he smelt more gasoline and the fire was back. Then the fire caught. “No,” Q pulled as hard as he could, trying to get away from the orange, the heat the smoke. He tried to scream, but he hardly had enough breath to make a sound.

Well, at least he’d have the new most creative way to die within MI6.

But fuck it all, James was going to be broken up. Q didn’t want James to be broken up, he didn’t want him to be sad.

“Hamish!”

“James?” Was he hearing voices?

“Hamish!” John was shouting too. And did he hear Sherlock too?

“Help!” He called as loud as he could, choking on the smoke, coughing in protest as he felt something shift against him.

“Hamish!” Four arms grabbed him and pulled him free.

“Hamish…” John sighed in relief. Sherlock stood up and looked around at all of the people. James knelt down and gently touched Q’s face.

“Hey, are you with me? Are you alright?” Q let out a cough and wrapped a hand around one of James’.

“About time you showed up, 007.”

“There you are.” James smiled, squeezing Q’s hand.

“We need to get him some air, need to make sure his lungs are alright too. Come on.” John commented. Sherlock didn't even turn to look at Hamish or help him up as he searchd for the person responsible in the massive crowd. “Sherlock! Your son is hurt.”

“Right, yes.”

800Q8

“Do you know why?” James asked, his arms around Q. Q had actually made it out of the bonfire relatively unscathed. They had put him on oxygen for a short while for the smoke, but the worst he has was a slight burn on his left forearm that didn’t even bother him.

“Likely something my dad’s hip deep in. If they were really after me or you, you would have gotten the text. But Papa got it, which means it’s them.”

“How do they know about you? I thought you were the best kept secret in that family.”

“I am, but that doesn’t mean that I’m invisible. I do look like my dad, maybe an enemy put two and two together. I do visit their flat.”

“I don’t want you hurt.”

“I’m alright.” Q promised, twisting around to bury his face in James chest. “They won’t come after me again. Okay?”

“You’re right. I won’t let them. You’re not traveling by yourself anymore. Not until we find out who did this.”

“James, I’m fine.” Q murmured into his chest. “I’m alright.”

“You could have died and we don’t know who it was or why. I’m not letting you walk around alone, it could get you killed. I’ll drive you to work and back home. I’ll make sure you’re safe.”

“And what if you’re not home?”

“Drive to work, take my car, don’t go walking around the city alone anymore, at least not now, okay? I worry about you.” Q smiled gently and kissed James’ shoulder. He wasn’t going to fight him. He knew James was afraid of losing him, and Q wasn’t going to stop him from trying to protect him.

“Okay.”

“Just okay?”

“Yup, now can you grab my laptop and make me a cup of tea?”

“Can’t you get it yourself?”

“I was in a bonfire, I’m tired.”

“But not too tired to work.” James rolled his eyes, but got up. He returned a few minutes later with tea and Q’s laptop.

“Thank you.” Q sighed, taking a sip of the tea and opening his laptop.

“Sit up.” James insisted before sliding in behind Q, letting the smaller man rest against his chest as he worked. “What are you up to?”

“Facial recognition. I need to know who my kidnappers were.”

“Sounds easy for you.” James commented, kissing the side of his neck.

“It is.” Q sighed as he worked. “Guns for hire, work with anyone, could be anyone, except I can trace them backwards, see the last person they were with…and… Oh…”

“Who’s that?”

“Why would _he_ kidnap me, he doesn’t do that sort of thing? Oh! He knows.” Q said in realization.

“Knows what?”

“He knows I’m a Holmes.”

“Who is he?”

“The most disgusting man I can think of.” Q picked up his phone and called a number. “I need to speak to Mycroft, urgently, this is Q from MI6… No, I don’t care that he’s in a meeting. The ambassador will cave even after this distraction, get me Mycroft or I will make the next four years of your life hell... Thank you.” Q waited a minute.

“ _What is it, Q? I’m busy._ ”

“No, you really aren’t.”

“ _What is it_?”

“Magnussen. It’s Magnussen. He put me in the bonfire. What are you doing that has him down my throat? Actually has him wanting to kill me? He isn’t the killing sort.”

 _“I’ve done nothing. I would never._ ”

“Wait…wait… He knows about me from before I was Q… He sent John a text to come after me. Ooh, it makes sense. He isn’t the sort to kill people, he wouldn’t have let me die. He hurt me to prove to John that I am owned by him, which in turn would make Sherlock his property too…which means he owns you. He’s trying to get to you.”

“ _He’s been trying for some time._ ”

“Dad will play his game, if it means saving me. He’ll sell you to him to save me.”

“ _He likely will._ ”

“What do we do?”

“ _We wait to play our parts_.”

“Of course. We catch Magnussen with anything suspicious and we can finally destroy him. The man deserves to pay for what he does.”

“ _He has you though, you need to be careful. He could get you killed with one phone call._ ”

“He’s never tried to play a game against me. I’d love to see him try. Besides, I happen to have a bodyguard who is quite exceptional at getting out of dangerous situations. I’ll be fine. It’s not me he wants, Mycroft, it’s you. Now, go back and play with that ambassador’s head, why don’t you?”

_“Thank you, Q.”_

“Yes, uncle.” Q hung up and threw his phone down.

“Who is Magnussen?”

“The Blackmailer that puts all others to shame. He owns everyone of importance because he has secrets about them, each and every one of them. Every person he deems important he has studied. He finds what he calls pressure points on everyone. For instance, the list on my dad is long and includes drugs and his old dog and my Papa. Anything he can use to blackmail you into doing what he wants you to do he uses. He knows I am a Holmes, he knows I’m John and Sherlock’s son, he knows that he can control John if he can hurt me. If he owns my papa he owns my dad, if he owns my dad he owns my uncle. He’s a nasty piece of work. I hate him.”

“Have you met him?”

“No…but I’ve seen his work.”

“How does he own you?”

“Murder, technically I did kill a man, several, in fact. That’s not what he really holds on me. He likely knows where I live which is bad enough, but what he really knows is what I do.” Q stated. “He knows I’m Q, likely…which means he can call anyone in the world and I’d have assassins following me for the rest of my life. That’s what he’ll use against my parents. He likely has some sort of safety net, if he dies information gets leaked… He’ll tell my parents that he can have me killed if he doesn’t get what he wants. And my parents will give him whatever he asks for.”

“He won’t be able to touch you.”

“I don’t think he’ll try. Unless he ends up dead.” Q promised. James closed the laptop, placing it on the side table, and wrapped his arms around Q tightly, pulling him closer.

“I won’t let anything happen to you.”

“I know.” Q rested back against him and buried one hand in James’ hair as he wrapped his other around James’ arm. “It’ll be alright, trust me.”

“I’ll make sure it’s alright.” James swore, kissing down the side of Q’s neck. Q sighed and tilted his head, allowing him more area to press kisses to. “I’ll keep you safe, I promise.”

“Well, that’s a role reversal. It’s a surprise that you know how to save anything.” Q teased.

“You brat.” James nipped at the side of Q’s neck.

“Well I do save your” James twisted them both around, pressing Q against the bed.

“What were you saying?”

“That I’ve saved that quite frankly amazing ass many times.” Q smiled up at him.

“It is pretty nice isn’t it?”

“Yes, I think so.” Q pressed a kiss to his lips gently.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	36. All Roses have Thorns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life can't always be perfect and fights inevitably happen between everyone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone fights, so I figured this should happen at least once, right?  
> Also, pay attention everyone. :D

Q tilted his head slightly and his eyes narrowed in confusion. There was the strangest little blip in the system. It wasn’t malignant, at least, it didn’t seem to be, but it was strange. He hadn’t come across anything like it before. Q shrugged and got rid of it before starting to redouble the security, just in case. Before he could finish his work his headset beeped and his computer flashed red, switching over immediately to surveillance over James’ mission.

“This is Q.” Q said, keeping his voice calm. “What’s wrong?”

“ _They might have known I was coming._ ”

“How did they know that?” Q asked, working on getting his eyes on his agent and every person around him as quickly as possible.

“ _I’m guessing it was Sofia.”_

“I warned you about her. I told you she was more clever than she pretended to be and she was obviously lying about the abuse. She wasn’t a victim.”

“ _It doesn’t help now that I’m here. Alarms have sounded and I’m blind. I have six bullets left and I really don’t think that’s enough.”_

“Right, I can see you and you need to follow my instructions exactly, do you hear me?”

“ _Yes, Q_.”

Q began to lead James quickly through the building, avoiding the guards and locking some behind their own doors to slow them down. James was nearly out, nearly capable of escaping when he made a turn opposite of Q’s instructions. “Bond, what in the hell are you doing? There are guards that way. It’s not safe.”

 _“I can gather further intel this way though._ ”

“That is not part of your mission. You are to bring the intel you have back here in one piece, that is the mission.”

_“This could really help though, Q.”_

“Turn around now, 007, we have what we need.” James tracker didn’t show him turning around. “Dammit. Go back, that’s an order.” James’ came to a stop, but didn’t turn back. He was working on something. “I don’t have eyes on you in there. You need to leave.”

 _“Five more seconds, Q._ ”

“You should be out of there by now.”

“ _Don’t worry, I’m fine, just trying to give us more of an advantage._ ”

“007 it...shit! 007 someone’s entering from the north hallway. Get out.” There were gunshots a second later and Q tensed slightly. Then his whole body froze when he heard James make a pained noise. “007? Bond are you alright?”

“ _Shot, nothing vital. Enemies down.”_ His tracker showed him heading in the right direction again.

 _Fuck_. Q thought, swallowing down the anger before he saw James appear on camera again. He was bleeding, one hand pressed to his torso. _Mother fucker_. Q squeezed his eyes shut before he opened them again adding a need for medical on top of the evac team. “I need you to head right, down the stairs and out the door. Then I need you to sprint until you’re to the fence. Do be careful not to trip over the roots of a damn tree, 007.”

“ _The fence is electric._ ”

“Yeah, and I’m a genius who knows how to flip a switch, move your ass.” The anger was a little less than professional and everyone in his branch looked up at him before wincing and looking down at his glare. Q was alright with James getting hurt, it was going to happen, as long as he came home it was fine. But Q could not stand that James had blatantly not done as he was told and gotten hurt for it. Q couldn’t protect the man if he didn’t trust him. Q watched as he approached the fence and shut off the power for it. “Climb over it and do avoid the wire.” James didn’t respond, but Q heard a grunt as James landed on his feet, jumping from the top of the fence. “Three hundred meters to the southwest, a grey car is sitting on the side of the road with emergency signals on, get in.”

“ _Yes, Q_.” James huffed out. Q waited until the evac team had James and watched them pull away. “ _Thank you, Q._ ”

“You will be transferred to R, Q out.” Q pulled his headset off and slammed it down on his desk. R looked at Q with wide eyes, not sure she’d ever seen him so angry before. Q normally said something to James at the end of their conversations, something professional but caring: see you soon, get home safe, good job, anything. Q had practically disowned the man. “I need a break or something or maybe I just need to break something. Technically I was supposed to be home hours ago. Just, send me a text if the bastard bleeds out.” R winced, but nodded as Q grabbed his coat and his bag and vanished.

“You really cocked that up, Bond.” She sighed to him over the comms.

800Q8

By the end of the night, there were only four cigarettes left in the pack that Q kept in his coat. Q sat and stared at his phone that had only one text on it, from R.

_He’s going to be fine._

James had had the sense not to try to talk to him. Or perhaps he was passed out or sedated, either way Q probably would have shot him himself if he’d gotten anything from him. Q left his place on the sofa and headed for their room. He didn’t want to crawl into the bed alone, but he was still far too angry to even be around a place that smelled like James. Q grabbed a clean pillow from the spare room and slept on the couch, holding onto the tags around his throat, entirely angry and sad and scared and betrayed and far too many emotions for him to properly understand at one time.

Q tossed and turned for hours before he finally fell asleep, but the sofa had nothing to do with his discomfort.

800Q8

James spent two days in medical, mostly because he was pumped full of drugs and because the doctors wanted to make sure that most of the damage had been looked after before James decided he wasn’t going to sit still anymore.

Q hadn’t been in to visit him. James hadn’t seen or heard from the man once. It stung, but in a way, he sort of understood. He just hoped that the anger wasn’t going to linger. He didn’t want the man to leave, especially when James could have just listened to the man and done his mission as ordered.

James really needed to get home. He wanted to be with Q, wanted to try to fix what he knew he’d fucked up. So he left medical before they cleared him, but he was sure no one was actually surprised.

James arrived back at the house and found Q sitting on the chair, staring down at a book. It sort of stung, seeing him look so casual even as he stood in the entrance to the living room, a bullet wound in his abdomen. “Q?” James asked gently, staying in the doorway. Q didn’t look up, but he blinked, which James was sure was probably more than he deserved. James was tempted to ask for Q again, but he thought better of it. Q turned the page of his book and James flinched. Q took a deep breath a moment later before he placed a bookmark in the book and looked up at James.

“You’re out of medical early. Did you disregard them as they tried to keep you safe too?” It was delivered coldly and detached without any anger, but James winced anyway.

“Q, I’m… I’m sorry. I know I worried you.” Q raised his eyebrows and stood up, folding his arms over his chest.

“Would you like to try that again? But make it good because that wasn’t nearly good enough.”

“I’m sorry, I am so sorry. I shouldn’t have caused that worry.”

“Do I LOOK like I’m WORRIED?” Q demanded, anger finally in his voice.

“Um...I don’t understand.”

“No, of course you don’t.” Q growled, rolling his eyes. “You could always start with: sorry for betraying you, sorry for not trusting you, sorry for making you obsolete, sorry for not letting you protect me, sorry for nearly getting myself killed, sorry for disregarding an order, sorry for making you think I was going to die without letting you do anything to help me. MAYBE you could start with one of those before you start talking about being sorry for worrying me. Worry is the last fucking thing on my mind right now. Anger, betrayal, lack of trust, now those are things that I’m thinking of.”

“I was just trying to do my job.”

“NO! You weren’t. Your job was done! It was time for me to do my job and then you decided to go off mission after I ordered you several times not to.”

“I’m sorry, I thought”

“No, you didn’t. You didn’t think. I told you she was a damn mole. I told you she was lying to you and you went and prattled on anyway. Do you not fucking trust me? Do you hold me in such little regard that you don’t even think to consider my judgement? Do you like betraying me and going off on your own? Do you think it’s fun to go off and get your adrenaline kick while I have to sit back and let go of all control I have over a situation?” Q was shouting, his face livid and red with anger.

James hadn’t seen it that way. He’d just wanted to try to get more for England, to get a few more points for the good guys. He hadn’t thought it would hurt Q so much. “I didn’t know. I didn’t think.”

“It makes me wonder what you do think when you are thinking. It makes me wonder if you actually do trust me to look after you. If you can’t fucking trust me to look after you in the field how in the hell am I supposed to believe that you trust me personally? How am I supposed to keep living every day thinking that you don’t trust me or that you’ll turn your back on me or that you’ll do everything in your power to make me as fucking obsolete in your life as possible? It makes me think I can’t be your fucking handler anymore if you don’t fucking trust me and I certainly don’t think I can do this,” he waved a hand between them, “if you don’t fucking put a little faith in me.”

Something broke in James. Q couldn’t leave, could he? James hadn’t meant any of that, hadn’t meant to make Q feel like he didn’t trust him.  He hadn’t meant for Q to hurt at all. He never meant that. “Hamish…”

“Don’t, don’t you fucking dare.” Q shook his head, tears in his eyes as he brushed past James and pulled his coat off of the hook. “Just don’t fucking bleed out on anything, it’s difficult to clean up.” Q didn’t even put on his coat before he stepped outside and slammed the door behind him, his jacket in hand.

James couldn’t even turn to look at the door. He was frozen in place. His life had just walked out of the door and slammed it.

800Q8

James sat in Q’s armchair and stared off into the distance, not knowing quite what to do. He wished he could curl up into a ball, but frankly his wound wasn’t going to let him curl up like that. Sure, he’d gotten a little bit of extra information for his country, but he may have just lost Q. The scales weren’t balanced, and the ring that James always kept on him was heavier than anything he’d ever carried.

It was nearly eleven when the door opened. James held his breath as he listened to the code get punched in and heard Q slowly walk down the hallway. “James?” Q called out quietly. James slowly looked up at Q and let out his breath. At least Q was talking to him and looking at him, definitely a step up.

“Q?”

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have… I was scared and I shouldn’t have acted like that. I was just so afraid to lose you. Do you know what that would do to me? To be the one who couldn’t bring you home? To be the one who was supposed to save you and couldn’t? Losing you would be hard enough because you mean so damn much, but that…” Q’s voice broke and he covered his trembling lips with his hand as tears rolled down his cheeks. “I can’t. I can’t do that, James. I’m sorry for what I said, but I don’t make me go through that again, please.”

James got up and crossed the room, pulling Q into a hug. “I’m sorry too. I didn’t realize how it would make you feel. I wasn’t thinking and I should never have stopped listening to you. I do trust you, Hamish, with everything and I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” James pressed a kiss to Q’s head. Q pressed closer, gripping James’ shirt tightly.

“I’m still fucking pissed off at you. But that’s a start. I’m just glad you’re home. I’m glad you’re safe. I’ve never been so scared. Not anything has compared to that fear. I was so afraid you were going to leave me and it was going to be my fault.”

“I’ll never put you through that again. I promise I’ll listen to you, okay? I promise.”

“Just don’t leave me and we’ll be okay. We’ll be fine.” Q said, sobbing into James’ shirt.

“We will be, won’t we? We’ll be perfect.” James agreed, gently pressing another kiss to Q’s head.

“Shit, you’re hurt and I’m clinging to you. Do your bandages need to be changed? I can do that. You shouldn’t be on your feet, you should be in bed.”

“Well, I wouldn’t complain if you were in bed with me.” James teased, trying to make Q smile.

“You idiot...my idiot.” Q sighed and shook his head, wiping his tears away. “Come on, we’ll get that bandage changed and then we can go to bed, okay?”

“Does that include make-up sex?” James asked cheekily. But Q could see through it, the great James Bond had the gloss of tears in his eyes and red rims around his eyes.

“If you’re up for it old man, but I need to make sure your bandages are clean and then you can be horizontal all you like.” Q kissed his cheek gently before leading him up the stairs and into the bathroom, pulling the first aid kit free and taking off his jacket. James sighed in relief, seeing the jacket laying on the floor. Q slowly and tenderly undressed James’ upper half before undoing the bandages. “Well, at least they did a good job stitching you up this time.” Q smiled faintly before starting to re-wrap it. James gently brushed the remainder of tears off of Q’s face before pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead.

“I’m sorry.”

“We’re okay. Alright? I mean it. I’ll be a bit angry maybe for a while, but...we’re okay. Let’s just try to move on, okay? I’ll try too.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” Q smiled and pressed a sweet kiss to James’ lips as he finished bandaging him. “Come on, old man. The bedroom calls and you definitely shouldn’t be on your feet.” Q sighed, pulling the man to their room and helping James strip down to his pants because James couldn’t quite bend over far enough to get his shoes and socks off.

Q stripped himself down to his pants and the tags around his throat before he grabbed one of James’ shirts and pulled it on over his head. He crawled into bed and hovered over James for a moment, a look of worry and gratitude and love on his face before he leaned down and pressed a loving, sweet kiss to James’ lips. He found comfort in the warmth and the taste and the smell of the man. Q pressed their foreheads together and opened his eyes, thankfully able to make out the blue eyes below him. He pressed one last kiss to his lips before curling up against James’ side, resting his head on his shoulder and wrapping his arms around him, not giving a damn if they fell asleep at any point during the night.

“Stay with me.”

“Always, Hamish.” James promised before they both fell asleep, curled together.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	37. A Very Holmes-y Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sherlock meets with the devil. The devil threatens the one thing that ties both John and Sherlock's hands completely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of posts today...

A Very Holmes-y Christmas

 

Q and James were both going to be home for Christmas. R offered to cover, since 006 was on a mission and James wasn’t cleared for field work quite yet, as his torso was still tender and him running around was only going to make it worse. Q still wasn’t happy that he’d been shot, but he was happy that they would get to spend their first Christmas together.

There was a tree in their front room, decorated in blue lights because Q wanted white and James wanted color. They hadn’t fought about it, because Q was very calm about it. Blue was colorful, but also a solid color, rather than several. James got color Q got less gaudy lights. They both liked them, so they agreed it was a fair compromise. There were few decorations on the tree, a few that Q had owned from Mrs. Hudson and from childhood gifts, and many he 3D printed, including a gun, J, B, H, and Q scrabble tiles,snowflakes, and a mug. Someone had let James get ahold of the damn printer and he had printed a pen and decided it would top their tree, just to help inspire Q.

Q nearly took it down, but he left it because it made James smile. There were only a handful of gifts under the tree, because they had both agreed to keep it simple, but they were neatly wrapped and carefully placed. Q had wrapped all of them after James had put all of the gifts to Q in nondescript boxes. Q liked gifts wrapped symmetrically and James had thought it wise not to judge. James had to admit it was cool that the pattern continued without a single break across every gift, he just didn’t see the point, especially since Q said he didn’t keep the paper, again, James didn’t judge, everyone had quirks.

They snuggled on the couch, drinking hot chocolate and watching Christmas movies, James spooning Q. Q’s phone vibrated and James glanced at it. “Text from your uncle.”

“Which one?”

“Mycroft.”

“Can’t reach it, tell me what it says.” James raised an eyebrow at Q. “I’m not an idiot, I know you have spied on me for the password, I can tell when you hover. Besides, for you it would easy to guess. My dad can’t which pisses him off, but frankly you know me better.”

“It’s a picture of presents under a tree.”

“Helpful. Details. If he sent a picture it means there’s a message in it.”

“The lights are white and there’s an angel on top, feather wings, gold and white dress. Some of the gifts look like you could have wrapped them.” James stated. “Silver and blue stripes.”

“That’s because I wrapped them. He’s trying to be clever.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean he’s telling me that we’re going to Grandmummy and Grandpa’s house tomorrow for Christmas.”

“I thought you told them we were staying home this year.”

“I did. Situation has changed, question is: why?” Q grabbed his phone and sent a picture back of his tree, his and James’ sock covered feet were at the bottom of the picture. Five seconds later three letters came back in reply along with a picture of a laptop.

_CAM_

“Right, it appears we have to go. I’m sorry.”

“What’s wrong?"

“My father’s likely going to do something stupid tomorrow, it’s best to have all hands on deck. One day I’d like to have a normal, relaxed Christmas.” Q dropped his phone on the ground next to his mug and rolled over, curling up against James’ chest. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright.”

“I know you wanted to stay home and I did too and...I wish my family didn’t get into these problems so often, but they always do, especially around Christmas.”

“It’s alright.” James promised, kissing the top of his head.

“Maybe next year.”

“Or this year.”

“What?”

“Would you object to having Christmas a day early?”

“No.”

“Then we can have a proper Christmas.”

“Thank you. But I’ll warn you, if you got me anything nice to wear I won’t wear it tomorrow, it’ll likely end up covered in blood or acid.”

“I won’t be offended.”

“Okay.” Q smiled and got up, grabbing the presents.

800Q8

The first fifteen minutes had been a little rough. Grandma Holmes had instantly hugged James, kissed his cheeks and welcomed him to the family, her husband shook James’ hand and apologized for the enthusiasm, noticing James’ discomfort as the woman practically tackled Q. James was just glad he had escaped that particular assault. Mycroft walked in with a man a few moments later.

“Uncle Greg!” Q beamed and hugged the man.

“Yes, of course run to him.” Mycroft sighed.

“Hey, kiddo, long time no see.” They shared a brief hug. “How have you and your man been? Sorry we haven’t gotten around, just the three of us. You know he’d probably appreciate meeting the sane side of the family.”

“He would, we’ll think of something.” Q smiled.

“Should I bother with sending my schedule?”

“No.” Q smiled and Greg chuckled.

“Hello, James, right?”

“Yes, sir.” James shook the man’s hand.

“Greg or Lestrade is fine, not Gary.”

“Alright, Greg, not Gary.”

“Sherlock forgets my name.”

“You two have an argument?” Mycroft asked.

“Uncle, we’re fine.”

“I can see that, but there’s a thing in”

“Mycroft, it’s Christmas and none of your business.” Greg warned him and Mycroft actually backed off. Five minutes later Sherlock, John, and a homeless man arrived. Sherlock took one look at the pair of them.

“First spat then? Better not repeat that mistake again, Bond, he’s big on trust, as are you, you should sympathize.”

“Dad, I will ruin you.” Q warned with a smile on his face.

“Just giving him advice.” Sherlock shrugged.

800Q8

“I like Greg. Your father is less tactful than your uncle.”

“Politician and a detective, it explains it all.”

“Your grandparents seem mostly sane.” James smiled at Q gently. A car had arrived at their house early in the morning and had brought them out to Q’s grandparents’ home. It was cozy and his grandparents were warm, but even James had to admit having Sherlock and Mycroft in the same house for any length of time could prove fatal.

“Seem.” Q smiled, pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek before taking a drink of his tea. “They like you though.”

“I’m glad they do. Did your dad have to bring a homeless man though? What is he up to?”

“I don’t know what he’s up to, but it isn’t good. He’s up to something, but keeping a remarkable poker face. Likely trying to fool Mycroft.” Q sighed. “Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas.” James smiled taking a drink from his glass before setting it down and wrapping his arms around Q. “It’s been a long time since I had a Christmas.”

“Enjoying it?”

“I always enjoy you being around.”

“You’re too sweet.” Q smiled and pressed a kiss to James’ lips.

“Don’t let that get out.” Q closed his eyes and shook his head. “Q, what’s wrong?”

“My head…” He felt light-headed, like his world was closing in on a point.

“Q, are you alright?”

“Somethin’…” Q’s words slurred and he collapsed into James’ arms.

“Q? Hamish?!” James set him down on the arm chair, kneeling and trying to assess if he was still alive, but he noticed it too, a strange sort of fog clouding everything. He’d been dosed with things before, he knew the feeling. He collapsed forward, his head falling into Q’s lap as he went unconscious.

“Hamish?” John asked worriedly. “Hamish!” He ran across the room to his son.

“Don’t drink his tea. Or anyone’s drink for that matter.” Sherlock said, looking at the way Bond’s body was slouched with disapproval. He nudged the man with his foot so that he fell to the ground before he checked to see that he was breathing.

“God, Sherlock, what have you done?”

“Made a deal with the devil.”

800Q8

“Your son doesn’t exist, not anywhere, but I knew about him before, before he hid himself. I know who he is and his place in MI6, do take care, Mr. Holmes, there are a lot of people who would love to know who your son is, who would love to pay him a visit in the cozy house he has on the other side of the Thames. It’s all quite simple. Mycroft’s pressure point is his junkie detective brother, your pressure point is John, John’s pressure point is dear Hamish. I own him, I own you, I get Mycroft for Christmas. Yes, Q would be more fun, but honestly, he’s just a kid and he’d die if I started playing with him. I’m not a murderer, I’m a businessman. This is what I got for Christmas.” He smiled, picking up Mycroft’s laptop.

“It’s not a gift it’s an exchange.” Sherlock snapped, his jaw tight.

“I’ve already got it though.”

“It’s password protected. In return for the password, you will give me everything you have on my son.”

“Bad kid, should have raised him better. Do you know how many kills he has on his record? Poor child, been tortured too. Spends his days with an assassin. I doubt they sleep together though, I’m sensing some major trauma. Should have taken better care of him.”

“Give us what you have on our son.” Sherlock demanded.

“You know I honestly hoped for something good.”

“Oh I think you’ll find the contents of that laptop”

“Include a GPS locater. By now, your brother and son will have noticed the theft and MI5 and MI6 will be converging on this house. Having arrived they will find top secret information in my hands and have every justification to search my vaults. They will discover further information of this kind and I’ll be imprisoned. You’ll be exonerated and restored to that smelly little apartment to solve crimes with your husband and Hamish will be able to sleep at night. “Mycroft has been looking for this opportunity for a long time. He’ll be a very, very proud big brother.”

“The fact that you know it’s going to happen isn’t going to stop it.”

“Then why am I smiling? Ask me.”

“Why are you smiling?” John demanded, his jaw tightening.

“Because Sherlock Holmes has made one mistake which will destroy the lives of everyone he loves and everything he holds dear.” He smirked. “Let me show you the Appledore vaults…”

800Q8

“James?” Q asked, shaking the man gently. James groaned and blinked his eyes open. “There you are. Hate to do this to you, but we need to go. My dad’s done something incredibly stupid.”

“What is that?”

“Stolen Mycroft’s laptop. I’ve traced him to Magnussen’s house. We need to go.”

“How long have you been up?”

“Two minutes why?”

“You work too hard.”

“Time to go, helicopter’s here.” Mycroft called.

“Mycroft it’s your brother.” Mrs. Holmes protested.

“And he’s just sold his soul to the devil, along with my laptop.”

“It’s treason, we’re going to save him, not hurt him.” Q kissed her cheek as the three of them rushed out of the house.

800Q8

“M I need you to help me on this one.”

 _“I don’t have the evidence, Q. I know what he is, but knowing doesn’t do a damn thing when I have to explain why I allowed someone to be killed._ ”

“M, he’s likely going to end up dead, could I please get an okay?”

“ _I can’t authorize a civilian to_ ”

“Civilian my ass! He’s worked for MI6 more than once.”

“I’ll kill him. He’s threatening you after all.” James commented.

“ _Threatened you?_ ”

“Put me in a fire, did you miss that memo?” Q asked. “I could have died.”

“ _If he gives you a reason to shoot, James has that right. I’ll figure it out_.”

“You got that, James?”

“Of course I do.” James said, gun in hand.

800Q8

“To clarify? Appledore’s vaults only exist in your mind, nowhere else…? Just there?” Sherlock asked.

“They’re not real. They never have been.”

“Sherlock Holmes and John Watson, step away.”

Sherlock looked at Magnussen and then glanced up at the helicopter. Mycroft was there, no doubt James and Q were as well. Q, his son that Magnussen would surely have placed on several hit lists as soon as the government and the police cleared off. Magnussen wouldn’t likely appreciate being so publicly made to look suspicious. “It’s fine, they’re harmless!” The shark called out to everyone.

Sherlock glanced at John and then up at the helicopter one last time. Hamish would fight for him, of course he would, John would be pissed off, of course he would, Mycroft would be upset, of course he would, and James would likely be a bit pissed for making Hamish worry… But it would be better this way. The threat would be gone, Mycroft would attempt to save him and Q would as well, no matter how it finally came down to it Sherlock would rather have Q safe. John would still have his son, Mycroft a nephew, and Q would have James as much as Sherlock grudgingly liked the man (liked in that he wasn’t stupid and treated Q kindly).

“Sherlock, what do we do?” Sherlock heard it faintly.

“Nothing, there’s nothing to be done! Oh, I’m not a villain. I have no evil plan. I’m a businessman, acquiring assets. You and your little family happen to be one of them.” He smirked. “Sorry. No chance for you to be a hero this time, Mr. Holmes.”

“Sherlock Holmes and John Watson, stand away from that man. Do it now.”

“Oh, do your research.” Sherlock rolled his eyes and reached around John to slip his gun out of his pocket. “I’m not a hero…I’m not even a high-functioning sociopath according to my son’s research. But I’ll tell you what I am. I am a man who would do anything for his family. Merry Christmas.” John leapt backwards in shock as Sherlock dropped the gun, as Magnussen hit the ground. “Get away from me, John. Stay back.” Sherlock warned as he raised his hands. John raised his hands and stepped back.

“Christ, Sherlock! Sherlock, what have you done?”

“Do not fire on Sherlock Holmes! Do not fire!”

“Oh, Christ, Sherlock…” John said, tears spilling over his eyes. Sherlock was barely holding his back. Did he regret the murder? No. Did he hate that it would take him from everything he cared about and that it would make them hurt? Yes.

“Hamish is safe now. Keep him out of trouble. I’m sure James will help with that.”

“Jesus, Sherlock…”

800Q8

“What has he done? Dammit, I just needed five more minutes.” Q hissed. “Five fucking minutes. Merry fucking Christmas again!” James gently wrapped an arm around him and pressed a kiss to the side of his head.

“I’m sorry.” James said gently.

“Q, pull yourself together, we’re going to need you on this.”

“I tried uncle, Sherlock didn’t have that right. I can’t swing defense either because Sherlock went after him...with your laptop, how do we explain that to idiots? How do explain the genius in the insanity to people who can’t see it?”

“I can get him out of the death penalty.”

“How?”

“Service to country.”

“Not that mission, Mycroft, no. We wouldn’t send James on that mission, let alone my father. He’ll be dead in six months.”

“So you have six months to make it work. Stop being Hamish and be Q, that’s who we need right now.”

“Yes, sir.” Q said in a firmer voice. James looked between Hamish and Mycroft, feeling like there was an almost cruel air between them. Q was in tears and Mycroft hadn’t allowed any of that. Then James noticed that there were tears on Mycroft’s cheeks as well. It wasn’t as cold as James has thought, it was a way of coping.

“If there’s anything I can do...”

“Thank you.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	38. 006 and 007

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sherlock doesn't have much time....but he does have a genius son who knows so skilled secret agents.

006 and 007

 

“You don’t have to come with me.” Q commented his face pressed against James’ chest.

“I will though, I don’t want you to be alone.” James gently ran his fingers through Q’s hair and Q snuggled closer. James kept one hand in Q’s hair and wrapped the other around Q’s waist, pulling Q on top of him. Q sighed and gently traced idle patterns on James’ skin.

“This isn’t the first time my dad’s gone to his death. You’d think it would get easier.”

“You can bring him home, I know you can. You bring everyone else home.”

“And the pressure of it all is immense. I mean, I worry about the agents all of them, I love them all as brothers or sisters, or a lover, in your case, but I know how each of you will react to any given thing I’ll say to you. My dad, he doesn’t like to be predictable...and I won’t even be able to keep my eyes on him. Then in six months if I fuck this up I am the one who has to tell my papa that I fucked it up.”

“Hamish, nothing that happens is your fault.”

“If you’re going to say that doing my best is all I can do and that it’s enough, don’t. I don’t want to hear it.”

“But it’s true. It’s all you can do, Hamish. And you’re not going to be alone. I’ll help you with whatever you need to bring him back home, okay?”

“I love you.” Q relaxed completely into James’ body.

“I love you too, sweetie.”

“He’ll come home safe.”

“Of course he will, you’ll be there to bring him home. And I’ll dig his ass out of trouble if I have to.”

“Don’t let people think you’re so nice.”

“Why not?”

“Because the line of people who want to murder me and take my place is long enough, thank you.”

“There’s a line?”

“It wraps around the block six times.”

“I’ve never noticed.”

“You must have, you walk through MI6 and everyone watches your ass as you walk by. When you’re scheduled to show up skirts get shorter, trousers get tighter, and shirts are cut lower, even in Q-branch.”

“I don’t notice, I suppose I’m too busy looking at you.” Q pushed himself up on his elbows and looked down at James with wide eyes.

“What?”

“I rather think I like messy hair, glasses, and ugly cardigans that you somehow make look amazing.”

“You’re sweet.”

“Only with you.” James promised, tracing patterns down Q’s back as Q lay back down against him.

“You ever just wish you could stay in one moment so you never have to face the next one?”

“All the time.” James sighed, holding Q tighter when he snuggled closer. “All the time.” Q closed his eyes and relaxed as much as he could.

“I have to get up.”

“Yeah… I’ll be with you the whole time, though, if it helps.”

“It always helps. I’m not used to people being there, I’m usually the one watching over people’s shoulders, not the other way around. I like having you here.” Q smiled and rolled off of James, sitting up and pulling on his glasses. James wanted to tell him he wouldn’t be leaving anytime soon, unless a bullet finally managed to do its job, but James was quite sure Q would keep all of those away from him. James watched for a minute as Q pulled up his trousers. He managed to put on his shirt over his shoulders but he fumbled with the buttons. James got up and crossed the room and wrapped his arms around Q, buttoning each of the buttons for him. “Thank you… I couldn’t do it.”

“It’ll be alright.”

“It’ll have to be, time to be Q, can’t afford to be Hamish anymore...he can’t seem to control this situation.”

“You always have control, even if you don’t think you do, trust me, I know.”

800Q8

James held Q’s hand as they walked towards Sherlock, Mycroft, Lestrade, and John remaining behind. “You could have waited for me?”

“And risk you? I could never do that.” Sherlock smiled slightly.

“You’re an idiot.”

“John tells me that often, but I think this time, I’m not.”

“You’re coming home.”

“Of course I am, I wouldn’t expect anything less from my son.” Sherlock smiled and Q let go of James to wrap his arms around his father. Sherlock hugged him back without any reluctance as sometimes he wasn’t quite accepting to touch. “I’ll be back in six months, you know that.” He smiled, kissing Q’s cheek before pulling away.

“Of course.”

“Give Mycroft hell while I’m away, won’t you? Someone needs to do it.”

“Always.” Q chuckled, stepping back to grab James’ hand.

“James? I need to speak to you.”

“Alright.” James nodded to Q and Q smiled faintly, slowly moving to his uncle’s side.

“You take care of my son, you understand. I know you love him and I know you’re capable, so you keep him safe.”

“Always.”

“That means keeping yourself safe too. And about that thing you got in Paris.” His voice was a bit softer, his lips not moving. “Well, I’m perfectly fine with it. In a way you remind me of a more insane John, but then again Hamish is a more sane me, so it works on balance… You’re good for him and I want him to have you at his side.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“Be good to him, son. He deserves to be happy.” Sherlock held out his hand and James shook it. “Truce then, doesn’t mean you’re my favorite person, but you’re his, so who am I to say no? Especially when you care so much about him.”

“Thank you.” James nodded and returned to Q, wrapping an arm around Q’s waist in support. John slowly walked forward and smiled faintly at Sherlock.

“So, here we are.” John sighed, looking around. “Actually, I can’t think of a single thing to say.”

“No, neither can I.”

“The game is over, I suppose.”

“The game is never over, John, but there may be some new players now.” He glanced over at his son and the agent he loved. “It’s okay, the East Wind takes us all in the end.”

“What’s that?”

“It’s a story my brother told me when we were kids: the East Wind is this terrifying force that lays waste to all in its path, it seeks out the unworthy, and plucks them from the Earth. That was generally me.” Sherlock chuckled.

“Nice.”

“So glad Hamish didn’t have to have a big brother like that, he was rubbish.”

“So what about you, then? Where are you actually going now?”

“Oh, some undercover work in Eastern Europe.”

“For how long?”

“Six months, my brother estimates: he’s never wrong.”

“And then what?” Sherlock looked down and John frowned. “You’re coming back you know?”

“That’s what I’ve been told and that’s what I’ll try to do.” Sherlock smiled, before kissing John.

“Is it wrong to ask for another miracle?”

“From me? Possibly. But I think our son’s a force to be reckoned with, you might ask him.”

“Bloody right he is. I’ve heard about some of his missions.”

“I’ll see you soon.”

“I love you.”

“And I you.”

They watched moments later as the plane took off and Q nodded sharply. “Well, I have work to do and six months to do it. I’ve had worse deadlines.”

800Q8

Six months later Q was sitting at his desk working at his computer with a smile. “Door is unlocked in five, four, three, two, one. Enter and duck left into the dip in the wall.” He watched as Alec and James’ heat signatures instantly ducked into the small space together the instant they made it through the door. “Stay there, the camera’s going to move off away again in ten seconds, sync. Once it moves I need you to go into the third door on the right. Go.” They both moved the instant he ordered it. “You’re free to speak now, I’ve got you.”

“ _Where are we going next_?” James asked.

“I’m working on the next lock, it’s the fifth door on the right, there will be five guards, make sure they all die quietly or we’re fucked.”

_“Yes, darling.”_

_“Quit flirting.”_

_“This is what we do.”_

_“It’s distracting_.” Alec sighed.

“ _You’re just jealous.”_

“He has a girlfriend and if he’s jealous, I’ll stab him.”

“ _Not on official girlfriend terms, you realize_?”

“If you don’t move your ass you’re going to lose her and I’ll kill you.” Q snapped.

“ _Understood, Q. Jesus, why’s your fucking boyfriend giving me dating advice?_ ”

“Because unlike you I’m not brain dead. Door unlocks in five seconds, be quiet you two.” The door opened and five silenced shots dropped all of the enemies too fast for them to scream. “Very good. I can’t believe we’re almost in. Up the stairs, time for a boss fight.”

“ _Dear god, too many video games for you._ ” Alec hissed. “ _Sonic or Dark Souls_?” He asked after a minute with a smile in his voice.

“Is that my scale from 1 to 10? Six then.” Q shrugged. “Alright, silence. The room ahead of you has fifteen people in it. I can keep the alarms from going off, but everyone will know you’re here after this. 007, the cufflinks you’re wearing, take them off.”

 _“Is this really the time you two?”_ Alec asked.

“I’m going to unlock the door in front of you, 006 take the ones in the middle, 007 throw the cufflinks into the corners and then both of you get your asses down, understood?”

“ _Yes, sir. Out of curiousity, what’s going to happen_?”

“Boom. Twice. Don’t worry the structural integrity will last.”

“ _Thanks_.”

“Door in three, two, one, go.” Q listened to gunshots and then heard both agents confirm they were out of the way before he blew the room to hell. “Alright?”

 _“Damn, I want those, Q.”_ 006 commented after a few seconds.

“ _Any chance for a pen like that?_ ”

“Not on your life. Next door’s unlocked, three men armed, twelve, two, and three all shifting towards three.” Q warned. “The package is on the table, the asset chained to the table, the target across from him, unmoved.”

“ _Understood.”_ Three shots and then a fourth. “ _Three dead, the target is wounded_.”

“The package and the asset?” Q asked.

800Q8

Alec walked to the target and tied his hands and legs, searching him for weapons, before he turned to pick up the laptop, shoving it into his bag. James instantly walked forward and touched the bleeding man in the center of the room, pushing up his head gently.

“Holmes?” James asked. Pale blue eyes barely blinked open, but they were still sharp and piercing.

“Bond?”

“You alright?”

“Can’t walk if that’s what you’re asking.” Sherlock muttered, still slumped and covered in bruises and cuts.

“ _007, the asset_?”

“Alive, you said you had extraction?” James asked as he began to unbind Sherlock.

“ _Fifty seconds, and don’t leave the room you’re in._ ”

“Трахни меня.” Alec snapped. “He looks like Q.”

“Очевидно.” Sherlock muttered back, then he glanced at Alec. “Oh, you don’t know. He didn’t tell him?”

“Technically, we’re on a mission in America and technically no one knows what we’re doing and we’re also on separate missions and as far as everyone’s aware Q’s working with 002.”

“He wasn’t authorized to save me.”

“No, he wasn’t, this was a favor.” James nodded.

“So’s the helicopter it sounds like.”

“Who is he?”

“ _Don’t move an inch and 006, он мой отец, это секрет, понял?"_ Q commented

“Yes, sir.” 006 responded before something else exploded.

“ _The ceiling in the next room is gone, the target had better be unconscious because the ride up to the helicopter will be hell otherwise._ ” Alec dragged the bleeding man with him, his bag on his back and James carried Sherlock, who was holding it together quite well for someone with a broken leg and several stab wounds on top of torture. _“Hurry, that helicopter can’t stay for long. And tell me when you’re all safe.”_

“Yes, Q.”

800Q8

“ _We’re all safe, Q and heading home.”_

“Good to hear, agents. You will be meeting with a team who will fly you home, the target, package, and the asset will be retrieved by a woman named Allison and Mr. Mycroft Holmes. Understood?”

“ _Yes, sir_.”

“Have a safe flight home.”

“ _See you soon, Q_.”

“Q out.”

“ _006 and 007 out._ ”

Q sighed in relief and picked up his phone dialing a number quickly. “ _Hello?_!”

“Papa, we’ve got him. He’s hurt, but he’ll be alright and he’s coming home.”

“ _Thank god, Hamish_.”

“Thank James and Alec. No one else could have done it. Mycroft will call with details as to where he’s transferring dad once he lands.”

“ _Thank you, Hamish. I love you_.”

“I love you too. He’ll be home in a few hours. Goodbye.”

_“Goodbye.”_

“I did it. I fucking did it.” Q chuckled and rubbed his head before making a call to Tanner, telling him he was going home an hour early.

Tanner thankfully didn’t give a damn.

800Q8

“You doing alright, Mr. Holmes?” James asked after they’d been transferred over to a plane and Sherlock had been mostly put back together, though his leg would have to be set in London.

“I’m fine.”

“Q will be glad to hear that.”

“Thank you.”

“Not a problem.”

“You haven’t asked him to marry you, I gave you permission, isn’t that what you were waiting for?”

“I’m giving it a bit of time.”

“You’re scared.”

“Weren’t you?”

“Terrified.” Sherlock laughed and started coughing. “Worth facing the fear though.”

“Go sit down, 007, we’re putting him under for the remainder of the flight.”

“Of course.” James nodded. “I wish you luck with your leg, that particular break fucking hurts.” James commented before he left, barely catching sight of Sherlock flipping him off as he walked away.

800Q8

“He’s alright.” Q smiled as he walked up to James in the hospital.

“I knew he would be, he seems like a resilient man.”

“Thank you so much.” Q sighed, flinging himself into James’ arms and sobbing with relief.

“Anything for you, love.” James promised, kissing the top of his head.

“I could have lost everything, him, you, agents, my job…”

“You didn’t.”

“Never let me put that much on the line again. It’s too much fucking stress. I have one cigarette left.”

“Well, that’s not bad, you only had three in that pack.”

“I bought two packs since you left two weeks ago.”

“Bloody hell, Q, no wonder why your clothes smell like smoke.” James sighed, pressing kisses across Q’s face. “Do you want to stay?”

“No, I’m alright, I want to go home and sleep like the dead with you holding me the entire time. I feel like shit and I need to eat, sleep, and take a bath.”

“Alright, we can make that happen, love. You won’t have to lift a finger, alright?”

“You’re amazing.”

“I know.” James teased before he wrapped an arm around Q’s waist and led him out of the hospital.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much love.


	39. You Weren't Sleeping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James practices popping the question while Q's sleeping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To all you who have waited for this moment.  
> Smile.

You Weren’t Sleeping

 

Months passed and the ring that James kept in his pocket constantly began to weigh a bit heavier. He wanted to ask, but damn it all he was fucking terrified. Logic told him Q would likely say yes, but he still couldn’t bring himself to ask. James sighed as he walked into the house, hanging his coat up before he snuck up the stairs. He showered in the detached bathroom so he wouldn’t wake Q up before he entered the room, pulling on pants and hiding the ring in his drawer at the same time.

James turned and smiled, seeing Q curled on his side of the bed, snuggling with one of his pillows. His hair was an adorable mess and he let out soft snores every once in a while. James smiled gently and climbed into his side of the bed, gently stroking Q’s arm as he slid under the blankets. “Mm, James?”

“It’s me, sweetie.” James promised, gently kissing Q’s lips. Q never fully woke up as he snuggled closer.

“Alright?”

“Just a recon mission, not a scratch on me, baby, go to sleep.”

“Okay, ‘ove you.”

“Love you too, darling.” James smiled, kissing his curls before resting on the pillow he managed to wiggle free from Q’s grip. The even breathing resumed as well as the small snores. James stared at Q for over an hour, unable to sleep, glancing up occasionally at the drawer before looking back at Q. Q looked like he hadn’t slept too well, but James knew Q didn’t sleep great when he wasn’t home, James didn’t sleep well without Q around either. “You worry about me a lot don’t you, baby?” James whispered.

“Mmhm.” Q sighed, his breathing not changing, his body still relaxed, his heartrate still slow and even. James had discovered that Q would talk in his sleep, usually during dreams, or when he was prompted. James found it endearing, and fun to screw around with at times. Q had once promised him an exploding pen in his sleep.

“It’s because you like me so much isn’t it?”

“Mmhm.” Q breathed, lightly.

James gently carded his fingers through Q’s hair, looking back up at the drawer before back down at Q. Perhaps it would be easier to ask him if he’d already asked him once, after all dreaming Q was often very honest, except about the pen, that still hadn’t fallen through. At least James would know what he was up against. “Would you marry me, Hamish?”

Green eyes opened and widened. “What?” Q asked.

“Shit, you’re awake?”

“I am now!” Q said sitting up. “What did you just ask me, just now?”

“Er...I.”

“Did you mean it?” Q asked tentatively.

“Yeah, I did.” James said, slowly sitting up.

“Of course I will, you idiot.” Q smiled and pulled James into his arms before kissing him soundly.

“I thought you were asleep.”

“Why in the bloody hell wouldn’t you ask me when I’m awake you idiot?”

“I was afraid you’d say no. Thought I’d get a warm up in… You’re usually asleep when I start talking to you.”

“Well when you ask someone to marry them they sort of wake up.” Q shook his head and laughed before wrapping his arms around James and burying his head against his chest. “I can’t believe you of all people were insecure about this.”

“Well, you are perfect.” James sighed as he lifted Q into his lap, pressing them close together.

“Far from it.”

“I love you, you know.”

“I love you too, you idiot.” Q chuckled.

“Oh, wait, one second.” James gently put Q down and walked across the room.

“You had a ring for me?”

“I’ve had it since Paris.”

“That’s why dad was so pissed off at you. I knew there was no way a sane person would walk away from video games.” Q teased.

“I got a text from Mycroft exactly ten seconds after I bought this.” James sighed, sitting back down on the bed and holding his hand out for Q’s. Q gave his hand over and James slipped it onto Q’s left hand the heart facing towards him.

“How in the hell did you get it the right size?”

“I’m a spy, I have my ways.” James smiled, pressing a kiss to the ring. “We’ll turn it around later, won’t we?”

“We’d better.” Q smiled. “Why this one, I’m curious?”

“It reminded me of you, with the emeralds, and of our relationship. Loyalty, love, friendship, all the trust that’s here… I thought it worked.”

“At risk of sounding like a girl, it’s perfect.”

“I’m glad.”

“Do you want one?”

“I can’t wear it on missions...maybe around my neck though.”

“I’ll find something.”

“Is that you’re way of saying you’ll modify something you find?”

“Yes.”

“You’re brilliant, how’d I get so lucky?”

“Apparently I like idiots.” Q smiled, kissing James again. “You know, I’d do the whole engagement sex thing, but I’m exhausted and you’re exhausted, so in the morning?”

“Morning sounds good.” James agreed before they both curled up together, falling asleep in each other’s arms.

800Q8

“You have to let me up.”

“I don’t have to actually.”

“I have work to do. And Tanner would likely panic if I showed up late, I do have a perfect record.” Q said, trying to wiggle out of James’ arms for the second time that morning.

“Call in sick.”

“I’m not sick, and 002  is in the field right now and 009 is going undercover, I need to be there to equip him.”

“He’ll be fine.”

“I thought you liked Ronson?”

“I do, doesn’t mean I don’t want you here right now.”

“Then bring me lunch.” Q ordered before managing to wiggle free of his grasp.

“Yes, sir.” James smirked, admiring the man as he walked away. “Need help in the shower?”

“I’m trying to get clean, so no.”

“Worth a shot.” James shrugged as the door closed.

800Q8

“When can I go back out into the field?” 001 sighed heavily.

“When your shoulder heals and your range scores bounce back you can go.” Q promised him, not looking up.

“I blame your shit stitching.”

“You interrupted a nice evening, of course they were a little bit less than ideal stitches.” Q smiled. “How were the young agents?”

“Most of them are useless. If those are the double-os of the future we’re in trouble… But there was one who was interesting.”

“Oh, who was that?”

“Eve I think was her name.”

“Miss Moneypenny?”

“Yes! Moneypants or whatever she’s called. She was decent, might make a good double-o one day.”

“I’ve worked with her in the field before, she actually follows orders, it was a nice change. She was lovely, brought me tea at the end of it. Not a bad day. She’ll make it far treating me as nicely as she does.”

“I treat you nice. Do I get new toys and fun gadgets? No… I don’t. I get shoddy stitches.”

“Don’t interrupt 007 and I then.”

“I would never stand between you and your favorite double-o.” 001 chuckled.

“002 is actually my favorite double-o, I get snacks and all of my equipment back every time without fail. 007 just happens to be my favorite man, big difference. However, I must admit 006 and 007 do get into the most interesting situations….usually puts me through hell though so I don’t know why I like big explosions.”

“Because boom is fun.”

“It is…” Q admitted.

“So, I saw the ring. I’m happy for both of you.”

“Thank you.”

“I hope you’re both happy.”

“We are.”

“So, have you gotten anything bad from people today?”

“Well, everyone in Q-branch is elated. M smiled at me...I may be a little afraid of that… I had a meeting with accounting though and I was pulled aside afterwards by a harpy who… Well, it doesn’t matter.”

“It matters to you. What’s wrong and who do I have to kill?”

“Don’t kill anyone. She just said I wasn’t good enough for him.”

“Who would dare say such a thing?”

“In bed. Because I’m inexperienced and young. Those weren’t her words, but those are synonyms.”

“You worry about it?”

“He’s James Bond, of course I worry.”

“You shouldn’t, not to get into you business, but he’d tell you, you know? Or teach you…”

“Would he though? He knows I’m a perfectionist and very hard on myself.”

“Ask him. By the way, do I get an invitation?”

“Probably not. We’re probably going to keep it really small, easily missed. Besides isn’t there a security risk to having too many operatives in one spot at the same time, especially for a wedding?”

“Like being at HQ? Everyone’s always here.”

“Valid point, but still small…”

“No, offense taken. I hope you two are happy and do talk to him about it, don’t let it fester, alright?”

“Sure. If you need help with the other agents I’m sure 006 would love to give them hell.”

“When can I stop this damn job? I just want to go out and start shooting at people again.”

“Approximately a week, I have an assignment in mind that would be perfect for your skill set. Retest in two days. If you’re close to passing I’ll fudge the numbers.”

“You trust me that much?”

“I trust all of my agents, if I didn’t trust them I’d find a way to get them benched.”

“Power-mad boffin, I like it.”

“Sure you do, go on, go bother someone else.”

“Alright. Congratulations. I’ll try to have a drink with your man at some point.”

“006 has decided to drag him off tonight, so you may be able to join in.”

“No drinking for you?”

“I don’t usually, so no. I’ll stay in.”

“Aw, you’re such a good little housewife.” 001 ruffled his hair. Q’s hand jolted forward and collapsed on a pressure point in 001’s hand. “Ow…”

“What did you say again?”

“Let go please.”

“That’s what I thought you said. Go on now, I’m busy.”

“Alright, alright.” 001 raised his hands in surrender and walked away, closing the door. As soon as the door closed the phone rang.

“Q-branch…” Q answered.

 _“You didn’t call._ ”

“Right...sorry Mycroft.”

“ _Oh, it’s not me you’ll have to apologize to. Your parents would love to invite both of you for dinner._ ”

“Oh no...please tell me they didn’t tell...”

“ _Mummy and Daddy will be there too_.”

“Fuck....”

_“Indeed. Best behavior, Hamish. And Gregory has missed you and is a bit angry that you didn’t tell him.”_

“Right…” They never had gone out for drinks with Lestrade.

 _“I’ve made reservations for Saturday. Of course it’s in a private room for security purposes._ ”

“Bless you, it’s in public...at least then no one can murder anyone.”

_“Wishful thinking, nephew. I will try to keep Gregory from a gun, but I can’t promise everything.”_

“Oh god no…” Hamish sighed as the line went dead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	40. The Whole Crew

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dinner and a game of Murder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had fun.

The Whole Crew

 

“I just knew it.” Grandmummy grinned and pulled Q and James into a tight hug the instant they stepped into the room. “I’m so glad for both of you. Though, I do wonder about great-grandchildren. We lucked out with Sherlock having you, but I don’t think that’s a possibility, maybe adoption though.”

“Let’s not have that discussion. And I need to breath to survive.” Q winced.

“Sorry, dears.”

“She just gets excited.” Siger sighed, shaking James’ hand and giving Q a brief hug. “We’re happy for you two.”

“Thank you.”

“Finally had the guts to do it then?” John asked with a smirk.

“Actually, he didn’t. He didn’t intentionally ask Hamish, it was a mistake...was he sleeping? Ah, yes, there it is.” Sherlock nodded at the look on James’ face.

“You guessed.” Hamish narrowed his eyes.

“I never guess.” Hamish raised an eyebrow. “Alright, I guessed, but it was a good guess. Let’s make this short, I’m outnumbered, which means there’s too much stupid in the room.”

“Sherlock, this is your family.” John warned.

“Exactly.”

“Play nice.”

“This is me being nice.” Sherlock smiled a fake smile before sitting down.

“I could kill him. I might actually, but the bloody man would have to solve his own murder.”

“That would be interesting.” Q nodded. “And he actually could solve his own murder if he had a death similar to that of the Invisible Man Case.”

“I’d have to think of a quicker way to kill him.” John nodded.

“Guns are usually efficient.” James commented.

“Too easy to figure out who did it.” Q shook his head. “It’s sort of a game we play, thinking on how we’d murder everyone around us without getting caught. Our method can’t be lead back to us.”

“I’d poison John, asphyxiate Mycroft, and now that Hamish has a brand-new job, an assassination, single bullet to the head would work just fine, especially with so many wanting him dead. I could kill both mummy and daddy with their favorite salad at their favorite restaurant. And Lestrade…”

“Are you planning on killing me already? I just got here.”

“Uncle Greg.”

“You are in big trouble, haven’t had a proper talk with the man and you’re getting married.”

“Sorry…” Q looked down.

“It’s alright, remind me again how you’d kill Sherlock? You were playing Murder right?” Lestrade inquired.

“His violin strings. I happen to know a thing or two about chemicals that can make a person drop dead in an instant...no symptoms.”

“Music to my ears, Hamish.” Greg applauded.

“I guess you think you’re clever.” Sherlock rolled his eyes.

“I _am_ clever.”

“For a goldfish.” Sherlock smirked at Mycroft. Mycroft looked back at him calmly before taking Greg’s arm in a manner that looked tentative somehow, as if he didn’t normally do so in public. James noticed.

“A few death threats recently. They haven’t been seeing much of each other.” Q told James.

“Oh.”

“Our family lives aren’t always the easiest. Sometimes we go months without seeing each other.”

“Which can be a pleasure in some cases.” Sherlock hissed.

“Be nice to your brother, Sherlock.” Mrs. Holmes insisted.

“We were supposed to get drinks sometime, you realize?”

“Sorry, Uncle Greg. We were a little busy, with dad and terrorists and...such.”

“Well, we’ll spend time somewhere else. Are you happy?”

“Very.”

“That’s all I could ever hope for, ‘Mish.”

“Yes, yes, wonderful. I hoping for daggers. I suppose I’ll have to provide my own entertainment.” Sherlock huffed sitting in his chair next to John. Q sighed and pressed a kiss to James’ ear.

“Don’t drink anything you’re given.” Hamish whispered before sitting down himself.

“You’ve gone and taken the fun away, haven’t you?” Sherlock huffed.

“Someone has to, dad. We all know how family dinners go when you’re bored. I wouldn’t order your favorite desserts everyone, they may be off as well, especially yours Mycroft.”

“He’d really do that?” James asked.

“If it meant entertaining himself? Yes. Are you sure you want to marry into this?” John inquired.

“If I get Q I suppose I can live on my toes enough to keep you lot from getting me killed.”

“Well, you’re on your toes enough, you managed to bring me back.” Sherlock commented.

“Oh, so he gets thanked. I saved you from rotting in jail or likely getting killed by someone that you put away yourself and Hamish here brings you back and you thank the agent?” Mycroft asked.

“Yes, and do thank that Russian fellow, he was quite charming as well, good sense of humor, almost likable given the goldfish nature of most agents.”

“Maybe I’ll have that drink after all. Mycroft can I have your glass, no doubt he predicted where you would sit, it’s the easiest way to avoid the fire fight that is sure to come next.” Q asked holding out his hand.

“If I have to suffer through, we all do, ‘Mish.” Lestrade sighed, taking the glass away from Mycroft and setting it on the floor.

“Wonderful.”

800Q8

“Goodnight everyone.”

“You take care of our boy, young man.” Grandmummy called to James. James nodded back simply before watching both Q’s grandparents and parents disappear. Q collapsed against James’ side.

“Never again. I can’t handle so many of them in one room.” Q whispered as James wrapped an arm around him.

“I’ll protect you.”

“No, that’s final. We’re not having a big wedding and we’re certainly not doing Christmas, ever.”

“We’re not all that bad, are we?” Lestrade asked, his arm in Mycroft’s.

“On your own, you are all quite manageable. I can’t handle you all together.”

“You’ve got a point. Myc and Sherlock want to kill each other, the grandparents wish to strangle both of them, you can be hell and John and I have to try to help win the fight for our men, honestly family reunions probably aren’t the best idea for us.”

“Not at all.”

“But I still had better get a wedding invitation, young man.”

“Might be via webcam so I don’t have to deal with this ever again.”

“If that’s what it comes to.” Lestrade chuckled.

“Goodnight you two.” Q smiled slightly.

“Yes, goodnight, and thank you for not letting a war start tonight.” James nodded.

“Yes, quite…” Mycroft nodded. “I think you’ll be good for him in the way that John is good for Sherlock...except Hamish is quite sane and you are not, quite the opposite of the doctor and the detective. Hamish?”

“Yes?”

“Yemen, the answer is in the sand.” Q looked confused only for a minute before his eyes filled with light.

“Oh...OH! That makes sense. 004 is going to love getting out of that hellhole. Thank you so much.”

“Should I know?” James asked.

“Mission above your clearance, sorry, I’ll tell you when it’s over.” Q smiled. “I’ve been looking at it the wrong way. I’ve got it now, thank you.”

“Sometimes a second pair of eyes are helpful.” Mycroft opened the door and stepped out into the rain with Lestrade, opening his umbrella to cover both of them. “Well, goodnight you two.”

“Goodnight.”

“And Hamish, webcam or not I’d better be invited. I am your favorite after all.”

“Of course you are.” Q grinned as Mycroft rolled his eyes. “We don’t have a date though, not like we’re rushing.”

“Well there is the prospect of a honeymoon to consider, maybe we should set a date.” James winked at Q, who promptly turned red.

“I could have you killed, you know?”

“Myc, they’re getting married and it’s not like it hasn’t already happened. While the image is disturbing let’s move on, shall we?”

“Quite.” Mycroft nodded, both he and Lestrade walking away, Lestrade waving to them before they got into the black car at the end of the road.

“I should really just poison everyone next time.” Q shook his head.

“I had my gun.”

“Good, next time, we start at the kneecaps.” James chuckled and the two of them walked home, hand in hand through the rain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	41. Mister and Mister

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wedding bells and all that jazz.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's taken so long... I haven't been able to write recently. Don't know why. Mental thing I think.  
> I will get this all done! I swear it!

Mister and Mister

 

“So, last night of freedom, and you’re spending it with me?” Alec asked.

 

“I don’t think of it as freedom. I think of it as today we’re not married tomorrow we will be.” James shrugged, lifting his glass.

 

“You really see it that way? Marriage is a big deal, especially for one of us.”

 

“Not really, it’s just paperwork so that the powers that be have an official record. Other than that, it’s a way to show him I’m serious, very much in love with him. For me, it’s just another way of making sure he knows the truth.”

 

“You’re in deep.”

 

“You didn’t notice that before?”

 

“I did, I just didn’t see how much.” Alec sighed.

 

“I’m happy for you two.” Tanner commented with a smile.

 

“Thanks.” James smiled glad that only a few hours later the night was out. He went home to Q sitting in the living room, book in hand, computer on his lap. “I shouldn’t be seeing you right now.”

 

“To hell with tradition, at least you’re not falling over drunk.”

 

“Alec tried, trust me he did. What about Greg and Jason?”

 

“They knew better than to try to get me drunk. I threatened their livelihoods.” Q shrugged.

 

“Of course you did.” James sighed and walked across the room, tipping Q’s head back and pressing a kiss to his lips. 

 

“Mm, and I can make it so Jason can’t walk, so that was a good threat to have as well.” 

 

“Sh.” James chuckled kissing him again.

 

“Mm yep, I’m shutting up now.” Q smiled into the kiss. “So, how set are you on tradition, because I kind of want you to sleep next to me tonight.”

 

“Not with you, just next to you?” James taunted with a smirk. “Are you sure that’s all you want?”

 

“We’ll if you want to completely disregard tradition, I have no complaints.”

 

“We should save it for Italy, but, I am completely alright with breaking a few rules.”

 

“Good, me too. Besides, we’re living together already, not really a point to it.”

 

“So, what are you doing?”

 

“Destroying terrorists, checking out our systems, and reading Koontz at the same time.”

 

“And that is why you’re my favorite.” James grinned, gently rubbing Q’s shoulders, feeling the tension in them. Q always worked too hard. When everything was going to hell Q was there and in control through it all, when things were going well, Q worked to make sure nothing went to hell. The man was a machine, working constantly to keep everyone safe. It made Q, Q...but James really wished he’d take more time to rest at times.

 

“I know.”

 

“But, tonight you need to go to sleep.”

 

“But I have work to do.” Q protested, still typing, but groaning and leaning into the massage gratefully. 

 

“You’re on vacation.”

 

“I have a laptop, I’m never on vacation. Little bit closer to, yes, there...” Q sighed, leaning forward as James rubbed closer to his neck.

 

“You will be after tomorrow, you promised.” James stated.

 

“I did not.”

 

“That was the deal though. I’m on vacation, you’re on vacation. Except for emergencies, I know, and I get to keep my gun. Come on, vacation starts now.”

 

“But there’s this weird little hitch that I want to fix before I forget about it, I don’t think anyone else would notice it in Q-branch. It’s strange. It almost looks like a flaw in the system, but it’s just nothing… I think someone managed to botch the programing a bit.”

 

“You said you only hired the best.”

 

“I do, but I’m the best and they aren’t on my level.”

 

“It can wait.”

 

“But…”

 

“Mister Hamish Quinton Watson-Holmes-Bond, we’re not arguing anymore. Come to bed.” James said and stopped rubbing Q’s neck. “No massage until you come to bed.” Q sighed in sorrow for the stopped massage.

 

“I think we need less hyphenation…” Q said, thinking on the name.

 

“Really? What are you thinking of?”

 

“Hamish Q. Bond. Q Bond for short.” James was temporarily taken aback. Q had picked his name over his family name. It was a bit beyond astonishing. Q loved being a Watson-Holmes, he was proud of it.

 

“I think I like that.”

 

“I think I do too.” Q smiled as James pressed a kiss to his lips and he didn’t argue as James closed his laptop and carried him to the bedroom. “I still get the massage though, right? My neck is killing me.”

 

“Yes, you can still get the massage, you idiot.”

 

“You love me anyways.”

 

“I do…”

 

“I see what you did there.” Q chuckled and kissed James’ cheek.

 

“You’re supposed to say it back.” James said as he sat Q down on the bed.

 

“Not tonight. Ask me again tomorrow.”

 

800Q8

 

“You made it.” Q smiled and wrapped his arms around Lestrade.

 

“There was doubt, kiddo?” His uncle asked, hugging him back.

 

“I was monitoring CCTV. You’ve had a busy morning. I didn’t think you’d make it.”

 

“You shouldn’t be on your laptop today.”

 

“What else was I supposed to do? I was already dressed and if I paced anymore there would have been a hole in the ground.”

 

“Nervous about the wedding? Don’t worry, your dad was worried about his too.”

 

“Wedding? No. I have a flight in less than five hours to get on and it’s making me nervous as hell. “

 

“You were convinced to get on a plane?”

 

“James said he’d bring back equipment for a month if I flew. He also promised to make sure I didn’t die of a heart attack on the damn thing. I hated planes before, but ever since that incident a few months back with...well never mind. It makes me wonder if I’ll make it home and all that. But, James will be with me, so I’ll be safe. Mostly.”

 

“He will be taking his gun right?” Greg wondered.

 

“It’s James, he has it under his arm right now. He would never go anywhere without one. There are three total coming with us. You know...just in case.”

 

“You’re a Holmes, you attract bullets.”

 

“I’m about to be a Bond, and they are actually worse with bullets, believe it or not.” Q shrugged and sighed as his parents walked up to him. John lifted a hand, but Sherlock caught his hand.

 

“Don’t be an idiot, John, you’ll only make it worse.” Sherlock commented, straightening Q’s black tie until it sat perfectly. “Now, don’t touch it.”

 

“Thank you, I suppose.”

 

“We’ve scoped out the place, doesn’t look like there’s anyone out to crash the party.” John told him with a smile. “We’re really got too many important government officials in the same room at the same time.”

 

“That happens when you invite the government.” Sherlock rolled his eyes. “You’re nervous. What for? Ah! The flight. John, I told you that you should have brought a sedative.”

 

“You wanted that for Mycroft.”

 

“But now we’ve missed an opportunity to use it where it’s needed. Always be prepared.”

 

“I would rather be conscious on the plane, just in case I need to blow something up or fly or grab a parachute. Can we not talk about this?”

 

Sherlock, for once, actually listened to a request. “So you’re not wearing a white tux?”

 

“No, we agreed on black. Would you two mind getting in there so the grandparents don’t start sobbing uncontrollably. You’d think I was about to die… Which may happen, considering that I’m about to get on a damn metal contraption that shouldn’t be in the air. Damn flying coffins…”

 

“Hamish, relax, it will be fine. You’re not going to die.” John promised as Sherlock and Greg left to gain control over weepy family members. “Are you sure you’re not nervous about...anything else?”

 

“No. I’m fine, better than, I’m perfect. He’s everything I could have asked for. Sure he, brings home scraps with a damn smirk like a cat and he gets shot at and he’s irritating and well, a blunt instrument. He’s brilliant. He’s really, really fantastic.”

 

“He’s good for you.”

 

“Yes,” Q smiled. “Yes he is.”

 

800Q8

 

The wedding was simple. There were no flowers or fancy frills. What few guests there were (the Holmes family and their spouses, Alec, Jason, Tanner, Mrs. Hudson, Molly, and surprisingly Harry) stood in the room in a semi-circle. Mycroft officiated, leaning on his umbrella the entire time in an almost imposing manner, as if he were silently threatening James, warning him to not make a single wrong step with his nephew. James didn’t seem to notice the passive aggression, nor the way Greg kept glaring at Mycroft (if Sherlock was behaving, certainly Mycroft could), he seemed only focused on Q and gently rubbing his thumbs across the back of Q’s hands.

 

Mrs. Hudson managed to tough it out longer than Molly and Mrs. Holmes, but she lost it when Mycroft asked them to state their vows.

 

“I, and if this name leaves this room I’ll kill you, Jason,” James and Alec laughed, Jason winced. “Hamish Quinton Watson-Holmes, promise you, James Bond, that no matter how bad your days get that I’ll be there, in your ear or at your side. I will always be loyal to you. I promise to be at your side on the best of days and the worst, until they’re good again. I’ll stitch you back together when you get shot and I’ll hold you when the wounds are too deep for stitches. I’ll protect you and guide you, and make sure you always have a home to come back to. I promise to always love you, all the days of my life.” They weren’t traditional by any means, but they fit the two of them.

 

“I, James Bond...fuck it, I’ve never been good with formalities. I can’t promise to bring back your equipment or to make sure I come back in one piece myself. However, I can promise I’ll fight like hell to get back to you every time I leave. I promise to stay at your side, whether it’s awful or happy. I promise to protect you and help you through all of the decisions you are forced to make. I promise to take care of you and myself because you seem to really like having me around and I don’t want you to be unhappy. I’ll always love you, with every breath.”

 

“Sherlock?” John asked quietly.

 

“What?” Sherlock hissed back.

 

“You’re crying, rather sentimental of you.” Mycroft pointed out. Q glanced at his father to see that there was indeed a bit of a shine on his cheeks. “I’d thought someone would make it through this unscathed.”

 

“Mycroft!” Greg called out.

 

“And there’s that moment gone because of my family.” Q chuckled. “Didn’t expect anything less.”

 

“I think it’s fine.” James shrugged. It wasn’t like he ever did anything by the book.

 

“Do you?” 

 

“I do.” James smiled.

 

“I do too.”

 

“I was going to get there.” Mycroft commented.

 

“Beat you to it.” Q smiled before pulling James into a kiss.

 

“Yes, that’s, this is all very strictly official isn’t it?” Mycroft shook his head.  James and Q couldn’t care less. The paperwork had already been done. They simply lived in the moment, taking each other in as the rest of the world faded away. Even Alec’s wolf-whistles went unheard by the two of them. 

 

“I love you.” Q whispered, resting his forehead against James.

 

“I love you.” James smiled back, grabbing Q’s left hand and slowly pulling the ring off of it, turning it around and sliding it back on. “There, now it’s right.”

 

“Oh, that reminds me.” Q pulled a necklace out of his pocket and put it over James’ head. 

 

“What’s this?”

 

“You can’t wear a ring, but you can wear this. Dog tags, like the ones you gave me, only with a more secret meaning. I actually got you a wedding ring and flattened it and engraved it and...well the cord tears before enough pressure can be put on it to choke you so it can’t hurt you and it’s not, you know, professional or anything but...mmph!” James kissed Q again and Q sighed happily, hugging James tightly.

 

“It’s perfect.” James promised with one last kiss to his cheek before they were surrounded by loved ones.

 

800Q8

“You’re going to be fine.”

 

“You promise?” Q asked, sitting down and buckling his seatbelt.

 

“I should have added keeping you safe and sane on planes to my vows.” James shook his head. “You’ll be fine, I promise.” James smiled, sitting next to him and taking his hand. The doors closed and Q tightened his grip on James’ hand. “Q? Q? Mr. Bond?”

 

“I kind of like that.” Q smiled, relaxing slightly.

 

“Me too.” James smiled, kissing Q’s temple. “Don’t worry about anything, I’ve got you. Think about other things...we are going on a honeymoon, after all. Just think of all the things we could get up to.” James whispered with a smirk.

  
“Okay, that’s a bit distracting.” Q agreed with a smile, his eyes closed. “A lovely distraction at that.” Q nodded, managing to stay inside his skin during take-off with James’ hand on his, his voice soothing him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	42. Honeymoon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What it says on the tin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is all up to xphil98197. Direct love thusly.

Honeymoon

  
  


The plane landed in Pisa just as the sun was going down. The cypress trees were a lush green on the hill winding along the fence lines bordering the vineyards. The tarmac was smooth, and they were at the gate before Q had time to panic. The car that was waiting for them at the airport was a convertible, and they pulled up to the small hotel where they were staying as the stars came out. The hotel had vineyards along the hills, and there was an older woman standing on the porch. 

 

“Welcome to Tuscany, Mr. and Mr. Bond,” she smiled. “I am Signora Abelie. I’m so glad you could come. I spent my honeymoon here, and well, that was years ago. I fell in love and never left. Your room is at the top of the stairs on the left. Dinner is waiting whenever you’d like, I left plates warming in the oven.”

 

“Thank you,” Q smiled. “Grazie.”

 

“Grazie, Signora,” James smiled. “It's a pleasure to be here.”

 

“My room is across the courtyard, and you can come find me whenever you wake up and are ready for breakfast. I assume you won’t want it to be too early,” she smiled. “Goodnight.”

 

James carried the two suitcases up the wooden stairs. The room she had ready for them had smooth wood floors, and curtains that were blowing in the open windowed breeze had been washed so many times that the flowers were faded. The bed spread had a hand sewn quilt, and there were large pillows.

 

“Its… perfect,” Q smiled shyly. “Wow. I wonder if she made these.”

 

“Probably, they’re about the right age. But come here,” James held out his arms. “Do you need a shower?”

 

Q shook his head.

 

“To use the restroom?” James smirked.

 

“No,” Q looked puzzled.

 

“Glass of water?” James reached for Q and unbuttoned his shirt. “Because once we get in bed, I’m not letting you out until tomorrow.”

Q couldn’t help it, a giggle escaped.

 

“What’s funny, Mr. Bond?” James asked, his eyes twinkling. “Did you have plans for this evening?”

 

“No-” Hamish let his breath out with a woosh when James pushed him back to land on the bed. James made short work of his trousers and pants.

 

“I hear the leaning tower is spectacular,” James smirked.

 

“Uh-huh,” Hamish didn’t hear a word, just licked his lips as James stripped off his shirt. 

 

“Did you know it's been leaning for longer than it stood straight?” James pounced on him with a growl.

 

“I’m quite sure I don’t care,” he was struggling with James belt, fumbling to get it off of him. “Please, want you,” he begged.

“Easy, I have you,” James put Hamish’s arms around his neck. “Just relax.” He took control of the kiss, letting Hamish work off the case of nerves that had been building up with the wedding and the flight. He worked his lips down Hamish’s stomach, stopping at each spot that made his husband sigh. He left him with small bruises on his belly, a trail down to his sex lines, the vee of muscles that led from his abs to prominent hip bones. . 

 

“You sound like you’re going to eat me,” Q propped himself up on his elbows to tug at James’s hair. He was panting, his lips a dark red from biting them to stop from crying out. 

 

“Not eat you, but… would you like to try being on bottom tonight?” James stopped to look at him, suddenly serious. His hair was sticking up from Hamish’s fingers, and there was a sheen of sweat on his face. He handed Hamish the lube and bent to kiss him.

 

“Yes! There’s condoms in my bag.”

 

“Don’t need them,” James shook his head, and reached for his discarded pants pocket. He handed Hamish a sheet of paper, a set of blood test results. “I thought this might be the perfect time to try without them? This way you can focus on the difference in feeling, one more thing to keep you out of your head?”

 

“You planned this?” Hamish asked. “It was a sweet thing to do.”

 

“Not on purpose, I was scared you would say no,” James bent to kiss him. “Couldn’t get up the nerve.”

 

“How many time do I have to tell you, us Holmes men choose for life,” Hamish insisted. “Now get over here and get inside me before I get too nervous about the idea.”

 

“Bossy, I like it,” James’s grin was genuine, unguarded. He bent to the job of teasing Hamish with his mouth, enough to distract his boffin from the nerves. He lapped at him slowly, teasing him until his face was awash in pure pleasure and sensation before tracing a slicked finger across his hole.

 

By that point Hamish was past words, murmuring something that included James’s name while he tugged on his hair. “I have you, just pull on my ears if you need me to stop, alright?” James looked up at him, suddenly serious. “If you start to panic, I want to know. We can always stop.”

 

“Don’t… I don’t want to stop, they’ve won too many times,” Hamish caught his breath.

 

“This has nothing to do with them winning, this has to do with us enjoying it, and we can do it on whatever time frame we feel comfortable with,” James assured him. “But now is just fine with me,” he added, when Hamish groaned in protest. He added a second finger, and then a third. 

 

“James, if you don’t get inside me, I’m going to come and then fall asleep,” Hamish protested. “Honestly, I’m not breakable love.”

 

“Yes Sir, Master Bond,” James teased. He slicked up his cock and sank into Hamish before he allowed himself any second thoughts. His husband was right, he did tend to be overprotective. But Hamish was sure of himself, and he needed to learn to trust that the man who could bring him home from the field safely also knew what he wanted. 

 

Hamish’s face was soft with pleasure, and James used that as a gauge of how fast to move. He was making little sounds of contentment, and pulling James closer. James bent to kiss him and ended up clutching Hamish to his chest, unable to get close enough. It was enough to make him self conscious, that he’d been hoping to be spectacular in bed, but now all he wanted was to please his husband.

 

“You’re wonderful,” he whispered roughly, not trusting his voice beyond that. He took Hamish’s cock in his hand and managed to time his thrusts somewhat along the same pace. He came first, a cry that left tears in his eyes. That was all it took for Hamish to climax, making a whine of pleasure and biting at James’s lips.

 

James managed to find his shirt and wipe them off before his eyes closed, although Hamish was already tucked against his neck, breaths even. “Goodnight, Mister Bond,” James whispered, reveling in the smile that stole across Hamish’s face. 

 

“Goodnight, love.”

 

800Q8

 

True to popular knowledge, the Tower did lean. Q spouted off a list of calculations of how long it would take for it to fall completely, and how to tell the time according to their shadows. James was able to convince him to take the typical touristy photos that made it look as if they were holding the Tower in their hand. Hamish retaliated by managing to capture a picture of James snoring with his mouth open after their picnic lunch.

 

They spent the evening on the porch after enjoying a meal of homemade pasta and tiramisu. Hamish felt content and lazy, and ready to burst. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of James, whose eyes were  the same color as the evening sky, twinkling with love like stars. By the time they climbed the stairs hand in hand, James had a hand under his shirt as well, cushioning his hips from the cold.

 

The next morning, Hamish managed to convince Signora Abelie to ship a case of her homemade wine, and some of the hand pressed olive oil and lemoncello that he had tested in her kitchen. It would be waiting for them when they got back to London, and she promised to send along some of her vinaigrette as soon as it was done.

 

She packed them another lunch the next day, and they went to see the magnificent marble tomb inside the Duomo at Lucca. Hamish spent a long time, running his palms over the smooth marble. It left him a bit shaken. He was already all too aware of his own mortality, and it took an afternoon in the sun of the piazza to chase off the gloom.

 

That evening they were invited to dine with Signora Abelie and her grandchildren, who were visiting from the next town. One of the young men had brought a violin, and another a guitar. James danced with Hamish, the emeralds the same color as his eyes in the full moon light. They dozed off around a bonfire, and James carried him upstairs just as the moon was setting.

 

*** 

 

They didn’t leave until noon, and arrived in Florence well in time to check into their hotel and nap before dinner. They had dinner in the restaurant on the ground floor of the hotel, and then sat on the patio to hear the musicians strolling by in the piazza. James sat with a cappuccino, and biscotti while Hamish sat with his chin on his hand, listening to an older blind singer who was working his way through aria after aria, accompanied by an accordion.

 

By the time they wandered up to their room, it was late, and James was carrying a bottle of red wine with them, no glasses. Hamish took a sip from the bottle before pinning James for a kiss in the stairwell. James managed to get them both back to the room before either’s trousers ended up around their knees, but it was a close thing. 

 

***

 

They woke late, and called for breakfast to be brought up to the room. They drove the short drive to Arezzo, and checked into the hotel. A walk through the small shops in the town was the perfect way to stretch their legs after the long car ride. 

 

They stopped at one of the local enoteches, the local wine shop, to taste the varieties from the surrounding vineyards. Chianti was as beautiful as the pictures on the wine bottles, and James watched fondly as Hamish arranged for a case of the local varieties to be shipped home.

 

The next day they woke early and drove the Strada Chiantigiana, the roadway through the region. It led them to the Castello di Brolio, a castle that had an adjacent vineyard, that had been built in a previous millennia. They enjoyed lunch in the shade of the castle walls, a bottle of the wine between them. Hamish found himself drowsing in the warm sun, his head on James’ lap.

 

***

 

The hour and a half ride to Montepulciano meant they arrived in time for lunch, pici, the local pasta, and a glass of the local vino nobile. A tour of church with a name that James stumbled over, and then there was a palace that had belonged to a magistrate in the days when the great architects were still designing the frescoes. They opted for a nap, and then got up to go watch the stars from the roof.

 

“The skies are beautiful here, with none of the electric street lamps,” James wrapped his arms around Hamish from behind. “You look… younger, I think… certainly more relaxed. You aren’t carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders.”

 

“Its nice to be able to just be in love,” Hamish relaxed into the safe arms encircling him. 

 

“In love, in bed…” James’ fingers crept between the buttons of his shirt, chilly in the night air. He teased across Hamish’s belly.

 

“Fine! Your fingers are cold anyway,” Hamish laughed. They climbed back into their room through the window, 

 

***

 

The gothic city of Siena greeted them in the late afternoon sun, the terracotta tiles reflecting the Tuscan sun. They spent the evening listening to a concert in the Piazza del Campo, the notes of Scarlatti teasing across the evening breeze.

 

The cafe where they stopped to eat felt more like eating in someone’s kitchen, the noise homelike. There seemed to be a great deal of regular customers or extended family, judging by the fact that names were known. The host greeted most of the other customers with a kiss on both cheeks, and even personally introduced himself.

 

When he found out they were in town to celebrate their honeymoon, he insisted that they join he and his wife at their tables. Of course there was the secret family pasta and wine combination that was not to be missed. Hamish thrilled them by asking if they could ship some to England, and that led to dessert, and someone bringing out a violin. Soon the tables were pushed back against the walls, and James offered Hamish a hand up to dance.

 

***

 

In Rome, the tour of the vatican library was astounding, even to two people who weren’t wholly religious.

 

“Do you wonder what they were thinking, carrying all these things back here on boats half a millenia ago? Did the people they took them from realize this was what they would be remembered for?” Hamish studied a green feathered headdress that came clear from Mexico. It had graced the head of the last Aztec King.

 

“I think they only thought about the riches, and gold,” James said. “Remember, these priests thought they were saving the souls of the heathens. But I double that countries really funded expeditions for that purpose. They wanted gold to fund their wars and world takeovers. This just made them more likeable to the general populace.”

 

“What do you think they will remember us for?” Hamish asked thoughtfully as they returned the rental car at the airport. “Will our computers be so outdated that they will never know that we are just like them? No matter how many centuries go by, we still fall in love, losing people still scares us.

 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t think Venice was a good idea,” James said as they waited for their flight. “Too many memories, and there are enough shadows in our lives. We don’t need to go looking for any.”

 

“I heard the canals smell bad,” Hamish crinkled his nose. “I think I can do without smelly water and rickety gondolas. The planes are as good as you’ll get out of me this trip. And besides, Vesper can rest in peace, James. You didn’t make that decision for her and frankly she wasn’t your fault. We knew she was twisted from the beginning, not bad just...twisted the wrong way by emotion. Her death was her doing, but frankly, I don’t want to visit it while we’re here, we have better things to think about and do rather than dwelling on work.”

  
“Couldn’t agree more.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	43. Cigarettes and Promises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time skip, get ready for Skyfall. ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 43 chapters, you are all champs for sticking around.  
> Enjoy.

Cigarettes and Promises

 

Seven years passed with the two of them side-by-side. There were ups and downs, of course there were, but they remained constant, strong. It was a good life, both got to do what they loved and come home to the one they loved more than anything else.

 

“Where is he?” James asked, walking into Q-branch, his left arm was in a sling, a bone broken in two places. R bit her lip and frowned at him. 

 

“Did you hear about it?”

 

“About what? What happened?” James asked, seeing her worry.

 

“Ronson’s mission didn’t go so well.”

 

“Is he alive?”

 

“He’s fine. Q just had to make a very tough decision. He’s on the roof. I think he’s trying to get lung cancer, but aside from that he’s just being Q. He cares so much.” R frowned. “I don’t think it’s appropriate to bring up birthdays, he seems really upset.”

 

“Alright, I’ll look after him.”

 

“Please do.” R nodded before going back to work. James headed for the roof and gently pushed the door open. Q was sitting on the edge of the roof, smoking, wrapped in the jacket he’d stolen from James and had never actually gave back. James didn’t mind, he liked the way it looked on him. James slowly walked forward and sat down next to him, sitting in silence for a moment.

 

“How’s your arm?”

 

“I’ve had worse.” James shrugged.

 

“Want one?” Q asked, holding his pack of cigarettes out. There were three left. James had left Q with a nearly full pack. James knew it was more than just an offering, but he took one anyway. He didn’t smoke often, but he would with Q. Q flipped on a lighter and lit it for him before putting it back in his pocket. Q’s eyes had never left the horizon. James took a single drag from it, slowly letting it out.

 

“So, that bad?”

 

“I smoked one in honor of your arm, if that helps.”

 

“No, not really.”

 

“If I would have been your handler that wouldn’t have happened.”

 

“It was my mistake, not Cole’s. I acted too slow, broke my arm.” James sighed. “Makes me wonder if I’m getting old.”

 

“You’re not even forty.” Q scoffed. “You’re in better shape than even the rookie double-os.”

 

“Before you came here thirty-five was too old for agents, most were dead at that point. I just...don’t want to end up like that.”

 

“I’ll always bring you home.” Q promised.

 

“I never doubt you. I doubt me sometimes.”

 

“You can’t afford doubt.” Q shook his head. “I’ll make you a deal, if you ever get too old for this game, I’ll tell you. If I ever feel like you can’t take it anymore, I’ll let you know.”

 

“Promise.”

 

“I’ll hurt your feelings if necessary.” Q nodded. 

 

“I’ll trust you.” James smiled. “What will I do? I don’t think I’ll have the patience to teach.”

 

“I’d find room in Q-branch if necessary. We always need people willing to test things, guns and explosives included. Might help you keep your adrenaline craving in check.”

 

James hummed in response. “So, do you need to talk about it?”

 

“You already know.”

 

“I don’t. I came to wish you a happy birthday, being thirty and all, but R said you were up here.”

 

“It’s my birthday? Didn’t even realize. That just makes it all worse, actually.” Q said, crushing the remains of his cigarette on the ground with his palm before grabbing another and lighting it. James would have asked him to stop, if he knew it would help, but he knew Q would get through what he needed to and then be back to himself. “Five. Five children died today because of me.”

 

James waited and didn’t say a word.

 

“Ronson was in trouble, so instead of getting the baddie like I was supposed to I got him out, which meant that a terrorist got away with a bomb. He was going to level an entire city. Instead, because I made a mistake I used a secondary explosive Ronson planted on him to kill him and destroy the bomb before he got to the city.” Q took a drag. “He was on a train, with woman and children, families and innocents and...I killed them just to get rid of him because I was afraid of sending Ronson further in. In hindsight I probably should have trusted him a bit more, but the odds were so stacked against him and he’d been shot… I just didn’t want to have to send an agent to die, a friend to die. So I killed kids instead apparently.”

 

“Q”

 

“Don’t say it wasn’t my fault. It was.”

 

“We all have to make bad decisions. It was them or thousands, Q. We can’t win them all, Q.” James sighed.

 

“I don’t like losing. I like winning, I’m used to winning.”

 

“I know. No one likes to lose. Are you going to be alright?”

 

“Yeah. I just need some time, I guess.”

 

“How about we go home early today? Some tea, a shower, some sleep, you look like you haven’t slept in a few days.”

 

“Three, I think. I took a nap though on the sofa for about an hour yesterday.”

 

“Not enough. Come on, I’ll drive.”

 

“Okay.” Q agreed, getting up and crushing the cigarette, half finished. James wrapped his good arm around him and walked him back into the building, not letting him go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	44. Istanbul

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two years later, everything goes downhill... Well, off a train actually.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Skyfall, ladies and gents.

“Ronson’s going with you right?” Q asked, his voice stuffy and congested, not looking up from his computer as his face wrinkled. 

 

“Yes, him and” Q sneezed. “Bless you.” James chuckled. “And some junior agent, I think.”

 

“Don’t laugh, I feel awful.” Q shook his head.

 

“Then get medicine.”

 

“That requires going to medical, not happening. The last time I went in there they tried to keep me there for a week. I don’t have the time.”

 

“Well if you hadn’t have let yourself get so sick you might have been there for less time.”

 

“Says the man who comes home with broken bones and comes to me rather than medical, you’d better be thankful that papa makes housecalls. I’m fine, it’s just a bad cold. It will go away and it will be fine, I just have to beat it, is all.”

 

“Yup,  _ medicine  _ usually works.” James commented. Q glared up at him and James chuckled, kissing him gently on the forehead. “Just take care of yourself, medicine or not, okay? I need my Quartermaster in top shape for me.”

 

“And why is that?”

 

“To keep an eye on me and to slap my wrist when I do something stupid. But to also kiss me when I get home.”

 

“Is that all I’m good for these days?” Q asked teasingly.

 

“You’re good at everything, that’s why I keep you around.”

 

“Well, I’m not good at heavy lifting, that’s why I keep you around. Besides, if I let you out of my sight everyone and their brother, sister, and mother-in-law would be trying to steal you away. Someone has to be around here to keep me sane and move the sofa when it needs to be moved.”

 

“Moving sofas is what made me a hero, you know?” James snorted.

 

“Yup.” Q nodded, just as sarcastic.

 

“It should be a simple, in-and-out thing. I’ll see you in a few days, that means you need to remember to eat and sleep twice as much as you normally do, because if I have to come home to a grumpy and sick Quartermaster neither of us are going to have much fun.”

 

“You don’t have to convince me to sleep, I feel exhausted. M’s lucky I even attempt to get a full shift in. I may take the day off tomorrow, just to pass out.”

 

“That might do you some good.” James nodded.

 

“Well, here’s your kit, do try to return it all in one piece, that includes you as always.” Q smiled up at him. “Stay safe, Bond.”

 

“Get well, Mr. Bond.” James smiled and pressed a gentle kiss to Q’s lips. “Don’t think I won’t have Alec come here and drag you home if I think you’re too sick to work. It’s a miracle I haven’t done it already. You look awful.”

 

“That’s great for my ego, honey, thanks.” Q rolled his eyes.

 

“Horrible in a sick way, Q.” James shook his head.

 

“Even better.” Q sighed, then paused. “I love you.” James froze for a second. ‘Stay safe’ was usually their way of saying ‘I love you’ to each other before a mission. Q would tell him to be safe and James would promise to do so. It was their way of admitting their love while being a bit private about it. They didn’t actually say it often anyway. It was something they didn’t want to be said too often, they wanted it to be something special. James wondered what exactly made Q choose that moment to say it, not seeing what Q saw.

 

“I love you too.” James smiled regardless. “I’ll be home soon.”

 

“Have a good mission, 007.” Q nodded and James left Q’s office, taking his kit with him.

 

800Q8

 

Q, as it turned out, was sent to medical by a very adament R eight hours later, only to find that he’d managed to get double pneumonia and was sent home with drugs and an inhaler. Q tried to insisted that he didn’t actually feel that bad, but everyone knew he was lying, so Alec escorted Q home and sent James a text to let him know Q had finally gotten looked at.

 

Q got a text from James a few moments later.  _ Get some rest. Stay off your feet. I’ll spoil you when I get home if you’re good. _

 

At least James knew how to bargain with Q. Q sighed and promised he would before climbing into bed. “Get some sleep, kiddo.” Alec smiled. 

 

“I’m almost thirty-two, not a kid.”

 

“You look fifteen still, haven’t changed a bit.”

 

“Either way you don’t have to worry about me sleeping. I’m exhausted. I may not wake up for a month or two.”

 

“Hey! You may be caught up on this last year’s sleep then.” Alec teased. 

 

“Sleeping is easier when there isn’t an idiot blabbering away. And you and R can stop teaming up against me, honestly, it’s tedious.”

 

“Someone has to look after you when James isn’t home, you’d run yourself ragged. Goodnight, bof. I’ll lock up on my way out.”

 

“Thanks, Alec.”

 

“No problem.” Alec nodded, leaving Q alone to fall into a deep sleep.

 

800Q8

 

James opened the door and slowly stepped through, his eyes met Ronson and he rushed forward. “Ronson’s down. R, send medical evac, now.”

 

_ “Got it, 007. Five minutes.” _

 

_ “Is it there?”  _ M asked. James looked at the laptop and shook his head before putting pressure on Ronson’s wound.

 

“Hard drive’s gone.”

 

_ “Are you sure?” _

 

“It’s gone, give me a minute.” James nodded. Ronson managed a stupid half-smile.

 

“This settles it, Q can never get sick.” Ronson coughed.

 

“I’ll make sure he’s better for your next mission.” James smiled and Ronson smiled back, more genuinely. 

 

“ _ They must have it, get after them _ .” M insisted.

 

“I’m stabilizing Ronson.”

 

_ “We don’t have the time.” _

 

“I have to stop the bleeding.” James insisted.

 

_ “Leave him _ !”

 

James looked up at Ronson and Ronson barely moved his arm, pressing it down on his wound himself. He nodded at James and looked at the door. James nodded back and got up, drawing his gun, ready to begin the chase.

 

800Q8

 

Q was going to be fucking pissed when he found out James had been shot, again. He always hated it, especially when he wasn’t the handler. He hated not being given a chance to prevent such things. At least it wasn’t all that awful, not deep, thanks to some really thick glass. 

 

James fought the man trying to pull the information off of his neck, but the man managed to grab him around the neck. His grip struggled for a second and James saw rather than felt the dog tags Q had made him fall to the train and slide off. That bastard. James fought back, managing to dislodge the hand around his throat and continue fighting. The chatting in his head was annoying and not the best of news either.

 

“ _ There’s a tunnel up ahead, I’m going to lose him.”  _ The other agent shouldn’t have worried, he just needed one more minute.

 

_ “Can you get into a better position?” _

 

_ “Negative, there’s no time.” _

 

_ “Take the shot.”  _ M said. James nearly shouted at her. Jesus he needed five more seconds.  _ “I said take the shot.” _

 

_ “I can’t, I might hit Bond.” _

 

James almost had it off of the man’s neck.

 

_ “Take the bloody shot.” _

 

Pain seared in his shoulder as he fell. He felt betrayal in a way he’d never felt it before. Then all he could think about was Q. Q was going to be told he’d died, and he likely would, such a fall was too far. James couldn’t stand the idea of it. Q alone. Q sad. Q would be heartbroken. Who would look after Q when James left? Who would remind him he was beautiful and loved when bad days struck? Who would kiss him goodnight? Who would know just by a glance when he was really stressed and hurt?

 

James didn’t hate the idea of someone else loving Q. He hated the fact that he knew Q wouldn’t let anyone else in. Q had always insisted that Holmes’ only fell in love once, knowing perfection when they saw it and never settling for anything less. James prayed Q would be alright, that Q would be happy.

 

James closed his eyes, trying not to feel the wind on his face. Instead he focused on the feel of Q’s skin. The color of his eyes. The texture of his hair. The sound of his voice…

 

_ I love you, Hamish. Be safe. Be happy. _

 

James hit the water that was as cold as ice and as hard as cement.

 

Everything went black.

 

“Agent down.” Eve said at the top of the hill, watching the enemy get away, too shocked to try to take another shot.

 

800Q8

 

“R, are there any vitals?” Tanner asked.

 

“No, he’s gone. I have absolutely nothing for him. He’s dead. He’s dead. Oh God, Q.” R covered her mouth as tears began to fall down her cheeks. “I didn’t mean it. I should have… I could have…”

 

“Sh, it’s not your fault.” Tanner promised.

 

“What about Q, though? This will kill him.”

 

“I’ll go talk to him.”

 

“No, not alone, Tanner.” Alec said. “I’m coming with you.” He nodded before turning to R. “Are you sure? 210% sure?” R nodded and gestured to the large screen. No heart rate, nothing. James had existed and now he didn’t. “Okay…” Alec nodded and pulled R into a hug. “It’s not your fault, alright? I’ll be back.” He promised, kissing her cheek, feeling a bit numb. His best friend was dead. He knew it would happen one day, but it didn’t make it easier and he certainly never wanted to have to tell Q that James was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	45. Killed in Action

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q finds out James is dead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short and not sweet.

Q woke and sat up coughing. He blinked around and heard the knock on his door again. He put his glasses on and slowly got up, making his way down the stairs. He looked at the screen next to the door before opening it. “I don’t need to be babysat, you two. I was sleeping just fine. See? I’m actually following doctor’s orders.”

 

“Q…” Tanner started.

 

“What is it?” Q asked a little sharper. “Has something happened? What do you need me to fix? Is everyone alright on their missions? 001 was in a tricky place. They’re alright, right? Do I need to salvage a mission or something?” Q wondered.

 

“May we come in?”

 

“Sure. What’s going on?” Q asked as he closed the door behind them.

 

“Q… James is dead.”

 

“No he isn’t.” Q shook his head. “He’s probably just gone off mission again. He does that. You of all people know that Alec.”

 

“Q, his tracker went dead.” Tanner insisted.

 

“There are numerous ways that can happen.” Alec grabbed Q’s shoulder gently and Q froze, looking up at Alec. This wasn’t just a normal disappearing act, was it?

 

“Q, he was shot off of the top of a train in Istanbul. He fell nearly a hundred feet into water when his tracker went dead. I’m sorry, Q, but even I don’t know how he could survive that. Q, he’s gone.” Tears glossed over Q’s eyes and then his face hardened and he stepped out of Alec’s hold. 

 

“No. He’s not dead. He promised he’d be safe. He promised me. He’ll be fine. He always is. I mean he’s come back to life more times than my father and in worse situations. He promised me he’d be fine and he’d never break a promise to me.”

 

“Q sometimes we can’t keep all of our promises.”

 

“He can. He’ll come back after some fashion half-way across the world.”

 

“Q…” Tanner sighed.

 

“He’s been through worse and come home. He’ll be fine.”

 

Alec saw it, saw both how Q believed the man could still come home and how Q wanted and needed to believe that James would come home. Alec stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Q. “Then we’ll wait for him, even if no one else does.”

 

“But...what do I do if he doesn’t?” Q asked after a shocked second. He clung to Alec as tears ran from his eyes.

 

“You do what he’d want you to do.” Alec said, holding the man close, needing the hug almost as much as Q did. Q couldn’t breathe, he didn’t know how to make his lungs work and they wouldn’t have been able to draw enough breath anyway. He slowly pulled himself together and stepped back.

  
“He’ll call, you know? He always does when he goes off mission. He promised, to always let me know he was safe. So, as soon as he can get ahold of a burner he’ll call me. May take a day or two, but he always calls or texts at least.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	46. Delayed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A funeral, a call.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own anything, also references.

Q managed to get through the funeral without crying. They waited a week out of respect for the boffin before having it. It was a private thing and no announcement was made in the papers, one couldn’t be made until later, to protect MI6. Q stood in front of the grave and John tried to reach out for him, but he’d sent his father away. Sherlock, however, simply stood next to him, not saying a word and not trying to comfort him. They thought alike and they knew they’d react the exact same way at the death of a loved one.

 

“He’ll come back. I know he will. He wouldn’t have had to go to all this trouble though. If I’d just gone to medical like he’d asked me to those days before I may have been well enough to be his handler. It would have made it easier.”

 

“Statistically speaking,” Mycroft started. “Since he was shot and fell so far, he likely has wounds.”

 

“Mm, yes, that means he’d have to spend some time healing and lying low. He may not have gotten the chance to get to a phone just yet.” Sherlock nodded.

 

“Thank you.”

 

“We’re just thinking logically, nothing you need to thank us for.” Mycroft shrugged before he strode off, leaving Q alone with his father.

 

“Besides, coming from someone who’s come back from the dead, sometimes you need a bit of time.” Sherlock kissed Q’s temple and left Q alone. Q stood only for a few more moments.

 

“You’re not here, it’s just an empty box. I don’t want an empty box. Come home. I need you at home.” Q nodded and left.

 

800Q8

 

Q didn’t look at the video. He didn’t need to see it. Eve Moneypenny had apologized profusely, but Q had forgiven her, she’d only been doing her job. Q didn’t try to pack away James’ things. Q didn’t cry, didn’t get angry. He stayed calm and hopeful, but his hope was beginning to fade after two weeks without a word from a man who could be dead.

 

800Q8

 

“Is 002 finally in the hotel?” Tanner asked.

 

“Yes, no more target practice for now. Everything’s calm.” Q nodded.

 

“How are you?” Tanner asked gently.

 

“Better if people would stop asking me that.” Q sighed. “Look, I have double-os in the field, a whole list of active agents missing that hasn’t shown up anywhere, and I have things to be working on in R&D so it would be really nice if people would let me do my job like I’m supposed to. I have a whole branch who’s afraid to talk to me and ask for things. I have a second in command who can’t even make eye contact with me. All the higher-ups are tiptoeing around me like they’re the damn people who pulled the trigger. The only people I know who are acting remotely right with me are the double-os. I would appreciate it if I could add someone else to that list.”

 

“I just want to make sure you’re taking care of yourself. I don’t want you working too hard.”

 

“I’m not. I’m fine.”

 

“You’re not, Q.” Tanner sighed. “You can still take that time off, for bereavement.”

 

“If you can give me a body to put in that empty box, I’ll take the time. Until then, I need things to be normal.” 

 

“There are more balanced ways of doing this. I should have you sent to psych.”

 

“Send me. When I’m through with that department you’ll need new shrinks. I know more than you think I do and I could very easily shatter everyone in that damn department. I don’t need a psych eval. I am alright, I just need people like you to stop walking in here every five seconds asking me how I feel about my dead husband. I’m doing fine, just  _ leave me alone _ .” Q felt very much like his father in that moment. He winced and packed his bag and put it over his shoulder. “Now if you’ll excuse me. I need to visit Ronson in medical and then I need to go home. My uncle thought it was wise to get me two cats for some odd reason.”

 

“Q…”

 

“I’m just going to visit him, then I’m going home. Any questions, dad?”

 

“No...have a nice night.”

 

“Thank you.” Q sighed and left his office, heading for medical. He knocked on the door and stepped into the room.

 

“Q, you’re back.”

 

“It’s my job to look out for my agents. How are you feeling, Eli?” Q asked, pulling a package out of his bag and setting it on the table.

 

“Good. You look tired.”

 

“I never sleep well when James is away.” Even the dog tags weren’t working, sometimes just the sound of them clinking were enough to sooth him. They didn’t work anymore.

 

Ronson wisely avoided making a comment that James wasn’t just ‘away’. “Are those the candies I was talking about?”

 

“I had to have it shipped in. Could you pick a more common candy?”

 

“No! These are the best.” Ronson said, wincing as he took one out of the package and popped it into his mouth. “Perfection. Thank you, Q.”

 

“No problem. Do you need anything?”

 

“You know you really do go beyond the call of duty.”

 

“I don’t think so. I just think everyone else is desensitized and they try to protect their hearts by hiding them. A friend… Do you remember Tiago Rodriguez?”

 

“Vaguely.”

 

“He was my best friend, and the first agent I lost. He told me that I needed to keep my heart because others couldn’t afford it. I just try to use all I can to keep people feeling safe and sane and cared for, even if the world’s crumbling.”

 

“You didn’t lose him, that would imply that you had the ability to change anything.”

 

“True…”

 

“You know you have the best record of bringing agents home in the history of MI6, right? Your save rate is in the nineties, that’s unheard of.”

 

“You agents know as well as I do that I worry more about the ten percent than the ninety.” Q sighed. “Well, I’ll see you again soon. I think my home is being destroyed by two maniac monsters the rest of the world calls kittens. I swear, they scratch everything.”

 

“Good luck with that.”

 

“I’ll need it.” Q nodded, heading for the door.

 

Q decided not to take the tube home. He also decided against the cabs in favor of walking the four miles back to the house. He pulled the coat he’d stolen from James long ago tighter around himself. The coat was worn and old, but well tended to. Q made sure it stayed well taken care of in spite of its age. As he neared the bridge he felt his phone vibrate. He sighed, knowing it was probably a higher up who’d spotted him walking and wanted to scream at him for ‘putting his own life at risk’.

 

It was a text.

 

_ Death cannot stop true love, Buttercup, it can only delay it for a while. _

 

Q stopped breathing and his body went numb. His phone slipped through his fingers and hit the ground. Only one person quoted The Princess Bride at him, only one person had the audacity to call him ‘Buttercup’ of all damn things. Tears ran down Q’s cheeks as his heart began to pound. He collapsed on the sidewalk and grabbed at his phone, scooping it up and typing as quickly as he could.

 

_ I need your voice.  _ Q waited with his breath still caught in his throat. The phone vibrated again and he answered it, shakily putting it up to his ear.

 

“ _ As you wish.”  _ The voice was gruff and worn, but it was James. It was James.

 

“James.” Q breathed, beginning to sob in relief and unable to stop sobbing. “James, thank Christ. Are you okay? Where are you?”

 

“ _ Sh, I’m fine, I promise you I’m fine, been better, but I’m alive. Please don’t cry. _ ”

 

“They all thought you were dead. I had hoped you weren’t, I didn’t believe you were dead, but it was weeks and I actually started to think… God James, I love you. You know I love you, don’t you?”

 

_ “I know, I know, Hamish. I love you too. Sorry it took so long, been trying to mend. I’ve mostly been unconscious for most of this time, just got to a phone. _ ”

 

“I don’t care, as long as you’re alright.”

 

“ _ Bullet in the shoulder and I drowned a bit, but I’m fine now, tired.” _

 

“Are you coming home?”

 

There was silence on the other end of the line.

 

“James?”

 

“ _ I don’t mean to sound...awful, but I need some time. Things… They’re complicated and I need a bit.” _

 

“Okay.” Q desperately wanted him to come home, but he could understand needing time after nearly dying. It wasn’t the first time James had asked for time.

 

_ “Hamish, this isn’t about you, I just...can’t come back to MI6 right now. If it were just you I’d already be home but...well, you know what happened.” _

 

“What do you mean?”

 

_ “You didn’t watch my mission?” _

 

“I was too afraid.”

 

_ “Hamish...I almost had it done, but M lost faith in me and ordered that...what’s-her-face to take an unclean shot. I’m having issues trusting the system right now.” _

 

“M ordered you shot.” Q said slowly. “That explains why she’s so different.”

 

_ “Look I know the reasoning behind it, but it still doesn’t comfort me any. I just need time to get through it.” _

 

“Promise me you’ll stay in contact, a call, text, anything. I don’t care that you need time, just, make sure I know you’re okay.”

 

_ “I promise. God, Hamish, I’ve missed hearing your voice. I thought I’d never hear it again.” _

 

“I missed you too, so much.” Q sobbed in relief, leaning his back against the railing of the bridge.

 

“ _ Are you sure you’re alright? I can come home.” _

 

“I’m fine, I’m just… I was just so scared, but I’m okay. Take your time, I know you need it.”

 

_ “Please don’t tell anyone I’m alive.” _

 

“I won’t. Just you and me.” Q nodded. “Come back to me when you can.”

 

_ “You sound like you’re feeling better.” _

 

“You’re worried about me being sick and you just came back from the dead, that’s typical.”

 

_ “I always worry about you. You sound tired though, you should sleep more.” _

 

“Trust me, I think I’ll sleep perfectly fine tonight, knowing you’re safe.”

 

_ “I love you.” _

  
“I love you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much love.


	47. Kaboom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The bomb brings James home to a demolished Q-branch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Boom.

James hated that Q was still alone. He’d sounded so broken up on the phone, but James wasn’t ready to go back. The people he’d given his life for several times had cut him loose in a second. It was all part of the game, he realized, but certainly they had to trust him more than that? Had Q been there things would have been done differently. Was it only because of Q that they still had faith in him? Did they think him washed up?

 

James was just glad Q seemed alright with him taking some time. James would seriously have to thank the man for his patience. As it was James made it a point to communicate with Q every day, whether it was talking to the man until he fell asleep or texting him to make sure Q knew he was still alright. Q seemed better knowing that James was okay, so James hoped he could take a few more days doing nothing but think and drink. James always felt bad drinking in front of Q, he didn’t want Q to have to deal with a drunk version of himself. He couldn’t work through the past either with Q around. If he went home he knew he’d be able to focus only on Q, and he couldn’t wait to be able to focus just on Q, but he couldn’t take this baggage home to Q.

 

James slowly walked into the bar and sat down, pulling up a bottle, glancing up at the TV as he poured himself a glass. Putting the bottle down.

 

“Emergency crews are still attempting to assess the damage as investigators hunt for leads

in what now appears to be a major terrorist attack in the heart of London. No-one has yet claimed responsibility for what sources are calling a possible "cyber-terrorist assault" on the British Secret Service. Early reports from the scene indicate at least six dead, many more injured, with victims being evacuated to local hospitals within minutes of the explosion.”

 

James dropped the glass in his hands. “Q.” If it was a cyber assault Q would have been fighting back, in his office...right below the point of the explosion, judging by the video of the building. “No, no, no.” James dropped money on the counter and ran, pulling out his phone. There were six dead. Six. Q could have been one. “Come on Q, pick up.” 

 

Q didn’t pick up.

 

800Q8

 

“Mallory, nice to see you again, new office.” Q nodded, shaking Mallory’s hand.

 

“Yes, new office.”

 

“Must be nice to get out of that musty club.” Q said, sitting across from the man. “What can I do for you?”

 

“You’ll have seen that I have a meeting with M shortly.”

 

“I do make it a point to know everyone’s business, especially when they’re on the list of people that I need to protect. I’m like Mycroft in that manner. I suspect your meeting with her will not go well. Trying to tell her to retire will not go over well.”

 

“But you agree, yes?”

 

“She is very good at her job, however, logically speaking she has gone past her time, I believe. She’s made twenty percent more mistakes in the past six months than she has even at the lowest point in her career. Don’t think me biased though just because she had my husband shot off of a train.”

 

“My condolences, by the way.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

“Are you doing well? Mycroft seemed concerned.”

 

“He’s always concerned… I’m doing my best. Working helps. It gives me focus.”

 

“I just wanted you informed of what we have planned. I know you practically hold all of MI6 together and you’re going to be needed if anything is going to transition easily.”

 

“Yes, I do believe Mycroft intends for you to take the title of M.” Mallory’s eyes widened. “Ah, you don’t know yet, sorry, I read a bit too far on that one. Mycroft’s been sending me cryptic little hints for months. I feel the missing hard drive only spurred this movement forward. She’s a good leader, though not without flaws.”

 

“Yes, the flaws have become slightly too many to overlook now.”

 

“I understand, I’ll help with the transition in anyway I can. However, it may help you to know that people will not be alright with you at first. They will second guess you and, quite frankly, they trust me. They’ll come to me before they come to you, chain of command or not. It will take time for them to adjust. Hell, even with M now they come to me before her with most things.”

 

“Well, someone has to be the backbone of the organization and I’ve learned that’s usually a Holmes.” Mallory scoffed. 

 

“I’ll make sure they listen to you too though, it’ll just take time.” Q nodded. “May I go? I think Mycroft is loitering  somewhere in the building and it’s my life’s work to give him hell.”

 

“We’re done. I look forward to working with you. I hear you’re as sane as a Holmes gets.”

 

“I am. Have a good day, Mallory.” Q smiled and got up, leaving the room and seeking out his uncle, finding him leaning against his umbrella, waiting.

 

“Hello, Q, how was your meeting?”

 

“Relaxed, I think he likes me more than he likes you.”

 

“Hardly a personality contest.”

 

“He also seemed to respect me more, probably on the grounds that I’m smarter.”

 

“Watch your tone, Q.” Mycroft raised an eyebrow. “Words like that could get you in trouble.”

 

“Really? I was under the assumption that I had the power here, considering what happened the last time you started a war against me.”

 

“That has nothing to do with general brains.”

 

“You’re jealous, admit it. You never do like it when someone one-ups you.” Q sighed, spotting M walking to the meeting. “She’s not going to take this well.”

 

“No, likely not. She was good at her job, too many mistakes though and…”

 

“Do you ever wonder when we’ll start slipping that much?” Q asked. His uncle was into his sixties, still brilliant, though his hair was grey rather than red. Both of his parents were in their fifties and still running all around London, Sherlock’s hair was actually still almost completely dark, only a few strands of silver giving his age away. Even his grandmother was still a bit of an eccentric genius, nearly at ninety years old.

 

“Hopefully the day after we die. I don’t think we’d survive such simplicity.”

 

“You’re right. How’s grandfather?” Q asked quietly. With the mess around James and MI6 in general Q hadn’t had the chance to ask after him.

 

“He’s better, though I wouldn’t hold out too much hope. He gets sick so easily these days.”

 

“It’s a-” An alarm on Q’s phone began to scream. “Mother fucker.” Q snapped pulling his phone out of his pocket and looking down at it. “I need a car to MI6 now, it’s under attack. I need to be on site for this one, they have some serious skills. We have to go quickly.” Q said, already heading for the door.

 

“I’ll get you there.” Mycroft promised, moving behind him.

 

800Q8

 

“Q?!” James shouted into their house. “Hamish?”

 

“James?” Q appeared at the top of the stairs. “JAMES!” Q ran down them and wrapped his arms around James’ body, pressing kisses everywhere he could reach. “You’re home…”

 

“Are you alright?” James demanded, pushing Q back by his shoulders, looking him up and down. “MI6…”

 

“I wasn’t there. I tried to get there to stop it, but...whoever did it was a genius, they even had road blocks up to stop me. They wanted me and/or M to see it, I don’t know why, but they wanted us to see it.”

 

“That means they know who you are.”

 

“Yeah, that crossed my mind. There aren’t people who know about me… I don’t know. I am just fucking pissed they got six of my people killed. And R’s in the hospital with burns. James, I’m glad you’re home; I don’t think I could have dealt with this alone.”

 

“You don’t have to be alone. I’m here.” James promised, pulling Q close. “I’m sorry I stayed away. I should have come home. I’ve missed you so much.” He whispered before pulling Q into a proper kiss, a kiss full of passion and love. A reunion, a joyful, blissful, reunion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I'm evil.  
> Much Love.


	48. Tests

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James is back.

“Where the hell have you been?” M demanded, glaring at him.

 

“Enjoying death.” James commented, dryly, he definitely needed a drink for this conversation.

 

“Why didn't you call?”

 

“You didn't get the postcard? You should try it some time. Get away from it all. It really lends perspective.”

 

“Q mourned you. And here you are.”

 

“Q is my business, but if you have to be in our affairs, I’ve already been home. Made up, made love and everything. He’s known I was alive since I was well enough to tell him.”

 

“Run out of drink where you were, then?”

 

“What was it you said? ‘Take the bloody shot.’” James demanded.

 

“I made a judgment call.”

 

“You should have trusted me to finish the job.”

 

“It was the possibility of losing you or the certainty of losing all those other agents. I made the only decision I could and you know it.”

 

“I think you lost your nerve.” No one else had even considered making that order. They’d all trusted James to get it done, but M hadn’t.

 

“What do you expect, a bloody apology? You know the rules of the game. You've been playing it long enough. We both have.”

 

“Maybe too long.” James sighed. Maybe it had been too long. Maybe he should retire, finally get to stay home with Q, focus on making sure he never cried over him again. James knew for certain he’d never want to see Q so broken up over him again. Maybe it was time for M to go too.

 

“Speak for yourself.”

 

“Ronson didn't make it, did he? Q didn’t say.”

 

“He did, thanks to a few of Q’s protocols. He apparently has a system in place to get medical on site faster, don’t know how he worked it out, but R had it in hand following whatever he does.”

 

Q was a genius, there was no way around it. He still looked sixteen, he could work longer and harder than everyone else, and his mind had only gotten sharper with age. Quite the opposite of what most could claim. “So this is it. We're both played out.”

 

“Well, if you believe that, why did you come back? You could have just snagged Q and left, he would have followed you.”

 

“Good question.”

 

“Because we're under attack. And you know we need you.”

 

“Well, I'm here.”

 

“You'll have to be debriefed and declared fit for active service. You can only return to duty when you've passed the tests, so take them seriously.”

 

“Always do.” James rolled his eyes. “Goodnight M.”

 

800Q8

 

“The assailant hacked into the environmental control system, locked out the safety protocols and turned on the gas, all of which should have been impossible.” Tanner told James as they rode toward the new MI6.

 

“I’m still trying to figure out how the bastard did it. Genius, but still a bastard.” Q frowned. “On top of that, they hacked into our files. They knew her appointments as well as my own, knew she'd be out of the building. They weren't targeting us.”

 

“They wanted one or both of you to see it.” James commented.

 

“Unfortunately. Perhaps the plan counted on me being out of the building. I looked over the attack and had I been there I’m sure I could have stopped it.”

 

“No one blames you, Q.” Tanner soothed.

 

“I do, I’m the best. I need to do better.” James frowned and squeezed Q’s hand gently. Tanner didn’t mention the contact at all.

 

“Where are we, Tanner?” James inquired as they came to a stop underground and got out..

 

“New digs. The old building was declared ‘strategically vulnerable’.” Tanner rolled his eyes. 

  
“That's putting it mildly.”

 

“Yeah, considering my desk was a story below where it started.”  James squeezed Q’s hand tighter, he could have lost Q that day. He was so glad he hadn’t.

 

“He was able to breach the most secure computer system in Britain.”

 

“The world, actually.” Q corrected. “So we're on war footing now. Speaking of, I need to go fight this war. I’ll see you soon. Do take the tests seriously, 007.” Q smiled faintly and kissed James before he left, heading for the new Q-branch.

 

800Q8

 

“Q?” James asked, walking into the new Q-branch.

 

“Ah, 007, I saw your psych eval.”

 

“And?”

 

“Impressed, it seems you actually did say the first thing that popped into your head for once. You called M a bitch for one thing and I believe your word for me was trust?”

 

“Yes…”

 

“It’s sweet of you.” Q smiled before tossing a folder onto a minion’s desk. He pressed a kiss to James’ cheek. It wasn’t exactly normal for Q to show affection at work, but his minions let it slide considering both of the parties involved in the relationship had nearly died within a month.

 

“And my other tests?”

 

“Fitness looked alright, but it could be better, I’m assuming the bullet festered a bit.” James held up a bag with shrapnel in it. “You ripped it out of your own body, didn’t you?” Q asked in a put out voice.

 

“Maybe.”

 

“I really hate you right now, Bond.”

 

“No, you love me.”

 

“Get out of my branch, idiot. I’ll run some tests. M and Mallory are waiting for you.” Q looked down but James grabbed his arm and pulled Q away from everyone else, close to a wall. 

 

“Q?”

 

“Yes, James?” Q whispered, knowing James had become quite serious.

 

“You promised me you’d tell me if I wasn’t good for this anymore, you promised me.”

 

“Yes, I did.”

 

“I know I didn’t do great, Q. I mean my range scores alone…” Q shook his head and cupped James’ face in his hand.

 

“I promise you, I’ll be the first to know when you can’t do this anymore. You can do this. You still have it in you, you are just having a hard time seeing it right now. It’s not your body, it’s not your mind, you’re just as sharp and skilled as ever...it’s fear. Once you get past that, once you get back into it again, I know you’ll be perfect.”

 

“You sure?”

 

“I’d never lie to you, James.” Q pressed a kiss to his lips. “Now, I have to go...save the world and all. Go to your meeting and please behave, Bond.” Q smiled and walked away.

 

Right...behave. He was trying to do that as he watched Q travel between rooms, keeping his eyes over the progress of some of his minions while working quite diligently on analyzing the bullet fragments, all while guiding 002 through a mission in South America. In the middle of it all a familiar face greeted him. “She’s ready for you.”

 

“I’m sorry,” James smirked, “have we met before?”

 

“I’m the one who should say ‘sorry’.” James softened his smile as he stood up.

 

“It was only four ribs, some of the less vital organs...nothing major.” James promised as they started walking together. “Not enough excitement in Istanbul?” James asked casually.

 

“I’ve been reassigned, temporary suspension from field work.”

 

“Really?”

 

“Yes, something to do with killing 007.”

 

“You gave it your best shot.”

 

“That was hardly my best shot.” Eve scoffed.

 

“Then I don’t think I can survive your best. It was M wasn’t it?” James asked.

 

“Yes, how do you know that?” Eve paused and looked at him.

 

“If it had been Q you would have been suspended from life itself. He can be ruthless on occasion.”

 

“I really am sorry, I know I shot you and I really worried him. I’m sorry for that.”

 

“He forgave you, forgive yourself.” James smiled. “And, if they ever do let you back out there, warn me first.”

 

“I’m assisting Gareth Mallory in the transition and then I’ll be back in the field.”

 

“And that’s what you want?” James asked, looking her up and down. It had nothing to do with her skills, but he could see it in her personality and in the way she dealt with shooting him, she would regret staying in the field with her heart.

 

“Yes, of course.”

 

“It’s not for everyone.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Q could go out in the field, I’ve seen him do it. He may look small, but he could bring countries down and not just with his laptop.” It was the Watson in Q, he looked cuddly, but he packed a punch. “He could be a double-o, but he isn’t. Just...think on what you really want to do, I don’t want you regretting anything.”

  
“007?” James nodded at the woman and stepped into M’s office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much love.


	49. Passed the Test

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James didn't pass the tests.
> 
> Not like that matters.

Passed the Test

 

“The whole office goes up in smoke and that bloody thing survives.” James glared at the bulldog.

 

“Your interior decorating tips have always been appreciated, 007.” M commented, putting down her files as a man entered the room. James stood and looked at him, they’d met, briefly a few times, thanks to Q’s uncle Mycroft. “007, this is”

 

“Gareth Mallory,” James extended a hand and the man shook it with a nod.

 

“I hope I haven’t missed anything, the PM does prattle on in a crisis.” Mallory said as they both sat down.

 

M glanced down at her files for James. He’d failed every part of his test, some by a few points some by a massive number of points. Psych didn’t want him to go anywhere except for in a padded room until he calmed down, but it was the note at the end from Q that mattered the most to M:  _ Don’t listen to the scores he’s ready.  _ “I’ve just been reviewing Bond’s tests. It seems you’ve passed, by the skin of your teeth. You’re back on active service.”

 

“Congratulations are in order, impressive for a man with a gravestone.” Mallory nodded.

 

“Thank you, it apparently is a trait that runs through extended family.” James said, standing up. “I’ll just wait outside.” He nodded, noticing the two had some sort of discussion they needed to have.

 

“Just one question? Why not stay dead. You had the perfect way out. Go and live quietly. Not many field agents get to leave this cleanly. You don’t need to be an operative to see the obvious, it’s a young man’s game.” James twitched slightly, the words striking a cord. “Look, you’ve been seriously injured. There’s no shame in saying you’ve lost a step. The only shame would be not admitting it until it’s too late. It would devastate Q, I was at your funeral, after all. Mycroft talks too, on occasion, more than he did as a younger man.”

 

“Hire me or fire me. It’s entirely up to you.”

 

“If he says he’s ready, he’s ready.” M defended.

 

“Maybe you can’t see it or maybe you won’t.”

 

“What  _ exactly  _ are you implying.”

 

“You’re sentimental about him and so is Q.”

 

“As long as I’m head of this department, I’ll choose my own operatives. You’ll do well to trust Q’s judgement as well.” M snapped, standing up.

 

“Fair enough.” Mallory nodded, turning to James. “Good luck, 007. Try not to cock it up.” Mallory said, leaving the room. Tanner winced as he looked around at the two left in the room.

 

“That went well.” Tanner sighed.

 

“Not really.” M shook her head. Q knocked on the door and M waved him in.

 

“Yes it’s the bloody door on the right…” Q held up a finger to M as he turned Tanner’s laptop, typing as he ran a mission. “Yes, I’m right… No I’m not looking at the blueprints right now… I have fucking perfect memory, I don’t care what your gut says, it’s wrong… I will send an electrical shock through your gun if you don’t just listen to me. See? I told you so. I don’t know why you find it amusing to test me like this, even after all these damn years. Now R’s going to have you for a moment, yes, because I’m busy...No! not that kind of busy, stop it.” Q blushed before he turned off his earpiece, and shook his head.

 

“And professionalism has died.” Tanner sighed.

 

“Don’t even.” Q raised an eyebrow at Tanner.

 

“Point made.” Tanner conceded.

 

“I’ve analyzed the shrapnel fragments. You’re lucky to be alive, had it been a direct hit it would have cut you in half. It’s a highly specialized bullet and I have traced it to a few people, I need you to identify this bastard for me.” 

 

“Q-”

 

“He shot my husband I can call him a bastard.” Q said, turning the screen to James. James pointed to a man and Q nodded. “Thought so, fit the MO. Patrice, he’s a ghost, but I’m amazing at finding ghosts, that and the CIA are tracking him, which means I don’t have to do work, I just have to hack the CIA.”

 

“Q don’t do” M started.

 

“Already done.” Q smiled at her. “Shanghai is where he’ll be, two days time. I have also just booked you a fight and a room.”

 

“I love you.” James smiled, putting a hand on Q’s shoulder and squeezing gently. They never acted like that in public, one too many brushes with death in a short span had them a little frazzled.

 

“Soldiers always love having a pet genius, I’ve found. If you’re going to do that please rub my neck, it’s killing me. I swear there is a knot that won’t come out.” James gently began to rub the offending spot and Q turned into putty as he continued to work.

 

“Shanghai?” M asked, wisely turning a blind eye to the PDA. 

 

“Yes, ma’am.” Q agreed, typing something further on the computer before sliding it to Tanner, not moving from under James’ soothing hand.

 

“You’re to go and await further instructions. If he turns up, he’s yours. Find out who he works for and who has the list. Then terminate him, for both you and Ronson.”

 

“And me, Bond.” Q added.

 

“With pleasure.”

 

“Is there anything else you want to tell me?” M asked.

 

“No.” James shook his head.

 

“Q, take him to your branch, get him outfitted.”

 

“Yes, ma’am.” Q nodded as he and James left the office.

 

“I didn’t know Bond passed the tests.” Tanner said slowly, looking at M.

 

“He didn’t.”

 

“Then why are we sending him out?”

 

“Q said he was ready. Q’s never been wrong, not yet.”

 

“True…”

 

800Q8

 

“I didn’t pass those tests.” James said to Q as they walked.

 

“No, not all of them.” James hadn’t actually passed any of them, but Q didn’t tell him that.

 

“Then why?” James asked. Q whirled around and pulled James into an abrupt kiss, consuming and loving.

 

“Because those tests aren’t the right measurement for you. Look at me, I made you a promise. I swore to tell you when you lost it. You haven’t lost it. You’re just getting started.” Q smiled and kissed him one more time, gently. “Do you trust me?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Then let’s do this and if you don’t feel like you came back one-hundred percent at the end of this, you don’t have to keep going. I just want you to see that you can still do what you love: protect all of us.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

“I love you, now come on, you need a gun on you, it makes you twice as sexy.”

 

“Does it?”

  
“Hell yes, it does.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much love.


	50. The Man Behind the Bomb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James learns exactly who blew up MI6.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enter Silva.

The Man Behind the Bomb

 

“I’m heading for an island tomorrow, you might lose me for a while.” James warned.

 

“ _ Understood.”  _ R answered. “ _ We’ll still be able to track you and monitor you even if we can’t talk, use your radio if need be. _ ”

 

“How is he?” James asked quietly.

 

“ _ Hasn’t slept in days, when the names were released he went through hell and back to save everyone. If it weren’t for him we’d have five dead and World War III brewing. When he finally sees the last agent land safely I’ll make sure he goes home and sleeps _ .”

 

“Thank you.”

 

“ _ Yup. _ ” R answered. “ _ Get some sleep yourself. R out _ .”

 

800Q8

 

“ They abandoned it almost overnight.He made them think there was a leak at the chemical plant.It's amazing the panic you can cause with a single computer.” Severine whispered to James. James knew exactly how much damage could be done with a computer, he had watched Q bring down countries with them, blow up whole cities with them. James knew how dangerous that could be. “He wanted the island, so he took it.”

 

“Does he always get what he wants?”

 

“More than you know.I'm sorry.” She whispered before they were both dragged off. James found himself tied to a chair not long after in a room full of electronic. James considered snagging something when the mission was over. Q would have a field day. James looked around, trying to memorize all he could. If he could even begin to explain what he saw to Q later he knew the genius would be able to figure it all out, he’d have fun puzzling over it as well. The door opened and James looked up, but the man was too far away to distinguish.

 

“Hello, James.” The voice was familiar, but James couldn’t put his finger on who it belonged to, it seemed almost muffled. “Welcome. Do you like the island? My grandmother had an island.Nothing to boast of.You could walk around it in an hour. I’m quite sure the dear Holmes family has more to their name.” James stiffened slightly. Q had said that the bomber had wanted him out of the building, possibly, and also might have known who he was. James did not like it that this man knew who Q was. “But still it was a paradise for us.One summer, we went for a visitand discovered the place had been infested with rats!They'd come on a fishing boatand gorged themselves on coconut.So how do you get rats off an island? Hmm? My grandmother showed me.We buried an oil drum and hinged the lid,then wired coconut to the lid as bait.And the rats would come for the coconut and they would fall into the drum. And after a month,you have trapped all the rats.But what do you do then? Throw the drum into the ocean? Burn it? No.You just leave it. And they begin to get hungry. And one by one they start eating each other until there are only two left.The two survivors. And then what? Do you kill them? No.You take them and release them into the trees.But now they don't eat coconut anymore. Now they only eat rat.” The man was close and James’ eyes widened. He had to look beyond the blonde hair that didn’t suit the man and the slightly odd shape to his face, but he knew him.

 

“Tiago?” James breathed with wide eyes. The man was dead.

 

“Silva.” The old 005 corrected. Silva, Tiago’s old undercover name. Silva was Tiago’s Sterling. “The two survivors, this is what they made us.You like to think you lead your own life, but you don’t. They control it and they leave you broken.Just look at you, barely held together by your pills and your drink.”

 

“Don't forget my pathetic love of country.” James snarked, trying to figure out what had happened to the man he’d been friends with, the man he’d worked with. It didn’t take him long to realize that the hell he’d gone through in China, the hell Q had gone through...Tiago had gone through it for years.

 

“You're still clinging to your faith in that old woman and that Holmes boy who thinks he’s the most clever of all the Holmes boys, when all they do is lie to you.”

 

“They never lie to me.” James defended.

 

“No?”

 

“No.” James’ jaw closed. He couldn’t be glad to see an old friend. He couldn’t be happy. This man had been twisted and he was no longer a friend.

 

“What did you score in your marksmanship evaluation?”

 

“70.” James said, it was under passing, but he knew he hadn’t passed.

 

“Ha-ha...40.Did they tell you the psychologist cleared you for duty?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“No. No.” Tiago shook his head and sat down at a computer screen, pulling up James’ file. How in the hell was he in Q’s system without Q noticing. “You failed. Alcohol and substance addiction indicated. Pathological rejection of authority based on unresolved childhood trauma. Extreme dependency on significant other, and just who is that, by the way? Subject is not approved for field duty and immediate suspension from service is advised.” Tiago said. “Oh, but wait, then Mr. Watson-Holmes got in, adjusted your scores to just under failure and advised underneath the psychologist's remark that she should disregard the scores, that you were ready to go out into the field. What is this if not betrayal? They sent you after me knowing you weren’t ready, knowing you’ll likely die. Mummy and Clever Q were very bad.” Tiago sat in front of him and undid James’ top button, James stiffened slightly and Tiago narrowed his eyes, not stopping as he looked at the wound in James’ shoulder, the one that ached terribly with his hands tied so tightly behind his back. “Ooh, see what they’ve done to you?”

 

“Well, they’ve never tied me to a chair.”

 

“Their loss. But as I recall, Q wanted to this at one point. 009 and I had a bet going. Anyone would be lucky to have you tied to a chair, tied to anything really.” Tiago smirked. 

 

“Are you sure this is about M?” James asked, hoping maybe he wasn’t so angry at Q. Didn’t he know Q had looked for him even after he’d been pronounced dead? Didn’t he know Q had begged to have him saved.

 

“It's about her and Q. And you, and me.You see, we are the last two rats.We can either eat each other...Hmm?...or eat everyone else.” Tiago said putting his hands on James’ knees and sliding them up his thighs. James tensed. He’d been through this before and bless Q for being as sweet as he had been about it, though, James would rather be raped that watch Q go through it any day of the week. “Oh...you're trying to remember your training now.What's the regulation to cover this? Well, first time for everything. Hm?”

 

“What makes you think this is my first time?” James asked. Tiago was mental. He needed to stop him now before he tried to get to Q...and M, but mostly Q.

 

“Oh, Mr. Bond! All that physical stuff... So dull, so dull.Chasing spies...so old-fashioned! Your knees must be killing you. England. The Empire! MI6! You're living in a ruin as well, you just don't know it yet. At least here there are no old ladies giving orders and no little gadgets from that fool in Q-Branch. If you wanted, you could pick your own secret missions. As I do. Name it. Name it. Destabilize a multinational by manipulating stocks. Easy. Interrupt transmissions from a spy satellite over Kabul. Done. Rig an election in Uganda, all to the highest bidder.”

 

“Or rig a gas explosion in London.” James’ eyes narrowed. This damn man could have killed Q.

 

“Just point and click.” Tiago smirked.

 

“Well, everybody needs a hobby.” James would kill that man. 

 

“So what's yours?”

  
“Resurrection. But I think I’ll have a new one, if it means taking you down.” No one threatened Q and got away with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	51. Hacked

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q learns an old friend is alive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy. :D

Hacked

 

“Q…” James walked into Q-branch and right to the boffin who stood at the largest screen.

 

“Bond, welcome home, what the hell happened out there?” Q asked with wide eyes. “No one will tell me what the bloody hell is going on.” James sighed heavily and grabbed Q’s arm, pulling him out of Q-branch.

 

“I know who tried to blow up MI6 and you’re not going to like it.”

 

“What do you mean?” James looked down at the floor and Q lifted his face. “James, what’s happening? Why won’t you tell me? Why are they keeping me out of containment? Why did they shut off the damn cameras?”

 

“It’s Tiago, Q.”

 

“What?”

 

“Tiago didn’t die. They tortured him for years, they changed him and he’s out for blood.”

 

“No, that can’t be true.” Q shook his head.

 

“I’m not lying to you.” James said. Tears began to fall down Q’s face.

 

“Let me see him. He’s my friend I can talk to him. Let me try to do something.” James grabbed Q’s hands.

 

“Hamish, he’s not the man you remember. He isn’t. He’s gone. He wants you dead, he thinks you didn’t try to save him.”

 

“But I did. I still have nightmares about seeing him dragged off. I still have nightmares about what they would do to him.” Q’s breath caught harshly in his throat and James pulled him into a tight hug.

 

“Sh, it’s not your fault, okay. I don’t want you near him, he wants you dead and I need you to be safe. He isn’t your friend, not anymore. He’s not safe. He shot a woman in front of me, he’s a rapist, and he’s blood crazed. Please, I need you to stay safe.”

 

“But I’m the reason he’s hurt...he got hurt because of me.”

 

“You didn’t make that choice, Q, it’s not yours.” James rocked the quartermaster gently in his arms before pulling away and wiping away the tears. “Tiago’s gone, Silva has taken his place.”

 

“I don’t want to believe it.”

 

“No one does, Q, I’m sorry.” James kissed his forehead gently. “I have his computer, M wanted you to go through it, do you think you can?”

 

“Yeah, I can do this.” Q nodded, wiping his eyes and straightening up. “He did try to hurt you after all and he blew up my branch.” Q took a deep breath and nodded. They walked back out into Q-branch and Q took the computer from the bag James carried, trying to look in control as he opened it, plugging it in. Slowly, he started to work. “Now, looking at Silva's computer,it seems to me he's done a number of slightly unusual things.He's established failsafe protocols to wipe the memory if there's any attempt to access certain files.Only six people in the world could program safeguards like that.”

 

“Of course there are. Can you get past them?” James asked. Q shot a scathing look at the double-o.

 

“I invented them. You should know better than to underestimate me, Bond.”

 

“Of course, Q.” James smiled as Q turned, his eyes wandering to his trousers, mainly what they clung onto perfectly.

 

“Right, then.Let's see what you've got for us, Mr. Silva.” James could hear the struggle it was for Q to say that name, a longing for his friend to exist buried in his voice. James felt his pain. “We're in.”

 

“What in the hell is that?”

 

“It's his Omega site.Most encrypted level he has.Looks like obfuscated code to conceal its true purpose.Security through obscurity. Obscurity isn’t good enough.” Q smiled before burying himself in the work. “Ooh, clever, I do love it when things put up a bit of a fight.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Ever had a Rubik’s Cube fight back against you? It makes it all the more clever. Annnd got it.” Q smiled. “Clever, but I’m more clever.” Q smiled as a map unfolded. “Why a map though? What is he planning?”

 

“Your guess is as good as mine.”

 

“He’s one of us, he knew we’d come down here, this map is,” Q jumped and looked around, everything in the room changing. Doors opening. “Shit! Shit, shit, shit!” Q snapped as he unplugged the computer and quickly rushed to his own.

 

“Q, what’s happening?”

 

“The damn flaw in the system I found. I thought it was just a simple little coding error, it didn’t actually change anything, but it was a fucking loophole. He couldn’t have accessed our systems like that, but that damn flaw, that little blip and he fucking hacked us.” Not such a clever boy, flashed across the screen. “He’s going to run.”

 

“He’s coming for you.”

 

“M, more likely, M is in the open, find him, James.” 

 

“But Q.”

 

“That’s an order, Bond. I’ll call for more security, but I have to stop this now, I’ll be in your ear, go.” James picked up an earpiece and rushed out, drawing his gun.

 

_ “I’m in the tube.”  _ James’ voice came through ad Q worked.

 

“The bloody man had this planned. I saw that damn flaw years ago and I kept fixing it, but it kept working itself in. I didn’t understand it, I just thought it was someone working on it who always managed to get a line of code wrong, but dammit, I was so stupid. He blew us up because I was an idiot, he got people killed. He sent us down here so he’d have control.”

 

“ _ Q, it wasn’t you, calm down. We’re going to get him, it’s fine. _ ”

 

“He fucking planned this.” Q wanted to rip out his own hair. He couldn’t believe he was so blind.

 

“ _ It’s what comes next that I’m worried about. Make sure you stay safe. As soon as M’s clear I’m coming to get you and I’m taking you somewhere where I can protect you. _ ”

 

“I can’t just leave my branch, Bond.” Q snapped. “The District Line is the closest, that’s where he will have gone.” It still floored James that Q could fight off an attack, guide him on a mission, and have an argument all at the same time.

 

“ _ That wasn’t a request, Q. _ ”

 

“I’m not having this conversation right now, Trevelyan has arrived if that makes you feel better. There’s a service door on your left.”

 

“ _ Got it… It won’t open _ .”

 

“Of course it will, put your pack into it.”

 

“ _ Why don’t you come down here and put your back into it? No, it’s stuck.” Q heard a noise in the background. “Oh, good, there’s a train coming _ .”

 

“Hm, that’s vexing.”

 

“ _ All you’ve got to say is that this is vexing _ ?”

 

“Yes, vexing, score of seventeen. I swear the door will open if you put your back into it.”

 

_ “I’d like to see you put your back into it _ .” James grunted.

 

“Yes, I’m sure you would.” Q said, worry in his voice. He heard a loud noise and held his breath.

 

“ _ I’m through _ .”

 

“Told you. Police are on their way to M and security has been alerted. You’re at Temple Tube station, yes?”

 

“ _ Along with half of London, yes. _ ”

 

“Oh, there you are, found you.”

 

“I know where I am, where is he?”

 

“One second. I’m playing a highly advanced round of Where’s Waldo at the moment.”

 

“ _ The train's leaving. Do I get on the train _ ?”

 

“Probability says yes, but don't get on.I'm not sure he's on it. One second.”

 

“ _ Q, it’s leaving. _ ”

 

“Get on the train.” 

 

“ _ What _ ?”

 

“I said run like hell and get on that train.”

 

“ _ Sometimes I hate you _ .”

 

“No, you really don’t.”

 

“ _ No, I don’t _ .”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	52. Death to M

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> M is shot, James takes Q and runs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a Tuesday.

Death to M

  
  


M glanced around, she felt like the only people even mildly on her side, aside from Tanner and Moneypenny, was Mycroft and Mallory and she knew both of them weren’t fully on her side. It wasn’t personal, just business. “Chairman, Ministers.Today I've repeatedly heard how irrelevant my department has become. Why do we need agents? The Double-O section? Isn't it all rather quaint? Well, I suppose I see a different world than you do. And the truth is that what I see frightens me.”

 

Mycroft was sitting in the corner and he suddenly looked down at his phone. H. Holmes, was on the screen. Mycroft unlocked the phone and looked at the text.  _ Vatican Cameos. 7 is on his way, be careful.  _ Shit, Mycroft thought, looking around. Alerting everyone would just bring panic, instead he sent texts to his personal security, making sure they were prepared.

 

“I'm frightened because our enemies are no longer known to us.They do not exist on a map. They're not nations. They are individuals. Look around you. Who do you fear? Can you see a face? A uniform? A flag? No. Our world is not more transparent now. It's more opaque. It's in the shadows.That's where we must do battle. So, before you declare us irrelevant,ask yourselves, how safe do you feel? I've just one more thing to say. My late husband was a great lover of poetry.And I suppose some of it sunk in, despite my best intentions. And here today I remember this: "We are not now that strength,which in old days moved earth and heaven; that which we are, we are; one equal temper of heroic hearts,made weak by time and fate,but strong in will… To strive, to seek,to find and not to yield." Mycroft ducked as shots were fired. It was a poor day to choose not to bring a gun with him.

 

Mallory shoved M out of the way as Tiago shot at her, managing to get his own arm shot for his efforts. Everything grew loud as James entered, shots flying through the air. Mallory took up a gun as Moneypenny and Tanner attempted to get M out. Tiago hit his mark. A shout filled the air as M collapsed, Tanner grabbed ahold of her and dragged her out as Tiago ducked in an alcove.

 

“One down, James! Told you you weren’t ready.” Tiago laughed before he ran. 

 

“Dammit, no!” James glanced around and caught sight of Mycroft. “I’m stealing your car.”

 

“By all means.” Mycroft nodded. The look in James eyes and what the man had said could only mean one thing. One down...that meant Q was next. James was gone before Mycroft could finish his statement.

 

800Q8

 

“James, what happened? Tanner says M’s dead.” Alec said with wide eyes. James brushed past his friend and went instantly to Q. James grabbed Q by his arm and started pulling him away.

 

“We have to go.” James insisted.

 

“What? James I have work to do, I can’t leave.”

 

“Tiago will bet on that, he’s coming here for you, Q. He is going to kill you. I need to get you out.”

 

“Bond”

 

“Q, go, we’ll handle things here, you need to be safe.” R told him, looking at Alec.

 

“And if he comes in here looking for me?” Q asked. “I can’t live with more of you dying because I failed.”

 

“We have a double-o here, Alec will protect us.” R nodded. “Get him out of here, Bond.” 

 

“Come on, Q.” James pulled Q out of the branch, James rushed them out and got Q into a car.

 

“We can’t take this car, Bond, we need a different one, Silva can track this one.” Q warned him.

 

“I thought we’d stop at home before we disappeared.”

 

“The garage?” Q asked.

 

“The garage.” James nodded. 

 

“Where are you planning on taking us? Be careful what you say though.”

 

“Done.” James said simply. Q looked at him questioningly, then he remembered James’ responses during his psych eval. 

 

“Good.” Q nodded as they parked a block from their home. James grabbed Q’s hand and they both ran through the streets. They both knew that Tiago had been to Q’s home before and they knew they couldn’t waste time there. They opened the garage and Q and James both began to load it before jumping in the Aston together. It had been half-destroyed on a mission and MI6 had called it a lost cause. Q had fixed it for James.

 

Q opened his personal laptop up as James drove. James had always teased the way the thing looked. A corner had cracked and Q had taped it together, the rest was covered in stickers. James had even gotten him a dinosaur sticker just to tease him, but Q adored it and put it on with a smile. “What are you doing?” James asked, holding Q’s hand. He wasn’t going to lose Q. He’d seen M, the closest thing he’d had to a mother shot in front of him, the wound was numb, and he would let it be numb, he needed to focus on keeping Q alive.

 

“Silva isn’t going to stop until I’m dead. He will hurt people I care about. He knows my family, he knows where we live, he may not know if we’re married, but he’ll use my family and my branch against me, he knows where to hurt me. He always said my heart was too big.”

 

“What are you doing?”

 

“I’m leading him to us. It will save people here. We’ll fight him ourselves.”

 

“Do you trust me that much?”

 

“I trust you with everything, James.” Q promised, typing with one hand as James lifted Q’s hand and gently kissed the back of it. “We’re going to be fine, and I’m delaying the breadcrumbs, he’ll find the first one in three hours. We’ll get to Skyfall long before he can get everything he needs and get up there. We’ll have time to prepare.”

 

“Are you alright?”

 

“I’m fine. M’s dead. My best friend is back from the dead and he wants to kill me. It’s basically Tuesday when it comes to days at the office.” Q shrugged, the calm that filled him made him look like Sherlock, relaxed in the face of danger. “Are you alright?”

 

“It’s a Tuesday...my second mom’s dead and my husband is in danger from an old friend.”

 

“Perhaps it’s a Monday, then.” Q sighed, squeezing his hand. He would have asked for his hand back, but he could tell he was grounding James in that moment. He’d type with one hand if that’s what it took to keep James grounded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	53. Skyfall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q meets Kincade.

Skyfall

 

“Well, no wonder why you hated this place.” Q said as he got out of the car. James was at his side instantly.

 

“Come on, I want you inside.”

 

“The house or you?”

 

“This is not the time for jokes, Q.” James said as they unloaded the car.

 

“You get all the time in the world for your one liners, I thought I’d try it.” Q shrugged, hauling a large bag to the door. James followed and opened the door, looking around  cautiously before leading Q in. Q looked around and then grabbed James tightly. “Someone’s in here.” Q nodded. He looked down at the footsteps in the dust. “Approximately five nine, judging by the stride length. Only one person, judging by the footprint. It’s not Silva.”

 

“Stay behind me.” James said as they put their bags down. James readied his gun and led him through the house. They found out the man in the house had the same plan, pointing a gun at both of them.

 

“James?” The old man asked. “James Bond.”

 

“Good God. Are you still alive?” James asked with wide eyes, both of them lowering their guns.

 

“It's nice to see you, too.”

 

“Q, this is Kincade.Gamekeeper here since I was a boy.”

 

“Funny name for a man…” Kincade held his hand out.

 

“Hamish, my name is Hamish Bond.” Q smiled, shaking the man’s hand.

 

“Another Bond, well, that’s new.” Kincade smiled at James. “Pleased to meet you, Hamish. You're a tad late, James. They've sold the place, when they thought you were dead. It seems they were wrong.” Kincade nodded. “What are you two doing here? Honeymoon?”

 

“That was years ago.” Q blushed.

 

“Some men are coming to kill us.” James explained.

 

“But we're gonna kill them first.” Q nodded.

 

“Then we'd better get ready.” Kincade smiled.

 

“What? You just take that at face value?” Q wondered.

 

“James has been presumed dead a few times, that last one was rough though. I suspect he has a dangerous line of work…”

 

“We both do.” Q nodded. “Same line. I just don’t usually carry weapons with me to do my part. I like him, James, you should have introduced us.”

 

“You two can chat latter. Do we still have a gun room?”

 

“They sold the lot to a collector from Idaho or some such place.They were shipped out weeks ago.There's just...your father's old hunting rifle. We couldn't let that go and this is what we've got.There might be a couple of sticks of dynamite from the quarry. But if all else fails, sometimes the old ways are the best.” Kincade shrugged. 

 

“And I’ve got a few things I can help with. I’ll go set some mines.” Q started to walk away and James grabbed him tightly. 

 

“Q…”

 

“I’ll be safe, he won’t be here for a few hours.” Q promised before kissing James gently. “I’ll be back quickly.” James nodded and slowly let go of Q.

 

“Stay safe out there, and make sure we know where all of your traps are.”

 

“Of course, and I’ll rig the house when I get back in. I’ll keep an eye on his progress as well.”

 

“Okay, just...stay safe.” Q smiled warmly and left.

 

“So who is it we're supposed to be fighting?”

 

“No we in it, Kincade.This is not your fight.” James shook his head as he headed back to the front room, grabbing his bag, noting that Q had taken his.

 

“Try and stop me, you jumped-up little shit.” Kincade smiled and James smiled back. “He seems like a good man.”

 

“A better man than me.”

 

“You love him.”

 

“Yes, more than anything.”

 

“This person...he’s coming to kill him isn’t he?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“I’d still help you, but out of curiosity who do you work for?”

 

“MI6, Q’s the genius that runs it all, he’s saved my life more than I can count. He’s brilliant. I can’t lose him.”

 

“Then you won’t. Whoever’s coming will wish they hadn’t.”

 

“I couldn’t agree more.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	54. Waiting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes all you can do is wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get prepared, everyone.

Waiting

 

Q looked down at his laptop and rubbed his eyes. James stepped up behind him and rubbing his shoulders. Q groaned and leaned his head back against James’ chest. “How long to we have, Hamish?” James asked, still rubbing his shoulders, gently pressing a kiss to Q’s hair.

 

“Seven hours, he took a detour.”

 

“There’s a bed upstairs, you should sleep.”

 

“You should too, but you won’t.”

 

“No, I won’t.”

 

“I’ll make you.” Q smiled.

 

“I’d like to see you try.” James said, pulling Q up. Q folded his laptop and closed it, following James. James lead him into a room and opened a secret door. “If it gets bag, get in there and run. It’ll take you under the moor and to the chapel.”

 

“Thank you, but you’re coming with me, James.”

 

“Of course.” James nodded. “Come on, let’s get you some sleep.” James lead Q up the stairs and opened the door to a musty bedroom. Q didn’t care. He put his laptop down and set an alarm on it.

 

“It’ll tell us when he’s two hours out.” Q said, pulling James down onto the bed. Q wrapped his arms around James and snuggled into his chest. “Please rest James.”

 

“I don’t know if I can.”

 

“I need you to. I need you to be strong for me, Bond, you won’t be strong if you’re exhausted. Bond, your quartermaster needs you to sleep.”

 

“Okay, Q…” James kissed the top of his head. Q pulled something from his pocket and wrapped it around James’ throat. “What’s this?”

 

“You lost the tag I made you, I have to make sure everyone knows you’re mine.” Q pulled back and looked up at James with a warm smile.

 

“I love you.”

 

“I love you too, Mr. Bond.” Q beamed and pressed a loving kiss to James’ lips. “Sleep…”

 

“I will.” James promised, pulling Q close. They both settled and fell into a light sleep.

 

Q shot up at a noise from his laptop a few hours later. Q left James’ arms and went to his laptop, James sat up with wide eyes, gun in hand. “What is it?”

 

“He’s trying to hack my computer.”

 

“Can he?”

 

“He’s good, not that good. I made a mistake in Q-branch, but this is my laptop. He can’t get in. But...I wonder…” Q opened something up and began to look through MI6’s systems. They at least got him out of MI6 systems. Q checked in on everyone, relieved to see everyone was fine. “Everyone’s alright…”

 

“Except M.”

 

“Yeah, except her…” Q nodded. An email came through. Q opened it and his eyes widened. There were pictures of the inside of their house. “James, he was in our house.”

 

_ So, James finally nailed you, didn’t he, Q? _

 

_ Not such a clever boy, he won’t save you. _

 

_ Not from me. _

 

_ Spend your last hours thinking on your sins. _

 

“Why couldn’t I save him? Why couldn’t I save him, James?” Q turned and James pulled him into his arms, crying into his chest.

 

“It wasn’t your fault, Q. We should get ready.”

 

“Yeah…” Q nodded, putting his laptop away and putting it in its indestructible case, putting it on his back.

 

“How are your range scores?”

 

“Still perfect, come on.” They walked downstairs, hand in hand before they both stopped at the table, picking up guns. James watched Q load his gun. James loaded his own slowly.

 

“So, I read my obituary.”

 

“It was awful, M wrote it.”

 

“I figured as much.” James nodded. “You would have written it differently.”

 

“I wouldn’t have written it at all. I was too busy believing you were alive. Everyone thought I’d lost my mind. But you did come home.”

 

“I’ll always come home to you.” James promised.

 

“Are you alright? About M?”

 

“I’m not thinking about it. There will be time later. How are you, about Tiago?”

 

“Silva,” Q corrected. “I’m not alright. I have wanted him to have lived every day since we lost him. I feel responsible for him every day. I feel responsible for all of my agents and he…”

 

“He was your best friend.”

 

“He was my first friend, my first real friend. James my first friend and they fed him to wolves and I couldn’t save him. I wanted to, and now he’s ruined because of it. The pain he went through… But now he’s coming here to kill me, to kill you maybe. I wish I could have saved him, now I might have to kill him.”

 

“Hey, come here.” James pulled Q into a warm hug.

 

“What would I do without you, James?”

 

“The same thing I would do without you, I imagine. But neither of us are going to figure that out. We’re going to win this fight and you and me are going to take a vacation. How does that sound?”

 

“Beautiful, James.” Q smiled, kissing the man. James pulled him close, kissing him back passionately. Kincade walked into the room and he looked at the floor until the two men untangled themselves. James gently cupping Q’s face in his hands.

 

“Stay safe.”

 

“You too.” Q nodded. “We’re going to win, just like we always do.”

 

“I always win when you’re fighting with me.”

 

“That’s because I’m a genius and you are stronger than everyone else. A genius and a soldier, it seems to be the best combination any person could ask for.”

 

“It works.” James smiled.

 

“One hour left, be ready.”

 

“Always am, dear.” 

 

“And make sure the equipment comes back in one piece.”

 

“Always.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	55. Bullets, Bombs, and Fires

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It all goes to hell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Over 100,000 words now... :o Thanks for sticking with me.  
> Also, sorry.

Bullets, Bombs, and Fires

 

“They’re here.” Q said, looking down at his phone, he’d long since slipped his laptop into a lifeproof case (yes, lifeproof even for  secret agents, he’d designed it himself to withstand pretty much everything but a nuke). He’d hidden it in the fireplace. If Skyfall blew up, he’d at least know what part of the ruins to search through. 

 

“You sure?” Kincade asked, but seconds later they heard a helicopter. “Nevermind.”

 

“Cars too?” James asked, his keen ears catching sounds the others couldn’t. 

 

“Yes, he brought a small army.” Q frowned. “I wish I would have brought the sniper.”

 

“You do take after your papa.” James smiled at him.

 

“Could have had half of them by now.” Q agreed. “James?”

 

“Hm?”

 

“What about Tiago?” Q asked. “If we can take him injured, could we? Please I need to know why. I need to try to fix this.”

 

“You can’t fix treason, Hamish. He murdered M.”

 

“I know I can’t fix it completely, but maybe...maybe I could… I just.”

 

“I know. We’ll try, Q, he was my friend too.” James kissed his forehead as Q looked down.

 

“Ten seconds until they reach the house.”

 

“Stay safe.” James said, pulling his slide back, Q echoing him after he put his phone away.

 

“You too. Shoot straight and please bring all of the equipment back.”

 

“Always.” James winked before moving through the house.

 

All hell broke loose moments later. Bullets tore through walls, mines blew up, traps exploded, and blood covered the ground as more and more fell. Kincade stayed with Q as James tried to take on the bulk of the enemies, but some still slipped through towards the pair. Q managed to take them all down, sliding out from his cover as another man stepped into the room. Two guns fired, both bullets struck. Q’s was a killshot in the face, the man’s punched a hole through Q’s gut. Q hissed in pain and rolled back into cover, quickly putting pressure on it. It didn’t hurt quite like a gunshot wound should, but it was bleeding like one, he’d have to keep it under control.

 

“Are you alright?” Kincade shouted. Q looked down, remembering what his father had taught him.

 

“I’ll be alright, he got lucky.” Q nodded truthfully. He’d be fine if he didn’t hurt it further, the bullet was still inside. As long as the skirmish ended relatively quickly, he’d be fine, perfect.

 

“It’s me!” James shouted as he backed into the room quickly, still shooting. He rushed back towards them and got one look at Q, seeing the way he’d tied his cardigan tightly to his side. “Alright?”

 

“I’ve had worse, I’ll be fine.”

 

“I’m blowing this place to hell, I need you two to go. Get him to the chapel, he’ll need to work on that. Be safe, I’ll be behind you.” James nodded.

 

“You and your explosions.” Q smiled before he and Kincade rushed off. Q lead the man, pulling his phone out and typing quickly.

 

_ Extraction needed when convenient, and by convenient I mean asap.-Q _

 

It took a moment but R texted back and Q wanted to kiss her.  _ ETA 30. Injuries? _

 

_ Gunshot wound, left side. 30 will be fine, just make sure it’s only 30.  _ Q finished before pulling out his gun again, allowing Kincade to lead him through the tunnels. They climbed up through a hole in the ground a moment later, just in time to feel the earth tremble and a fire explode, consuming the house and everything around it.

 

“He always hated that place.” Q sighed. His side burned as the shock wore away and he could tell he’d ripped himself open further by the time they made it to the chapel. He sighed, sitting down and putting pressure on the wound. “Is there anything here for wounds? My father was an army doctor, I know how to temporarily fix this I have the right things.”

 

“I’ll check, Hamish.” Kincade nodded, leaving the boffin alone to tend to his wound.

 

Outside Silva’s eyes were locked on the chapel as he rushed across the grounds to get to it. It would finally be over. The woman was dead, it was only Q left. Q, the innocent young man he’d befriended. Q, the boy he had thought to have had too big of a heart. Q who proved just as heartless as the rest. Q who had sent him to torture for countless years. Q who had never once noticed him leaving tiny little holes in his system, disguised as simple, benign coding errors.

 

A gunshot rang and Silva turned glaring at Bond. “Don’t you fucking go after him. Aren’t you more interested in which rat wins?”

 

“That’s where you’re wrong, the rat is secondary to disposing of the real problem.”

 

“What did Q ever do to you?” James shouted, gun still pointed at the man.

 

“Why do you protect him so?” Silva asked, looking James up and down. “Ooh, not a Watson-Holmes anymore is he? Hamish Bond.” Silva smiled. “Kill him and there is no last rat standing is there? Love is a liability, James, it blinds you, and then it cripples you.” Silva smirked. James reached for the trigger but Silva tsked and shook his head, pointing at the men surrounding James. “I’ll give him a goodbye kiss for you… Kill him.” Silva ordered, leaving James behind to fight for his life and turning forwards to find his old friend Q.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	56. Hamish and Tiago

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That moment we've all waited for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry.

Hamish and Tiago

 

Q slowly stood up, slouching not doing any good except for putting more pressure on the wound. His hands and cardigan were covered in blood and the pain was a bit too much for Q’s liking, but he was managing. He heard the door open and turned, but he froze, his eyes widening as he saw Silva stand in the doorway. “Tiago.” Q whispered, it all becoming so real, seeing a dead friend in front of him.

 

“Hello, Q.” Silva smiled. Q glanced at the gun he’d left in the seat and looked back at Silva. “I wouldn’t, if I were you.” Silva said, lifting his own.

 

“I can’t find the” Kincade broke off when he saw the two of them.

 

“Kincade, put the gun down and back up into that room, stay there. He has nothing to do with this, Tiago.”

 

“You’re right.” Kincade slowly put the gun down.

 

“Q?”

 

“Just do it, Kincade.” Q ordered in his quartermaster voice. Kincade backed up and closed the door.

 

“You’re hurt.” Silva observed in a mock-sad voice. He walked forward, gun still trained on Q. “What have they done to you? You started out as such a fine boy, now this. Bloodstained in more ways than one.” Silva poked the wound and Q winced, grinding his teeth together.

 

“Why? Why are you doing this?” Q asked. “You were my friend. My best friend. Why?”

 

“Because you did this to me, my friend.” Silva spat. “You might as well kill me yourself, do it, you ordered it before, do it once and for all, my friend. Kill me, kill you.” Silva pressed their heads together, hoping Q would cover his hand with his and pull the trigger.

 

“I would never do that. I didn’t hurt you. I did everything I could to get you out.”

 

“You put me there to begin with, don’t think I don’t know how you and M plotted things while the agents were gone.”

 

“I wasn’t at MI6, Tiago, I would have never made that call.”

 

“Oh, you’re smarter than this, Hamish, I don’t want such a stupid ‘I was out sick that day’ excuse. There is no excuse for what I went through.”

 

“I know there isn’t. I went through it too!” Q shouted. Silva slowly pulled away, gun still pressed to Q’s head. “Tiago, I know what they did to you and I’m so sorry. It should have never happened, to any of us.”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“You must have read the report.” Q unbuttoned his top few buttons and revealing scars that had never faded. “I went on that mission to China. I was there. 007, Turney and”

 

“Four others.” Silva realized.

 

“That’s how”

 

“You cover up to the PM when you send the best asset into the field and they don’t come back.” Silva finished with wide eyes.

 

“It’s how you keep up appearances, even when you’re at your weakest. I was there, Tiago. They had me. They tortured me every day. The let me starve, they had me raped.... Tiago, I didn’t make that choice. I was too busy dying to make that choice. They never told you? They never told you what they were doing? You didn’t know?”

 

“They knocked me out and I woke up in prison.” Q wiped his tears away with bloodied hands, smearing his own blood across his face.

 

“You were my best friend…” Q shook his head. “I would have never let you go.” Tiago blinked away a gloss of tears and looked at Q. If they would have told him Q was dying, he would have gone. Any agent would have gone to hell for Q, any one of them. “I’m so sorry what they did to you. I’m so sorry.” Tiago reached out and gently touched the blood on the younger man’s face.

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

“What are you talking about? You’re the one who got hurt, not me. I get why you’re angry. I barely survived my time, I can only imagine how bad it was for you.” 

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

“What are you doing? TIAGO DON’T”

 

Bang.

 

Blood splattered across the floor along with bone and brain matter. Tiago’s body fell to the ground. The door ripped open and James looked in with wide eyes, soaked to the bone. Q was unmoving, covered in his own blood and some of his best friend’s. James rushed forward and pulled Q to his feet. He gently shaked Q.

 

“Q?”

 

Q didn’t move, didn’t breathe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	57. Going Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time for mourning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter.

Going Home

 

“Q?”

 

“Wh-what took you so long, 007?” Q barely managed to get out, still staring at his best friend and the brains that were blown out of him.

 

“Well, I got into some deep water.” James said, not feeling cold, even though he knew he should. He was far too concerned about Q to feel the cold. “Are you alright?”

 

“No.” Q shook his head, he could think of no other answer. He wasn’t alright, he was bleeding out and his best friend was dead in front of him, dead for a second time. James picked him up and laid him down on a bench, putting pressure on the wound. “He’s dead, James, he’s dead.”

 

“I know.” James said simply, focusing on trying to keep Q alive. He knew Q was shattered by his death and that he was falling apart to his painful wound. He could only handle one problem at a time, given he was in shock himself.

 

“He killed himself, right in front of me.”

 

“Sh, honey, sh.”

 

“I failed him again.” Q said, tears running down his cheeks. 

 

“Sh, it’ll be alright.” James whispered. “How are you physically?”

 

“Dizzy, tired, hurt.” Q said, his eyes heavy, unable to stop looking away from the blood he could still see on the floor. James was in the way of the rest of the gore, but Q could still see it, it was burned into his brain. He had imagined how Tiago had died and it had given him nightmares for years, now he knew how he’d died and that image would never, ever, leave him.

 

“Stay with me, Hamish, alright? How long until extraction?”

 

“Fifteen minutes, 007.” Q closed his eyes, trying to go into Q mode, trying to shut down the way Holmes boys could.

 

“Stay with me for fifteen minutes, Quartermaster, then you can sleep.”

 

“Are they all dead, 007?”

 

“Mission accomplished, Q.”

 

“Are you alright, 007?”

 

“Hypothermia, some minor scrapes and burns, I’m alright for fifteen minutes.”

 

“We’re safe, 007?” Q tried to keep the memories boxed up, but it didn’t stay where he wanted it to.

 

“Yes, Q. We did good. We survived.”

 

“Why did he have to do that?”

 

“I don’t know, Q, I don’t know.” James fussed over the man and kept babbling at him, trying to keep Q alert, but his eyes blinked closed seven minutes later, the amount of blood outside of his pale skin was alarming. A few short minutes later evac arrived, pulling Q away from James and onto a helicopter. Alec stayed with James.

 

“Hey, they’ve got him, he’s going to be alright. I’m supposed to get you home. There’s a car by what’s left of the house.” Alec said, frowning when he saw Tiago’s dead body.

 

“Yeah, we just need to grab Q’s laptop, he won’t get up without it safely near him. It’s his baby.” James nodded slowly.

 

800Q8

 

“Wow. I didn't even know you could come up here.” Eve said, walking across the rooftop.

 

“Hate to waste a view.” James said, looking out over London. 

 

“I can see why. I bet Q would love the view too.”

 

“I thought you were going back out on active service.” James changed the subject. He’d stepped out of Q’s room to stop thinking about how pale he was for a moment, not to let the thought consume him.

 

“I declined.You said it yourself, fieldwork's not for everyone.”

 

“If it helps, I feel a lot safer.” James smiled. She nodded and handed him a box.

 

“Her will was read today. She left you this. Maybe it was her way of telling you to take a desk job.”

 

“Just the opposite.Thank you.” James smiled slightly. No, he wasn’t ready to be done and he knew he still had enough in him to keep doing what he loved, just as Q promised, but he was going to make a change. A change he hoped the new M would approve of.

 

800Q8

 

Q woke up to James at his side and he nodded tiredly at the blonde. “Are you alright, James?”

 

“Well, you’re in a bed in medical and I’m not.”

 

“You would break out of your bed to come for me, James.” Q rolled his eyes.

 

“I’m fine...just worried about you?”

 

“It’s just a flesh wound.” Q promised, but both he and James knew the worst wound wasn’t physical. “Can I go home? I’m tired and I don’t want to be here.”

 

“Yeah, I’ll check you out, we need to talk too.”

 

“Okay.” Q nodded. James smiled and gently placed a kiss on Q’s forehead. 

 

“Be back soon.” James nodded as Q got himself around, slowly managing to get dressed. James walked in a moment later and helped to straighten Q’s shirt before wrapping an arm around him and helping him leave the room. James helped Q into their car and drove them home. James opened the door for Q and helped him out of the car before walking him into the house. The house was clean.

 

“I thought he might have broken in.”

 

“He didn’t know we were married, so he didn’t.”

 

“He would have been my best man…” Q winced.

 

“Hey, it wasn’t your fault, either time.”

 

“M’s dead too.”

 

“She wouldn’t have wanted to go without a fight. She left that damn dog to me…”

 

“Well, that’s her for you…” Q whispered as James walked with him up the stairs, making sure Q made it up them safely. Q sat down on their bed and stared at the wall. James sat next to him and gently put his hand in Q’s. “I just wanted to help him.”

 

“You couldn’t help him. He was deeply hurt, Hamish, hurt over and over again. He was driven towards hate and anger.”

 

“I just wanted to save him.”

 

“He’s at peace now. You didn’t do this to him.”

 

“It doesn’t feel like it.”

 

“He was tortured, broken, and full of anger. He chose what happened to him, Q, not you.” Q cried quietly and James held his hand gently, not doing any more, knowing that Q would reach for him if he wanted more. Q cried quietly, unstoppably. It was a long time before Q slouched and leaned against James. James gently wrapped his arm around his husband, holding him lovingly, shedding a few tears himself for the man he had known and for Q. “I’m sorry, Hamish…”

 

“He was good man and they broke him. That could have been me. That could have been us.”

 

“I know.”

 

“I don’t think I want to go to work for a while.”

 

“I think Mallory will be alright with that, I think the two of us have earned a break. You were shot after all...”

 

“Can you just hold me for a while? All I can see is him, his head…”

 

“Here,” James helped Q into bed and put his old dog tags around Q’s throat before he lay in front of Q and pulled him to his chest. Q held onto the the dog tags and rested his forehead on James’ chest. “Are you alright?”

 

“Not yet, but I think I will be someday…”

 

“I’ll be here the whole time.”

 

“I know. I love you.”

 

“I love you too…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


	58. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James changes his line of work.  
> The Holmes family looses a member, but they don't change all that much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some fluff, some sadness, some stuff in general. 
> 
> Also, the end. Thank you to everyone who read, commented, stuck with me, and all that jazz. Thank you, xphil98197 for being awesome and helping me out with this. Thank you everyone.

Epilogue

 

The two men in suits were fresh from their holiday as they joined the others who weren’t. The blonde was tanned and the brunette had only gained a shade. Q walked towards the stone in the ground and gently put down flowers. “Sorry we weren’t here, grandmummy.” James said slowly.

 

“It’s alright, dears.” Mrs. Holmes said, sniffling. Mycroft and Sherlock were both calm, but slightly sad. John and Lestrade looked a little bit more human, a little more emotional. 

 

“How are you two handling things?” John asked, glancing at Q and James.

 

“We’re going to have to put two more bouquets down today. We missed a few things while we were away. We need to pay respects to M and to an old friend. It’s going to be a long day.” Q sighed.

 

“You’re making some changes aren’t you?” Sherlock asked.

 

“Yes, we’re going to have to change how we operate a bit.”

 

“And how’s your stomach?” John asked.

 

“Well, obviously, since they had sex not three hours ago.”

 

“Mycroft, you’re at a funeral.” Lestrade elbowed him.

 

“My husband would want to know his kids were still his kids.” Mrs. Holmes smiled.

 

“We were” Q started.

 

“Yes, you were in the shower.” Sherlock finished. “You would have gone without detection, except your walk is a little off.”

 

“Jesus, Sherlock. It’s your son.” John shook his head.

 

“If it is so detection-less, how did you know it happened in the shower?” James asked, after years in the family James had learned just to roll with it. He was often curious as to how the Holmes brain worked. We could have taken a shower afterwards.”

 

“No, you couldn’t have.” Sherlock shook his head.

 

“Nope, not with the way your hair looks.” Mycroft nodded.

 

“What? I missed that one.” James shook his head.

 

“There’s a hint of soap in Hamish’s hair still, he’s normally meticulous.”  John said with a sigh. Everyone turned to look at John. “What? I live with and I raised a Holmes, it rubs off, eventually.”

 

“Yes, he’d be proud to know the family is still his family.” Mrs. Holmes smiled genuinely. “Boys, let’s leave the children to the rest of the cemetery, it’s time for us to get on, it’s too cold for me out here.” She said, grabbing one of Mycroft’s arms and one of Sherlock’s, walking off. They all walked off and James offered Q his arm. Q took it and ran a hand through his hair, frowning when he found the spot where shampoo had clumped, never having been rinsed out.

 

“To M?”

 

“To M.” Q nodded.

 

800Q8

 

“So, this is what you want?” Q asked.

 

“Yes. Are you alright with that?”

 

“Trust me, I’m perfect with it.” Q smiled, kissing James’ cheek as they walked into Q-branch. “I have to get to work, be nice to M.” 

 

“I will.” James smiled and walked towards M’s office. He knocked on the door before he stepped into the office.

 

“Ah, good morning, 007.”

 

“How’s the arm, sir?”

 

“It’s fine, all healed.” M nodded, gesturing to the chair across from him. James smiled and sat down. “So, 007, how’s Q?”

 

“He’s going to need a little more time, but he’s fine for work. I’ll keep working on everything at the home front.”

 

“Good, I hope he feels better.”

 

“You and I both.”

 

“What can I do for you, 007?” M wondered.

 

“Well, sir. I don’t want to leave fieldwork, but I also don’t want to leave fieldwork in a box.”

 

“Well, I think we could use someone to do some freelance work every now and again, if that is what you would like. You realize you’d have to step away from your double-o title though.”

 

“Yes, I heard I did so well that they’re going to retire 007.” M laughed.

 

“Ha, no, we’re keeping the 007 spot, though your record was very good. Are you sure you want this?”

 

“I want to come home for Q, which means less dangerous missions, which means no more double-o. I’m alright with that. And he is too.” James could still travel, still do what he did, but on safer, smaller missions until he finally felt like giving it up. Q got to keep him and he got to keep 

 

“Well, Bond, there’s lots of work to be done. In fact I have an assassination that needs doing in Russia if you wouldn’t mind. Should only take a few days. Are you ready to go back to work?”

  
“With pleasure, M.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much Love.


End file.
